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打工
姐妹花
第八集
第三季
打工
姐妹花
第八集
第三季
\h翻校 大小取胜赛太公
\h翻校 娇小取胜YY猫
后期 灰灰是菇凉\h
时间轴 总监 娇小取胜YY猫 \h
谢谢惠顾 Thank you.
咱们今晚都来了有十个基男客人了 That was like our tenth gay guy tonight.
希望这基男热潮的比亚当·兰伯特的持久 Let's hope our gay buzz lasts longer than Adam Lambert's.
亚当·兰伯特 《美国偶像》选秀节目上的知名参赛者 是已出柜的男同性恋 曾引起一阵讨论热潮
会的 我现在正在搞呢 Oh, it will. I'm all over it.
至于方法嘛 就是去"磨磨"上搞 And by "it," I mean I'm all over Grindr.
麦克斯 你怎么也用这应用 Max, why are you on that app?
你又不是想约炮的基男 You're not a gay man looking for anonymous sex.
少自己给姐定位 Don't put me in a box!
你让我想办法招揽客人 You told me to find ways to drum up business.
而我招揽客人的方法就是 Well, I'm drumming it up by showing off
用这男人的"巨蟒"揽客 This guy's "bid'ness."
我假扮成一个波多黎各籍 犀利放浪 I pretended to be a rough and ready Puerto Rican guy
喜欢抱抱的基男 who still likes to cuddle.
一钓一个准啊 That there's gay chum, my friend.
你看 钓上大鱼了 拿好渔网 Ooh, I hooked a big one. Get the net.
刚才是不是有个威猛的波多黎各哥哥来过 Hi. Was a muscular Puerto Rican guy just here?
一直都有啊 When is there not?
你要不要在这等他时 顺便买个小蛋糕呢 Would you like to purchase a delicious cupcake while you wait?
反正要等 何乐而不为呢 Well, maybe, while I wait.
我手机上显示 他人就在这里啊 My phone says he's right here.
给 免费请你吃 Here, this is on the house,
因为所谓的"威猛基男" 就是他 Because the muscular gay guy, that's him.
你还在变性过渡期不是问题 It's cool that you're transitioning,
但你能不能别假装是波多黎各人啊 but you really should let people know you're not Puerto Rican.
谢谢 Thank you.
他说自己22岁而且不娘 我也是受害者啊 He said he was 22 and butch, so I'm mad too.
厄尔 给我今晚的点菜单[打勾] Earl, I need my checks for tonight.
-美吗 -打勾 - Beautiful? - Check.
-性感吗 -打勾 -Sexy? -Check.
-酷吗 -打勾 - Cool? - Check.
抱歉 我迟到了 Sorry I'm late.
我本来早到了10分钟 I was ten minutes early for my shift,
我就想"我还得消磨20分钟才开始上班" so I thought "well, I have 20 minutes to kill,"
刚好就逛进了一家冲浪用品店 and I wandered into this cool surf shop
然后看到一个男的在给冲浪板抛光 And saw this guy polishing a surfboard.
在这带混的冲浪者 A surfer here?
威廉斯堡不是冲浪的圣地 You don't hang ten in Williamsburg,
hang ten冲浪 直翻则是吊十
是上吊的宝地 You hang yourself.
我同意 布鲁克林这里唯一有的"浪潮" I'm with Max, the only waves we get in Brooklyn
只有热"浪"跟犯罪"潮" are heat waves and crime waves.
厄尔 你没去过海滩吗 Earl, you never go out to the beach?
你疯啦 You crazy?
老子才不要去喂鲨鱼 I'm ain't gonna get eaten by some shark.
也没那个闲工夫 ain't nobody got time for that.
人被鲨鱼咬的几率只有大概百万分之一吧 The chances of you being bit by a shark are, like, 0.0001%.
黑人就不是这几率了 Not if you're black.
鲨鱼超有种族歧视啊 Sharks are racist as hell.
不然人家干嘛叫它们大"白"鲨 That's why they call them "great whites."
冲浪男马克 跟我超投缘啊 Marc, the surfer, and I really hit it off,
他很帅 像年轻版的马修·麦康纳 And he is so cute, like a young Matthew Mcconaughey,
马修·麦康纳 美国男演员 曾有传言做了植发手术
但他头发是真的 but with real hair.
所以基本上是一点也不像 So nothing like Matthew Mcconaughey.
