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美国新星
我爱你 美国 I love you, Americal
你们也爱我 And you love mel
来自好莱坞 这里是吉米鸡毛秀 From Hollywood, it's Jimmy Kimmel Live!
今晚嘉宾玛丽亚·索菲亚·埃斯特拉达 Tonight, Maria Sofia Estrada.
玛丽亚·索菲亚 很荣幸 Well, Maria Sofia, it is a great pleasure
能请到你 to have you here. -
如果你没看过《年轻的拉里》她在里面抢尽了风头 If you haven't seen Young Larry, she steals the show.
我是说 绝对是 I mean, absolutely. -
没错 喔 That's right. Whoo!
你是个抢风头的人 You're a show stealer.
确实如此 是啊 我是 That's true. Yeah, I am.
显然 自信对你来说不是问题 And, obviously, confidence is not an issue with you.
那你觉得你为什么会得到这个角色 So why do you think you got this part?
很明显 我是最棒的 I was the best, clearly.
那么 节目里有很多即兴表演吗 So, is there a lot of improv on the show?
是的 有个剧本 Yes, there's a script,
但大部分台词都是我自己编的 but I make up most of my own lines,
加入我自己的想法 写得更好 put my own spin on the words, make it better.
*我有一个结构化的解决方案* *I have A structured settlement*
*但我现在需要现金* *But I need cash now*
*打电话给J.G 温特沃斯* *Call J. G. Wentworth*
*号码是877-现金 就现在* *877- CASH- NOW*
*我有一些巨额年金 但我现在需要现金* *I have some big annuities But I need cash now*
*打电话给J.G 温特沃斯* *Call J. G. Wentworth*
- *877 现金 就现在* -你能不能别再唱了 *877- CASH- NOW*- Could you just stop with that- -
别唱那个广告歌 stop with that commercial?
我不想听 I don't wanna hear that. -
-别在屋子里唱那首歌 -我想停下来 我停不下来 Don't sing that in the house. - I wanna stop. I can't stop!
好了 打住 Well, stop! -
燕麦牛奶呢 Where's the oat milk?
哦 就在这里 Oh, right here.
哦 我永远不会停止喝杏仁牛奶的先生 Oh, Mr. "I'm never gonna stop drinking almond milk. "
-是的 哦 -因为我跟你说过杏仁牛奶的事吗 Yeah. Oh. - Because what did I tell you about almond milk?
-是的 不 很好 -还记得吗 Yeah. No, good. - Remember again?
-是啊 不好 是啊 -我们说了什么 Yeah, bad. Yeah. - What did we say?
你知道 他们用在 You know, the water that they use in
在这个州给这些杏仁灌溉的水 in this state for these almonds
还有甲氧苄啶 在毒杀蜜蜂 and the methophexohexadine, they're killing the bees!
很抱歉你不开心拉里 I'm sorry you're unhappy, Larry,
但作为她的担保人 but as her sponsor,
我告诉你 她根本无法接受分手 I'm telling you, she simply cannot handle a breakup.
-要多久 -他们说 How long are we talking? - Well, they say no changes
在节目的前90天没有变化 但是 for the first 90 days in the program, but
厄玛的话 我是说 至少六个月 with Irma, I mean, minimum six months.
六个月 Six months?
我需要你答应我 拉里六个月 I need you to promise me, Larry. Six months.
-答应我 拉里 -还有根部真菌的增殖 Promise me, Larry. - And the proliferation of root fungus- -
是的 燕麦牛奶 Yeah, oat milk. -
就是这样 这才是应该喝的 That's it. That's the way to go.
哦 如果你在去高尔夫俱乐部的路上经过药房 Oh, if you go past the pharmacy on your way to the golf club,
这是给我治锤状脚趾的 this is for my hammer toe.
我不去高尔夫俱乐部 I'm not going to the golf club.
-不 但如果你去了 -不 但我不去 No, but if you do. - No, but I'm not going.
但你会比我先走 所以你能给我买这个吗 But you will go before I do, so would you get me these?
我不在乎它们是黑的 白的 还是特大号的 I don't care if they're black, white, extra- large.
* 我有一个结构化的解决方案* Oh, I have A structured settlement*
*但我现在需要现金* *But I need cash now *
*打电话给J.G 温特沃斯* *Call J. G. Wentworth*
*号码是877-现金 就现在* 女 877- CASH- NOW*
Siri 去沃夫斯格伦的方向 Siri, directions to Wolfsglen. -
去大灰狼旅馆的方向 Directions to Great Wolf Lodge.
不 Siri 沃尔夫斯格伦餐厅 No, Siri, Wolfsglen Restaurant.
我找到了一个选项 One option I see,
本尼迪克特峡谷的伍德花园用品 Wood's Garden Supply on Benedict Canyon.
Siri 韦斯特伍德的沃尔夫斯格伦餐厅 Siri! Wolfsglen Restaurant in Westwood.
我看到了一个选项 One option I see,
伯班克的伍尔西餐厅 The Woolsey Restaurant in Burbank.
不 不 不 你没在听 No! No, no, you're not listening!
我说的是韦斯特伍德的沃尔夫斯格伦餐厅 I said Wolfsglen Restaurant in Westwood.
狼窝是保护狼 A wolf's den is a habitat that provides wolves
-免受伤害的的栖息地 -不 你他妈的白痴 with protection from － No, you stupid fucking idiot!
是韦斯特伍德的沃尔夫斯格伦餐厅 It's Wolfsglen Restaurant in Westwoodl
我看到了一个选项 One option I see,
-杰·沃尔夫服装公司 -不 啊 你他妈的 Jay Wolf Clothing. No! Ah, you fuck!
沃尔夫斯格伦餐厅 Wolfsglen Restaurant!
对不起 我没明白 Sorry, I didn't get that.
我的上帝 你他妈的白痴 是沃尔夫斯格伦 你这个婊子 Oh, my God, you fucking moron! It's Wolfsglen, you cunt.
邦特蛋糕是一种在邦特平底锅中烘焙的蛋糕 Bundt cake is a cake that is baked in a Bundt pan.
不是邦特 啊 我说 你这个婊子 Not Bundt! Gah! I said, "You cuntl"
我说 你这个婊子 I said, "You cunt! "
-对不起 我没听懂 -我叫你婊子 Sorry, I didn't get that. - I called you a cunt!
我看到一个选择 内华达州卡森市 One option I see, Carson City, Nevada.
啊啊啊啊 闭嘴 Oh, shut up!
我看到一个选择 羊毛手套 One option I see, wool glove.
他妈的闭嘴 Shut the fuck up!
-对不起 我没听懂 -哦 去你的 Sorry, I didn't get that. - Oh, fuck you!
有人付钱让你 Somebody is paying you to just show up
在亚特兰大的一个生日派对上露个脸 at a birthday party in Atlanta.
-是的 我是说 太蠢了 -是啊 有钱人 Yeah. I mean, so stupid. - Yeah, rich guy.
他们付给他一大笔钱 They're paying him a ton of money.
-真的吗 -真可笑 Really? - Ridiculous.
这家伙是谁 他怎么知道你是谁 Who is this guy? How does he even know who you are?
他是来自非洲的富商 He's a wealthy businessman from Africa
他喜欢看《年轻的拉里》 who loves Young Larry.
是的 玛丽亚·索菲亚也会去的 Yeah, Maria Sofia's gonna be there, too.
哦 好吧 现在说得通了 卖点在她 Oh, well, now it makes sense. She's the draw.
