我一直都知道我们家很特别 I always knew we were a fairly odd family.
先从我说起 First there was me.
我长的太高，太瘦，头发太黄 Too tall. Too skinny. Too orange.
我妈人很好 但就跟别的妈妈不太一样 My mum was lovely, but not like other mums.
她很靠得住 There was something solid about her.
不按牌理出牌 Something rectangular,
闲不下来，不会感情用事 busy and unsentimental.
英国女王是她的是时尚指标 Her fashion icon was the Queen.
至于我爸就正常多了 Dad, well, he was more normal.
他总是很闲的样子 He always seemed to have time on his hands.
自从50岁生日从大学退休后… After giving up teaching university students on his 50th birthday,
他总是有空陪我聊天… he was eternally available for a leisurely chat or
或是打一场故意放水的桌球 to let me win at table tennis. Ahh! Oh, yes.
还有妈妈的哥哥，戴斯蒙舅舅 And then there was Mum's brother, Uncle Desmond.
他总是西装笔挺 Always impeccably dressed.
每天在家就是… He spent the days just, well,
…做他自己的事 being Uncle Desmond.
没有人比他更容易亲近又贴心 He was the most charming and least clever man you could ever meet.
他总是心不在焉… His mind was on other things,
但我们真的不知道他在想什么 though we never found out what.
最后还有凯萨琳 And then, finally there was Catherine.
凯蒂，小凯，我的妹妹 Katie. Kit Kat. My sister.
在衣着讲求实用的家庭里 In a household of sensible jackets and haircuts there was this,
出了像她这样的天然傻妞 well, what can I call her, nature thing.
她那鬼灵精的眼神… With her elfin eyes,
穿着紫色T恤，总是光着脚丫的模样 her purple T-shirts and her eternally bare feet,
对我来说，她从以前到现在… she was then, and still is to me,
都是世界上最可爱的人 about the most wonderful thing in the world.
整体来说，我有个美好的童年 All in all, it was a pretty good childhood.
每天都用同样的步调做同样的事 Full of repeated rhythms and patterns.
即使我到了21岁… By the time I was 21, we were still
我们全家还是会每天到海边喝下午茶 having tea on the beach every single day.
打水漂和吃三明治… Skimming stones and eating sandwiches,
不分季节，风雨无阻 summer and winter, no matter what the weather.
每周五晚上还会一起看电影 And every Friday evening, a film,
一样风雨无阻 no matter what the weather.
还有我讨厌却每年必办的跨年派对 And then once a year, the dreaded New Year's Eve party.
我去…拿点喝的 Yeah, I might just get one.
你长得太帅了 You're absolutely gorgeous.
我是凯蒂，你给我喝什么？ I'm Katie. What am I drinking?
这很贵的 This is very expensive stuff.
干杯 - 干杯 Cheers. Cheers.
来吧，快午夜了 Come on, it's nearly midnight.
我们到隔壁房间去 We're all going through. We're going through.
我来帮你找个… Look, I've gotta find you a...
天啊！ Oh, God!
每个人难免都会犯点小错 Everyone makes little mistakes.
没事的，快过来 It's fine. Come on.
…6，5… ...6, 5,
…4，3，2，1 4, 3, 2, 1.
新年快乐！ Happy New Year!
新年快乐 Happy New Year.
对不起 Sorry.
我隔天早上起来酒醉很严重… And so I woke up the next morning,
深感羞愧 hung-over, ashamed of myself,
却还不知道我的人生将从此改变 and not realising it was the day that would change my life forever.
起床了，笨蛋 Get up, stupid.
老爸找你 Dad wants you.
你的睡衣还真性感 Oh, hello. Sexy pyjamas.
提姆，进来吧 Ah, Tim, come in.
你就… Uh, do
…坐下吧 sit down.
干嘛这么认真 That's very formal.
是啊 Well, um, yeah.
现在对我来说心情很复杂 This is an odd moment for me
因为在我21岁生日过后 because I had the same moment with my
我爸爸也做了同样的事 father when I'd just turned 21, and after it,
让我的人生从此改变 my life was never the same,
所以我现在很紧张 so I approach it pretty, um, nervously.
好吧 Okay.
你准备好再说，有够神秘 When you're ready. It's all very mysterious.
好… Uh... Right.
提姆，亲爱的儿子 Tim, my dear son, the, uh...
其实我们家的男人都有一种天赋 The simple fact is the men in this family have always had the ability to...
这听起来可能有点怪 This is going to sound strange,
你最好做好心理准备 be prepared for strangeness.
千万别吓傻了 Get ready for spooky time,
但我们家有一个秘密… but there's this family secret.
那就是每个男人都能… And the secret is that the men in the family can
…穿越时空 travel in time.
正确来说是回到过去 Well, more accurately, travel back in time.
我们不能到达未来 We can't travel into the future.
这玩笑也太诡异了 This is such a weird joke.
我真的没在开玩笑 It's seriously not a joke.
你是说你和爷爷… So you're saying that you and granddad, and his brothers
…还有他的兄弟都能回到过去？ 没错 could all travel back in time? Absolutely.
你现在还能这么做？ - 当然 And you still do? Absolutely.
其实没有你想的那么夸张 Although it's not as dramatic as it sounds.
我只能回到自己的过去 It's only in my own life.
我只能去我到过而且记得的地方 I can only go to places where I actually was and can remember.
很遗憾，我不能去杀希特勒 I can't kill Hitler
或跟特洛伊的海伦上床 or shag Helen of Troy, unfortunately.
先等一下 Okay, stop.
如果这是真的，虽然不是 - 是真的 If it's true, which it isn't. Although it is.
当然不是，但如果是的话 虽然不可能 Although it isn't, obviously. But if it was, which it's not.
是真的 -不是，但如果是，我要怎么… Which it is. Which it isn't. But if it was, how would I...
怎么做其实很简单 The "How" is the easy bit, in fact.
找个阴暗的地方 You go into a dark place, big cupboards are
大的置物间通常很好用 必要时厕所也可以 very useful generally. Toilets, at a pinch.
然后像这样握紧拳头 Then you clench your fists like this.
想着你要去的那个时刻就可以了 Think of the moment you're going to and you'll find yourself there.
可能会需要练习一阵子 After a bit of a stumble and a rumble and a tumble.
你这种反应还算好的 Is as good a reaction as any.
我当时脱口而出的是“操！” I think I plumped for "fuck!"
但那是70年代 but it was the '70s.
不，我当你在开玩笑 - 这不是玩笑 No, this is so obviously a joke. It's not a joke.
我为什么要骗… Why would I lie to someone I'm
…我算是喜欢的儿子？ - 好吧 fairly fond of? Okay.
等我去完置物间 握紧拳头再回到这里… But, when I come back downstairs after standing in a cupboard with my fists clenched,
你就麻烦大了 you're gonna be in so much trouble.
那就试试看吧 Well, let's see, shall we?
提姆，做点有趣的事 Oh, and, Tim, try and do something interesting.
你麻烦大了 So much trouble.
我说真的 I mean it. Really.
来试试吧 Right.
提姆，你还好吗？ - 好到不行 You all right, Tim? Yes. Yeah. Good, ace. Yeah.
很好，来吧，快午夜了 Good, come on. It's nearly midnight and we've got to find...
我来帮你找个… Whoa, whoa, whoa!
午夜了 Whoo! Midnight.
10，9，8，7 10, 9, 8, 7,
6，5，4 6, 5, 4,
3，2，1 3,2,1.
新年快乐！ Happy New Year!
谢谢你，提姆 - 不客气，波莉 Thank you, Tim. You're welcome, Polly.
妈知道吗？ Does Mum know?
不知道 - 那么那个所谓的蝴蝶效应呢？ Not a whistle. Strange. And what about the whole... Butterfly effect thing. What can I say?
至少我们还没有毁掉人类文明 We don't seem to have messed up civilisation yet.
今年会变得很复杂 It's gonna be a complicated year.
你的人生会变得很复杂 It's gonna be a complicated life.
你用这种能力做了什么？ What have you done with it?
我不停的看书 For me, it's books, books, books.
我读遍了人一生中可以读的书 I've read everything a man could wish to.
还读了两次，狄更斯的著作三次 Twice. Dickens three times.
你想怎么做？ Any first thoughts?
除了剪个好看一点的发型… Well, I suppose apart from getting a slightly better haircut...
当然有钱最好 - 钱有好有坏 Yeah. ...money would be the obvious thing. Very mixed blessing.
金钱完全毁了你爷爷的人生 Utterly screwed up your grandfather's life.
让他得不到爱情与友情 Left him without love or friends.
我从没见过真正快乐的有钱人 I've never bumped into a genuinely happy rich person.
不用工作的话会不错 It would be nice not to have to work.
不，那只会让你有凄惨下场 No, that's a real recipe for disaster.
看看弗瑞德叔叔就知道 Look what happened to Uncle Fred.
他怎么了？ What happened to Uncle Fred?
一事无成，浪费了大好人生 Absolutely sod all. Wasted his life.
你要把它用在你真正想要的事上… You have to use it for things that you really think
…过你真正想要的人生 will make your life the way you want it to be.
你好好思考一下 Come on, really think about this.
那么 Well,
说真的，在这个当下… to be honest, I suppose, at the moment,
我只想用它来交到女朋友 it would be just great if it could help me get a girlfriend.
真是了不起 Massive.
是啊 Yeah.
我最大的心愿 The mothership.
我是个爱情至上的人 For me, it was always gonna be about love.
而那年夏天我卷入了爱情的风暴 And that summer I walked into the eye of the storm.
她叫夏绿蒂 Her name was Charlotte. Cousin of Kit Kat's
是小凯帅气的混账男友吉米的表妹 handsome but nasty boyfriend Jimmy.
她要求我们家住整整两个月 And she was staying for two whole months.
提姆… Tim,
你能帮我擦防晒油吗？ will you do my back?
当然可以！ Absolutely!
真热心！ Very keen!
糟了 Whoa! Oh, no.
糟了 Oh, no.
怎么会这样 Oh, no. No, no. No, no, no.
有沾到头发吗？ - 有！ Is it in my hair? Yes!
提姆 Tim.
你能帮我擦防晒油吗？ Will you do my back?
没问题，等我一下 Sure. Just give us a sec.
好 Okay.
谢谢 Thank you.
来… Now...
好舒服 Ooh. Nice.
这是我的专长 It's my area.
那个夏天充满了日光浴和折磨 It was a summer of suntan and torture.
我邀我的笨蛋朋友杰伊来打网球 I invited my foolish friend Jay around for tennis
因为我以为他能凸显出我的好 because I thought he'd make me look good.
Ah! Ow!
结果我错了！ I was wrong!
你搞什么？ Ow! What are you doing? Oh, no.
夏绿蒂让我们两个看起来像白痴 Charlotte just made both of us look like idiots.
提姆，你运气真背 Bad luck, Tim.
这样是要怎么专心打球？ How the hell are you meant to concentrate on your game?
这种鸟状况是要我怎么过生活？ How are you meant to live your life with this sort of shit going down?
情况一直没有好转，直到… It never got better until suddenly
…快要来不及之前 it was almost too late.
这是夏绿蒂最后一顿午餐了 Well, Charlotte, our final lunch.
我不要！ No!
我们很开心这个夏天有你一起 And it's been really, really lovely having you all summer.
没错 - 谢谢你们 It has. Thank you. Thank you.
真的很开心 - 对吧，戴斯蒙？ It really has. Hasn't it, Desmond?
你说什么？ - 夏绿蒂来我们很开心 Beg your pardon? Lovely having Charlotte here all summer.
谁是夏绿蒂？ Charlotte? Who's Charlotte?
拜托，亲爱的 Come on, darling.
夏绿蒂就坐在你旁边 Charlotte, sitting next to you.
当然，当然，夏绿蒂 - 你好 Oh, yes, of course. Of course. Charlotte. Hi.
很高兴认识你 Lovely to meet you.
提姆，夏绿蒂来过暑假你开不开心？ Have you enjoyed having Charlotte here all summer, Tim?
开心 Yeah.
八月就快过完了 There goes August.
大部分的事都是我教他的 I've introduced him to most things, haven't I?
是啊，你那时是比较成熟 You did. You were much more sophisticated.
希望你是指我很安静 In a quiet way, I like to think.
请进 Come in.
夏绿蒂 - 怎么了？ Charlotte. Yeah!
既然你明天就要走了 As it's your last night,
我能问你一个问题吗？ can I ask you a question?
可以啊，你问 Oh, yeah. Ask away.
不，等等 No, wait.
该不会和感情有关吧？ It's not going to be about love, is it?
感情？什么意思？ Love? What?
小凯警告过我 Well, it's just that Kit Kat warned me that if you
如果你跟我告白，我应该… were to ever mention it, I should be
…坚持要你把我当妹妹看待 very firm with you and tell you you must treat me like your sister
不要想太多 and not be stupid.
还是其实我会错意了 Or have I just made a total fool of myself
你只是想在半夜最后一刻… and you were actually going to ask me for
问我打网球的诀窍 late night last minute tennis tips?