希望他会给我发短信 我超爱冲浪 I hope he texts me. I love surfing.
我从不下水 哪天万一我溺水了 I never go in the water, 'cause I know if I start drowning,
我肯定不会挣扎 I'm not gonna fight it.
我以前夏天会去圣巴斯岛度假 When I used to summer in St. Barths,
那边好多性感意大利冲浪男 there'd be these sexy Italian surfers,
会邀请我们躺他们冲浪板上做日光浴 and they'd invite us to sunbathe on their boards.
虽然还抢劫了我们 但还是很棒的回忆 I mean, they robbed us, but it was amazing.
卡洛琳 如果你喜欢那种男人 Caroline, if you're looking for that kind of guy,
我有个亲戚就很喜欢海边 I have a cousin who loves the water.
因为下了水 他的脚才能动 It's the only place he can move his legs.
挺好啊 但不用了 谢谢 Oh, sweet. No thanks.
你好好考虑吧 Well, think about it.
跟他去任何演唱会都能坐最前排 You'll be at the front row of every concert,
而且他睡觉的时候也不太会乱滚 and he doesn't move around a lot when he sleeps.
给轮椅哥我的电话吧 Here, give old ironside my number.
我喜欢音乐嘛 而且他要骚扰我 What? I love music, and if he bugs me,
我能打电话叫残疾人接送车送他回家 the city has one of those free vans that'll take him home.
冲浪男约我去吃饭呢 It's the surfer asking me out to dinner!
而且他说能带我去那间超火的新餐厅 And he thinks he can get us into the hot, new spot,
"哈洛与女" Harlow and daughters.
就是取代本来那家美味热狗连锁餐厅的 Oh, that's that trendy restaurant that replaced
新开张潮流餐厅嘛 a perfectly good Hot Dog On a Stick.
晚安 一屁股债姐妹花 Good night, broke-ass divas.
晚安 断背服务生 Good night, brokeback waiter.
我要去做个按摩 I'm gonna go get a massage,
之后就不知道了 也帮人"按两下"吧 And then, who knows? Maybe give one.
我糊谁呢 我肯定被人搞大肚子回来 Oh, who am I kidding? I'm coming back here pregnant.
路易斯 明天可以帮我代班吗 Luis, can you work for me tomorrow?
当然是不行 Absolutely not, no.
奥列格明天上班 我会叫他穿渔网背心 Oleg's working, and I'll ask him to wear his fishnet tank top.
那好 Then yes.
跟帅哥一起吃晚饭 Dinner with a cute guy
而且还在抢手餐厅有人的帅哥 who has connections to the "A"-list place?
感觉又回到了以前的生活 I'm living my old life.
大家好吗 Hey, everybody.
你从前生活也有这玩意吗 Did your old life have one of these?
卡洛琳 我餐厅的头号规矩是啥 Caroline, what is my number-one diner rule?
别告诉别人我们用假肉吗 Don't tell anyone the meat isn't real?
哪有啊 你们眼能见 就是真的啊 Come on. If you can see it, it's real.
别告诉别人你是从朋友后车厢 Don't tell anyone you buy the shrimp
买来的虾子吗 out of your friend's trunk?
他有垫一层布 不是这些啦 He lays down a blanket! No.
是不许用手机 No phones.
麦克斯 他订到位了 Max, he got us the reservation!
我要去最新的潮店吃晚餐了 I'm going to dinner at the new "it" place.
哎哟 潮店呢 Ooh, the "it" place!
"咱们去潮店吃晚饭吧" "Let's have dinner at the 'it' place."
为什么我这里就不是"潮店"呢 How come this isn't the "it" place?
这里何止不是潮店 This isn't an "it" place.
这里是"潮坑"吧 It's more of an "it" hole.
好 那我们怎么能变成潮店呢 Okay, so how do we become an "it" place?
首先烧掉这店 重新盖过 First, burn the place down, start fresh.
然后你要弄起一波热潮 Then you create hype by making it
让这里能火到位子都订不到 impossible to get a reservation.
基本上就是谁都不让进 You basically refuse to let anyone in.
能第一个不让我进吗 Can I be the first?
好的 我整理好我的约会包了 Okay, I've put my date purse together.
放了口香糖 唇蜜 以及一张20块钞票 I've got my gum, my gloss, and a $20 bill
好显得我不是一分钱都没有 to make it seem like I have money,
当然我明天就会把钱放回餐厅收银机 which I will return to the register at the diner tomorrow.