对了里昂和我们一起去是因为他阿姨瑞伊 By the way, Leon's going with us 'cause his Auntie Rae
住在亚特兰大 lives in Atlanta.
-记得她吗 是吗 -我记得瑞伊阿姨 Remember her? Yeah? - I remember Auntie Rae.
代我向她问好 Send her my regards.
那你打算怎么做 讲些笑话什么的吗 So what are you gonna do, tell some jokes or something?
不 这很好 我很高兴你提起这件事 No, this is good. I'm glad you brought this up.
-我想把这个写进合同里 -当然 I want this in the. contract. - Surel
好吧 我不会做任何演讲 Okay. I'm not gonna do any speeches.
我不会表演任何单口相声 我不会说任何祝酒词 I'm not gonna do any stand- up. I'm not gonna do any toasts.
我会交际 我会握手 我表现亲切 I'll mingle, I'll shake hands, and I'll be cordial.
你知道如何表现得亲切吗 Do you even know how to be cordial?
我觉得会 我可以吗 I think so. Do I?
我估计你会 I would guess you do.
我不认为我能 但我会努力的 I don't think I can, but I'll try.
这里到底有吃的吗 Is the- - Are we getting any food here?
-真是难以置信 -我知道 This is unbelievable. - I know.
已经半个小时了 It's been half a fucking hour already.
我点了汤和三明治 I got soup and a sandwich.
-我能给你 -我的上帝 · Can I give you- - - My God.
-对不起 -是的 Excuse me. - Yeah.
我们已经在这里坐了半个小时了 We've been sitting here for a half hour
等待我们的食物 waiting for our food.
对此我很抱歉 你的服务员本尼 I'm so sorry about that. Your server, Benny,
他有点心不在焉 he's a little distracted.
他母亲几天前去世了 His mother passed away a couple of days ago.
几天前的事儿 他就来上班了 Few days ago and he comes into work?
-他来上班干什么 -如果他心烦意乱 What's he coming in for? - If he's all upset,
那他应该回家服丧了 then he should be home in mourning.
很明显 你不能抱怨 And you can't complain, obviously.
不 你不能去找经理 这是一个没有胜算的局面 No, you can't go to the manager. It's a no- win situation.
是啊 你知道还有什么吗 现在别人还可怜他他还能额外拿小费 Yeah, and you know what else? Now he gets a condolence tip.
-是的 你别无选择 -是的 Yeah. You got no choice. Yeah.
嘿 让我问你一个问题 这是怎么回事 Hey, let me ask you a question. What's going on here?
-什么 -这是 这是新的 What? - This is a- - This is new.
我不知道你在说什么 I don't know what you're talking about.
你决定染头发了 Uh, you decided to just dye your hair?
-什么 -你不知道 Wha Yeah. What? - You don't- -
你不知道它现在是棕色的 上周还是灰色的 you don't know that it's brown and it was gray last week?
-你这么做是为了什么 -我 我喜欢 What are you doing that for? - I- - I like it.
哦 是的 你喜欢吗 Oh, yeah, you like it?
-我知道 -你确定麦克白夫人 I do. - You sure Lady Macbeth
与那件事无关吗 didn't have anything to do with that?
你巴不得你有一个关心你的妻子 You wish you had a wife that cared about you.
-你巴不得你有个妻子 -我差点做了一个 You wish you had a wife. - I almost did a
我差点吐口水了 I almost did a spit take.
杰夫 你是自愿做出这个选择的 Jeff, you made this choice by your own free will.
对吗 你告诉他 告诉他 Is that right? You tell him. Tell him!
终于来了 这是我们的食物 Finally! There's our food.
-哦 本尼 -是的 Oh, Benny. Yeah.
我听说了你母亲的事 I heard about your mother.
-我很抱歉 -哦 天哪 I'm so sorry. Oh, gosh.
非常感谢你这么说 Thank you so much for saying that,
-他在干什么 -这可能要花很长时间了 What's he doing? This could take forever now.
我是说 你只有一个母亲 我崩溃了 I mean, you only get one mother. I'm devastated,
老实说 我不想 哦 谢谢 to be honest. I don't wanna- Oh, thank you.
他说的是他妈妈 He's talking about his mother.
-非常感谢你 -是的 Thank you so much. - Yeah.
这太不可思议了 这是我的汤 This is unbelievable. And there's my soup!
它放在那里 都变冷了 It's sitting there, getting cold.
嘿 我点了金枪鱼三明治 那也没救了 Hey! I ordered a tuna melt. That's fucked.
但最终导致她死亡的是败血症 But it was the sepsis that ultimately killed her.
我好饿 I am so fucking hungry.
-我也饿了 -呃 对不起 I'm starving, too. Uh, sorry.
只是有很多事情要处理 你知道吗 It's just a lot to process, you know?
节哀顺变 I'm so sorry for your loss.
你告诉瑞伊阿姨了吗 Did you tell Auntie Rae
你要来 还是要给她一个惊喜 that you're coming, or are you gonna surprise her?
哦 不 不 她不擅长惊喜 Oh, no, no. She's not good with surprises.
你不能对老人做这种事 伙计 You can't do that shit to old people, man.
我差点就那样害死了一个叔叔 I mean, I almost killed a uncle like that.
-是的 -那老混蛋在浴缸里洗澡 Yeah. - This motherfucker was in the tub taking a fucking bath.
-对吗 -他说 搞什么鬼 Right? He's like, "What the fuck? "
就是这样 这混蛋就这样死了 That was it. Motherfucker died like this.
就像 明白我的意思吗 Just like You know what I mean?
是啊 你不能给一个老人惊喜 Yeah, you can't surprise an old person.
不 你不能这么做 明白我的意思吗 No, you can't do that. Know what I mean?
我明白你的意思 你干嘛老是问我懂不懂你的意思 I know what you mean. Why do you keep asking me if I know what you mean?
没那么难 这不是科学 It wasn't that difficult. It's not science.
你举了一个非常简单的例子 You made a very simple statement.
是啊 我明白你的意思 Yeah, I know what you mean.
是的 Yeah. -
看看这个 又是你 Look at this. Fucking you again.
今天是第三次或第四次了 Third or fourth time today.
呀 又是误拨 Jeez! Another butt dial.
哦 伙计 对不起 Oh, man. I'm sorry.
这让我处境艰难 It puts me in a bad spot.
让你陷入 让我陷入最糟糕的境地 Puts you in a Puts me in the worst spot.
因为我上周给一个人打了电话 Because I called a guy last week.
-是的 -我14年没跟他说过话 Yeah. I hadn't spoken to him
所以我假装 in 14 years, and so I got to pretend
-我有意给他打电话 -对 that I was calling him. Right.
接下来 我就和他吃晚饭了 And the next thing you know, you're having dinner.
看 我 我把手机放在前面的口袋里 See, me, I carry my phone in my front pocket.
但有时 我还是会误拨电话给别人 But sometimes, I dick dial people by mistake.
哦 你老二会拨号 Oh, you make a dick dial?
有一次 我误点了一份披萨 One time, I ordered a pizza by mistake.
这个混蛋出现了 我说 这他妈的是什么 This motherfucker shows up, I said, "The fuck is this? "
你之前点了一份披萨 哇 我的老二 "You ordered a pizza earlier. "Wow, my fucking dick.
有时候 我能听到我的老二 And sometimes, I can hear my dick
拨一个号码 dialing a number.
