本字幕由落雨秋枫制作
是啊 Hello
啊? Yes?
什么? What?
先生，麻烦您把手机关掉 Sir, kindly switch off your mobile phone
就一会儿，一会儿 Just one sec, please
请问... Excuse me
先生，请坐好 Sir, please sit down
机长，出现紧急救护情况 Captain, there's a medical emergency
有乘客刚倒在通道上 A passenger has just fallen down in the aisle
德里，印度航空101因紧急救护正在返回 Delhi, Air India 101 returning due to medical emergency
嘿, 先生 Excuse me, sir
停下! Hold on !
我现在没事了，谢谢 你们忙去吧 I'm fine now, thanks. Carry on, please
先生，等一下 Wait
- 去开车 - 您是迪隆先生么? Get the car - Mr. Dhillon?
- 要我名字纹在额头上啊？把车开来 - 好的，先生 Want the name tattooed? Get the car
去酒店是吧, 先生? To the hotel, sir?
是啊，是啊，但要先去下瓦桑特 豪尔 Yes, yes, but via Vasant Vihar
踩油门啊，哥们！ Step on the gas, dude !
喂, 法汉 Yeah, Farhan?
准备好，我5分钟后来接你 Get ready. I'll pick you up in five minutes
怎么了? What happened?
接了个查图尔的电话 还记得他不? Chatur called. Remember him?
那个“消音器”啊? The 'Silencer'?
是的是的 Yeah
他说兰彻要来了 He said Rancho is coming
什么? What?
他说，“8点到学校，水塔上见” He said - Come to the campus at 8. On the tank
啊，惨啦! Oh shucks !
快点啊 Hurry
好，好 Ok
亲爱的，我很快回来 哦，鞋子 Honey, I'll be back soon. Oh, shoes
找到我们那死党了 We found our buddy
什么啊? What?
回来再说，再见啊 Tell me later, bye
忘穿裤子了你！ You forgot your pants
现在该去酒店了吧, 先生? Now to the hotel, sir?
对啊，但先去下帝国理工学院 Yes, but via Imperial College of Engineering
好吧，先生 Ok sir
袜子忘带了 Forgot my socks
不单是袜子 More than just your socks
还有你裤子 Your pants
啊，果然 Oh no
现在快回机场去接我那个弟弟吧 Now get my brother from the airport
跟我一个姓的,迪隆 Same last name - Dhillon
我是迪隆啊，接我的车在哪儿？还在路上？！ This is Dhillon. Where's my cab? On the runway?
嘿，兰彻 Hey Rancho
哎，查图尔, 兰彻在哪里? Hey Chatur, where's Rancho?
兰彻 Rancho
兰彻在哪里? Where's Rancho?
欢迎你们，白痴们 Welcome, idiots
要来些“马德拉”吗？ 印地语词典 “酒”(英语)=“马德拉”(印地语) Some 'madeira' for you?
就是你们以前狂喝的那种 The same rum you guzzled those days
来点吧 Have a drink
兰彻呢? Where is Rancho?
耐心点 先来看看这个 Patience. First look at this
别看我老婆，好好看后面的豪宅，你个白痴 Don't eye my wife. Check out the mansion behind, idiots
350万美元啊 $ 3.5 million
游泳池--有加热的哦 Swimming pool - heated
客厅--枫木地板的 Living room - maple wood flooring
我新买的兰博基尼6496 cc My new Lambhorghini 6496 cc -
相当地快啊 very fast
给我们看这些干嘛？ Why're you showing us all this?
你们忘了？ Forgot?
这是什么？ What's this?
“9月5号”，今天的日期啊 '5th September'. Today's date
我要和你挑战 I challenge you
10年后我们在这里见 We'll meet again after ten years
总有一天，在某个地方 Same day. Same place
看我们谁更成功 We'll see who's more successful
有种吗？来啊，打赌，赌啊 Have the balls? C'mon, bet
想起来了吧?我就在这里向那个白痴挑战的 Remember? I'd challenged that idiot right here
我信守诺言，回到了这里 I kept my promise. I'm back
混蛋！我强下了飞机，他裤子都忘穿了 Jackass I aborted a flight, he forgot his pants
就是来见兰彻的 all to meet Rancho
我们找了5年，连他是不是还活着都不知道 5 years we've searched. Don't know if he's alive
而你，却想着他会回来了结那个无聊的赌注 and you think he'll show up for your silly bet
不会来了，我就知道他不会来 I know he won't show up
你去打烂他下巴，要么我来 You gonna break his jaw or should I
那你叫我们来这里干嘛？ So why'd you call us here?