也欢迎你用我的约会包啊 Well, you're welcome to use my date purse.
是一个装着雪茄与四角裤的密封袋 It's a ziploc with a cigar and a change of boxers.
我的手机电也充好了 And my phone is fully charged,
确保到时候有电叫接送公司 so I can call an uber car to take me home.
豪华接送公司吗 An uber car?
你哪有钱叫豪华轿车接送啊 You can't afford a fancy town car.
昨天你还用英式松饼去角质呢 Yesterday, you used an english muffin to exfoliate.
是啊 弄完我还吃了它 Yeah, and then I ate it.
而且还是用我们联名信用卡付 Plus, it's on our joint credit card,
每次你犯傻乱花钱 which means every time you make a dumb purchase,
你就欠我一根大麻[联名] you owe me a joint.
我不想让他送我回家 I don't want to have him take me home
这样他会误会的 and give him the wrong idea.
拜托你让他误会吧 Oh, please do give him the wrong idea.
跟人家冲浪男在外鬼混一夜 Stay out all night with the surfer.
滑人家的U型池[不让得逞] ride his half-pipe.
那不是冲浪 那是雪板滑的场地 That's not surfboard, that's snowboard.
厉害 因为我也开始觉得雪板[无聊]了 Perfect, 'cause I'm snow-bored with this conversation.
你觉得怎么样 这对宝贝看起来够露吗 What do you think? These things on full display?
我不想当小气室友 I hate to be that roommate,
但我有准你借我的胸部去用吗 but I didn't say you could borrow my breasts.
就是集中托高胸罩外加隐形胸罩 What? It's just a push-up bra, chicken cutlets,
再塞一点纸巾 以及贴胶带 a little tissue, and some tape.
你懂的 纯天然嘛 You know, natural.
赶紧滚去约会吧 Just go on your date already!
我跟南希一直在等你走呢 Nancy and I have been really looking forward to you leaving
我们要在家脱光光 顺便吸吸猫毒品 so we can walk around naked and do some lines of cat nip.
肯定是他吧 Ooh, that must be him.
别担心 他不会进来 Don't worry, he's not coming inside.
那最好 我们养不起多一个白痴婴儿了 He better not, cause we can't afford a baby.
就苏菲啊 Oh, it's just Sophie.
"就苏菲" "Just Sophie"?
我在波兰的脱口秀就叫这名字 That was the name of my talk show in Poland.
真希望我能上你节目当来宾 Oh, how I wish I could have been a guest on that show.
没有来宾啊 "就苏菲"而已 No, there were no guests. It was just Sophie!
卡洛琳 准备好要去重要约会了吗 Oh, you getting ready for your big date, Caroline?
你怎么知道我有约会 How did you hear about my date?
你的声音响彻云霄 Oh, well, your voice travels.
我听得到任何你这里 你"那里" Yeah, I hear everything that does and doesn't happen
有发生或"没发生"的事情... down here and down there, so...
总而言之我很庆幸你要去约会 So let's just say I'm very glad that you're going on a date.
我给你带了小礼物 Oh, and I got you a little present.
肉桂薄荷糖 为接吻做好准备 Cinnamon mints, for your first kiss.
你人真好 苏菲 Oh, that's so sweet, Sophie.
还给你带了一大袋避孕套 Yeah, and I got you a big grab bag of condoms.
各种尺寸都有 I got all sizes.
这里有巨号 超巨号 I got magnums, I got super magnums,
也有一般大小 还有... I got regular, and...
"他是以性格取胜"的适用套 "He's got a great personality."
那去吧 Here you go.
通常 碰到"性格取胜"鸟 Usually, a "great personality"
我避之唯恐不及 套套完全可以省掉 is the only birth control I need.
谢谢 但我是个淑女 Thank you, but I am a lady,
我们约会没超过三次 绝对不会上床 and I won't be needing these until our third date.
那你赶紧去换衣服吧 Well, you better hurry up and get dressed.
苏菲 我已经换好了 Sophie, I'm already dressed.
换好了咩 You are?
我喜欢我这一身衣服 And I like what I'm wearing.
是咩 You do?
好吧 那就化点妆 Well, just put on a little makeup.
我全化好了 I'm fully made up.
化好了咩 You are?