不，是有关感情的事 No, it was the love thing.
这样啊 Oh. Well.
你人真的很好 That's very sweet of you.
可惜你等到最后一晚才开口 It's just a shame you left it till the last night.
你应该在我们还有时间的时候 You should have tried creeping along
多在我房外逗留的 the corridor while we still had time.
所以最后一晚才开口很糟糕？ Okay, the "last night" was a bad idea?
很糟糕 Very bad idea.
现在想起来是有点侮辱人 It feels like an ever so slightly insulting afterthought.
最后一晚才告白是行不通的 "Last night" was never going to work.
好，我懂了 All right. Good. I've got it.
请进 Come in.
提姆 - 夏绿蒂 Tim. Hi. Charlotte.
请坐 Hi. Sit down.
我猜你可能已经知道了 I know you've probably suspected this,
过去这个月我已经无可自拔的爱上你 but over the last month I've fallen completely in love with you.
这件事会发生很自然 Now obviously this was gonna happen
因为你有着女神般的脸孔… because you're a goddess with that face
还有头发 and that hair,
但就算你长得不漂亮 but even if you didn't have a nice face,
甚至一根头发也没有… and even if you had absolutely no hair
像是接受某种奇怪治疗之类的… because of some bizarre medical reason,
我还是会喜欢你 I'd still adore you,
所以我… and I...
我只是想知道有没有可能… I just wondered whether, by any chance,
你对我也有感觉 you might share my feelings.
这样吧 I tell you what.
要不要等到夏天结束… Why don't we see how the summer goes
我离开前一晚你再问我？ and then you ask me again on my last night?
最后一晚？ - 是啊 Your last night? Yes.
最后一晚再问我… Try me on the last night.
到时再看怎样 See what happens then, shall we?
不是很刺激吗 It's exciting.
是喔 Right.
这样好极了 No, it's a perfect plan.
没问题，最后一晚再说 That's absolutely perfect. Last night.
最后一晚 Last night.
谢谢你 Thanks very much.
晚安，提姆 Night-night, Timmy.
重要的第一课… Big lesson number one,
穿越时空并无法让人爱上你 all the time travel in the world can't make someone love you.
再见！ Bye!
我的人生挚爱就这样离开了 So the love of my life just drove away.
而隔天也轮到我了 And the very next day it was my turn to leave.
这些给你 There you go.
别一次全花光了 Don't spend it all at once.
谢谢 Thanks.
别太常打回家 Don't call too often,
你妈不喜欢被打扰 your mother doesn't like to be disturbed.
我知道，谢谢 Okay. Thanks.
我坐上火车去伦敦寻找未来… I caught the train to London in
还有女朋友 search of a future and a girlfriend.
我会住在靠近艾比路的圣强梧区 I was staying in St John's Wood, near Abbey Road,
那是我爸爸的剧作家朋友哈利的家 with a playwright friend of my dad's called Harry.
来到新环境有亲朋好友能投靠… It's always nice to have family connections
总是件好事 when you're a new kid in town.
你该死的想要干嘛？ What the fuck do you want?
我是詹姆斯的儿子 - 谁？ I'm James's son. Who?
詹姆斯雷克 - 他怎样？ James Lake. What about him?
他说你有空房间 He said you had a room.
给我进去里面等 Go in there and wait.
安静点，我警告你别发出声音 Quietly. I mean it, don't make a sound.
否则我就杀了你 Or I'll kill you.
我好不容易想到了十年来最好的点子 I was actually having the first good idea I've had for a decade
你就给我按门铃 when you rang on the doorbell.
现在灵感都没了 But now it's gone.
小王八蛋 You little shit.
你爸好吗？ How's your dad?
我一直觉得他是个怪咖，说不出的怪 Weird cock, I always thought. Something weird about him.
是吗？ - 我对他从来都没什么好感 Really? Yeah, I never really liked him, actually.
你妈还是长得像安迪华荷吗？ Your mum still look like Andy Warhol?
你说什么？ What?
顺带一提，那是我老婆 That, by the way, is my wife.
真好 - 她一开始不是很讨喜 Oh. Nice. Yeah, you wouldn't like her at first.
嘴很贱 Sarcastic cow.
但到后来你会发现… But eventually you'd realise that
…她是世界上最好的人 she's the best human being in the world.
这也是为什么她会离开我 Which is why she left me, of course.
这就是你房间 Here you go.
尽量不要太吵 Try not to make too much noise,
尤其是炒饭的时候 particularly when having sex.
不会有这种事 No chance of that.
要命，这里住了两个窝囊废 Oh, Christ, two losers in one house.
那是我女儿 That is my daughter. Oh.
喜欢的话上她没关系 Have sex with her if you like.
因为显然所有人都上过了 Apparently everyone else has.
这种气氛实在不可能有啥新恋情 It wasn't a hopeful set-up for romance.
在工作上也没什么机会 And work didn't help on that score either.
法律界似乎是个男人的世界 The world of law seems to be entirely full of men.
你好，我是罗瑞 Hello. I'm Rory.
很高兴认识你，太开心了 Very pleased to meet you. A real thrill.
说不定我们会成为哥儿们，谁知道 Well, who knows, we might become, you know, pals, et cetera.
你是哪个家伙？ - 提姆雷克 Who the hell are you? Tim Lake.
希望你比这笨蛋有用 Well, I hope you're better than this clown.
动作快，罗杰 - 我叫罗瑞 Come on, Roger. It's Rory, actually.
我已经来一年半了 I've been here a year and a half.
我只是谦虚，其实是两年 I'm just saying that to be nice. It's two years actually.
寂寞的六个月过去了 So six lonely months went by
还是哈利跟我两个人的日子 and it was still just me and Harry.
我没日没夜的做律师的工作 Me lawyer-ing every hour of the day and night.
他则在为新剧本做最后的修饰 And him putting the finishing touches to his new play.
不管世界上有多少女孩… No matter how many girls there were in the world,
我最后还是只能跟罗瑞在一起 I always seemed to end up with Rory.
直到突然有一晚… Until, out of the blue,
我和不可靠的杰伊去了个新鲜的地方 on a dodgy night out with dodgy Jay,
奇迹发生了 something miraculous happened.
这里的服务生… ...the waiters are,
听好了，都是盲人 - 真的假的？ wait for this, right, they're blind. Oh! You're kidding me?
我说真的，就像蝙蝠一样瞎！ I'm kidding you not. No, as bats. As bats!
欢迎光临本餐厅 Very good to have you here, gentlemen.
希望你们会喜欢今天的体验 I hope you enjoy your experience.
卡洛会带你们入座 Carlo will show you to your table.
太好了，大师请带领我们吧 Great. Lead on, maestro.
请把右手放在我肩上 Can I have your right hand on my right shoulder, please?
你的朋友也把手放在你肩上 And your friend hold on to your shoulder. Thank you.
请注意阶梯，小心脚步 Mind the stairs and be prepared because
因为里面非常暗 it's completely dark.
先生们，你们不介意的话… Okay, gentlemen, if you don't mind,
我安排你们坐在两位年轻小姐旁边 I can sit you here beside these two young ladies.
这样再好不过了！ No, no. Sounds absolutely perfect!
你听起来很兴奋 - 我是，而且很帅 Oh, God, you sound very perky. I am. And very handsome.
有人来了 Oh! Someone's there.
你好 - 你好，我是玛丽 Hi. Hi. I'm Mary.
我是提姆，我妈妈也叫玛丽 I'm Tim. Mary's my mother's name, actually.
这名字适合她吗？ - 还可以 Does it suit her? Sort of.
但她有点…壮 Although she's sturdy,
所以叫“伯纳”可能比较适合 so Bernard might have been a better fit.
这样啊 Okay.
有人摸了我的手肘 - 不是我 Oh! Something just touched my elbow. Okay, that wasn't me.
那更糟，不是你那是谁？ No. Well, that just makes it worse. If it wasn't you, who was it?
也不是我，因为我在摸其他东西 It wasn't me because I'm touching something else.
对，请你马上移开，谢谢 Yes, and you'll stop that right away, thank you.
小姐们，说真的 So, girls, be honest,
你们谁比较漂亮？ who is more beautiful?
是我 - 没错，是她 - Oh, I am. - Yeah. She is.
太好了！ Excellent!
我其实长得像凯特摩丝 - 真的吗？ Actually, I look like Kate Moss. Really?
骗你的，其实我长得像松鼠 No. I sort of look like a squirrel.
你喜欢凯特摩丝？ - 超爱的 Do you like Kate Moss? I absolutely love her.
我差点要穿她的衣服过来，你呢？ In fact, I almost wore one of her dresses here tonight. You?
不，不，我穿她的衣服不会好看 No, no, her clothes look terrible on me.
真不敢相信下星期也是你生日 I cannot believe that it's your birthday next week as well.
你朋友杰伊真的很热情 Your friend Jay is quite enthusiastic.
我其实很讨厌他 I actually hate him.
乔安娜是个怎样的人？ What's Joanna like?
她基本上就像个妓女 She's basically a prostitute. Yeah.
这应该是草莓慕斯，要来一点吗？ I think it's strawberry mousse. Ooh! Do you want some?
好，让我吃一点 - 你的嘴在哪？ Um... Okay. I'll try it. Okay, where's your mouth?
在… Uh, it's...
在这里 - 好，这里吗？ It's here. Okay. Mmm... There? Oh!
糟糕，我戳到哪里？ - 我的眼睛 Oh, my God, what was that? That's my eye.
整个都… I think there's a lot of... I've got quite a lot of
我眼睛里都是草莓慕斯了！ strawberry mousse in my eye now!
真对不起 - 没关系，谢谢你 I'm so sorry.
这是一种新的感官体验 No. Thank you. That's a new sensation for me.
那我们等一下就外头见？ So, maybe I'll see you outside or...
好，好啊 Yeah. Yeah, great.
很好，真紧张 Great. Scary.
是啊，有点害怕 Yeah, it's a bit scary.
天啊，她迷上我了 Oh, my God, I'm so in there.
你那边怎么样？ What about you?
不知道，但她听起来很不错 I don't know, but she sounded wonderful.
乔安娜？ - 杰伊 Joanna? Jay.
妈呀，你有够正 Christ, you're a babe.
想不想再继续？我可以甩开那家伙 How do you fancy stretching the night out a bit? I can ditch the loser.
我们在赶时间 We've got to rush, but help me find a cab
但如果你帮我拦到计程车 and I might give you my number.
我可能会给你电话 Of course. Yeah.
或者不会，我还没决定 Or I might not. Haven't decided yet. So...
其实我才不会给他 I have. It's not gonna happen.
我朋友… - 她和杰伊… Where's... Oh. She and Jay just...
她刚带他去…我不知道 She took him to... I don't know.
好吧 Right.
我想我该… Oh, well, I guess I'd better...
我如果跟你要电话会不会很失礼？ Would it be very wrong if I asked you for your number?
不会 No.
以防我想问你一些… Just in case I ever had to call you about...
事情？ Stuff? Mmm-hmm.
好 Okay.
你可以… Would you...
我叫玛丽 - 玛丽 It's Mary. Mary.
好了 Okay.
我本来觉得这支手机又旧又烂 I thought this phone was old and shit,
但现在它是我生命中最宝贵的东西 but suddenly it's my most valuable possession.
你真的喜欢我？ You really like me?
即使我穿这样的洋装？ Even my frock?
我喜欢你的洋装 I love your frock.
还有我的头发不会太…褐色吗？ And my hair? It's not too brown?
我超爱褐色的 I love brown.
我的浏海才刚剪 - 浏海很好看 My fringe is new.The fringe is perfect.
它是最好看的部分 Fringe is the best bit.
玛丽！ Mary!
我们得走了！我拦到了计程车 We have to go! I found a cab
他讨人厌的朋友要开始骚扰我了 and his dodgy friend is about to assault me.
好，来了 Okay, I'm coming.
再两秒 Two seconds.
希望能再见到你 I hope I see you again.
一定会的 You Will.
太好了 Okay. Good.
晚安 Goodnight.
你衣领的钮扣
你头发的颜色
你曼妙的深影无所不在
我想活到天荒地老
看着你在空中起舞
怎么了？ What's happened?
你怎么把自己搞成这样？ What have you done, you poor thing?
没事，只是皮肉伤 Nothing. It's just a flesh wound.
来 - 谢谢 Here. Thank you.
你应该记得我的剧今晚开演 You may remember, my play opened tonight.
对，没错，演得怎么样？ - 很好 Oh, my God, yes. How did it go? Well. It went well.
观众都感受得到这是一出旷世巨作 You could tell in the room a masterpiece was being unfurled.
真的？ - 真的 Really? Really.
直到剧情来到了关键的时刻… Until, and this is the crucial plot point, I think,
主角演出了史上最难看的忘词场面 until the lead actor had the most massive dry in the history of theatre.
不会吧 - 是真的 No, no, no. Yes, yes, yes.
他不只是忘词而已 He didn't just forget his lines. He forgot his lines to the extent
戏剧艺术史上还没有演员… that no actor has ever forgotten their lines
…能忘词忘到这种程度 before in the annals of dramatic art.