来见兰彻啊 To meet Rancho
来，看看我成功到什么地步了 而他在哪里腐烂着 Come and see where I've reached and where he rots
这么说你知道兰彻在哪里了？ So you know where Rancho is?
是啊 Yes
在哪里？ Where?
他在西姆拉 He is in Shimla
他曾像风一样自由 Free as the wind was he
他曾像翱翔的风筝 Like a soaring kite was he
他去了哪里.. 我们去找他吧 Where did he go... let's find him
他曾像风一样自由 Free as the wind was he
他曾像翱翔的风筝 Like a soaring kite was he
他去了哪里.. 我们去找他吧 Where did he go... let's find him
我们曾走着自选的道路 We were led by the path we took
而他开掘了自己的道路 While he carved a path of his own
跌倒了，爬起来，无忧无虑向前走 Stumbling, rising, carefree walked he
我们时常为明天烦恼 We fretted about the morrow
他简单地为今日狂欢 He simply reveled in today
把每一个瞬间都活得精彩 Living each moment to the fullest
他从哪里来... Where did he come from...
他触动了我们的心灵却消失得无影无踪... He who touched our hearts and vanished...
他去了哪里.. 我们去找他吧 Where did he go... let's find him
在炽热的阳光下，他是一块树荫... In scorching Sun, he was like a patch of shade...
在无尽的沙漠中，他是一片绿洲... In an endless desert, like an oasis...
在破碎的心灵中，他是一阵甘霖 On a bruised heart, like soothing balm was he
我们困在井底，恐惧着 Afraid, we stayed confined in the well
他在大河嬉戏，无畏惧 Fearless, he frolicked in the river
游向大浪他毫不犹豫 Never hesitating to swim against the tide
像朵云他孤独地游荡 He wandered lonesome as a cloud
.. 而他，曾是我们最棒的朋友 ... Yet he was our dearest friend
他去了哪里.. 我们去找他吧 Where did he go... let's find him
兰彻 Rancho
昂史奥格斯 刹玛德斯 忏查特 Ranchhoddas Shamaldas Chanchad
他就像他的名字一样独一无二 He was as unique as his name
自出生起我们就被教导--生活是场赛跑 From birth we were taught - Life is a race
跑快点，不然你就被别人踩倒 Run fast or you 'll be trampled
甚至为了出生，都得跑过另外3亿个精子 Even to be born, one had to race 300 million sperms
1978年，我5月15号下午出生了 1978. I was born at 5.15 pm
5月16号，我爸宣布 At 5.1 6, my father announced
我儿子将是一个工程师--技术工程师法汉 库雷希.B My son will be an engineer. - Farhan Qureshi. B.Tech. Engineer
我的命运就这样被盖好章了 And my fate was sealed
而我想成为什么.. 没人问过 What I wanted to be... no one asked
和拉朱拉斯托吉、昂史奥格斯 忏查特 一屋 Raju Rastogi... Ranchhoddas Chanchad
房间号是什么？ Room number?