那好吧 那就顺便弄弄头发 Oh, well, you know, maybe when you do your hair.
我头发的确是有点没弄完 Okay, I'm a little behind on my hair.
我胸部的工程比我想象中大 所以... My boobs were a bigger project than I thought.
我喜欢我这一身打扮 也没时间换了 And I like what I'm wearing, and I don't have time to change
因为他已经迟到20分钟了 'cause he's already 20 minutes late.
迟到20分钟了啊 20 minutes late?
那看来是不来了 That's a no-show.
你被人放鸽子啦 You've just got stood up.
被人狠狠地放了鸽子 You got stood up somethin' awful.
我才不是被放鸽子 我从来没被人放过鸽子 I did not get stood up. I've never been stood up.
而且 就算被放鸽子了我也不会知道 In fact, I wouldn't even know if I was being stood up,
因为我完全不知道什么是被人放鸽子 because that's how little I know about being stood up.
我被放鸽子了吗 Am I being stood up?
没有啦 男人很会迟到 No, you are not. Guys are always late.
我有一次等了一个男的三天呢 I once waited three days for a guy.
但他带着收到的赎金来了 But he showed up with the ransom money,
从此我也摆脱住冰箱的生活 and you don't see me living in a fridge anymore.
好吧 行行行 Okay, fine.
某人没被放鸽子 Nobody got stood up.
我就在坐在这发发短信 顺便等... So I'll just sit here and text while we wait...
你懂吧 一辈子 You know, forever.
直到你哪天醒悟了 And then, finally, when it dawns on you,
我们就打给奥列格 让他去下江湖追杀令 we can call our friend oleg, and he can go put a hit on him.
他有可能是以为在餐厅见面 You know what, maybe he thought we were meeting there.
我打去问问看吧 I'm calling the restaurant to see--
你好 请问马克·费森到场入座了吗 Yes, hi, has a Marc Faison checked in yet?
还没 He has not.
那现在到了吗 What about now?
因为他本来... It's just that he was supposed--
我也忙啊 Well, I'm busy too.
干嘛这么拽啊 Don't be so snooty,
你们那边以前也就是家热狗店 You used to be a Hot Dog On a Stick.
先说好 就算他没来 Just a heads up, if he doesn't show,
我也一样会脱光 I'm still getting naked.
他的短信 Ooh, there he is!
不 是亚马逊的通知 No, it's from Amazon.
有人送了我一本《他其实没那么喜欢你》 Someone's sending me a copy of He's just not that into you.
是啊 姐在这挺你 Yeah, I'm here for you, girl.
好吧 我被放鸽子了 Well, I got stood up.
记得你现在所在地点 Remember where you are, Max.
今日是"卡洛琳·钱宁被放鸽子纪念日" This was the day Caroline Channing got stood up.
管他这个放你鸽子的王八蛋 Well, screw him for standing you up.
而且从今往后 永远不许再相信 And from now on, never trust a guy
冲[找]任何非黄片以外东西的男人 who surfs anything besides porn.
你看 "哈洛与女" Oh, look, Harlow and Daughters
这店好有旧时杂货店的那种范儿 Has a real old-timey, general store kind of vibe.
看来他们很认真在办这个 I guess they take "Throwback Thursday"
"怀旧周四之夜"啊 really seriously here.
简直就像重返1840年 I mean, it's 1840.
是啊 我想带你穿越回 Yeah, I wanted to take you back to a time
你还没被放过鸽子的时候 before you were stood up.
麦克斯 谢谢你鼓励我来这里 Thank you for making me take the reservation, Max.
不然我本来打算 I mean, otherwise, I was just gonna
趴床上自怨自艾呢 get in bed and be depressed.
你刚就是趴在床上自怨自艾啊 You were in bed and you were depressed.
别学这帮人一样 搞重写历史好吗 Don't rewrite history just 'cause these folks have.
我们正在威廉斯堡讽刺的潮流中心里 I mean, we are smack in the belly of Williamsburg ironic chic,
我真想拍死他们 and I want to smack it.
他们还有这乡下风晒衣绳 Look, they even have a country clothesline
还吊着婴儿衣服 Hung with baby clothes.
我们应该带这件回去给阿憨穿 We should get this for Han.
这玩意简直是我看过最"装"的东西了 I mean, that is the most pretentious thing I've ever seen.
欢迎来到哈洛与女餐厅 Hi, welcome to Harlow and Daughters.