剧评不会写“大师级剧作的诞生” The reviews won't say, "Major masterpiece gets unveiled,"
只会写“大师级演员的失忆” they'll say, "Major actor gets Alzheimer's."
太惨了 - 岂是惨字可以形容 It's a disaster. Is an understatement.
这场首映就像铁达尼号沉船一样 It's the Titanic of play openings,
只是没有生还者 but with no survivors.
所有的女人和小孩… No women, no children,
连凯特温丝蕾都逃不掉 not even Kate Winslet.
全死光了 All dead.
我来想办法 - 什么意思？ Okay. I'll see what I can do. What does that mean?
你想怎么做？ What are you gonna do?
打电话给所有伦敦的剧评人 Ring up every critic
然后帮他们吹喇叭… in London and offer them a blowjob
…吹的他们爽到忘记 if they ignore the fact
所有观众在一片静默中等了半小时 that we sat in total silence for half an hour
就为了一个智障去想一句台词？ waiting for a moron to remember one single line?
我有别的方法 Not quite that.
请进 Hello.
你好，汤姆爵士，我是哈利的朋友 Hello, Sir Tom. I'm a friend of Harry's.
你的台词背得怎么样了？ How's it going with the lines?
对不起，你这话是什么意思？ I'm sorry, what do you mean "the lines"?
在法院的那几幕戏 It's just, you know, in the court scenes,
有些台词还满复杂的 some of those lines are pretty complex.
或许你可以在上台前… And I just thought maybe it might be worth, you know,
最后再瞄一下台词，复习一下 having one last look at the lines before you go on. A little refresher.
给我滚出去 Fuck off out of here.
满嘴屁话的疯子，出去！ You arsing lunatic. Get out!
红毛屁孩，滚！ You ginger twerp. Go on!
死兔崽子… Patronising piece of...
现在轮到辩方 And now the Defence.
我多年来过着厌烦不堪的生活 I have lived many weary years...
他真厉害 - 但从来没有… It's brilliant. ...but never,
…在这么多虚度的光阴中 in that long catalogue of wasted time,
…看过如此令人发指的不公审判 have I ever seen such an atrocious miscarriage of justice.
检察官最后还有什么要补充？ Do the Prosecution have anything final to add?
对不起，借过一下，抱歉 Sorry, excuse me. Sorry.
检察官最后还有什么要补充？ Do the Prosecution have anything final to add?
各位先生… Gentlemen...
各位先生… Gentlemen,
我以极为严肃的态度看待今天的诉讼 I regard today's proceedings with the utmost gravity.
然而… Nevertheless,
我要让大家了解一件… let us be clear of one
…简单且不容置疑的事 simple and salient thing.
这个人… It is the life
…罪恶的一生！ of a guilty man!
其中一个演员好像演到睡着… One of the actors appeared to have actually fallen asleep...
中途离席的小混蛋 Oh, here's the little prick who walked out halfway through.
你错过了最精彩的一幕，蠢蛋 You missed the best scene, you little twerp.
对不起 Sorry.
你觉得布景怎么样？ What did you think of the set?
太棒了 - 真的？我觉得太褐色了 I thought it was incredible. Did you? I didn't. Too brown.
玛丽！ Mary!
糟了 Oh, no.
她的号码不见了 She's gone.
刚才店里有两个女客人 Two girls in earlier tonight.
其中一个是世界上最美的女孩 One of them the prettiest girl in the world.
另一个像高级妓女 The other one like a sort of nice prostitute.
能帮我查查名字吗？ Did you get their names?
有，她们离开一阵子了，我找找 Oh, yes. They left a while ago. Let's see.
不，她们没有订位，而且付现 No, I'm afraid they were walk-ins and it appears they paid by cash.
抱歉 - 没关系，没啥大不了的 Sorry, sir. Oh, that's okay. That's fine, it's brilliant.
只是我的人生结束而已，谢谢你 It's just the end of my life. Thanks so much.
开心点，小子 Cheer up, mate.
你室友可是英国在世最伟大的剧作家 Apparently, you're living with Britain's greatest living playwright.
我通常不读报纸 I don't usually read them, obviously,
但这则评论让我不得不注意 but I couldn't resist this one.
“哈利查普曼锋芒毕露，罪有应得” "Harry Chapman found guilty of genius."
我现在得出去一趟 - 为什么？ I have to go out. Right now. Why?
她是凯特摩丝的粉丝 She loves Kate Moss.
“马利欧泰斯提诺摄影展 凯特摩丝”
我不在乎星期一是否忧郁
星期二和星期三有多灰暗
星期四我还不在意你
我在星期五却陷入了爱河
星期一让人崩溃
星期二和星期三只有心碎
星期四连个影都看不见
我在星期五却陷入了爱河
星期六别过这么快
星期日总是太慢来
但我在星期五从不犹豫
谢谢你来陪我，小凯 Thanks for keeping me company, Kittle.
反正我也没事做 Nothing better to do.
吉米还好吗？ How's Jimmy?
他把我甩了 - 又来了 Dumped me. Ugh. Not again.
工作怎么样？ - 我被炒鱿鱼了 And work? They've sacked me.
一群笨蛋 Idiots.
要喝咖啡吗？ - 麻烦你 Coffee? Please.
我现在才看到这张照片里的猫 I've only just noticed this cat in this picture.
你看见了吗？ See that cat?
看见了，照得真好 I do see that cat. It's very good.
我的天啊 Oh, my God.
我的天啊！ - 怎么了？ Oh, my God! What?
是她 It's her.
是她！ It's her!
就是她！ That's her!
快上吧 You go, girl.
不好意思 Sorry.
你好 - 你好 Hi. Hi.
最近好吗？ How are you?
我…很好 I'm... I'm fine.
能见到你真是太好了 It's so good to see you.
我们没见过面吧 Um... We've never met before.
对喔，该死 Oh, no, fuck.
当然没有 - 没有 No, of course we haven't. No.
抱歉，我想你可能认错人了 Sorry, I think you've mistaken me for someone else.
不… No, no, no.
你叫玛丽 Your name's Mary.
这太诡异了 That's distinctly weird.
你怎么知道？ How do you know that?
你看起来就像个玛丽 Well, you look like a Mary.
怎么说？ - 我妈妈也叫玛丽 In what way? My mum's called Mary.
我看起来像你妈？ I look like your mother?
不，你漂亮多了 No. You're much prettier.
你的浏海很好看 - 我才刚剪… It's a nice fringe, by the way. God, it's new and
…有点太短… - 才不会 probably too short but... No.
好吧，谢谢你 Well, gee, thank you and
很高兴认识你 listen, it was really nice to meet you.
我该走了，我朋友在等我，而且… I should probably go because my friend's waiting for me
你完全是个陌生人 and you're a, you're a total stranger.
我并不认识你 - 是啊，太疯狂了 Total stranger. Yeah, it's crazy stuff.
有一点 - 好 Yeah, kind of. Okay.
再见，玛丽 - 再见 Bye, Mary. Bye.
完了 Oh, no.
怎么样？ - 烂透了 How did it go? It was very poor.
真的很糟 - 再去一次 Very poor indeed, yeah. You gotta go again.
你可以的 - 重来一遍 You can do it. Take two.
她每次看起来都不一样 She just always... She always looks different.
抱歉，又是我 Sorry. It's me again.
不好意思 Hi. Sorry.
乔安娜，这位是… Joanna, this is...
提姆 - 你好，很高兴认识你 Tim. Hello. Nice to meet you.
提姆是个陌生人，他妈妈也叫玛丽 Tim is a total stranger whose mother's name is Mary.
我刚才错把玛丽当成是别人 I just had a weird experience with Mary here of thinking she was someone else. But she wasn't.
不知道能不能跟你们…一起逛？ But I just wondered if I could walk round with you
因为我妹妹小凯刚好要走了 for a while because my sister Kit Kat is about to leave...
是啊 Yeah.
再见 - 还有… Bye. ...and...
所以… And so,
我会很寂寞 I'm about to be quite lonely.
是喔，我们可能得跟你说抱歉了 Right. Well, I think we should probably say no.
对，可是你看他的笑容还满阳光的 No, yes. But on the other hand, he's got a quite nice smile
…头发也很有趣 and sort of, you know, fun hair.
是吧 Yeah.
好吧 All right.
但你得保证你不是以下这几种人 But you have to promise that you are not one of the following things.
一，疯子 One, a lunatic.
我不是 Yeah. No.
二，恋浏海癖 Two, a fringe fetishist.
我只不过是凯特摩丝的超级男粉丝 I'm just Kate Moss's number one male fan.
天啊 - 真的？ Oh, God. Really?
对啊，真的 Yeah. God, yeah.
你觉不觉得她的魅力来自她的经历？ Do you agree that the magic of her lies in her history?
拿她早期不拘形式的照片… That the informality of her early shots
和这些近期作品比较就知道 compared to this stuff so you just always know
虽然身处时尚界 that, despite the high fashion, she's still just
她还是那个在海滩上… that cheeky normal
…大喇喇裸体的平凡女孩 naked girl on the beach?
就是像你讲的那样，完全没错 Couldn't have put it better myself.
我打从心底认同 That's absolutely it. I agree with that profoundly.
要加牛奶吗？ - 要 Milk? Yes.
糖呢？ - 不要 Sugar? No.
男朋友呢？ - 有！ Boyfriend? Yes!
不，你才没有男朋友 No. No, you don't have a boyfriend.
我看起来像是没男友的人吗？ Do I not look like I'd have a boyfriend?
我看起来像是交不到男友的人吗？ Do I look like I'd never get a boyfriend?
才不像，你太没礼貌了 No. That's the rudest thing I've ever heard.
我不是这个意思，我只是没料到… I didn't mean it like that. I just didn't expect...
是最近交的男朋友吗？ Is it quite a new boyfriend?
是啊 Yes.
他来了，鲁博 There he is. Rupert.
他真可爱 - 鲁博？ Yes. He's so cute. Rupert?
各位 Hi, guys.
抱歉我迟到了，我爸有点事 Sorry I'm late, with my dad.
嗨，小鲁 Hi, Rupee.
小鲁？ "Rupee"?
这位是提姆 Well, this is Tim and
我们完全不认识他… we don't know him at all.
我在想我们等一下可以去看电影 Hey, I was thinking we could take in a film after this.
买个爆米花，分杯可乐，腻在一起 Get some mixed popcorn, share a Coke,
好啊 snuggle. Okay.
就这么办 Okay.
你们什么时候认识的？说实在的 When did you two meet? Exactly?
不过是上礼拜的事 Well, it was only a week ago, actually.
一切都发生的太快了 It's all been a bit of a whirlwind,
对不对，小可爱？ hasn't it, poochy face?
有些话不要在大家面前说 I'm gonna have to teach you what you can and can't say in front of people.
不能叫你“小口爱”？ - 不行 No "poochy face"? No.
绝对不行 No. Definitely not.
好了好了 Come on, then.
我想多听你们第一次浪漫相遇的事 More details about this wonderful first meeting?
好 Okay, okay.
那是在…乔安娜？ It was, um, what... Joanna?
6月17日 - 乔安娜办了一个小派对 Oh, June 17th. And Jo was having a little party.
根本是人间炼狱，还好鲁博救了我 A living hell from which Rupert, thank God, rescued me.
这场糟糕的派对办在哪？ And where was this terrible party?
在我的淫窟 My brothel of a flat.
地址呢？这很关键 - 你是侦探吗？ Which is where, though? That's the question, isn't it. What are you, a detective?
不是，抱歉，我的视觉想像很丰富 No, sorry, I've just got a very visual imagination.
我喜欢想像一件事的全貌 I like to imagine stuff completely.
柯菲尔花园街26号 26 Courtfield Gardens, SW5.
大约晚上八点半 Around 8:30.
服装主题是淫荡，这样可以吗？ Dress code, slutty. Will that do?
当然可以 Absolutely, yes. Although I am wondering
那你是几点到达的？早还是晚？ when you got there, Rupert. Early, late?
我准时到，因为真爱在呼唤我 On time, I think. True love was calling.
要命 Oh, God.
我觉得有点不舒服 I actually feel a bit sick now. Just these
可能是马芬蛋糕害的 muffins, I think.
千万别吃蓝莓口味 Never trust a blueberry.
我马上回来 Okay, I'll be back in a tick.
你们是很登对的情侣 You two are such a lovely couple.
这个人怪怪的 - 我觉得他很可爱 Bit weird. He's cute.
我喜欢这个人 - 对，我也是 I like him. Yeah, me too.
“洗手间”
你好，我认识你吗？ Oh, hello. Do I know you?
不…我是玛丽的朋友 No, no, no. I'm a friend of Mary's.
她有别的朋友？ She has another friend?
你真让我惊讶，好极了 Gosh, you amaze me. But hooray.
要吃热狗吗？ Ooh. Hotdog?
我亲手花了好几个小时做的 Took me hours. Made them myself.
谢了 Thanks.
很恶心，根本没熟 Disgusting. Totally undercooked.
回头见 See you later.
要不要上楼比较安静？ Why don't we go upstairs, it's a bit quieter?