明白我的意思吗 Know what I mean?
我就想 你他妈的在干什么 I'm like, "What the fuck are you doing? "
你知道我在说什么吗 You know what I'm saying?
我知道你在说什么 I do know what you're saying.
-没错 伙计 -你知道我的意思吗 Exactly, man. - Do you know what I mean?
- 明白我的意思吗 -你知道我的意思吗 Know what I mean? - You know what I mean?
你明白我的意思吗 Do you know what I mean?
-不 不 你明白我的意思吗 -哦 哇 她来了 No, no. Do you know what I mean? - Oh, wow. Here she is.
他们叫那叫DTM They call that shit DTM.
- 是的 -过犹不及 Yeah. "Doing too much. "
哦 你好 Ooh! Hi.
不忍直视 不是吗 It's hard to watch, isn't it?
哦 好吧 看看谁来了 Oh, well, look who's here.
-公主来了 -啊 · The princess has arrived. Ah!
有点迟了 不是吗 Cutting it kind of close, no?
哦 没有我飞机是不会起飞的 Oh, the plane won't take off without me.
-这是什么 -这是我的情绪安抚狗 佩丘卡 What is this? This is my emotional support dog, Pechuca.
-哇 -情绪安抚狗 Wow. Emotional support dog?
真是瞎搞 What a scam.
如果你精神不稳定 They shouldn't even let you on the plane
他们甚至不应该让你上飞机 if you're that mentally unstable.
-这不是骗局 -这只狗超重了 It is not a scam, This dog is overweight.
他们会在飞机上多收你200美元的 They're gonna charge you 200 dollars extra on the flight.
狗就像金鱼 Dogs are like goldfish.
是有喂食过量这一说的 You can overfeed this motherfucker.
你能不羞辱我的狗胖吗 Can you not fat shame my dog?
你侮辱不了狗他们不懂 You can't insult a dog. They don't know.
-是的 -她有 -你需要自我意识 Yes, she does. - You need self- awareness
才能明白有人在羞辱你 to understand someone's shaming you.
这只狗不会转身来问 This dog is not gonna turn around and go,
你他妈的说什么 "What the fuck you say? "
看 看我的 嘿 胖子 Look, watch this. Hey, fat fuck.
你这个肥仔 你胖死了 You a fat ass. You fucking fat.
你这个矮胖墩 You a short, fat ass dog.
看 看到了吗 狗不知道 Look at that. See? The dog don't know.
来吧 佩丘卡 我不想迟到 Come on, Pechuca. I don't wanna be late.
佩丘卡 他们在飞机上吃了顿饭 And, Pechuca, they got a meal on the flight.
不要这样做 别再吃别的了 Don't do it. Don't you eat nothing else.
看到了吗 See that?
-我打赌他听到那部分了 -是的 你告诉他了 · I bet he heard that part. - Yeah, you told him.
客房服务 Housekeeping.
哦 进来 Oh, come in.
嘿 早上好 Hey. Good morning.
有问题吗 There's a problem?
翻白眼是怎么回事 What's with the eye roll?
我一会儿再来 I come back.
你是什么意思 等一下 What do you mean? Wait a second.
我不懂 我做错什么了吗 I don't understand. Did I do something wrong?
这 这是个典型的房间 This- - this is a typical room.
到处都是衣服 There's clothes strewn about.
是的 我看到有内衣和袜子 Yes, I see there's underwear and socks.
-我一会儿再来 -什么 我做了什么 I come back. - What? What did I- -
这是人们在酒店里都会做的事 是啊 That's what people do when they're in a hotel. Yeah.
袜子 内衣在地板上 你不在乎 Socks, underwear on the floor. You don't care.
你不 你不在家 You're not- - you're not home.
我 我完全被这整件事弄糊涂了 I'm- - I'm completely bewildered by this whole thing.
我真的不明白 我的意思是 这是一个典型的房间 I really don't understand. I mean, this was a typical room.
顺便说一句 我很体贴服务人员 By the way, I'm very considerate of housekeeping.
你应该知道这一点 You should know this.
我保证这房间里会有小费给你 I guarantee you there'll be a tip for you in this room.
-保证 -我一会儿再来 Guaranteed. - I come back.
我觉得我让你失望了 I feel like somehow I've disappointed you.
-我一会儿再来 -我做了什么 I come back later. - What have I done?
我只是住在在旅馆里 I'm just staying in a hotel.
这是你第一次打扫房间吗 Is this your first room you've ever cleaned?
旅馆就是这么回事 This is what a hotel is.
哦 我的上帝 Oh, my God.
我们走吧 佩丘卡 Let's go, Pechuca.
我爱你 来吧 佩丘卡 来吧 宝贝 I love you. Come on, Pechuca, Come on, baby.
-哦 我的天啊 你们到了 -啊 嘿 Oh, my goodness. You made it. - Ah! Hey!
见到你真好 It's so good to see you.
哦 上帝保佑 Oh, Lord have mercy.
-看看你 -我给你带了礼物 Look at you. - I brought you a gift.
你知道 你本人和在镜头前一样可爱 You know, you are as sweet in person as you are on camera.
哦 哦 你也有一个 好吧 谢谢你 宝贝 Oh- - Oh, you got one, too. Okay. Thank you, baby.
你们都进来吧 进来吧 Come on in, y'all. Come on in.
哦 拉里 我要给你看样东西 Oh, Larry, I gotta show you something.
你能告诉我那边是谁吗 Can you tell me who that is right there?
-哦 天啊 -来吧 伙计 Oh, boyl- Come on, man.
-看看你 看那儿 -猜猜那是谁 Look at you. Look at that. - Guess who that is.
看那个英俊的小伙子 Look at that handsome lad. -
我有4.0的APA 泡妞绩点 I had a 4, 0 APA, "Ass- Point- Average. "
-里昂 -在高中的时候 eon. In high school,
我是泡妞的毕业生代表 I was the valedictorian of tapping ass,
你知道吗 拉里 见到你真是太好了 You know what, Larry? It is so good to see you.
我从没见过你这样 你看起来棒极了 I haven't seen you in such a- - You look fantastic
-你也是 -顺便说一句 So do you. by the way.
我不敢相信 真的吗 I cannot believe I do, really?
-是的 的确如此 -那我呢 Yes, indeed. - What about me?
-那是什么 -我们得动员投票 What's that? We got to get the vote out,
这是一个非常重要的问题 拉里 This a very important one, Larry.
-两天后 -哦 是的 是的 我听说了这件事 And in two days. Oh, yeah, yeah. I heard about this.
是啊 你听说这次选举了吗 Yeah, you heard about this election?
是的 我读到过 Yeah, I read about that.
是啊 哦 拉里 我要你放开胃口尝尝 Yeah. Oh, Larry, I want you to help yourself
我的一些开胃菜 听着 来吧 宝贝 to some of my hors d'oeuvres. Listen, come on, baby.
我们将为您奉上美酒 We gon serve your wine
-配午饭 来吧 现在 -哦 不客气 for Iunch! Come on, now. Oh, you're welcome.
那看起来一点也不好 That does not look good at all.
看起来真的不能吃 It really looks inedible.
什么 你在干嘛 What? What are you doing?
你看到了吗 Did you see- -
-你拿了我的眼镜 -哦 我喜欢 You took my glasses. Oh, I love it.
-谢谢 谢谢 -你做了什么 Thank you, thank you. What did you do?
-你为什么拿走我的眼镜 -她想尝试一种新的风格 Why'd you take my glasses? - She wanted to try a new style.