我是招待员 布莱布莱恩 I'm the host, Brian-Brian.
这才是最装的 No, that is.
你好 布莱布莱恩 Yes, hi, um, Brian-Brian.
我们有订位 费森 两人 We have a reservation. Faison, party of two.
你们都到齐了吗 Is your whole party here?
我不知道我这这人能有多完整[到齐] Well, I don't know how whole I could ever hope to be,
因为我是私生的 as I'm illegitimate.
是我的 我们俩都到齐了 谢谢 Yes, we're both here. Thank you.
所以你与费森先生都到了是吗 So both you and Mr. Faison are here?
我在变性过渡期 你可以去问人 Yes, I'm transitioning. Ask around.
你们先去吧台喝点东西吧 You can have a drink,
等有位子了我就叫你们 and I'll call you when your table is ready.
谢谢 谢谢 布莱布莱恩 Thank you, thank you, Brian-Brian.
我很快过去 I'll be right over.
用你的新咪咪去帮我们搞两个座位 Go use your new boobs to get us a seat at the bar.
你好 我知道"在吧台等带位"的意思 Hi, I know what "wait by the bar" means.
姐在餐厅做服务员时 I've been working in restaurants
你这身衣服还没过时呢 since your clothes were in style.
那句话的意思就是等有位了 我就带... It means I'll seat you when your--
布莱布莱恩 布莱布莱 小布布 别假了 Brian-Brian, Bri-Bri, B.B., come on.
我和你都知道不会有男人来 You and I both know there's no guy coming.
我的朋友被人放鸽子了 所以请不要雪上加霜 My friend got stood up, so please don't make things worse.
快把你酷劲十足的小猎刀拿出来 Just take out your cool, little hunting knife
帮我们一把吧 and cut us some slack.
我本想给你点小费 或是肉偿这份人情债 This is where I'd tip you with cash or offer you sex,
但我是个穷光蛋 而你是个同性恋 but I'm kinda broke and you're kinda gay,
所以你就当做善事吧 so just be nice.
其实真的没必要牵扯到我的性取向 We don't really need to bring my sexuality into it.
了解 一百年前出柜的确很辛苦 I understand, it's hard to be out 100 years ago.
有意思 Oh, funny.
这边请 费森先生 Right this way, Mr. Faison.
这么快就有位子啦 他们人真好 Wow, that was quick. They're so nice here.
对啊 都是些普通人 Yep, just regular folks,
坐在设计师设计的咸菜桶上 sitting around designer pickle barrels.
-这是你们的位子 请坐 -坐哪里 - All right, here's your table. Have a seat. - Sure, where?
坐在我们称为椅子的阿米什产凳上吗 On these Amish birthing stools we're all calling chairs?
继续取笑同性恋就够了 Stick to the gay jokes.
我们的无线密码写在牛皮上 Our wifi password is on the ox hide.
服务员马上就来 Your waitress will be right over.
麦克斯 服务员马上过来服务咱们 Max, a waitress will be right over,
而不是咱们服务别人 and it won't be us.
瞧 脏兮兮的木屑地板 Look, dirty sawdust floors.
如果我们有一麻袋的木屑 If we got a bag of wood chips,
咱们家也能成为新的潮店 our apartment could be the new "it" place.
你们好 我叫约克 Hello, my name is York.
真是难以置信 但布莱布莱恩这个名字 Hard to believe, but a man named Brian-Brian
在"装"这方面完败给她了 has been dethroned.
约克 有趣的名字 York? That's fun.
是"纽约克"的"约克"吗 "York" as in "New"?
是"约克[郡]"的"约克" 别想太多 York as in York. Just York.
那你这身穿着又是怎么回事 So what's this bit?
好吧 约克 Okay. Well, um, York,
我们想先点点喝的 we'd like to start with some drinks.
今晚是闺蜜之夜 Having a girls' night out.
所有单身女性 请把手举起来[碧昂丝歌曲] All the single ladies put ya hands up!
好吧 这不能强求 Yeah, you can't force it.
我们今晚的特饮是 Our special libation this evening
"小瘟疫[天花]" is "The small pox."
是将苦艾酒 丁香 桔子苦汁 It's absinthe, cloves, orange bitters
放入玻璃罐 用手搅拌 hand-muddled in a mason jar.
这酒是韦斯·安德森导演的作品吗 Was that drink directed by Wes Anderson?