你好 - 你好 Hi. Hi.
我是提姆 I'm Tim.
我是玛丽 Mary.
我妈妈也叫玛丽，但先别谈这个 That's my mother's name. Let's not get into that.
我知道这样很突兀 I know this is forward but
但你的表情告诉我 your face tells me
你觉得这场派对是人间炼狱 that you're finding this party to be a living hell.
所以我想邀你跟我去外面吃点东西 So, I just wondered if you might come and have a bite to eat with me instead?
可以的话现在 Right now.
你说什么？ - 看来我应该想清楚再说 I'm sorry? Obviously, I should have thought this through more.
来聊凯特摩丝好了 Let's talk about Kate Moss.
我很喜欢凯特摩丝 I love Kate Moss.
我一直觉得她的魅力来自她的经历 I always think the key thing with her is the history,
拿她早期不拘形式的照片 you know, the informality of her early
和时尚界的作品做比较 shots compared to high fashion stuff
就会发现她仍是一个… so you always know that underneath she's still just the same
…在海滩上大喇喇裸体的平凡女孩 cheeky normal girl naked on the beach. The beach.
我完全同意你的看法 I agree with you completely.
现在离开的话还能多吃几道开胃菜 If we leave now then we can have, you know, more than one starter.
我喜欢你的眼睛 I love your eyes.
我也喜欢你其他五官 And I love the rest of your face, too.
可以吃几道开胃菜？ - 十道都没问题 More than one starter? 10 amazing starters.
你先请 - 谢谢 After you. Thanks.
任何派对只要待十分钟就够了 Ten minutes is long enough for any party, I think.
是啊 Yeah.
特别是这一个 Especially that one.
晚安 Evening, all.
真是个讨人厌的混蛋 God! What a dickhead.
是啊 Yeah.
你是做什么的？ So, what do you do?
我是一间出版社的审稿人 I'm a reader at a publisher.
不会吧！看书就是你的职业？ No! You read for a living?
没错，我的工作是看书 Yes, that's it. I read.
真棒 Oh, that's so great.
这就像人家问“你是做什么的？” It's like someone asking, "What do you do
你回答“我呼吸” for a living?" "Well, I breathe.
“我以呼吸为生，我用呼吸来赚钱” "I'm a breather, I get paid for breathing."
你怎么得到这份工作的？ - 少耍嘴皮了 How did you get that job?
你又是做什么的？ Okay, smart-ass, what do you do?
我是律师 I am a lawyer.
可以这么说 Sort of. Sort of.
很性感 That's sexy.
是吗？ - 我是这么觉得 Is it? I mean, I think so.
西装笔挺的在法院救人 In a suit, in a court, saving people's lives.
挺性感的 Kinda sexy.
可能吧，但没有审稿这么性感 I guess it is. Although it's not as sexy as reading.
坐在办公室小小的椅子上看书 Sitting there in an office, in a little chair reading.
别说了 Okay, stop. Ooh!
别想得太好，这位先生 Just wait right there, mister, because
因为我们出版社接到很多书稿的 a lot of books get submitted to my publisher.
我的责任重大 - 我想也是 So it's an immense responsibility. I bet it is.
但你私底下看书的时候… But when you do normal reading,
会不会失去阅读乐趣 is it ruined because it's your job?
和妓女一样？ You know, like prostitutes?
我总是担心她们不当妓女之后… I always worry that when they stop being prostitutes
会再也无法享受性爱 that they can't enjoy sex any more.
你总是担心这个？ - 有时候会 You always worry about that? No, I sometimes worry about it. Oh, good. Okay.
很好，总是担心这种事的人 Because someone who always worried about that would be a bit of a worry.
想必也很令人担心 When you read a newspaper,
你读报纸时会不会觉得在工作？ do you think, "Forget this, it's work"?
你访问过很多妓女吗？ Have you interviewed a lot of prostitutes?
你看菜单时会不会想… When you read a menu, do you think,
“我不要看这个 除非他们付我现金” "No, I'm not reading this, unless you pay me hard cash."
你要访问多少妓女… How many prostitutes will you need to
…才能解决你的问题？ talk to before this issue is solved?
你打算去东欧和泰国吗？ Are you planning to head to Eastern Europe and Thailand?
你可以陪我走去停车的地方吗？ Um... Would you like to walk me to my car?
当然 - 好 Yes. Why not? Okay.
听起来不错 Sounds like a good idea.
你呢？ - 我有三个哥哥 What about you? Yeah, I have three older brothers.
天啊 Oh, God. Yeah.
他们在哪里？ Where are they?
在你后面 Behind you.
车位是不是很难找？ Did you have trouble parking?
什么意思？ - 你的车停得有够远 Pardon? It's just such a long way to your car.
我的车其实停在家门口 Well, my car's actually parked outside
我刚才是搭别人的车 my house. I got a lift to the party.
原来如此 Okay.
很好，没问题 That's good. That's perfect.
好 Okay.
到了 And here we are.
是啊 My God. Yeah.
车子在那，这是我家 Car, house. House, car.
原来如此 It makes perfect sense.
一切都说得通了 It's very logical.
天啊 Christ.
钥匙… Keys!
我要进卧室换新睡衣 I'm gonna go into the bedroom and put on my new pyjamas.
好 Right.
一分钟之后你可以进来把它脱掉 And then in a minute you can come in and take them off.
如果你想的话… If you want to.
一分钟 One minute.
天啊，你… Oh! God. Are you...
你还好吗？ - 没事 Are you okay? Yeah.
对不起 - 没关系 Sorry. That's okay.
这是前开式的 Oh, it's a front opener.
什么？ - 要从前面开 It's a what? It opens from the front.
对，没错，当然了 Yeah, no, yeah, of course.
谢了 - 不客气 Thanks. Sure.
就是这样 Ooh! Oh! Well done.
我保证下次一定会更好 I'm sure it'll be better next time.
我觉得已经很好了 I thought it was pretty lovely.
对，刚才…真的很好 Right, no, it was really lovely.
你能不能等我一下？ In fact, can you just give me one minute?
好 Okay.
真危险 Dangerous.
你对胸罩真了解 Oh! You really know your bras.
的确是 I like to think so.
你好厉害 Well done.
很多人第一次都会笨手笨脚的 Some people make a real mess of it the first time.
他们是笨蛋 Amateurs.
可以等我一下吗？ Could you give me one second?
好 Sure.
我等不及了 I couldn't wait.
天啊 My goodness.
这是我人生中最棒的一晚 Best night of my entire life.
可能也会是我睡得最香的一晚 And now I've got a suspicion I'm gonna have the best sleep of my entire life.
我的完美情人一次就满足了吗？ So once is enough for my perfect guy?
你这么说可能不太公平 I'm not sure that's entirely fair.
我们迟到了 - 才没有 We're late. No, we're not.
没关系，只是…天啊 It'll be fine. It's only... Oh, my God.
我会爱你多久…
就和天上星星一样永恒
只愿更长久
我会需要你多久… Don't worry, you're coming with.
直到四季…
我们回家吧 I'm taking you home!
…不再更迭
我要如何触动你的心…
只要你还在我的生命中
你说多久我都愿意
我会爱你多久…
就和天上星星一样永恒
只愿更长久
我有个坏消息 Okay. I have some bad news.
你快死了？ - 没那么糟 You're dying? No, not that bad.
我快死了？ - 不是 I'm dying? No.
我爸妈来伦敦玩，等一下会过来 My parents are in town. They're visiting and they're coming around.
天啊，你爸妈？在美国的爸妈？ Oh, God. Parents? American parents? Mmm-hmm.
什么时候？ - 现在 When? Now.
他们有跟我说但我没告诉你 They told me and I didn't tell you
我以为他们会取消 and I thought they'd cancel because
通常都会，但这次没有 they normally do and they didn't.
现在吗？ - 对，你最好把裤子穿上 Now now? Now now. So you should probably put on some pants.
天啊，好 Oh! God. Okay, okay.
对不起 - 他们知道我吗？ Um... I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Do they know I exist?
知道，我有提过 Uh... Yeah. I've mentioned something like you,
但没有讲得很清楚 but nothing very specific.
他们很保守，所以还是别穿这条裤子 Yeah, they're quite conservative, so maybe not those pants.
来了 Okay. Yeah.
天啊 On! on, God. Okay.
你可以拖延一下吗 Could you just stall them. Stall them.
上来吧 Come on up.
什么？ - 对不起，他们不喜欢等 What? I'm sorry, they don't like waiting.
我住这里吗？ - 绝对没有 Okay. Do I live here? Definitely not.
我们有嘿咻吗？ - 有，但你没口交 Are we having sex? Yeah. But not oral.
我没打算聊这个 - 很好，千万不要 I wasn't gonna mention oral. Okay, good, don't.
你觉得会谈到这件事？ How did you think that was gonna come up?
帮我拉一下 Could you help me with this, please?
不知道，不过万一提到就坚决否认 I don't know. If it does, just deny it completely.
谁会问这个？你爸吗？ Who's gonna bring it up? Your dad?
“提姆，你最近 有对我女儿口交吗？” "Tim, had any cunnilingus with my daughter recently?"
谁知道 - 好吧 Well, you never know. Okay.
准备好了吗？ - 好了 Okay. Ready? Yeah.
他们来了 - 对，来了 They're there. Oh, they are, yeah.
就在你后面 - 喔，对 Yeah, right behind you. Okay. Right, okay.
爸！ - 亲爱的 Dad! Hello, sweet.
妈 - 宝贝 Mom. Hi. Hi, honey.
这位是提姆 Oh, this is Tim.
伯父好，伯母好 Hello, sir. Ma'am.
我们是不是应该… Should we come back when you
…等你一个人的时候再来？ haven't got any company, or...
那会有点困难，因为提姆住在这里 Well, that would be quite difficult because Tim actually lives here.
真的？他跟你住？ Really? With you?
对，但我保证我们没有口交 Yes. Yeah, but no oral sex, I promise you.
你说什么？ I beg your pardon?
不好意思 Excuse me.
提姆，你是哪里人？ So, Tim, tell us where are you from, which part of the country?
他家在康瓦尔，那里很漂亮 He's from Cornwall. Yeah, it's really pretty.
在英国最西南端，形状有点像鞋子 It's that little bit right at the end, sort of looks like a shoe.
你是律师对吧？ And you're a lawyer, is that right?
没错，他一场官司都没输过 Yep, that's right. And he never loses.
就算你以为他要输了… You don't think he's gonna win, then he just
他也会突然神来一笔的又赢了 pulls something out of the bag and, what do you know, he wins again.
你有试过自己回答问题吗？ Do you ever answer any of your own questions?
有，他通常都自己回答… I, uh... Yes, he does. Usually he does,
但今天不行，因为我很紧张… but not today because I'm doing all the talking because I'm really nervous
也因为我很爱他，所以我… and I kinda love him and I just...
我…希望你们也会喜欢他 I want you to, too.
亲爱的 Oh, honey.
抱歉，提姆，交给你了 Sorry. Tim. Over to you.
说吧 Shoot
我认为我爸… - 我再说一件事就好 Yeah, I think my dad... Can I just say one more thing?
终于结束了 Thank God that's over.
我有两张国家剧院明天的票 I got given two tickets
要不要一起去？ for the National Theatre tomorrow. Do you wanna come?
不要，我想睡一整天 Oh, no, so not. I'm just gonna sleep all day.
去看舞台剧也超好睡的啊 I don't see why going to the theatre should get in the way of that.
我人生中睡得最熟的几次… Many of the best sleeps of my life have happened
就是去看皇家莎士比亚剧团 in the Royal Shakespeare Company.
不要，你找别人去吧 No, you take someone else.
我很喜欢床而且很讨厌剧院 I really like bed and I really hate theatre.
好吧 Quite right.
但有哪个可怜虫在没事先约的情况下 But what kind of sad act is gonna be free on a Saturday night
周六晚上还有空的？ with no day's notice?
太精彩了 Bravo.
天啊，是夏绿蒂 - 谁？ Oh, my God. It's Charlotte. Who?
我的初恋 - 在哪里？ It was my first love. Where?
出口标示那里 There. Under the "exit" sign.
那个老女人？ - 不，是那个金发正妹 - The old woman? - No, not the old woman. The astonishing blonde.
黑发那个？ - 不，是金发 The one with the dark hair? No, blonde.
我说金发就是金发 Blonde means blonde hair, doesn't it?
…跳下舞台 Off the stage.
好，你留在这里，别动！ Okay, you stay there. I mean it, stay!
我们似乎曾经像这样站在这里聊天…
夏绿蒂 Charlotte.
天啊，提姆 Oh, my God. Tim.
能见到你太开心了 How fabulous to see you.
我… Wow. I...
这是我女友蒂娜 This is my girlfriend Tina.
不会吧 No. Oh!
那真是好极了，你好，蒂娜 That is so brilliant. Well, hello, Tina.
为什么说好极了？ Why is it brilliant?
人生难免会留下一些创伤 Well, you know. There are certain moments in your life that scar you for life.