我想看看你的眼镜戴在她身上是什么样子 I wanted to see what your glasses looked like on her.
你本可以问我的 You know, you could have asked me.
-你会拒绝的 -你是认真的吗 You would have said no. Are you serious?
你知道 我戴上看得很清楚 You know, I can see well through'em.
我想我们可能有相同的度数 I think we might have the same prescription.
我能拿回我的眼镜吗 Can I have my glasses back, please?
好吧 好吧 这里 AIl right, fine. Here.
-搞什么鬼 -什么 怎么了 What the hell? - What? What's wrong?
-怎么了 -是的 What's wrong? Yes.
不合适了 They don't fit.
-哦 我的天啊 -你把它们撑大了 Oh, my goodness. - You stretched them out.
-不 我没有 -你做了什么 No, I didn't. - What'd you do?
我没对他们做什么 一定是 I didn't do anything to'em. They must've been like that
-她给我的时候就是那样的 -不 不是那样的 when she gave'em to me. No! They weren't like that.
看看她的头有多大 骗人的吧 Look at the size of her head. Are you kidding?
你不能随便拿一副眼镜试戴 You can't just take a pair of glasses and try them on.
你的脑袋太大了 You have a big head.
-我敢说 大得畸形 -不 我没有大脑袋 Dare I say, freakish? - No, I don't have a big head.
太过分了 它就像一个南瓜灯 It's excessive. It's like a jack- o- lantern.
你知道吗 你像花生先生一样有个花生脑袋 You know what? You got a peanut head like Mr. Peanut.
-看看这个 看看这个 -我没有 Look at this. Look at this. - I did not- -
-我告诉你 -看 看啊 I'll tell you what. Look! Look!
-我看到了 我看到了 -眼镜不愿意留在我脸上 I see it! I see it! They won't stay on my face.
眼镜不愿意留在我脸上 好吧 They won't stay on my- - - Fine!
听着 我有一副备用眼镜 Listen, I got a spare pair of glasses.
我会把它们带给你 I will bring them to you
所以你可以戴上它们 我马上回来 so you can wear them. I'll be right back.
-你怎么了 -这些眼镜容易坏 What is wrong with you? These glasses are fragile.
她有一个他妈的大脑袋 她弄坏了我的眼镜 She's got a giant fucking head. She ruined my glasses.
-有什么大不了的 -重要的是我在亚特兰大 What is the big deal? The big deal is I'm in Atlanta.
我没有备用的 I don't have a spare pair.
我今晚有个派对 I got the party tonight.
没时间了 我不能戴这个 There's no time and I can't wear these.
这个混蛋什么都看不见 This motherfucker can't see for shit.
嘿 伙计 你他妈的在干什么 Hey! Man, what the fuck are you doing?
你个胖子 Get your fat ass
快从我的夹克上下来 你疯了 off my jacket. You crazy?
佩丘卡不胖 Pechuca is not fat.
我之前告诉过你个胖墩离我远点 I told your pudgy ass before to stay off my shit.
不要那样和佩丘卡说话 Do not talk to Pechuca like that.
好吧 好吧 好吧 AlI right, all right, all right.
别傻了 给你眼镜 Cut out the foolishness. Here are the glasses.
现在 我要把它们借给你 Now, I'm gonna give them to you on loan.
但是记住 你得把它 But remember, you gotta give them back to me
在你离开乔治亚之前还给我 before you leave Georgia
-这太荒谬了 -试一下 － This is ridiculous. - Just try em on.
你能看清 对吧 You can see through'em, right?
是的 我能看见 Yeah, I can see.
谢谢你 这就是我要说的 Thank you. That's all I'm saying.
看起来怎么样 How do they look?
戴在花生脑袋上看起来真可笑 They look fucking ridiculous with a peanut fucking head.
哦 不 Oh, no!
啊 你好 Ah. Hey there.
哦 利加亚 Oh, Ligaya.
你是这么发音的吗 利加亚 Is that how you pronounce it? Ligaya?
多美的名字啊 这真的是相当 What a beautiful name. That is a really substantial,
美丽的外国名字 我非常喜欢 beautiful foreign name. I like it a lot.
-你为什么戴女士眼镜 -哦 好吧 是的 Why you wear lady glasses? Oh, well, yeah,
实际上是有人打碎了我的眼镜 somebody broke my glasses, essentially.
但是 你知道 说到眼镜 顺便说一句 But, you know, speaking of glasses, by the way,
我能问你个假设的问题吗 can I give you a hypothetical?
如果有客人把眼镜掉在马桶里 If a guest dropped glasses in the toilet,
谁会把眼镜从马桶里捞出来 who fishes the glasses out of the toilet?
那是归你的部门管吗 Is that your department?
是要那个从来没有把手 Or is it the guest who's never put his hands
伸进马桶的人来 in a toilet in his life?
还是非常熟悉怎么做 Or the housekeeper who's very familiar with it
在某种程度上 对整个情况没那么敏感 and is kind of desensitized, in a way, to the whole situation
戴着手套 and has gloves
还有设备和计划的清洁部门服务人员 and has the equipment and a plan?
你是做什么的 What do you do?
这是一个合理的问题 It's a legitimate question.
我有工作 我有工作 I have job. I have work.
不 但是眼镜呢 No, but what about the glasses?
是你去把马桶里的眼镜拿出来吗 Do you get the glasses out of the toilet?
你自己去拿 You get'em yourself!
什么 嘿 不是我的 我从没说过 What? Hey! They're not mine. I never said
那是我的眼镜 那只是假设 they were my glasses. That was a hypothetical.
假设意味着它是可能的 A hypothetical means it's possible
也许不可能 and maybe not possible.
只是个问题 It's just a question.
你这个坏脾气 You know, you're quite a farbissiner.
好吧 看看这个 AlI right, look at this
好吧 我们开始吧 All right, here we go. -
老天爷 Oh, my words.
-拉里·戴维 -哦 Larry David. Oh.
玛丽亚·索菲亚 Maria Sofia.
-哇 伙计们 -你好 Wow, guys. Hello.
-嗨 -欢迎光临 Hi. Welcome!
很高兴见到你 拉里 It's so nice to meet you, Larry.
很高兴见到你 Nice to meet you.
你们能来我家真是荣幸 What an honor to have you guys in my house.
-你家 -是的 Your house? - Yes.
你是迈克尔·福查伊 You're Michael Fouchay?
是的 迈克尔·福查伊 今天是我生日 Yeah, Michael Fouchay. It's my birthday.
我以为你是非洲人 I thought you were African.
是啊 我是 我是南非人 在约堡出生长大 Yeah, I am. I'm South African. Born and raised in Joburg.
啊 这是我的朋友里昂 我跟你说过 Ah! Uh, this is my friend, Leon, I was telling you about.
里昂·布莱克（黑） Leon Black.
-啊 握个手 里昂 -很高兴见到你 Ah, put it there, Leon. - Very good to meet you.
-很高兴见到你 -房子不错 Nice to meet you. Nice house.
是啊 不用了 谢谢 欢迎光临 Yeah. No, thanks. Welcome.
怎么 怎么 嗯 有些不一样了 How- - how- - Um, something's different.
是不是 有些东西看起来不一样了 Is it the Something looks different.
有人用她的大脑袋把我的眼镜撑坏了 Somebody stretched out my glasses with her big head,
所以我戴的是她的 so I'm wearing hers.