D-26 D-26
跟我来 C'mon
我叫曼 莫汉（Man Mohan），简称MM I'm Man Mohan. MM
那些工程师都叫我毫米(MM) These engineers call me Millimeter
你们可以找我要鸡蛋，面包，牛奶，洗衣服 For eggs, bread, milk, laundry
代写日志，抄作业 finishing journals, copying assignments
我是你们的人 价钱固定，拒绝还价 I'm your guy. Fixed rates. No bargaining
哎，等下，这个拿着下 Hey wait, hold this
来见见千字节, 兆字节还有它们的妈妈京字节 Meet Kilobyte, Megabyte, and their mother Gigabyte
放心，拍吧 --它们一家都不咬人的 Go ahead, click - this family doesn't bite
看看他...有一个惧怕神灵的灵魂 Check him out... another God-fearing soul
- 你好，我是法汉 库雷希 - 我叫拉朱拉斯托吉 Hi. Farhan Qureshi - I'm Raju Rastogi
别担心 Don't worry
这里呆几天他就不信神了 a few days here and hell lose faith in God
那时挂在墙上的就是光屁小孩了，他会说-- Then naked babes will be on the wall, and he'll say -
哦，神啊，再给我次和她在一起的机会吧 Oh God, give me one chance with her
哎，请你出去 Get out of here
4块钱，一个袋子2块 Four bucks. Two per bag
5块的，不用找了 Here's five. Keep the change
多谢老板！作为回报，找你1块建议-- Thanks boss. For your tip, here's one in return -
今晚穿上你最好的内裤 Wear your best underwear tonight
为什么呢？ Why?
陛下，您真伟大 Your Majesty, thou art great
请接受这微薄的供奉吧 Accept this humble offering
哈.. 这个是个猛男 Ha... here's a He-Man
这块多漂亮，可爱又结实 What a pretty piece. Cute and compact
这是个校园传统--在第一天 A campus tradition - On Day 1...
新生必须只穿着内裤 Freshmen must pay their respects to Seniors
向高年级的致敬 in their underwear
那时我们第一次见到兰彻 This is when we first saw Rancho
蜘蛛侠 Spiderman
蝙蝠侠 Batman
又一块新鲜的肉来啦 Fresh meat
向你问候啦，把裤子脱下，盖个章吧 Greetings. Drop your pants, get stamped
名字？ Name?
“昂史奥格斯 刹玛德斯 忏查特” 'Ranchhoddas Shamaldas Chanchad'
真拗口，得好好教育下 What a mouthful Needs serious cramming
快点 -- 脱裤 Come on - pants off
傻了么？ Being stubborn?
湿裤子穿着不好，小鬼，脱了吧 Wet pants not good, kiddo. Take them off
- Aal izz well - 什么东西？ Aal izz well - What's that?
Aal izz Well Aal izz Well
他在说什么？ What did he say?
谁来告诉他，嘿，詹姆斯-邦德 Someone tell him. Hey James Bond
让他听懂话 Make him understand
把裤子脱了，不然它们就尿你身上 Take off your pants or they are going to piss on you
嘿 007，说印地语会害羞啊？ Hey 007! Ashamed to speak Hindi?
对不起啊，我生在乌干达，又是在本地治理念书的 Sorry sir, I was born in Uganda, studied in Pondicherry
所以印地语说得有点不好 so little slow in Hindi
那就慢慢解释，不着急 So explain slowly. No hurry
冷了吗？ Feeling cold?
脱下底裤 Pray undress
否则他将对你进行“尿液排出”动作 or he'll do 'urine-expulsion' on you
把尿尿叫“尿液排出” Calls pissing 'urine-expulsion'
真是个语言学家，在这个工程师聚集地里 A true linguist in the land of engineers !
嘿，快出来 Hey, come out of there
出来啊，不然... Come out or...