擅长拍摄苦乐参半的悲喜剧形式电影
能尽快给我们上两杯你们最便宜的 Can we just get two of your "Ye olde" cheapest beers
"古老"啤酒吗 as soon as possible?
因为女医生 我到时间吃药啦 Because Dr. Quinn, I need some medicine, woman.
源自电视剧《Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman》 讲述的是1867年一位女医生的故事 跟服务员的造型是同一年代
约克 特制浓汤里面有蒜吗 York, does the special soup have any garlic?
天啊 不是吧 Oh, my God, no way!
怎么了 有人在做肥皂吗 What? Is someone making soap?
不是 不吃蒜 No. No garlic?
你还在幻想那个冲浪男会出现 You still think the surfer's coming.
他可能会来啊 Well, he might.
我今晚本来是要跟这个男的约会 See, I was supposed to have a date with this guy--
说了你也不在乎 那说回汤吧 You don't care. So, the soup?
老实说 现在只能点饮品的 Actually, I'm just taking drink orders right now.
真是爱死你了 Wow, who loved you?
我猜她从未跟贩毒给她妈的毒贩子 Eh, I'm guessing she never went to a father/daughter dance
一起参加过父女交谊舞会 with her mom's weed dealer.
你又不知道 麦克斯 或许他手机丢了呢 You don't know, Max. Maybe he lost his phone
他联系不上我 所以他正跑着赶过来 and he didn't have my number, so he's on his way running here.
你觉得他会浑身湿哒哒地冲进来 You think he's just gonna rush in soaking wet
然后跟你说 "抱歉 堵车了 and be like, "Oh, I'm so sorry. The traffic was terrible.
车浪也一波接一波地迎来" The waves were bumper-to-bumper."
这可不是什么烂俗爱情片 This is not a Katherine Heigl movie.
抱歉 是"电影" Sorry, "movie."
好吧 他不会来了 Fine, he's not coming.
我也不会陷入那种烂俗情节幻想中 And I'm not getting into the Katie Heigl thing.
反正此时此刻不会 我们吃橡子吧 Not here, not now. Let's just enjoy our acorns.
哎哟 "未显示号码" Ooh, "Blocked number."
也许是他哦 你好 Maybe it's him. Hello?
挂掉 他稳逼不会来了 Hang up. He's not coming.
我们的酒都好了 Our drinks are right there.
就在那 在古老的吧台上 I can see them over yonder, on ye olde bar.
都过了一个小时了 我们的服务员丽奇·伯顿呢 It's been an hour, where is our waitress, Lizzie Borden?
美国加州1892年一起命案的嫌疑犯
可能在后面算计着 Probably in the back deciding
要把哪个字读得很怪异吧 which words to pronounce weirdly.
我要饿死了 把你的鸡排[隐形胸罩]拿出来吃 I'm starving. Bust out those chicken cutlets.
怪不得点评网站上没有这家店的差评 No wonder they don't have any bad Yelp reviews.
没人能吃着他们的食物 No one's ever tasted their food.
你好 我们的酒呢 Hi. Um, our drinks?
你有问厨师汤的事吗 And did you ask the chef about the soup?
我很忙的 You know, I haven't had a minute.
她居然说自己很忙 She hasn't had a minute?
她在忙什么 与狼共舞吗 What's she been doing, dancing with wolves?
电影《与狼共舞》描述着1860年代的故事
请问 你们有没有 I mean, have you ever?
就是 你们能不能 I know, can you even?
我和拜伦坐在这里好久了 Byron and I have been here forever,
还没有等到我们的蒲公英鹰嘴豆鹅肝 and have yet to see our dandelion chickpea foie-gras.
他是血糖过低 我是莱拉 He's hypoglycemic and I'm Lila.
而我是气坏了 我要去拿我们的酒 And I'm pissed. I'm getting our drinks.
-能给我们拿点白葡萄酒吗 -当然 要什么 - Would you get us some wine? - Oh, sure, what kind?
我要夏敦埃 A chardonnay for me,
-拜伦要白苏维浓 -麦克斯 别去 -and Byron will have a sauvignon blanc. - Max, no,
他们会把我们赶出去的 这样的话 they'll kick us out and--
这样的话是怎么样 卡洛琳 And what? What, Caroline?
等冲浪男来的时候 你会不在吗 You won't be here when he arrives?