这其实比他平时戴的好看 These actually look better than the ones he usually wears.
她太机灵了 这个 嘿 确实好看 She's so quick, this one, hey? They actually do.
-他们看起来很有气质 -是的 我知道 They look very sort of arty. - Yeah, I know.
你真机智 You are so witty.
-你真机智 -这是什么 You are so witty. What is this?
如果你是南非人 You don't tell people you're from Africa
-你不能告诉别人你来自非洲 -如果这混蛋是非洲人 if you're from South Africa. - If this motherfucker's African,
我就是 I'm fucking a
那该死的书里的那个小男孩叫什么 What's the little boy in that fucking book
脸上有雀斑 with the freckles on his face,
穿着工作服 光着他妈的脚 with the overalls and the fucking bare feet,
他看起来总是湿漉漉的 and he looked wet all the time?
- 哈克贝里·芬恩 -哈克贝里·芬恩 Huckleberry Finn. Huckleberry fucking Finn.
-是啊哈克贝里·芬恩 -我们太激动了 Yeah, Huckleberry Finn. - We are so excited.
有那么多人想见你 There are so many people that wanna meet you.
-真的吗 我吗 -是的 绝对是 Really? Me? - Yes, absolutely.
嘿 食物在哪里 Hey, where the fucking food at?
外面是 有非常令人难以置信的自助餐 Outside is a- - there's an incredible buffet there.
任何你想要的 请便 Anything you want, please make yourself
-别客气 -哇哦 不必多说 absolutely at home. - Whoo- hoo! Say less.
干杯 我的兄弟 Cheers, my brother.
啊 你刚刚损失了大约一半的自助餐 Ah, you just lost about half the buffet.
哦 不 我们有很多 我们还有很多 Oh, no. We've got plenty. We got plenty.
听着 我特别想让你见见布鲁基 Listen, I especially want you to meet Brookie.
哦 啊 她 Uh Ah, there she-
啊 没关系 我们现在就去找她 Ah, never mind. We'll grab her now.
她刚出去 你会爱上她的 She's just stepping out. You're gonna love her.
当人们告诉我 You know, when people tell me
我会爱上一个人 I'm going to love someone,
我就直觉不去喜欢他们 I'm kind of programmed not to like them.
所以对布鲁基来说很不妙 So it's kind of a lose- lose for Brookie.
布鲁克 布鲁克 Uh, Brooke. Brooke.
-谁 -就叫她布鲁克吧 Who? - Just call her Brooke.
-她 她叫布鲁克 -你刚才说布鲁基 Her- - her name's Brooke. - You just said Brookie.
哦 只有她真正亲密的朋友才叫她布鲁克 Oh, only her really close friends call her Brookie.
所以我不能叫她布鲁基 So I can't call her Brookie?
不 不行 No. No.
我能把你介绍给我的一些客人吗 Can I introduce you to some of my guests?
-哦 我很乐意 -交际 Oh, I would love that. - Mingle,
-拍些照片 -哦 我会的 do some photos Oh, I would
- 太喜欢了是的 -那太棒了 so love that. Yes. that'd be amazing.
接下来你能帮我签一个吗 我叫艾丽 Can you sign one for me next? My name's Allie.
-我想我是你最大的粉丝 -哦 I think I'm your biggest fan. - Oh!
真正困扰我的是 And the thing that really bothers me- -
我想告诉你一件事 你知道 I wanna tell you something. You know how there's like,
在杂货店里有 green bags, clear bags
-绿色袋子 透明袋子 -当然 in the grocery store. - Sure.
他们把应该放绿色的地方放了透明的 They put clear where they should put green.
-绿色 -他们在绿色里放透明的 Green- They put clear in the green
-绿色的在透明的那里 -你明白吗 and the green in the clear. - You understand?
是啊 当然 绿色的在透明的里面 Yeah, sure. The green in the clear
-你遇到过这种情况吗 -而且 Has this happened to you? - and
好吧 哦 妈的 Okay. Oh, shit!
于是他们放下了两支睫毛膏 So they put their two mascaras down
汉娜带着她的走了 Hannah walked off with hers.
哦 汉娜带着她的走了 哦 Oh, Hannah walked off with hers. Oh!
她做到了 She did.
-哇 -她做到了 Wow! - She did.
-她走开了 -哦 She walked off! - Oh.
哦 妈的 该死的生日蛋糕 Oh, shit. Goddamn birthday cake.
好吧 AIl right.
好吧 Okay. -
好吧 Okay.
你有没有注意到当你拍照的时候 Have you noticed that when you take a picture,
你看起来没 you don't look nearly as good
你照镜子时那么上相 as you do when you look in the mirror?
-是的 -因为镜子 － Yeah. - Because the mirror
就是你如何看自己的样子 is how you see yourself.
照片就是他人看到的样子 And the photo is how you're seen.
太深奥了 Fuck, that's deep.
我来问你这个问题 你去过非洲吗 Let me ask you this question. You ever been to Africa?
不 不过 我很想去 No. I would love to go, though.
我想知道一个黑人去非洲 I wonder if a Black man going to Africa
是不是就像一个犹太人去以色列 is like a Jew going to Israel.
如果你是去以色列做爱 你知道我在说什么吗 If you go to Israel to fuck, you know what I'm saying?
我告诉你吧 让我们计划一次旅行 I'll tell you what. Let's plan a trip.
我们会去刚果 We'll hit the Congo
-哦 我喜欢 -你知道吗 Oh, I like that. - you know?
然后 我们会去特拉维夫 And then, we'll go to Tel Aviv.
-我来帮你忙 你帮我忙 -我喜欢 I'll tap yours. You tap mine. - I love that.
-那才叫旅行 -知道吗 That is a trip. - Know what?
我马上把吃喝加满 I'm gonna go top this bitch off right here.
一会儿见 花花公子 I'l see you in a minute, playboy,
你好啊 Well, hello there.
你好 Hello!
迈克尔坚持要我见你 我是布鲁克 Michael insisted that I meet you. I'm Brooke.
-是的 你好 拉里 -很高兴见到你 拉里 Yes, hi. Larry Nice to meet you, Larry.
很高兴见到你布鲁基 Well, it's nice to meet you, Brookie.
我是布鲁克 Uh, it's Brooke.
-打扰一下 -我是布鲁克 我叫布鲁克 Excuse me? It's Brooke. My name is Brooke.
-布鲁克 -是的 Brooke. Yeah.
迈克尔告诉我布鲁克和布基克的事 Michael told me about the Brooke- Brookie thing.
没什么事 我叫布鲁克 There's not a thing. My name is Brooke.
迈克尔叫你布鲁克基 Michael calls you Brookie.
我的好朋友都叫我布鲁基 M- - my good friends call me Brookie.
我刚认识的人都叫我布鲁克 People I just met call me Brooke.
个人需要认识你多长时间才能 How long does one need to know you
把布鲁克变成布鲁基 before Brooke becomes Brookie?
-嗯 -布鲁基 Well Brookiel
-哦 我的上帝 卡尔 -嗨 你好 Oh, my God, Carl Hi! Hello.
我好像在房间对面看到你了 I thought I saw you across the room.
-啊 你见过拉里吗 -还没有 嗨 拉里 Ah! Did you meet Larry? Not yet. Hi, Larry.
我是卡尔 我们高兴极了 I'm Carl. We are tickled pink
-你在这里 -谢谢你 卡尔 that you are here. Thank you, Carl.