当年夏绿蒂拒绝我就是如此 Charlotte's rejection of me was one of those moments,
现在知道她有了你这位女友 but now I know she's got a "girlfriend," well,
我心里的重担总算可以卸下 that's just a huge burden suddenly lifted off my mind.
我可以重拾身为异性恋男人的自信 I can be a confident heterosexual all over again.
她不是我的“女友” Not that kind of girlfriend.
什么意思？ What?
你以为我是同性恋？ You think I'm gay?
没有 No.
当然不是，你指的是女性朋友嘛 No, of course not. No. It's girl friend.
对，没错，老天 Yes. No. Wow.
女生的朋友，当然是了 Yeah, friend who is a girl, which you so clearly are.
我得去找我男友了…我的男性朋友 I'm just gonna go and get my boyfriend, who is a boy...
天啊，提姆 Oh, my God. Tim.
见到你真开心，看看你 How lovely to see you. Look at you. Wow.
这是我女友蒂娜 This is my girlfriend Tina. Oh.
你好，蒂娜 Hello, Tina. Although you should be
你该注意一下你的说法 a little careful with that, by the way.
还是有很多古板的人 There are still quite a lot of us old fashioned types about
听到“女友”会以为你是女同志 who interpret "girlfriend" as meaning "gay."
你如果说蒂娜是你女友 So if you say that Tina's your girlfriend,
人家就会以为你是女同志 people will assume that you're "gay."
我是女同志没错 I am "gay".
是吗？ Are you?
你对女同志有什么意见？ Do you have a problem with that?
哪有，我超爱的 No, I don't. I love that stuff.
我得去… I'm just gonna...
我刚看到三年前的夏天… I've just seen the girl who broke
…让我心碎的女孩 my heart three summers ago.
去打声招呼 - 不了 Let's go say hello.
过去的就让它过去，走吧 No. Best let sleeping dogs lie. Come on.
这是我一生中最棒的夜晚 Best night of my life.
我一直很喜欢这一带 I always love this area.
人来人往的，图画都色彩缤纷 It's so bustling and I mean those pictures, full of colour.
我每次来心情都很好… Just makes me so happy when I'm round here, all the colour...
提姆 Tim.
夏绿蒂！ - 见到你真开心 Oh, Charlotte! Tim, how lovely to see you.
怎么这么巧 What a surprise.
这是我女友蒂娜 Wow. Sorry. This is my girlfriend, Tina.
她是女同志 - 闭嘴 She's gay. Shut up.
你好，蒂娜 - 看看你！ Hello, Tina. Look at you!
真没想到你会离开康瓦尔 It just never even occurred to me you existed outside of Cornwall.
我们正要去吃晚餐 We're about to go and get dinner,
有空应该要约一下 but it would be great to hang out sometime.
当然 - 帮我问候小凯，她好吗？ Yeah, sure. I'd love that. Send my love to little Kit Kat. How is she?
还可以，但在伦敦生活没那么容易 She's okay. She's not finding London totally easy actually.
吉米说有时候还会和她见面 Right. Well, Jimmy says he sees her sometimes.
真的？什么时候的事？ Really? Since when?
他们总是藕断丝连 You knew there was always something there.
抱歉，你是？ Sorry, you are?
我很好，谢谢 - 她在问你的名字 Very well, thank you. Well, she means your name.
我叫罗杰 - 不是啦 Oh. Roger. No, it's not.
不对，我叫罗瑞 No, it's not. It's Rory.
很高兴认识你，罗瑞 Nice to meet you, Rory. Yeah.
抱歉，我们得走了 Right. Sorry, we should get going.
很开心见到你，我们再约 - 好的 It was really great to see you. I'll see you soon. You, too. Yeah.
再见 Bye.
天啊，她好美 God, she is beautiful.
太美了，跟她上床一定爽死 She's so beautiful, if you had sex with her, you'd die. You'd just die.
打开她的衬衫看到她的胸部 You'd open her shirt, see her breasts
眼睛一定会爆开 and your eyes would explode.
你会瞎着眼跟她上床，然后死而无憾 You'd have to have sex with her blind. And then you'd die.
她并没给我电话 You notice she didn't give me her number...
我叫蒂娜自己去吃晚餐，你饿不饿？ I told Tina to go have dinner on her own. Are you hungry?
当然饿 - 太好了 Yeah. Of course. Great.
再见，罗杰 Bye, Roger.
再见了 Oh. Yeah, excellent.
再次谢谢你邀我，加油 Thanks again for the play. Triumph.
想去哪？ Where do you wanna go?
看你想去哪 Well, wherever you like really.
…我比不上 I can't compete.
你知道吗？ You know,
我开始觉得我们有点浪费掉那个暑假 I'm starting to think we slightly wasted that summer holiday.
如果能回到过去 If we could travel back in time,
说不定我不会拒绝你 maybe I wouldn't have said no.
我… I'm...
我就住在附近 I'm just staying round the corner.
你能陪我走回去吗？ Can you walk me home?
好啊 Yeah.
可以吗？ - 当然可以 Yeah? Yeah, of course, yeah.
到了 Well, here we are.
里面… It's a lot nicer
…比较舒服 inside.
我想也是 I'm sure it is.
那就… - 那就… So... So...
那就… So...
那就… So,
很开心… lovely
…见到你，夏绿蒂 to see you, Charlotte.
很愉快的夜晚，但我得… What a night. Total joy, but I've gotta
…回去了 get back
因为我现在有一件重要的事要做 because there's something very important that I have to do. Right now.
对不起
醒醒 Wake up. Mmm...
醒醒 - 什么事？ Wake up. What?
玛丽 Mary.
你愿不愿意…嫁给我？ Would you like to marry me? Shh.
别那么自私，我在睡觉，讨厌 Don't be so selfish, I'm sleeping. It's bad.
好吧 Right.
还真顺利 That went very well.
醒醒 Wake up.
什么事？ What?
醒醒，我们来聊聊 Wake up. Come and have a chat.
为什么？ Why?
我有一件重要的事要问你 I've got something important to ask you.
不能明天再问吗？ Can't it wait till morning?
不行 Not really.
但我睡得正舒服 But I'm so comfy.
我刚做了一场最美的梦 I was having the loveliest dream.
那是什么？ What is it?
怎么会有音乐？ Why is there music on?
和我要问你的事有关 It's got something to do with what I want to ask you.
等等 Wait a minute.
这么浪漫的音乐 Romantic music.
一个男人要问重要的问题 Guy with important question.
你该不会跪着吧？ Are you on your knees?
还真的跪着 On his knees.
你是看戏看得太无聊 Were you so bored in the play you decided
才决定跑来跟我求婚吗？ to ask me to marry you afterwards?
可以这么说 Huh? Something like that.
就是这样 Yeah. Exactly that.
我想问… In fact,
…你愿意嫁给我吗？ will you marry me?
现在有答案吗？ Any thoughts on the answer?
“愿意”，“不愿意” "Yes?" "No?"
还是“滚开，废物”? "Get out of my life, loser." They're all possible.
我想答案是… I think I'll go for
“愿意” "yes."
谢谢你开口 Thank you for asking me.
也谢谢你没有摆出大阵仗 And thank you for not going for one of those melodramatic proposals
叫一堆人来助阵 with lots of people around.
我讨厌有其他人在 I hate other people.
我也是 Me, too.
我去把收音机关掉 I'm just gonna turn off the radio.
好，关掉吧 Okay. Good idea.
谢了各位，抱歉，她有点累 Thanks, guys. Sorry, she's a bit tired.
不过… But
很感谢你们帮忙，你们可以走了 we really appreciate it. Can you go?
这里真漂亮 That's so beautiful.
我们也许不住在同一个房间 I don't think we'll be staying in the same room, somehow.
真的吗？ Oh, really?
他们如果邀你喝茶就拒绝 Oh, if they offer you tea, just say no.
妈，这位是玛丽 Hello. Mum, this is Mary.
玛丽！ - 你好 Mary! Hi.
天啊，你真漂亮 - 没有啦，其实… Good Lord, you're pretty. Oh, no, it's just
我擦了很多睫毛膏和口红 I've got a lot of mascara and lipstick on.
我瞧瞧 Let's have a look.
真的耶，很好 Oh, yes. Good.
女孩子太漂亮也不好 It's very bad for a girl to be too pretty.
她会没有幽默感或个性 It stops her developing a sense of humour. Or a personality.
喝茶吗？ Tea?
好啊 - 整天要耗在这了 I'd love a cup of tea. Oh, Christ, that's the whole day gone.
她是贵宾，别用有裂缝的杯子 She's a very special guest. Cup without the crack.
打水漂 - 他还这么高的时候就在打了 Oh. Skipping stones. They've been doing this since he was about this high.
你有什么缺点？我是说小弱点 And what are your faults? I mean, little weaknesses.
我… I, uh...
我很没有安全感 Well, I'm very insecure.
还好啊 Sweet.
有时候脾气很糟 Okay. I've a very bad temper sometimes.
这很重要，不然要怎么让男人听你的 Crucial. How else are you gonna get a fella to do what you want?
当然还有… And, of course, I have...
我对你儿子特别没辙 - 我也是 I have a weakness for your son. So do I.
最好别让他知道，他会得意忘形 But best not to tell him. Don't want him getting cocky.
没有球我打得比较好 Pow! I'm so good without the ball. Pow!
你觉得她怎么样？ What do you think of her?
在我心中地位比你高了 I like her more than you already.
我都忘记这个了 Oh, look, I'd forgotten this.
吉米方塔纳的“大千世界” Jimmy Fontana Il Mondo.
意大利歌手史上最棒的唱片 Greatest record ever recorded by an Italian
虽然他的发型很鸟 who looks like he's got a dead badger on his head.
而且你有唱片 - 没错！ And you've got the album. Yes!
瞧他那副眼镜！ Check out those specs!
我们继续打！来 Come on, on with the game! Right.
真是一场精釆绝伦的比赛 And what an extraordinary game this is.
史上第一对… For the first time a father and son
…在世界桌球总决赛厮杀的父子档 are playing each other in the World Table
而且他们都不是中国人 Tennis Final and neither of them are Chinese.
前世界冠军大展身手对抗儿子 Tremendous play from the old World Champion and his son,
他是首位不掩饰红发的英国桌球选手 the first openly ginger British table tennis player
但有迹象显示这位年轻人快不行了 but there are signs the youngster's beginning to crack.
他的眼中充满泪水 There are tears in his eyes.
才没有！ - 很快就会有了！ There are not! There soon will be!
我不知道你在家 Hey! I didn't know you were here.
我是临时决定回来一下 Yeah. I just popped down for a while.
这样啊 Okay.
工作怎么样了？ What about the job?
你回家多久了？ So how long have you been here?
几个星期 Couple of weeks.
这么久了！那你在伦敦… Gosh! So, life in London...
糟透了 Horrid.
好吧 Okay.
玛丽有来吗？ Is Mary here?
有 Yes.
她在哪？ - 楼下 Where? Downstairs.
温柔点 You be gentle.
温柔点！ Be gentle!
小心！ Oh! Oh, careful!
我也很开心见到你 Yeah, nice to see you, too.
我本来想给你一个好印象 I'm trying to make a good impression...
你给我很好的印象 Yeah, you make a good impression.
对不起 Right, sorry. Sorry.
我有件重要事情要宣布 I've got an important announcement to make.
真令人兴奋 - Exciting. - Mmm.
我们思考过后决定结婚了 We've decided, after a little bit of thought, to get married.
那真是太好了 That's wonderful news.
你要跟谁结婚？ Who are you getting married to?
坐在你旁边的玛丽 To Mary. Over there.
还好老天保佑 Oh, thank God for that.
如果是另一个女生可就尴尬了 Jolly embarrassing if it had been another girl. Imagine that.
真替你们高兴 We're so pleased.
对了，还有… Oh, no, sorry. Uh... Yeah.
顺带一提，婚礼很快就会举行 By the way, the wedding will be quite soon
因为宝宝也快出来了 because we're having a baby, too.
你怀孕了？ - 是的 You're pregnant? Yes.
孩子的爸是谁？ Who's the father?
应该是提姆 Well, Tim, I hope.
还好老天保佑 Thank God for that. Jolly awkward
如果是另一个男的就惨了 if it had been another fellow.
我们今晚就得决定好 We have to decide tonight.
决定什么？ - 所有东西 What? Everything.
有关婚礼你唯一决定好的事… The only thing you've decided about our
…就是在我走红毯时… wedding is that I'm coming down the aisle
要放一个怪咖意大利歌手唱的… to the sound of some Italian weirdo
…叫“大千世界”的歌 singing a song called Il Mondo.
很棒的歌 - 我已经说不行了 Excellent song. To which I've said a definitive "no."
这样好了 So here's the deal.
你每做好一个决定我就脱一件衣服 I will take off one item of clothing for every decision you make.
这样才对嘛，小姑娘 Okay. You have my attention, young lady.
开始喽… Right, um,
你想在哪里结婚？ where would you like to get married?
家里，其他地方都不要 Home. I'd hate anywhere else.
好 Okay.
这真好玩 - 很好 Oh, my God. Good.