对你的门进行“尿液排出”动作 or I'll do 'urine-expulsion' on your door
数十下还不出来 If you aren't out by the count of ten
我就整个学期对你的门进行“尿液排出”动作了 I'll do 'urine-expulsion' on your door all semester
一 One
二 Two
三 Three
四 Four
五 Five
六 Six
七 Seven
八 Eight
九 Nine
十 Ten
盐水是电的良导体，八年级物理 Salt water is a great conductor of electricity. 8th Grade Physics
我们都学过，他运用了 We had studied it. He applied it
彬儒博士曾是帝国理工的主任 Dr. Viru Sahastrabuddhe was the Director of ICE
学生们都叫他病毒，电脑病毒 Students called him Virus, computer Virus
病毒来啦，还带着他的蛋 Virus on the way, with eggs
新生都被召集了，快下来 Freshmen are summoned. Come quickly
病毒是我们见过最爱争强的人 Virus was the most competitive man we had ever seen
他不能容忍任何人在他前头 He couldn 't bear anyone getting ahead of him
为节省时间，他的衬衫都有魔术贴的 To save time, his shirts had Velcro
而且他的领结都有钩子 and his ties had hooks
他训练自己的脑子能同时双手书写 He'd trained his mind to write with both hands simultaneously
每天下午2点钟他打个7又1/2分钟的盹 Everyday at 2 pm he took a 7 1/2 minute power nap
同时开着歌剧作为催眠曲 with an opera as lullaby
戈文, 他的男仆, 按他指令 Govind, his valet, had instructions
为他做着低产出的活，比如刮胡子，剪指甲等 to carry out all unproductive tasks such as shaving, nail-cutting etc
- 这是什么? - 鸟窝，先生 What is this? - Sir, nest
- 是谁的？ - 杜鹃的窝 Whose? - A koel bird's nest, sir
错！ Wrong
杜鹃从来不自己做巢 A koel bird never makes her own nest
它们总是在别人窝里下蛋 She lays her eggs in other nests
入侵别家后，它们怎么做？ And when they hatch, what do they do?
它们把别家里的蛋从巢里推下去 They push the other eggs out of the nest
竞争结束 Competition over
它们生来就是杀手，这是天性 Their life begins with murder. That's nature
竞争或死亡 Compete or die
你们也就像是杜鹃鸟 You also are like the koel birds
这些就是你们推下去的蛋，最终来到帝国理工 And these are the eggs you smashed to get into ICE
别忘了，帝国理工每年收到40万份申请 Don't forget, ICE gets 400,000 applications a year
而只有200份通过--就是你们 and only 200 are selected - You
这些呢？完蛋了 一堆破蛋 And these? Finished. Broken eggs
孩子们.. 他申请了3年 My son... he tried for three years
被拒 每次都是 Rejected. Every time
记着，生活就是赛跑 Remember, life is a race
你要跑不快，就被别人踩倒 If you don't run fast, you'll get trampled
让我给你们说个有趣的故事 Let me tell you a very interesting story
这是一支太空笔 This is an astronaut pen
钢笔 圆珠笔在太空中都不管用 Fountain pens and ballpoint pens don't work in outer space
所以科学家们耗资百万发明了这种笔 So scientists spent millions to invent this pen
它可以以任何角度，在任何温度，于零重力下书写 It can write at any angle, in any temperature, in zero gravity
曾经某天，我还是个学生的时候 One day, when I was a student
我们研究所的主任叫到我 the Director of our institute called me
他说，“彬儒-萨斯布迪 ”我说，“在，先生” He said, 'Viru Sahastrabuddhe.' I said, 'Yes sir'
“跟我来！” 我很害怕 'Come here ' I got scared
他给我看了这支笔 He showed me this pen
他说，“这是杰出的象征，” He said, 'This is a symbol of excellence'
“我把它交给你 ” 'I give it to you'
“当你遇上一个和你一样杰出的学生的时候，” 'When you come across an extraordinary student like yourself
“把它传给他 ” ...pass it onto him'
32年了，我一直在等这个学生出现 For 32 years, I've been waiting for that student
但很不幸 But no luck
这里有谁，想努力赢得这支笔？ Anyone here, who'll strive to win this pen?
好，把手放下 Good. Put your hands down
要我写在布告栏上吗？说了把手放下 Shall I post it on the notice board? Hands down
我有个问题，先生 One question, sir
先生, 如果钢笔什么的在太空不管用 Sir, if pens didn't work in outer space
宇航员为什么不用铅笔呢？ why didn't the astronauts use a pencil?
她们可以省下这几百万的 They'd have saved millions
关于这个我之后找你 I will get back to you on this
他晚上电高年级生的私处 He zaps a Senior's privates at night
白天敢碰触主任，最好离他远点 fingers the Director in the day. Best avoid him
你痿了病毒的锐气 You deflated Virus's erection
陛下，您真伟大，请接受这微薄的供奉吧 Your Majesty, thou art great. Accept this humble offering
别处逛去，你不上学么？ Buzz off. You don't have school?