很高兴 很高兴见到你 Nice- - nice to meet you.
我得把这个给辛西娅 I gotta get this out to Cynthia.
很高兴见到你 我一会儿 So, good to see you. I'll catch up
-再聊 -当然 with you in a minute. Absolutely.
很高兴见到你 拉尔 So nice to meet you, Larr.
-好吧 -再见 布鲁基 Okay. Bye, Brookie.
再见 Bye.
你说什么 What was that?
只是和布鲁基说再见 Just saying bye to Brookie.
所以你叫她布鲁基 So you call her Brookie?
-是的 -你认识她多久了 Yeah. - How long have you known her?
我们几个月前在一次晚宴上认识的 Well, we met a few months ago at a dinner party.
这是你第二次见她吗 And this is the second time you're seeing her?
是的 第二次 Yeah, second time.
你们在晚宴上见过一次面 So you met once at a dinner party
你一直叫她布鲁基 and you've been calling her Brookie?
-是的 -你叫她布鲁基吗 Yeah. Did you call her Brookie
在晚宴上 at the dinner party?
是啊 是啊 我想是的 Yeah. Yeah, I think so.
她没说 叫我布鲁克 She didn't say, "Call me Brooke"?
没有 No.
你知道布鲁克 布鲁基规则吗 Are you aware of the Brooke- Brookie rule?
-不 我不知道 -因为 No, I'm not aware of that. Because
你似乎违反了布鲁克布鲁基规则 you seem to be in violation of the Brooke Brookie rule.
-给我讲讲 -是的 Please, educate me. - Yeah.
我怎么违反了这条规则 How am I in violation of this rule?
只有她的密友才能叫她布鲁基 Well, only her close friends can call her Brookie.
那个派对上还有其他人吗 Is there anybody else from that party here?
有啊 布鲁基 Yeah. Brookie.
嗯嗯 还有其他人吗 Mm- hmm. Anyone else?
我 我是卡尔 Me. I'm Carl.
这很有意思 很有意思 This is interesting. Very interesting.
-是吗 -是的 Is it? Yes.
我把这件事问清楚的 I'm gonna get to the bottom of this.
开始吧 好极了 Here we go. That's great.
怎么样 我们应该再拍一个吗 How's that? Should we do another one?
拉尔 拉尔 拉尔 进来吧 进来吧 Larr! Larr, Larr. Get in here. Get in here.
-我们在拍集体照 -我现在不行 We're doing a group shot. - I can't now.
-我们在拍照片 -我不 我现在不能拍照 We're doing a photo. - I can't. I can't do it now.
集体照 A group shot.
-对不起 打扰一下 -什么事 Excuse me. Excuse me. - Yes?
我得告诉你 我有点困惑 I got to tell you, I'm a little confused
和布鲁克 布鲁基规则有关 about the Brooke Brookie rule.
哦 没有规则 Oh, there's not a rule.
只是 哦 不 我不敢苟同 It's just- - Oh, no, I beg to differ.
我认为有一个规则 I think there is a rule.
卡尔 Now, Carl,
他和你一面之交 叫你布鲁基 who hardly knows you at all, calls you Brookie,
尽管我得到了非常严格的指示 whereas I was given very strict instructions,
叫你布鲁克 by you, to call you Brooke.
-卡尔是个好人 -不 不 Carl is a great guy. No, no!
卡尔不是个好人 我刚和卡尔谈过 Carl is not a great guy. I just spoke to Carl.
我根本不觉得卡尔是个好人 I didn't find Carl to be a great guy at all.
如果我有一个拉尔 拉里规则 If I had a Larr Larry rule,
卡尔就不会叫我拉尔了 Carl wouldn't be calling me Larr.
-我可以告诉你 -哦 我很抱歉 I can tell you that. - Oh, I'm so sorry.
你想让我叫你拉尔吗 Do you want me to call you Larr?
不 因为我没有拉尔 拉里规则 No, because I don't have a Larr- Larry rule.
我没有布鲁克 布鲁克规则 I don't have a Brooke Brookie Rule.
不 你知道 你确实有布鲁克 布鲁克规则 No, you do. You do have a Brooke Brookie rule.
而且只适用于我 And it only applies to me.
拉里 我叫布鲁克 Larry, my name is Brooke.
祝你玩得开心 Have a good night. -
哟 生日快乐 Yo, happy birthday.
哦 谢谢你 谢谢你 我的兄弟 Oh, thank you. Thank you, my brother.
非常感谢你 Thank you so much.
真的 说真的 Really. Seriously.
非常感谢 Thank you so much.
老实说 任何时候 欢迎你回来 Honestly, any time, you're welcome back.
-随时奉陪 -好吧 好吧 好吧 Any time. AII right. Okay. Okay.
-好吧 好吧 -拉里 干杯 谢谢 再见 AII right. Okay. Larry, cheers. Thanks, bye.
好吧 那么 All right, so
好吧 All right.
我们做到了 我们来了 我们出现在派对上 We did it. Here we were. We showed up at the party.
我们来了 没错 We came out. Yep.
是啊 有意思 很有意思 Yeah, interesting. Very interesting.
是啊 这是 感觉很好 非常好 Yeah. It was It was nice. Very good.
现在结束了 都结束了 是啊 Now it's done. It's all done. Yeah.
-好吧 好吧 -好吧 AlI right. Okay. - Okay.
大家好 我住在一家不错的酒店 What's up, y'all? Im in a nice hotel.
佩丘卡 不 等等 佩丘卡 Pechuca, no wait! Pechuca.
哦 噢 天哪 嘿 Oh. Oh, my God. Hey!
搞什么鬼 Wha What the hell?
-你挡道了 -哦 伙计 You're standing in the way. - Oh, man!
你的狗流了我一身口水 Your dog slobbered all over me.
请不要在佩丘卡周围尖叫 Don't scream around Pechuca, please.
她很敏感 She's sensitive. -
现在 我得去洗裤子了 Now, I got to go clean my pants.
哦 好吧 很好 反正你的裤子也没品味 Oh, well, good. They were basic anyways.
该死的狗 Fucking dog,
哦 不好意思 Oh, excuse me.
你知道早餐餐厅在哪里吗 You know where the restaurant is for breakfast?
-早餐 -没问题 是的 Breakfast? - Absolutely. - Yeah.
会 你知道吗 It's gonna- - You know what?
我跟你走可能会容易些 Uh, it's probably easier if I walk with you,
我可以亲自护送你去 I can just escort you myself.
那没必要 我能找到它 That's not necessary. I can find it.
只要给我指出正确的方向 Just point me in the right direction.
哦 这是我的荣幸步行不太远 Oh, it's my pleasure. It's not too far of a walk.
我很乐意带你去 I'm happy to take you.
你没必要这么做 我会 我会找到的 You don't have to do that. I'll I'll find it.
哦 一点也不麻烦 我陪你走 Oh, it's no trouble at all. I'll walk with you.
好吧 Okay.
好吧 这边走 All right. Right this way.
什么 What?
当真 Are you serious?
她是本月最佳员工 She's the employee of the month?
她是 她在这里已经六年了 She is. She's been here six years.
这是她最后一个月 This is her last month.
哦 难怪 Oh, no wonder. -
-你好 -嘿 Hello! Hey.
我有个坏消息 I got some bad news,
迈克尔·富查伊 Michael Fouchay,
不想付你出场费 uh, doesn't want to pay you the appearance fee.
你在说什么 为什么 What are you talking about? Why?