牧师要请谁？ Who should the priest be?
有一口黄牙和超粗一字眉的当地牧师 It'll have to be the local bloke with yellow teeth and the massive unibrow.
好 Okay.
那就决定是海格了 That's a lock for Hagrid.
伴郎呢？ - 糟糕 Best Man? Damn.
伴郎人选，快 Best Man. Now.
太难了，怎么挑都不对 Oh, no, this is so hard. It's lose-lose, you know.
没被挑中的会记仇 You piss off all the ones you don't pick,
挑中的最后会闹翻… and you end up hating the one you do pick
因为他的致词会很烂，把场子搞砸 because he makes a bad speech and ruins the day.
你到底想不想看咪咪？ - 想啊 Do you wanna see these puppies or not? Yes, I do.
杰伊 - 你说了算 Jay. It's your choice.
他是挚友也是智障 - 他会毁了一切 He's my best friend, but he's a moron. Yeah, he will mess up everything.
罗瑞 - 你确定？ Rory. Sure?
不，哈利好了 - 就他了，来吧 No, Harry. Harry it is. Let's do this.
还是罗瑞，对不起 - 什么？你作弊 Oh, Rory. Sorry. What? That's such a cheat.
算了 Okay, fine.
蜜月去哪？ Honeymoon?
苏格兰的民宿 Bed and breakfast in Scotland.
苏格兰不值得我脱内裤 I am not taking my pants off for Scotland.
我们的钱就这么多，快把内裤脱了 But it's all we can afford. Take off your pants.
才不要 - 快脱！ I will not. Take off your pants!
我要去峇里島两周 - 先脱再说！ I want two weeks in Bali! Take off those pants!
你休假排了吗？ - 还没 Have you planned a break? No.
不会吧 Oh, no!
好有心
是你安排的吗？ Is that you?
不是我 It wasn't me.
歌是献给你的 It's for you.
糟糕，卡住了 - 我来，我来！ No, I'm caught! I've got it. I've got it!
帮我！ Help me!
干的好！ Yes!
大家跟我走！ Right, follow me!
天啊！ My gosh!
妈呀！ Oh, my God!
老天！ Oh, God!
太夸张了吧！ It's a joke!
这给你 Here.
快进来 Yes, come on.
这边请 This way.
天啊！ Oh, my God!
大家好 Hello,
我是罗瑞 I'm Rory.
当提姆请我当伴郎的时候 When Tim asked me to be his Best Man,
我怕得要死 I was terrified.
我想说最好能找一本有关致词的书 So I thought best thing is to find
就是这一本 a book about speeches. And here it is.
它说要想一个好笑事件 And it says think of really funny anecdotes.
刚好工作上发生很搞笑的故事 And there is a very hilarious story, actually from work.
那个案子很复杂 It was quite a complicated case based on an issue of
和离婚后财产所有权的… cross-amortisation of ownership of
…跨摊销议题有关 post-divorce properties and, um...
我先解释一下背景，被告… Let me just explain the context. The Defendant...
当提姆请我以伴郎身分致词时 When Tim asked me to do his Best Man speech,
我的第一个反应是… my immediate reaction was,
“你要付我多少钱？王八蛋” "How much are you gonna pay me, you little shit?"
“我才不免费替人写东西” "I don't write for free, you know."
这几个是当时可能成为他女友的人 These were the girls available to him at that time.
这是他跟每一个人的进展 "Hello, girls." And this is how far he got with each of them.
我来解释号码的意思，5是有被吹过 Let me explain the code. 5, blowjob.
8是完全插入… 8, full penetrative...
…敬这位… ...and so a toast
…发型很丑但娶到最棒新娘的男人 to the man with the worst haircut but the best bride in the room.
各位先生女士，敬提姆与玛丽 Ladies and gentlemen, Tim and Mary.
敬提姆与玛丽 Tim and Mary.
在说我们 That's us.
真希望我有说“我爱你” I wish I'd said "I love you."
爸，你有 You did, Dad.
用隐喻的方式 It was implied.
在结婚当天用隐喻的很不够力 I'm not sure "implied" is good enough for a wedding day, are you?
别回到过去，没关系的 No, don't do it, it's fine.
我很喜欢你的致词，真的不必回去 I'm so happy with it as it was. You really don't have to.
我想怎么做就怎么做，年轻人 I'll do what I wanna do, young man.
失陪一下 Will you excuse me for just one moment?
等一下我可能会告诉你们 ...later on I may tell you about
提姆做为男人和打桌球时的很多缺点 Tim's many failings as a man and as a table tennis player.
但是… But,
首先我想说一件… important first to say the one
…很重要的事 big thing, I've only loved
我一生只爱过三个男人 three men in my life.
我父亲冷若冰霜 My dad was a frosty bugger so that
所以戴斯蒙舅舅雀屏中选 only leaves dear Uncle Desmond,
也不能少算歌王比比金 B.B. King, obviously,
再来就是这位年轻人 and this young man here.
我只给要结婚的人一个建议 I'd only give one piece of advice to anyone marrying.
大家到头来都差不多 We're all quite similar in the end.
我们都会变老，不断讲一样的故事 We all get old and tell the same tales too many times.
但结婚就要找一个… But try and marry someone
…善良的人 kind.
我儿子是个善良的人 And this is a kind man
心地很好 with a good heart.
我一生中没几件… I'm not particularly proud
…特别值得骄傲的事，但我很自豪… of many things in my life, but I am very proud
…能有这样的儿子 to be the father of my son.
抱歉打扰你，可以帮我签名吗？ I'm so sorry to disturb you, but I wonder if I could have your autograph.
不可以 No. No.
这是婚礼好吗？我是来庆祝真爱的 I'm at a wedding, for God's sake. I'm here to celebrate true love not
才不要在一张烂纸上签草书 scribble my illegible signature on stupid
让你在拍卖网站上乱卖 bits of paper that you can flog on eBay
好在下次婚礼时戴个能看的帽子 so that at the next wedding you can wear a less hideous hat.
这位是梅伊姑姑 I see you've met my Aunt May.
要命，大家怎么不挂个名牌 Oh, God. People should wear name tags.
下一个就轮到你了，小凯 You next, Kittle Kattie.
我不确定，戴斯蒙舅舅 I don't know, Uncle D.
男生都很糟 Boys aren't very nice.
是这样吗？亲爱的 Aren't they, darling?
至少我没遇到好的 Not in my experience.
他们要怎样就怎样，又不愿付出 They're always taking liberties, not giving much back in return.
这很好吃 - 真的？ It's yummy. Yeah?
我喜欢你说“好吃”的样子 I like the way you say 'yummy.'
你会不会希望选好一点的天气结婚？ Do you wish we'd picked another less wet day?
不会 No.
完全不会 Not for the world.
好加在 Phew.
另一个阶段开始了 And so it begins.
我们会经历各式各样的日子 Lots and lots of types of days.
会很有趣！ Fun!
小花 Posy.
就叫小花 Posy she is.
世界上最美的女孩 The most beautiful girl in the world.
你想要爹地抱抱，我知道 You want your daddy. Yes, I know.
来 Yeah.
孩子的诞生总是让人措手不及 No one can ever prepare you for what happens when you have a child.
看着躺在怀里的宝宝 When you see the baby in your arms
你就知道自己责任重大 and you know that it's your job now.
还得面对随之而来的爱… No one can prepare you for the love
…和恐惧 and the fear.
她真可爱 Oh, she's lovely.
你刚出生时有够丑 You were such an ugly baby.
比较像黑猩猩不像宝宝 More chimpanzee than child.
我记得第一眼看到你 I remember the first time I saw you,
就很庆幸伦敦动物园很近 I thanked God we were in driving distance of London Zoo.
让我抱抱这小东西 Come on, hand over the little bugger,
看她会不会蹦蹦跳跳 let's see if she bounces.
这样真的… - 她当然会了 Are we sure... KIT KAT: Yeah, she definitely will bounce.
你瞧 - 她什么都做得到 Oh, look. She can do anything.
看看她 - 你好 Look. Hello.
真惹人疼 Sweetheart.
你会感受到你爱的人对宝宝的爱 No one can prepare you for the love people you love can feel for them.
也要适应没有小孩的朋友冷淡的态度 And nothing can prepare you for the indifference of friends who don't have babies.
要不要让杰伊叔叔抱抱？ Do you wanna go to Uncle Jay, huh?
不用，谢谢，真的没关系 No, thanks, it's fine. It's great.
你会很惊讶的发现自己突然得… And it's a shock how quickly you have to move
…搬到一个自己根本负担不起的新家 to a new place you completely can't afford.
看看这是什么 - 你看这是谁！ Look what we found. Look who it is!
亲爱的！ - 对不起 Honey! Sorry.
突然间穿越时空已经没那么必要了 Suddenly, time travel seems almost unnecessary,
因为生活中的每个细节都会带来喜悦 because every detail of life is so delightful.
它叫什么名字？ What's his name?
荷瑞斯 - 这样啊 Horace, I think. Of course it is.
人家跟我说当教父有一点很重要 Only one important thing for a godfather, I'm told,
绝对不要送比小孩小的礼物 never bring a present smaller than the child.
闭嘴，该死的家伙 Oh, shut up, you smug bastard.
别担心，我什么都没带 Don't worry, I didn't bring anything at all.
她还小，根本不会知道 She'll never know. Hasn't got a brain yet.
真没想到你会来，哈利 I didn't expect to see you here, Harry.
你应该对小孩的派对没兴趣 Children's party's not exactly your style.
不，玛丽，我是被骗来的 No, Mary, I was tricked.
他们说有免费的酒可以喝 I was told there would be free booze.
你也知道我讨厌小孩 I hate kids, as you know.
小凯怎么还没来？ Where's Kit Kat, by the way?
不知道，她说大概三点会到 I don't know, she said she'd be here around 3:00.
我们还特别准备了紫色杯子蛋糕 And you know we got purple cupcakes for her especially.
她来了！ - 说人人到，一定是她 Here she is! Speak of the devil, that will be her.
我们等小凯姑姑来再开始 We'll wait till Aunty Kit Kat gets here.
吉米 Hey. Jimmy.
我妹呢？ Where's my sister?
她不是已经来了 - 她还没到 Thought she was here. No, she hasn't arrived.
那不太妙 That's not good.
什么意思？ What does that mean?
我们今天早上吵了一架 Um... We had an argument this morning.
是小事，但她喝了很多酒 Over nothing, but she'd been drinking, so...
然后跑出去把车开走 And then she ran out to get the car to come here and
我要她在这里碰头 I told her to meet me here so...
巴兹鲁曼有一首歌叫“防晒油” There's a song by Baz Luhrmann called Sunscreen.
他说担心未来 He says worrying about the future
就跟以为嚼口香糖就能解代数一样 is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum.
人生真正的大麻烦 The real troubles in your life
是你怎么担心都想像不到的 will always be things that never crossed your worried mind.
怎么回事？ What happened?
我们吵了一架 We had a fight.
然后… And,
…我可能不是很清醒 maybe I wasn't completely sober.
她还好吗？ - 不好 How is she? Not good.
她是什么时候从哪里离开的？ When did she leave you? From where?
告诉我确切的时间地点 I want it exact. Exact time. Exact address.
我们到了，抱歉抱歉 Here we are. Sorry, sorry.
进去吧 Come on.
天啊 Ah, God.
她来了 Hi. There she is.
这里有没有一个小宝宝？ Does a small baby live here?
有，她在楼下，很兴奋 Yes, and she's so excited. She's downstairs.
生日快乐，小花 Happy birthday, Posy,
对不起，我得去接小凯 I'm sorry. I had to pick up Kit Kat.
我以为她要自己开车 - 她开不了 I thought she was gonna drive herself. Turns out she couldn't.
她还好吗？ - 待会再谈 She okay? Later.
我很担心小凯 I'm worried about Kit Kat.
我知道 Yeah. I know.
我们在喝茶的时候她在喝酒 She was drinking wine while we were drinking tea.
吉米对她并不好 And Jimmy wasn't nice to her.
她还不屑吃紫色杯子蛋糕 And she spurned the purple cupcakes.
我们得想办法解决这件事 We have to do something to fix it.
是啊 Yeah.
不过你要知道… But, you know,
如果要解决也得让她自己去解决 if it's gonna be fixed, I think she probably has to do it herself.
或许是吧 Maybe.
又或许不是 Maybe not.
亲爱的，到底怎么了？ My darling. What's happened?
你是世界上最好的人 You're the best person in the world.
对我来说跟老婆一样重要，我不懂 You're top equal with my wife. I don't get it.
可能我就是… Maybe, just maybe,
…天生的失败者 I'm the faller.
每个家庭都会出一个失败者 Every family has, like, someone who falls,
总是达不到目标又跌跌撞撞 who doesn't make the grade, who stumbles,
把人生搞得一团糟 who life trips up.
或许我就是那个人 Maybe I'm our faller.
不是 No.
你不是 No.
好，我告诉你一个秘密 Okay. I'm gonna tell you a secret.
你要保证守口如瓶 And you have to promise to keep it.