谁给我交学费？你爸吗？ Who'll pay for it? Your pop?
- 别扯我爸！ - 放松 Keep off my dad ! - Relax
学不是非要学费才能上的，只要一身校服就行了 For school you don't need tuition money, just a uniform
选个学校，买身校服，溜进课堂 Pick a school, buy the uniform, slip into class
里面小鬼多的是，没人会注意你的 In that sea of kids, no one will notice
- 被抓了怎么办？ - 换身新的校服，去别的学校 If I get caught? - Then new uniform, new school
看到没？他和别人不一样... See that? - He was different...
他在哪里都改变传统 He challenged conventions at every stage
像只心灵自由的小鸟落在病毒的巢里 A free-spirited bird had landed in Virus's nest
我们像是机器人，盲目地执行教授们的指令 We were robots, blindly following our professors ' commands
他是时唯一一个不是台机器的人 He was the only one who was not a machine
什么 是 机器？ What is a machine?
你笑什么？ Why're you smiling?
先生，学习工程小时候就是我的梦想 Sir, to study Engineering was a childhood dream
我终于来到了这里，非常开心 I'm so happy to be here finally
没必要那么开心吧？定义一下“机器” No need to be so happy. Define a machine
机器就是帮我们减少人力的东西 A machine is anything that reduces human effort
请你说详细一点？ Will you please elaborate?
任何使工作变得简单或者节省时间的东西，就是机器 Anything that simplifies work, or saves time, is a machine
今天热了，按个按钮，一阵凉风 It's a warm day, press a button, get a blast of air
--电扇.. 是机器 The fan... A machine
和很远的朋友说话--电话.. 是机器 Speak to a friend miles away. The telephone... A machine !
每秒钟百万次计算--计算器.. 是机器 Compute millions in seconds. The calculator... A machine!
我们身边都是机器 We're surrounded by machines
从笔尖到裤子拉链--都是机器 From a pen's nib to a pants' zip - all machines
一上一下一秒钟，上，下，上，下... Up and down in a second. Up, down, up, down...
定义是什么？ What is the definition?
我刚说了啊，先生 I just gave it to you, sir
你考试的时候就这样写啊？这就是机器--上，下... You'll write this in the exam? This is a machine - up, down...
白痴 还有谁来？ Idiot Anybody else?
好 Yes?
先生，机器就是以相对运动受限制的方式 Sir, machines are any combination of bodies so connected
连接起来的任何部件组合 that their relative motions are constrained
由此力和位移得以传动和转变 and by which means, force and motion may be transmitted
例如螺丝和螺母的组合，或绕支点运动的杠杆， and modified as a screw and its nut, or a lever arranged
绕轴转动的滑轮，等等 to turn about a fulcrum or a pulley about its pivot, etc
尤其是指一种无论简单或复杂， especially, a construction, more or less complex
由运动部件或者 consisting of a combination of moving parts, or
或诸如轮子，杠杆，偏心轮等简单机械元件组成的结构 simple mechanical elements, as wheels, levers, cams etc
太棒了 Wonderful
完美，请坐 Perfect. Please sit down
谢谢 Thank you
可是先生，我说的和他是一个意思，用了更简单的语言 But sir, I said the same thing, in simple language
你那么喜欢简单语言，去上艺术或商学院去 If you prefer simple language, join an Arts and Commerce college
但是先生，总得要让人知道意思啊 But sir, one must get the meaning too
盲目地教我们书呆子式的定义有什么意义么？ What's the point of blindly cramming a bookish definition
你以为自己比书聪明啊？ You think you're smarter than the book?
用课本上的定义，先生，如果你还想过我这门的话 Write the textbook definition, mister, if you want to pass
- 可是还写其它书上... - 请出去 But there are other books... - Get out!
为什么？ Why?
用简单的语言说--滚 In simple language - Out
白痴 Idiot
好，我们刚说了机器... So, we were discussing the machine...
怎么又回来了？ Why're you back?
我东西忘了 I forgot something
什么东西？ What?