上帝啊 那个贱男不会来了 Dear lord, the man is not coming!
我知道 麦克斯 他不会来是因为他死了 I know that, Max, and he's not coming because he died.
他死了 这是我唯一能接受的理由 He died, that's the only reason I can accept.
你好啊 今晚过得如何 What's up? How we all doin' tonight?
不是很好 Not so good.
我的女朋友刚跟我分手 My girlfriend just broke up with me.
是吗 你喜欢金发妞吗 Oh, yeah? You like blondes?
我正好认识一个好勾搭的妞 'cause I got one who's ready to pop.
不必了 我喜欢亚洲妞 No, man, I'm into Asian chicks.
谁不喜欢 Yeah, who isn't?
除了亚洲男人吧 Except for Asian guys.
帮我个忙 几分钟后 Hey, do me a favor, just wait a minute,
去我那桌 跟我的朋友调情 and then come over to my table and flirt with my friend.
我为啥要这么做 Why would I do that?
请你喝 On the house.
这是那道叫"蒲公英鹰嘴豆和其他 Is that the "Dandelion chickpea and other things
不应该放在一起煮"的菜吗 that don't belong in a dish together" thing?
你们的蒲公英鹰嘴豆 All right, your dandelion chickpea,
一杯夏敦埃 一杯白苏维浓 请享用 a chardonnay, and a sauvignon blanc. Enjoy.
你这是在干嘛 What do you think you're doing?
服务顾客 好好学学 Waiting on tables. Look into it.
约克 约克 别生气 York, York, don't be mad.
拜伦饿坏了 我们也渴坏了 Byron was starving and we're thirsty.
别赶我们出去 我们没力气走出这个门 Don't kick us out, we're too weak to go anywhere else.
汤里面有蒜 The soup has garlic.
那就不要了 麻烦来份三文鱼 Oh, then no. The salmon, please.
把汤端上来 她今晚不用跟任何人接吻 Bring her the damn soup, she ain't kissing nobody tonight.
我要一份以为自己能逃出生天的 And I'll have the free-range chicken
自由散养土鸡肉 that thought it had a chance.
谢谢你帮忙 拜伦给你的 For your help. Byron wants you to have it.
拜伦是这里唯一真正的守旧派 Well, Byron is the only real old-fashioned thing in here.
希望你们俩能活过这个冬天 I hope you both survive the winter.
我能加入吗 Hey, can I join you?
我觉得他那句话是对你说的 Ooh, I think that "Can I join you?" was to you.
当然可以 请坐 Oh, sure, have a seat.
你真漂亮 你身材真好 You're pretty. You have a good body.
谢谢你 Wow, thank you.
老实说这话听得很舒服 That's actually kind of nice to hear,
因为虽然这难以让人置信 because this is hard to believe,
但我今晚被人放鸽子了 but I got stood up tonight,
而你夸我漂亮和身材好 and it kind of makes me feel good
让我心里感觉好多了 when you say I'm pretty and I have a good body.
你在干嘛 What are you doing?
我在玩"陌陌" 是异性交友版的"磨磨" Oh, I'm on Tinder. It's the straight Grindr.
有人对我有兴趣 我要走了 I just got a hit. Well, I'm out.
多谢你的酒 Thanks for the drink.
你居然花钱请人来夸我漂亮 You paid a guy to say I'm pretty?
而那个人又丢下我跑掉 And then he blew me off?
天啊 我刚意识到一件令人沮丧的事 Oh, my god. I just realized something upsetting.
什么 我们本可以吃 What, that we could be enjoying
美味的热狗棒吗 delicious hot dogs on sticks right now?
不 我是个"B" No, I'm a "B."
才怪 你是A[罩杯] No, you're an "A."
只不过这个胸罩让你看起来像是B罩杯 That bra just makes you look like a "B."
不 我是说作为女人 No, I mean me, as a woman.
我拿到的分数是"B" I'm a "B."
一直以来 我都觉得自己是"A" You know, all this time, I kinda thought I was an "A,"
但或许我只是个"B" but maybe I'm just a "B."
所以他走掉 所以冲浪男放我鸽子 That's why he walked away and why the surfer stood me up.
卡洛琳 虽然我现在真的很想陪着你 Caroline, I really want to be here for you right now,
但我得给角落的矿工拿一杯杜松子汽水酒 but I gotta get a gin fizz to the prospector in the corner.