我不知道 他不回我电话 I don't know. He's not returning my calls.
不回我的邮件 Not returning my emails.
-我不知道该怎么办 -哇 真有胆量 I don't know what to do. - Wow. What a nerve.
带我大老远飞到这里 他不给我钱 Flew me all the way out here, he's not paying me?
-那是胡闹 -是啊 这是胡闹 That's bullshit! Yeah, it is bullshit.
我要去他的办公室 I'm gonna go to his office.
我有他的名片 我知道地址了 I have his card. I got the address.
我要拿回我的钱 I'm getting my money.
-你去做吧 -好吧 再见 You do that. - All right. Goodbye.
嘿 很高兴再次见到你 Hey, good to see you again.
一亿五千万 A hundred and fifty mil?
如果他投入1亿 无论伊隆给多少 我都给一样的 If he puts in 100 mil, I'll match whatever Elon does.
我本来要坐他的飞机 I was gonna fly in his plane.
现在他说 我必须坐自己的飞机 我不介意 Now he says, I must take my own plane. I don't mind.
我坐飞机 我只想走了 I'll take the plane. Ijust need to go
我坐飞机 我只想走了 I'll take the plane. I just need to go
等一下 我需要 我待会儿给你回电话 Hang on a second I need to I need to call you back.
拉里 我能帮你吗 Larry, can I help you?
我刚发现你不付钱 I just found out you're not paying me.
是真的吗 Is that true?
是啊 这是真的 Yeah, that is true.
骗人的吧 Are you kidding?
拉里 我不会付钱给你的 Larry, I'm not paying you
因为你违反了合同 'cause you're in violation of your contract.
违反合同 什么 Violation of the contract? What?
你说过你会很亲切 You said you were gonna be cordial.
你不亲切 You weren't cordial.
我不 你是说 I wasn't c- - You're saying to me,
好吧 我不亲切 我当然很亲切 okay, that I wasn't cordial? I most certainly was cordial.
你知道亲切是什么意思吗 Do you know what cordial means?
我和 是的 我很清楚这是什么意思 I spoke to- - Yes, I know exactly what it means.
它的意思是礼貌 友好 It means to be polite, to be friendly,
不要告诉别人你对他们的真实想法 and not to tell people what you really think of them
说他们都是些混蛋 and what assholes they all were.
-是的 真亲切 -你不够亲切 Yes. That's cordial. - You were not cordial.
我明白了 我明白了 I get it. I get it.
这是关于你亲爱的朋友布鲁基 对吗 This is about your dear friend, Brookie, right?
是因为布鲁基吗 因为我叫她布鲁基 Is this Brookie? Cause I called her Brookie?
我叫布鲁克布鲁基 I called Brooke Brookie?
你知道吗 卡尔叫她布鲁克 You know what? Carl called her Brookie.
卡尔几乎不认识她 他就见过她一次 Carl hardly knows her. He met her once.
我见过她一次 I met her once.
卡尔有什么我没有的 What's Carl got that I don't got?
-不 -别不尊重女人 No- - Don't disrespect a woman
如果你不太了解她 就叫她布鲁基 and call her Brookie if you don't know her that well.
只是出于礼貌 但是无论如何 It's just being polite. But anyway
-卡尔不认识她 -我就不计较这件事 Okay, Carl didn't know her. - I'll let it slide.
拉里 听我说 Larry, listen to me.
我不想这样 按美国人的方式 I don't wanna do this, this American way
互相吼叫 where we all just yell at each other.
你想后退一步吗 Do you wanna take a step back
-我要退一步 -用非洲的方式解决这件事 I'm gonna take a step back. - and do this the African way?
我想我们一开始就出师不利 I think we got off on the wrong foot.
我认为这里有一个伤囗 我们需要试着治愈它 I think there's a wound here and we need to try and heal it.
-我们开始吧 -你听说过真相与和解委员会吗 Let's do it. - Have you heard of the TRC?
我不知道那是什么 I don't know what that is.
-南非的真相与和解委员会 -哦 我听说过 是的 － The Truth and Reconciliation Commission in South Africa. - Oh, I've heard of that. Yes.
我们就是这样治愈种族隔离的 That was how we healed apartheid.
-我想和你做类似的事 -好吧 好吧 I wanna do something similar with you. Okay. All right.
来吧 坐下 Come in. Sit down.
-你知道 我会坐下来 -请坐 You know, I'll take a seat. - Have a seat.
-我坐下 -谢谢 I'll sit down. Thank you.
-我坐下 -谢谢你 拉里 欢迎光临 I'll sit down. Thank you, Larry. Welcome.
-好吧 好吧 -好吧 AlI right. Okay. Okay.
我当德斯蒙德·图图 I'm gonna be Desmond Tutu
然后我会问你一些问题 and then I'm gonna ask you questions.
-你要做图图 -是的 You're gonna be Tutu? - Yeah,
因为图图是问问题的人 because Tutu was the guy asking the questions.
但在这个特殊的案例中 我是受害者 But in this particular case, I was a victim.
你不应该是图图 我应该是图图 You shouldn't be Tutu. I should be Tutu.
我们不可能都是图图 We can't both be Tutu.
-我们不能有两个图图 -不 你不能有两个图图 We can't have two Tutus. - No, you can't have two Tutus.
我换个名字好吗 我叫弗兰克 I'll be a different name, okay? My name's Frank.
不 不 你想做图图 就做图图 No, no. You wanna be Tutu, be Tutu.
好吧 所以 Okay. So
拉里 谢谢你今天能来 Larry, thanks for coming in today.
当然 图图先生 Of course, Mr. Tutu,
你想告诉今天在场的每一个人吗 Would you like to tell everyone present here today
你是否认为 if you believe
你遵守了这份合同 that you truly honored this contract
应该得到报酬 and deserve the payment?
我想我已经尽力了 I think I did to the best of my ability.
我假装热情 假装感兴趣 I faked cordiality and I feigned interest.
老实说 我很失望 I'm gonna be honest, I'm disappointed.
我对我童年的英雄有更高的期望 I was expecting more from my childhood hero.
我一生对自己的期望很高 I've been expecting more from myself my whole life
但是我做不到 and it's just not there.
你承认造成了不好的氛围吗 Do you accept that it was a bad vibe, actually,
毁了我的派对和我的 and kind of ruined my party and my- -
我毁了我在我的一生中 I've ruined every party I've ever gone to
参加过的每一个派对 in my entire life.
-我气场不好 -我只是想 I have bad energy. - I just expected
你会更加感激 that you'd be more grateful.
我真的尽力了 I really did the best
考虑到 under the circumstances of a person
我讨厌别人 却不得不和他们在一起 who hates people and yet had to be amongst them.
我觉得你很诚实 I feel like you are being honest.
对于一个人承认自己不喜欢别人 For someone to admit that they don't like people
他们有丕好的感觉并且气场不好的人来说 and they have a bad vibe is not easy.
是的 我不喜欢我自己 我也是一个人 Yes. I don't like myself. I'm a person.
你知道我们在真相与和解委员会学到了什么吗 拉里 You know what we learned in the TRC, Larry?
有时候 最不可能的 Sometimes, the unlikeliest
友谊可以发芽 of friendships can develop.
我觉得你我之间有共鸣 Ifeel like there is a connection.
呃 没有 那里 没有 Uh, no. There's There's not.
你知道我要为你做什么吗 拉里 You know what I'm gonna do for you, Larry?
我大人大量 I'm gonna step up here.