一种记录，分析，总结，组织， Instruments that record, analyze, summarize, organize
讨论及解释信息的，有插图或无插图的 debate and explain information that are illustrated, non-illustrated
硬抄或平装的，加套或不加套的 hard-bound, paperback, jacketed, non-jacketed
包含有前言，介绍，目录表，索引的 with foreword, introduction, table-of-contents, index
用以增长知识，加深理解 that are intended for the enlightenment, understanding
提升并教育人类大脑的装置 enrichment, enhancement and education of the human brain
该装置需用视觉，有时候触碰的感官形式使用 through the sensory route of vision, sometimes touch
你说的是什么？ What do you mean?
书，先生 Books, sir
我书忘拿了，可以去拿么？ I forgot my books. May I?
你就不能说简单点？ Couldn't you ask simply?
刚才我试过了，先生，可就是不管用 I tried earlier, sir. It simply didn't work
教授多数时候不让兰彻进来.. 偶尔会 Professors kept Rancho mostly out... seldom in
被扔出课堂后，他就旁听别的课 When thrown out of one class, he'd slip into another
他说--不管是一年级还是四年级，都是知识，学就是了 He said - First year or fourth year, it's knowledge. Just grab it
他不同于我们任何一个 He was unlike any of us
我们每天早上都为了一个浴室争抢 We fought for a shower every morning
他却哪里有水哪里洗澡 He'd bathe wherever he found water
早上好，先生 Morning, sir
机器是他的热情所在 Machines were his passion
他一看到机器，就拆开 When he spotted them, he opened them
有些他能装回去... Some he could re-assemble...
有些没能装回去 some he couldn 't
还有一个人，和他很像 There was another, just like him
乔伊洛沃 Joy Lobo
先生，对不起先生 Sir. Excuse me, sir
乔伊洛沃 Mr. Joy Lobo
先生，我可不可以知道典礼的日期... Sir, if I could know the convocation dates...
怎么？ Why?
我爸要订火车票 Dad wants to make train reservations
我是村子里第一个工程师，大家都想参加 I'm the first engineer from my village. Everyone wants to attend
这样啊，那打给你爸 In that case, call your dad
快一点，不要浪费我时间 Please hurry up. Don't waste my time
喂 Hello
爸，主任有话和你说 Dad, the Director wants to speak to you
乔伊 Joy
洛沃先生, 你儿子今年毕不了业了 Mr. Lobo, your son won't graduate this year
怎么了，先生？ What happened, sir?
他没按期完成 He has violated all deadlines
洛沃先生, 他做的是一个不现实的东西 Mr. Lobo, it's an unrealistic project
一种没意义的直升机 He is making some nonsense helicopter
我建议你不要订票了 对不起 I suggest you don't book your tickets. I'm so sorry
- 先生，我都快完成了，先生 - 你的项目做好了没有？ Sir, I am this close, sir - Is your project ready?
- 你的项目做好了没有？ - 先生，看一眼吧，求求你了 Is your project ready? - Sir, see it once, please
提交吧，我们会考虑的 Submit it, and we'll consider
- 先生，就再要一点点延期... - 为什么，凭什么我等你? Sir, a small extension... - Why, why should I?
自从我爸中风后，我2个月不能集中做这个了 After dad's stroke, I couldn't focus for two months
你有没有停止吃饭？ Did you stop eating?
没 No
停止洗澡？ Stopped bathing?
那你为什么要停止学习？ So why stop studying?
先生，我就快好了，就看一眼，求你了... Sir, I'm very close. See it once, please...
洛沃先生 Mr. Lobo
星期天下午，我儿子从火车上摔下死了 Sunday afternoon, my son fell off a train and died
星期一早上我就上了一门课，所以别给我那种借口 Monday morning, I taught a class. So don't give me that nonsense
我可以给你同情，但不是时间 I can give you sympathy, not an extension
先生...要做好了... Sir... I'm very close...
我活了一辈子 Lifelong I lived
做了一辈子别人 The life of another
就这么一次 For just one moment
让我做我自己 Let me live as I...