我们总是有秘密 - 有吗？ We've always kept secrets. We have?
你要保证绝对绝对… You promise you won't ever, ever, ever,
绝对绝对…不说出去 ever, ever, ever, ever tell?
好 Yes.
我可以穿越时空 I can travel in time.
我们为什么要站在楼梯置物间？ Why are we standing in the cupboard under the stairs?
因为我们要回到过去 Because we're gonna go back in time
你要做出不一样的决定 and you're gonna do some things differently.
我喜欢你这么滑稽 I love it when you're funny.
抓住我的手，闭上眼 Grab my hand. Close your eyes.
天啊！我的天啊！ Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
这是搞什么鬼东西 Oh, my arsing God in a box.
你开什么玩笑？ You're kidding?
什么时候不回，回到这个最烂的派对 I can go anywhere in time and you bring me back to the worst party of all time.
没错，出去吧 'Fraid so. Let's go.
我们有正事要做 - 什么事？ We've got work to do. What work?
让你不要和吉米金卡德相遇 Making sure you do not meet Jimmy Kincade.
快，过来 Quick, in here.
但他就要爱上我了！ - 这次不会 But he's about to fall in love with me! Not this time he isn't.
这位漂亮正妹是谁？你是珍妮佛吧？ Who's the pretty looking girl? It's Jennifer, isn't it?
我是 - 太好了！ Yeah. Wild!
我喜欢你的裙子，珍妮佛 - 谢谢 I like your skirt, Jennifer. Thank you.
我懂了 Right, I get it.
他就算没遇见我也会跟其他女生上床 If he hadn't met me, he would have just had sex with someone else.
要防患未然是吧？ Nip it in the bud, eh?
吉米 Excuse me, Jimmy.
抱歉 - 我认识你吗？ Sorry. Do I know you?
认识 Yeah, you do.
我们可熟了，对不起 Very well. Sorry.
我一开始就该这么做 And this is what I should have done right at the start.
新年快乐，各位，新年快乐 Happy New Year, everybody. Happy New Year.
快点回置物间 And back to the cupboard.
太猛了！ Amazing!
现在会怎样？ - 谁知道 What happens now? God knows.
我希望你可以从此远离没种的臭男人 What I'm hoping is that from this moment on
因为他们又臭又烂 you avoid the sleazy bad guys because they're sleazy and bad.
干嘛这么严肃？ When did you get so serious?
因为我怕我可能会失去你 Since it occurred to me that I might lose you.
做好心理准备，你可能会不习惯 Brace yourself, this could be weird.
事情会有所变化 Things will have changed.
我的天啊 Oh, my God.
怎么了？ - 杰伊 What? Jay.
那个杰伊？ - 对 Jay Jay? Yes.
我发现他很迷人，天啊 And he's adorable. Oh, my God.
好 Right,
来吧 let's do this.
你们两个快过来 Come on, you two.
妈妈刚开了一包新饼干 Mum's just cracked open a packet of biscuits.
有件事要请你帮忙 - 我知道是什么 I've got something in mind for you.
我知道 - 吃个饼干再过来帮我 I know what you're gonna say. Have a biscuit and come and help me.
剩下的让戴斯蒙舅舅来 But leave the rest for Uncle D.
把这边整理一下就好 It's just tidying really.
你还好吗？真想你 You all right? I missed you. Yeah.
你妈要我去花园帮忙 - 是喔 Your mum wants me to do some gardening. Okay.
把乱七八糟的都整理一下 It's tidying up, it's all a bit out of control.
枯萎的就除掉 Anything that looks dead, out.
我们要找的是这个，全部找出来 This is what we're looking for. Okay? All this.
枯掉的 - 你看 Dead stuff. See this.
虫都把它们咬碎了 They've torn them to shreds, haven't they?
进行得怎么样？ - 非常令人满意 How did everything go? Immensely satisfactory.
真开心，我想听所有细节 I'm so happy. Oh! I wanna hear all about it.
你能帮忙煮晚餐吗？ Will you do dinner for us because there's
我得在6点前完成一件事 something I have to do before 6:00
不然会被开除 or I'll get fired?
还有什么比煮饭更开心的 Yeah. I can't think of anything I'd love to do more.
世界上最棒的人在哪里？ Okay, where is the most fabulous person in the world?
让爸爸来喂你大口吃碎碎的食物！ Come to your dad and get mashed up food shoved into your mouth!
你好，小男孩 Hello there, little boy.
你… You just
…在这待着，我马上回来 wait there and I'll be back in a minute.
爸，能不能跟你谈一下？ Dad, can I have a quick word?
当然 Yeah. Sure.
我不能回去而不影响小孩，对吧？ I can't go back past the birth again, can I?
不能，我早该告诉你的 No. I should have mentioned that.
小孩出生后就要慎选回去的时空 You're okay till it comes out but the exact
某个时间点的某个精子… sperm at the exact moment got you this
…会带来特定的宝宝 particular baby,
就算是一点点的不同 so if you do anything the tiniest bit
都会让你生出不同的小孩 different, you'll have a different child.
所以昨天以前发生过的事 将从此消失？ So, every day up 'til yesterday is as it will always be? Lost?
不只你的，其他人也一样消失 Just like for everyone else.
好，很有意思 Okay. Interesting.
真严格，爸，我爱你，我得走了 Tough. I love you, Dad. I've gotta go.
你们回家吧 - 不行 - Go home. - No.
在确定这种事不会再发生之前 We're not leaving this room until we find
我们是不会走的 a way of making sure this never happens again.
你们回去好不好？ Will you go now?
我得离开吉米对吧？ I have to leave Jimmy, don't I?
断个干净 For good.
还有… And
我该戒酒了 I have to stop drinking.
也不该一直换工作 And stop leaving jobs.
我还要跟人很好… And I have to go out with someone
…但无聊的男生约会 nice and boring.
好人不一定很无聊 And, you know, nice isn't necessarily boring.
像谁？ Like who?
麦特戴蒙？ Matt Damon?
好吧 Okay.
我会和麦特戴蒙约会 I'll go out with Matt Damon.
你最近有和杰伊见面吗？ Tell me, have you seen Jay recently?
你朋友杰伊？头发抓很高的杰伊？ Your Jay? What, sticky-up hair Jay?
长得像芝麻街的杰伊？ Looks a bit like a muppet Jay?
没错 Yes.
我突然想到他 He just popped into my head.
他暗恋你很久了 He's always had a crush on you.
真的？ - 真的 Really? Yeah.
太诡异了！ Weird!
我想约他吃晚餐，你有空吗？ Thinking of asking him to dinner. Are you free?
可能吧，但我得先整理一下仪容 Might be. Might have to freshen up a bit first.
是啊，你现在丑死了 Yeah. You look shit.
乔安娜 - 你们终于回来了 Joanna. Oh, thank Christ you're back.
简直是恶梦一场 - 我知道，都没事了 It's been a total nightmare. I know. It's all fine anyway.
她在哪？ - 我人生中最可怕的夜晚 Where is she? It was the single worst night of my life.
小花在哪？ Where's Posy?
在这！ There she is! Hello!
亲爱的，你好吗？ Darling, how are you doing?
我们再生一个 Let's have another one.
死都不要 Oh, screw that. No.
很痛又会变胖，超级肥 That hurt and I got fat. Like fat-fat.
她只有胖一点点，对吧 Got a little bit fat, didn't she.
跟妈咪说你想要妹妹 Tell Mummy you want a sister.
不，跟爹地说当独生女很好 No. Tell Daddy you're happy being an only child.
幸好我们还年轻也很随性 Fortunately we are young and careless and
所以很快的就变成了一家四口 it wasn't long before there were four of us.
太惊人了，只有三岁的雷小花 And this is incredible. Posy Lake, only 3 years old,
即将打破女子十米奥运纪录 is about to break the women's 10 metre Olympic record.
要破纪录了，他们来了 They're gonna do it. And here they are,
破纪录了！太精彩了 they've done it! Fantastic.
真厉害，你太强了 That was brilliant. You're so good.
睡得还真熟 Sleeping right through all that.
你能帮我吗？我好紧张 Can you help me? I'm so nervous.
我该穿什么去和畅销作家吃饭？ What do I wear for dinner with our bestselling author?
等我解决掉这些小怪物就马上上去 Let me finish up with the monsters and I'll come right up.
好，谢谢 Great. Thank you.
继续画 Go again.
这件怎么样？ Okay. How about this?
正翻了，任务完成 That's gorgeous. Job done. Yeah.
不，认真一点 No. Take it seriously. It's...
我不知道，不，不好看 I don't know. No, I hate it.
没错 - 很乏味而且… Yeah. It's boring and
…让我看起来很笨重 makes me look kind of lumpy.
你说得对，乏味又笨重，很难看 No, you're right. It is boring and lumpy. I hate it.
这件呢？ Okay. What about this?
太美了，就穿这件 Gorgeous. We did it.
不，太露了 No, it's too breasty.
会吗？ Is it? Okay.
不会太露啊 It's not too breasty.
不，我不能穿这双高跟鞋 No. I'm not wearing these heels.
看起来像妓女 I look like a prostitute.
那就别穿 - 但这样腿会很短 Not high heels, then. But then we have the short legs problem.
你想看起来像妓女还是小矮人？ Well, do you want to look like a prostitute or a dwarf?
一次警告 Warning. That's a warning.
就这件了！ Yes!
不好 No.
绝对不行！ No!
这件我喜欢 Now that I like.
这件只是内搭裙，你很色耶 No, I'm just picking up the dress that this goes under. Such a bad boy.
这件呢？ - 不错啊 This one? Not bad.
还是这件？ Or this one?
故意考我是吧，明明就同一件 It's a trick question, isn't it? Same dress.
并不是！ No!
不是吗？ No?
好，我觉得这件不会太糟 Okay. I don't think this one's too bad.
对啊，很好看 Yeah, it's fabulous.
真的？ - 真的 Really? Yeah.
好，很好 Okay. Great. Good.
蓝色那件怎么样？ How about the blue one?
蓝色那件？ - 对 The blue one? Yeah.
你说乏味又笨重… The first one that you tried on that was boring and lumpy,
…但其实没这回事的第一件洋装？ but that wasn't actually boring and lumpy, that one?
对，你觉得哪一件比较好？ Yeah, which do you prefer?
我不知道，我只觉得要疯了 I don't know. I'm actually starting to go mad.
我想还是蓝色那件好了 I think I like the blue one. Okay. Yeah.
好，就穿这一件啰？ Okay. Okay, let's go with this one, then?
你看起来很美 You look amazing.
真的？ - 真的 Really? Yes.
好，谢谢 Okay, thanks.
真要命 Oh, God.
小花呢？ Where's Posy?
在楼下 I left her downstairs.
放原稿的房间门该不会是开着的吧？ Not leaving the door open to the room with the manuscript in it?
应该没有 I don't think so.
你看着我，看着我的眼睛 Look at me. Look me in the eye TIM: Mmm-hmm.
你说要怎么办，我的人生完蛋了 And talk me through this. Basically my life is over.
我出去一下两分钟就好，一分钟… I really need to go out for just like two minutes, maybe one.
不准！ Don't you dare!
不准接！你要我怎么办？ Don't you dare answer that! What am I gonna do?
我们应该接一下电话 I think that we should really answer the phone.
你敢接我就用电话杀了你 If you answer the goddamn phone, I will kill you with the phone.
我不接但我得出去一下 I won't answer the phone, but I do need to get out.
不准出去，不准出去 No, no getting out, no getting out. No.
好，不出去 Okay, right.
抱歉，麦凯文先生 Oh! Sorry, Mr McEwan.
你的书我们几乎看完了，但剩下的… We read most of your book but, you see, the rest of it was
…都被乱涂鸦或…绞碎了 coloured on or shredded.
是啊 Yeah.
我不知道小花会用这台机器 I had no idea Posy actually knew how to use
这点还满厉害的 that machine. In a way that's impressive.
你哪位？到底有什么事？ What is it? How can I help you?
是玛丽啊 Oh, Mary. Uh...
没事，一切都…对不起 No, everything... Sorry.
你儿子会解释 Your son will explain.
你妈打来的 It's your mother.
妈 Hi, Mum.
不，没关系，我们… No, no, it's okay. We'll...
我们会赶过去 We'll come straight down.
好，再见 Okay, bye.
亲爱的 - 妈，你还好吗？ Hello, darling. Mum. How are you?
想听实话？ - 当然 Honestly? Why not?
我已经气到快爆炸了 I am fucking furious.
没有你爸的人生真不知怎么过下去 I am so uninterested in a life without your father.
玛丽，我们来泡些茶 Mary. Come on, let's make some tea.
你还好吗？ - 很好 How are you? Yeah, I'm fine.
吃过了吗？ - 吃过了 Did you eat? Yes, of course.
戴斯蒙舅舅 Desmond.
你好吗？ - 很好，谢谢 How are you? I'm very well, thanks.
只是觉得有点热 Though a little hot.
我想你爸爸不怎么好 Your father, I think, is not so well.
是癌症 Cancer.
是的 Yes.
我很难过，提姆 I'm very unhappy about it, Tim.