麦克斯 我真的是个"B"吗 为什么他不来 Max, am I a "B"? Why didn't he come?
我只知道那个冲浪男是个 All I know about that surfer is that he is a "D"
后面还有三个字母的"D" followed by three other letters.
我本想把这个词说出来的 I'd spell it out for you,
但我真担心我会拼错[dick贱人] but I'm literally afraid I'd get it wrong.
奇妙的是你居然不直接说我不是"B" Interesting that you didn't say I wasn't a "B."
听着 我这辈子从来不给自己评分 Look, I don't give myself letters in life.
对我而言 只有过关和失败两种情况 To me, it is clearly a pass/fail situation.
而你还能直起身坐着 And you're sitting up,
没有流口水到自己身上 这就是过关 not drooling on yourself, so pass.
哎哟 稀客啊 Well, well, well,
你们俩姑娘整晚去哪儿了 where have you ladies been all night?
我不知道 大概是1846年到1860年之间吧 I don't know, I'd say somewhere between 1846 and 1860.
真高兴回到1974年 And it is so great to be back in 1974.
阿憨 厉害啊 把这地方弄得像是人少的潮店 Well, Han, you did a good job of making this place exclusive.
严格说来 就是空无一人 There is literally nobody here.
不是我干的 刚男厕有只负鼠 It wasn't my doing, there was a possum in the men's room.
纠正一下 那只负鼠现在还在男厕呢 Correction, there is a possum in the men's room.
食材又跑出厨房啦 Oh, the ingredients are escaping the kitchen again?
我得去男厕 Well, I gotta go to the men's room
把[裤中]那只"负鼠"抓出来 and pull out the possum.
我们不在的时候 你是不是也都这么干 Oh, is that what you do when we're not here?
好吧 我们去真正上了年头的 Okay, let's sit down in that authentically
破旧卡座里坐着 吃点东西吧 run-down old booth and eat something.
瞧 这些污渍不是假的 那可是真血 Yeah, see, those stains aren't fake, that's real blood.
那个男的被捅的时候 我就在这 I was right here when that guy got stabbed.
记得当时我说 "再叫老娘宝贝 Like I said at the time, "Call me 'honey' one more time,
我就捅死你" and I will stab you."
你知道我刚意识到什么吗 You know what I just realized?
即使我是个"B" 至少我也是个真正的"B" Even if I am a "B," at least I'm an authentic "B."
我不会去伪装自己 I don't pretend to be something I'm not.
你的确是在伪装自己 You do kind of pretend to be something you're not.
你不是"B"[罩杯] A "B."
终于有顾客上门了 Finally, I have some customers.
我一直在后厨坐着 You know, I've been sitting in the back
看着奥列格在拨玉米皮[打飞机] watching Oleg shuck his corn all night?
谢谢啦 Thank you.
路易斯就知道该怎么"服务"他人 Now, Luis knows how to give service.
拜托 小妞 不用这样 太没挑战性了 Come on, chica, don't set me up like that, it's too easy.
麦克斯 我打算不再用字母给自己评分 Max, I think I'm gonna let go of letter-grading myself
我要采用你的过关和失败系统 and adopt your pass/fail system.
跟你一起坐在这里 绝对不是失败 And sitting with you right here is so not a fail.
是奥列格和苏菲 Oh, it's just Oleg and Sophie.
天啊 你刚才的样子就像 Oh, my god! You looked 'cause you thought
你以为是冲浪男来了 超级大失败 it was gonna be the surfer! Epic fail!
你们俩在一起干嘛 Hey, what are you two doing together?
我和苏菲有点事情要处理 Oh, Sophie and I had some business to take care of.
对吧 苏菲 Right, Sophie?
没错 卡洛琳 我们支持你 Oh, yeah. Caroline, we got your back.
那个麦克很长一段时间都不能去冲浪了 That Mike won't be out there surfing again for quite a while.
冲浪男叫马克 不是麦克 The surfer's name isn't Mike. It's Marc.
怪不得他一直在大喊 "我不是马克" No wonder he kept screaming, "My name is not Marc!"
告诉你一件事 Well, I'll tell you one thing,
今晚我们可能看见了很多假东西 we may have seen a lot of fake things tonight,
但那绝对是一只真负鼠 but that's a for-real possum.
阿憨那只"负鼠"比我想象中大多了 Wow, Han's possum is bigger than I thought it would be.