我会付给你钱的 I'm gonna pay you the money.
噢 天哪 真的吗 Oh, my God. Seriously?
我会付给你钱的 I'm gonna pay you the money.
-迈克尔·福查伊 -是的 Michael Fouchay. - Yes.
迈克尔·福查伊 Michael Fouchay.
-我们之间有一点温情 -是啊 你看到了吗 There's a bit of warmth there. - Yeah, you see it?
我能问你吗 趁这个温情的时候 Can I ask you- - While I have you in this warm moment,
我能问你件事吗 can I ask you something?
你介意帮我家小家伙签个名吗 Would you mind signing this for my little guy?
哦 一点也不 当然了 Oh. Not at all, Of course.
-很乐意 -谢谢 Happy to. Thank you,
非常感谢 太棒了谢谢你 谢了 Appreciate that. That's amazing Thank you. Thanks.
-所以这是给你儿子的 -哇 是的 So this is to your son? - Wow. Yes.
是啊 和我说话的那个小孩 Yeah, that little kid that I was talking to.
-是的 那个小家伙 是啊 -是的 呃 呃 克莱门 Yes, the little guy. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, uh, Kramen.
什么 What?
哦 我的儿子 Oh, my son.
-是的 你儿子 -是的 给我儿子 Yeah, your son. - Yeah, make it to my son.
西蒙 Simon.
西蒙 是啊 是啊 我就是这么说的 是啊 Simon! Yeah. Yeah, that's what I said. Yeah.
客房服务 Housekeeping!
混蛋 AssholeJ
你把小费留在厕所里 You leave me tip in toilet.
-喔 -你在做什么 Whoo! - What are you doing?
那是我的东西 That's my stuff.
-你是个坏人 -你疯了吗 · You're a bad man. - Are you out of your mind?
哦 我的老天爷哟 住手 Oh, my God. Stop it!
你为什么要这么做 我做了什么 Why are you doing this? What did I do?
你把我的小费扔进厕所 我扔你的衣服 You throw my tip in toilet, I toss your clothes.
你在说什么 What are you talking about?
什么 我没有 我没有把钱放进马桶里 What? I didn't- - I didn't put money in the toilet.
-喔 -你这个变态疯子 · Whoo! You sick maniac.
你疯了 You're insane,
我要轰轰烈烈地离职 I go out with a bang.
迈克尔 很高兴见到你 Michael, it was great to see you.
我们玩得很开心 We had a fantastic time. -
支票该什么时候到 就什么时候到 Whenever the check arrives, it arrives,
帮我个忙 Do me a favor.
代我向西蒙问好吗 我爱那孩子 Will you give my best to Simon? I love that kid.
是的 我想要 Yes, I'd love to get on a Zoom
和那小伙子视频聊天 with the lad. -
好吧 我们会解决的 AII right, we'll work it out then.
好吧 好吧 好吧 Okay. Okay. All right.
所以你得到报酬了 So you're getting paid?
-我会得到报酬的 是的 -我也是 I will get paid, yes. - Me too.
但是 伙计 这家伙有胆量 But man, does this guy have a nerve
威胁不给我钱 threatening not to pay me? -
什么 因为我不够亲切 What? Cause I wasn't cordial?
这个富查伊呢 And this Fouchay?
真是个讨厌鬼 他还在提出要求 What a pain in the ass! He's still making requests.
我要和他的儿子西蒙一起视频 I got to get on a Zoom with his son, Simon?
那孩子是个呆瓜 That kid's a potato.
他爸爸得捐一栋楼 His dad's gonna have to donate a building
才能让那孩子上大学 to get that kid into college.
你知道这个家伙最糟糕的是什么吗 You know what the worst thing about this Fouchay is?
试图冒充非洲人 Trying to pass himself off as African.
这家伙不是非洲人 他是南非人 This guy's not African, he's South African.
嘿 你坐在我手机上了 Hey, you're sitting on my phone.
佩丘卡 来 佩丘卡 来 来 来 Pechuca, come. Pechuca. Come, come, come.
来 佩丘卡 Come. Pechuca. -
喂 Hello?
再见 拉里 Goodbye, Larry.
再见 Goodbye.
一直往前走 Just keep going straight.
我想就在这个街区 I think it's right on this block.
我以为我们要去机场 I thought we were going to the airport.
我得把瑞伊阿姨的眼镜还回去 I just have to return Auntie Rae's glasses.
她在某个投票站投票 She's at some polling place voting.
在那里 它在右边 There it is. It's up on the right.
啊 那些人一定很热 Aw, those people must be so hot.
哦 她在那里 停车 Oh, there she is. Stop the car.
-瑞伊阿姨 -你好吗 Auntie Rae. How are you doing?
你好吗 How are you?
我很好 但是为什么 I'm good. But why are-
-看看你 -嘿 Look at you. Hey,
-看看你 -嘿 Look at you. Hey.
你在这里做什么 What you doing here?
我们在去机场的路上 Well, we're on our way to the airport,
但我觉得我们应该过来把这些还回来 but I thought we should stop by and return these.
-哦 你记得 -我记得 开什么玩笑 Oh, you remembered, I remembered Are you kidding?
它每时每刻都在我的脑海里 It was on my mind every minute.
我希望不是在你头上 Well, I hope it wasn t on your head.
我希望你没有撑坏了 I hope you didn t stretch these
我昨天把它们戴在屁股上了 Well, I put them around my butt yesterday,
所以它们可能会大一点 so they might be a little bigger.
哦 你们 这里很热 拉里 Oh, y'all It's hot out here, Larry.
伙计 这里热得太残忍了 Boy, this is brutal here.
-是的 -你等了多久了 － Yes. - How long you been waiting?
超过两个半小时 Over two and a half hou rs
-什么 -是的 -What? -Yes
-这太疯狂了 -太可怕了 That is just insane I lt's
看看他们为了投票让人们经历了什么 Look what they put people through just to vote.
我快融化了 拉里 I'm melting oyt here, Larr
你知道吗 我车里有些水 You know what? I got some water in the car,
-你想要吗 是啊 -我会喜欢的 Do you want i? Yeah. I would love
安静 胖子 Quiet, chubby.
给你 我就知道这会派上用场的 Here you go. I knew this would come in handy.
哦 是的 是的确实如此 Oh. Yes. Yes, indeed.
谢谢你给我这个 Thank you for this w-
先生 Sir! -
穿着海军蓝西装的 把手举到空中 In the navy blazer. Put your hands in the air.
-我 -是的 你 Me? Yeah, you.
你因违反选举诚信法案被捕 You under arrest for violation of the Election Integrity Act.
什么 你在说什么 What? What are you talking about?
在乔治亚州给任何 It is illegal for anyone in the state of Georgja
在投票站排队的选民 to provide food or water
-提供食物或水是违法的 -什么 太野蛮了 to voters in line at the polls. What? That's barbaric.
什么样的法律 你是认真的吗 What kind of law- - Are you serious?
我是认真的 你跟我走 I'm dead serious. You're coming with me.
你不能 哦 不 你犯了一个大错误 You can't do- - Oh, no, you're making a big mistake,
对不起 宝贝 我忘了 I'm sorry, baby. I forgot.
我甚至不是本地人 I'm not even from here!
我只是来参加一个聚会 I just came to make an appearance at a party.
而我连出场费都没拿到 And Ididn't even get paid!
我只是在与人为善 我很亲切 I was just being cordial. I was being cordial.