你结婚那天你爸说他爱我 At your wedding he said he loved me.
他是说了 - 没错 He does. I know.
那是我人生中最美好的一天 That was the best day of my life.
但今天可能是最糟的 So this is probably the worst.
爸 Dad.
老天 Oh, for God's sake.
别连你也来了 Not you, too.
什么意思？ What?
小凯才刚哭哭啼啼的来，现在换你 Well, Kit Kat's just rolled up blubbing her eyes out and now you're here.
妈都跟你们说了什么？ What's Mum been saying?
事实 - 好吧 The truth. Yeah, well,
除此之外 apart from that?
病可能是抽烟害的，但我不能回去改 It may have been the smoking but I couldn't
因为这是你们出生前就发生的事 undo that as it was before you were all born.
而且要不是我抽烟那么性感 And anyway, your mother definitely wouldn't have gone out with me
你妈也不会跟我约会 if I hadn't been such a sexy smoker.
我已经尽快接受治疗，但还是太迟 I did get diagnosed as soon as possible, but it was too late.
我们还剩多少时间？ How long have we got? You know,
可能… it, it could be
…几年吧 years.
到底多久？ How long really?
只剩几星期了 Weeks, I'm afraid.
我们已经聊过同样的话题吗？ Have we had this conversation before?
有 Yeah.
发生了什么事？ What happened?
我让自己很失望 I rather let myself down.
我抱了你 I hugged you.
抱歉 - 如果穿越时空… Sorry. I think I just thought with the time thing...
不，我没说过这能解决问题 No, I never said we could fix things.
我从没这样说过 I specifically never said that.
人生是个大杂烩，对谁来说都一样 Life's a mixed bag, no matter who you are.
看看耶稣，他可是上帝的儿子 Look at Jesus. He was the Son of God,
但他后来变成什么样了 for God's sake, and look how that turned out.
我知道，但… I know, but
我有种上当的感觉 you must see I feel a bit cheated.
别这样，试着反过来想 Don't. In fact, feel the opposite.
只有能穿越时空的癌症病患 The only people who give up work at 50
才能在50岁时退休 are the time travellers with cancer who want
因为他想跟儿子多打几场桌球 to play more table tennis with their sons.
没错 Right.
一直都是如此？ So that's been the deal?
对不起打了电话给你们 I'm sorry we had to call.
病情突然急转直下 It's suddenly got very bad.
我有件很重要的事要告诉你 And I have something very important to tell you.
但先确认一下 Or, let me check,
你想听一个大秘密… do you want to know the big secret,
还是宁愿跟我一样自己发现？ or would you rather find it out for yourself like I did?
还有别的秘密？ Oh, Christ, there's another secret?
没那么吓人但重要多了 Less dramatic. Much more important.
这能力的最高境界 The real mothership.
我想知道，告诉我 No, go on. Tell me.
别卖关子了 Let's save some time.
爸告诉了我获得幸福的秘诀 And so he told me his secret formula for happiness.
其一是继续过着日复一日的平凡生活 Part one of the two part plan was that I should just get on with ordinary life,
和每个人一样 living it day by day, like anyone else.
这是我们目前的陈述 This is our current statement with a
改过的段落已标示出来 revised paragraph there, highlighted.
鲁博，你只能做到这个程度吗？ Rupert. Rupert, is that the best you can do?
当然不是，我们可以再改 No. Absolutely not. We can change that.
下一项 Item number two.
午安，先生，这边用还是带走？ Good afternoon, sir. Are you eating in or taking away today?
带走 - 没问题 Take away, please. Yeah? No problem.
您的餐点总共是4.24镑，谢谢 Lovely, that's 4.24 then, please, sir. Thank you kindly.
找您76便士 Lovely. And there's your change, sir. 76 pence change.
谢谢 - 谢谢光临 Thanks. Thank you. Hello there.
被告约翰维贝克的诈欺罪名… Do you find the Defendant, John Welbeck,
…成立或不成立？ guilty or not guilty of fraud?
不成立 Not guilty.
这是陪审团的一致裁决？ - 是的 And that is the verdict of you all? Yes.
谢谢，请坐 - 感谢老天 Thank you. You may be seated. Thank God.
宣判被告无罪 Let the Defendant be discharged.
所有人起立 Be upstanding in court.
关灯啰？ - 好 Lights out? Yeah.
难熬的一天 Tough day.
爸爸还有第二个建议 But then came part two of Dad's plan.
他要我以相同的方式重复过每一天 He told me to live every day again almost exactly the same.
第一次也许紧张焦虑而忽略的美好 The first time with all the tensions and worries that stop us noticing how sweet the world can be,
第二次都要好好体会 but the second time noticing.
好，爸 Okay, Dad.
我们再来试试 Let's give it a go.
我们目前的陈述是什么？ What's our statement at the moment?
就是这一份修改过的… This is it with the revised...
罗伯，这份报告可以看出你的程度 Robert, this does not pass.
你只能做到这个程度吗？ Is this the best you can do?
你们两个再给我好好想想 I'll leave you two to thrash this out.
“大混蛋”
午安，先生 - 午安 Good afternoon, sir. Good afternoon.
这边用还是带走？ - 带走 Are you eating in or taking away today? Take away, please.
需要袋子吗？ - 不需要 Would you like a bag? That's fine.
总共是6.23镑，祝你有美好的一天 Lovely. That's 6.23 then, please. And enjoy the rest of your day.
谢谢，再见 Thank you. Bye-bye.
你看看四周！ - 怎么样？ Look around you! What?
这大厅好漂亮 - 是啊 Isn't this room beautiful? Yeah.
走吧 Come on.
不成立 Not guilty.
太好了！ Fantastic!
所以今天其实没那么糟？ So not such a bad day after all?
对，很不错 No. It was pretty good really.
到头来是个美好的一天 Very good day, actually, as it turns out.
那我就放心了 Well, that's a relief,
本来想说你今天很惨的话… because if it had been a very bad day,
我会用爱爱来补偿你的 I thought I might have had to have had sex with you to make up for it.
晚安 Goodnight.
今天真的过得有够糟 It was a very, very bad day.
糟到不行 It went very, very badly.
我被炒鱿鱼了 I got fired from my job.
还杀了一个人 And then I killed a man.
真的是很糟糕的一天 That is a very bad day.
惨兮兮 - 是啊 It's terrible. Yeah.
史上最衰的一天 Like the worst day ever.
真抱歉 So sorry.
不过 有些日子很让人伤心… Some days, of course, though, you only want to go through once.
你还好吗？ You okay?
大家准备好了吗？ Right, are we ready for this?
怎么可能准备好，糟透了 'Course we're not. Hateful day.
给我一分钟 Just give me one minute.
写得太好了 This is so brilliant.
狄更斯很会想这些玩笑和插科打诨 Dickens is so good on actual jokes, actual gags.
你从哪里回来的？ Where have you come from?
在你的… It's the...
这样啊 Oh. Okay.
大日子 Big day.
谢谢你过来 Thanks for dropping in.
戴斯蒙舅舅的西装怎么样？ How's Uncle Desmond's suit?
完美无瑕 Oh, immaculate.
太好了 Excellent.
我有没有说过要放尼克凯夫的歌？ Did I mention I wanted the Nick Cave track?
都安排好了 It's taken care of.
谢了 Thank you.
要不要听我念一小段？ Can I just read you this one bit?
念吧，我时间多的是 Read away, I've got lots of time.
我想罗马人的鼻子… "I think the Romans must have aggravated
…一定让彼此相当恼怒 one another very much with their noses."
或许他们就是因此静不下来 "Perhaps they became the restless people they were in consequence."
总之，沃普赛先生的罗马式鼻子… "Anyhow, Mr Wopsle's Roman
…令我极为恼怒 nose so aggravated me..."
你觉得孩子怎么样？ What do you think about the kids?
什么怎么样？ What about them?
好像不太够 Not many of them, are there?
你说什么？ What?
只生两个够吗？ Well, I mean two?
已经比中国人被允许生的还多了 It's more than the Chinese are allowed.
我只是在想，或许… I just thought that maybe, you know,
是时候生个保险宝宝 - 什么？ it was time for the insurance baby. What?
以防其中一个孩子太聪明 In case one of them is really smart,
我们不希望另一个觉得自己很笨 we don't want the other one to feel stupid their whole life.
如果有第三个孩子 And if we had a third one,
就能凑两个快乐的笨蛋 then we could have two happy dummies.
你觉得怎么样？ What do you think?
这是我人生中最困难的决定 It was the toughest decision of my life.
应许未来即代表对父亲的永别 Saying 'yes' to the future meant saying 'goodbye' to my dad. Forever.
我们何不再等等？ Why don't we wait a bit?
当然可以 Absolutely.
没问题 You're right. Yeah.
现在可以了吗？ How about now?
还是现在？ Or now?
现在呢？ Now?
好 Yeah,
我答应 okay.
真的？ Really?
爸总是希望我们能有更多兄弟姊妹 Dad always wished there had been more of us.
所以… So...
总之试了也不一定会成功 Anyway, we might try and nothing happens.
没错 Exactly.
搞不好今晚就会生 Really could be tonight.
你不晓得我对去医院的路有多熟 Mmm. And you cannot believe the detail in which I know the route to the hospital.
等我一下 Will you excuse me for a sec?
我去楼下一趟 Just have to go downstairs. Mmm.
战况激烈的比赛来到了17比20 ...and it's 17-20 in this incredibly tight contest
由两位史上体能最优越的球员出战 being played by the two most physically perfect players in the history of the game.
观众都为年轻选手倾倒 The crowd, enchanted by the younger player, are seduced
也对老选手的辉煌战绩回味不已 by memories of the older player's illustrious past.
天啊，我赢了 Oh, my God, I've won.
我不知道几年没赢了 I haven't won in years.
你的球技终于变好了 You finally got good.
除了奥运金牌之外我还有什么奖品？ What's my prize? Apart from the Olympic gold medal, of course.
一个亲吻 - 亲吻？ A kiss will have to do. A kiss?
只有亲吻？ A kiss?
我懂了 Ah, I get you.
是最后一次了吧？ This is it, then?
是的 This is it.
我剩的时间不多了 It's my last bit of extra time.
宝宝就要出生了 The baby is completely on the way. Oh!
恭喜又做祖父了 Congratulations.
儿子 My son.
老爸 My dad.
有什么我能做的吗？ Is there anything at all I can do?
有什么你想做的吗？ Is there anything you want to do?
我不知道，倒是… I don't know. There is this
…有件事 one thing.
去散一下步吧 A quick little walk.
这完全违反规则 Totally against the rules, of course,
但只要我们不改变任何东西 but if we don't change a thing,
如果我们很小心，应该没关系 if we're very careful, it shouldn't do any harm.
会很棒 It would be nice.
我已经很努力在跑了… I'm really trying. I'm really trying.
打低一点 Get down low.
大惨败 Total defeat.
我好累 I'm tired.
谢了，老爸 Thanks, Dad.
我的故事差不多记录到此了 So I'm almost up-to-date with my story.
和所有家庭一样 As all families do,
活着的人得习惯亲人死后的日子 we got used to life after death.
一切都还过得去 And it was still fine.
生活会到原来的步调，日复一日 And things settled back into their traditional rhythms season after season,
跟平常没什么两样 and are much as they have always been.
我们也习惯了重拾快了的小凯 And we've got used to Kit Kat being happy again.
然后习惯她当妈妈这件事 And then we got used to her being a mum.
虽然她不熟练也不怎么安全 Albeit not a very good or even safe one.
最后… And in the end,
穿越时空让我学到了最后一课 I think I've learned the final lesson from my travels in time.
甚至超越了爸爸 And I've even gone one step further than my father did.
我去叫孩子起床 Okay, I'll do the kids.
别担心，我来就好 No, don't worry. I'll do them.
好，你去吧，懒惰虫 Yeah, you do them, you lazy bum.
事实上我已经不再回到过去 The truth is, I now don't travel back at all.
也不再重复过每一天 Not even for the day.
我把每一天都过得像是… I just try to live every day as if
…从未来回来回味一样 I've deliberately come back to this one day
…享受它…就当作是我拿特别… to enjoy it as if it was the full final day
…又平凡的生活的最后一天 of my extraordinary, ordinary life.
我并非…
…第一次就能把很多事情做好
别人也常对我这么说
现在我知道是所有走错的路
每一步的跌跌撞撞才让我来到这里
你自己下来了，真棒，感谢你 Hello, you're down already. That's great. Thank you so much for that.
进去吧 And in we go.
第一次见到你美丽脸庞的那一天 Posy? Posy!
之前我都在哪里呢？
现在我每天都见得到
而我知道…
我是…
最幸运的人
我们生活的每一天 We're all travelling through time together
都在一起穿越时空 every day of our lives.
我们能做的就是尽其所能… All we can do is do our best
…珍惜这一趟不凡的人生旅程 to relish this remarkable ride.
坐进去了
对对对… Yes, yes, yes...
我们如果继续走然后左转…
好，到时候见 Okay, I'll see you then.
再见 Bye-bye.
待会见 See you later.