我活了一辈子 Lifelong I lived
做了一辈子别人 The life of another
就这么一次 For just one moment
让我做我自己 Let me live as I...
给我些阳光 给我些雨露 Give me some sunshine Give me some rain
再给我个机会 我要再次成长 Give me another chance I wanna grow up once again
给我些阳光 给我些雨露 Give me some sunshine Give me some rain
再给我个机会 我要再次成长 Give me another chance I wanna grow up once again
这个门弄出个这么棒的设计 Dude's come up with an amazing design
直升机上一个无线摄像头 A wireless camera atop a helicopter
可以用来交通监管，安全...哇！ Can be used for traffic updates, security... Wow!
可是病毒说这个是不实用的设计，飞不起来的 But Virus said it's an impractical design, it won't fly
可以飞的，我们让它飞起来 It will fly We'll make it fly
先别告诉乔伊啊，这是个惊喜 Don't tell Joy. It'll be a surprise
到时候我们把它飞到他窗前拍下他的反应 We'll fly it up to his window and capture his reaction
我们帮他做项目，谁帮我们做呢？ If we work on his project, who'll work on ours?
考试，口试，测验--每学期42门要考啊 Tests, vivas, quizzes - 42 exams per semester
哥们，你太容易担心害怕了 You scare easily, bro
把你手，放到心上，然后说，“Aal izz well” Take your hand, put it over your heart, and say, 'Aal izz well'
- “什么都好”? - Aal izz well All is well? - Aal izz well
神圣领袖 昂史奥格斯的智慧之言 Words of wisdom from His Holiness Guru Ranchhoddas
我们村以前有个守夜老人 We had an old watchman in our village
夜巡的时候，他会大喊“Aal izz well” On night patrol, he'd call out, 'Aal izz well'
我们就睡得很香，后来还是发生盗窃了 And we slept peacefully. Then there was a theft
然后我们知道他晚上什么都看不到 and we learned that he couldn't see at night
他就只是在喊“Aal izz well”，而我们就感到安全了 He'd just yell 'Aal izz well', and we felt secure
那天我就知道了，这个心啊，很容易害怕的 That day I understood this heart scares easily
你得哄哄它 You have to trick it
不管碰到多大的问题，就告诉你的心“Aal izz well，好兄弟” However big the problem, tell your heart, 'All is well, pal'
那能解决问题么？ That resolves the problem?
不能啊，但你得到了面对问题的勇气 No. But you gain courage to face it
学着点，兄弟，在这里我们将非常需要它 Learn it up, bro. We're gonna really need it here
当生活转得失去控制，就卷起你的嘴唇 When life spins out of control Just let your lips roll
卷起你的嘴唇，一哨吹走烦恼 Let your lips roll And whistle away the toll
当生活转得失去控制，就卷起你的嘴唇 When life spins out of control Just let your lips roll
卷起你的嘴唇，一哨吹走烦恼 Just let your lips roll And whistle away the toll
嘢 - 什么都好... Yell - All is Well...
小鸡们不知鸡蛋的命运 The chicken's clueless about the egg's fate
是破壳而出还是被做成了蛋卷 Will it hatch or become an omelette
没人知道未来是什么 No one knows what the future holds
卷起你的嘴唇，一哨吹走烦恼 So let your lips roll And whistle away the toll
- 一哨吹走烦恼 - 嘢 - 什么都好... Whistle away the toll Yell - All is Well
嘿 哥们 - 什么都好 Hey bro - All is Well
嘿 朋友 - 什么都好 Hey mate - All is Well
嘿 兄弟 - 什么都好 Hey bro - All is Well
困惑困惑更多的困惑 没有任何解决的出路 Confusion and more confusion No sign of any solution
- 啊.. 终于有个办法了 - 可等等.. 我的困惑是什么呢？ Ah... finally a solution But wait... what was the question ?
如果那充满畏惧的胆小心灵即将死去 If the timid heart with fear is about to die
那么就用这个简单的谎话哄哄它吧 Then con it bro, with this simple lie
心就是一个白痴，它轻易就相信那句 Heart's an idiot, it will fall under that spell
卷起你的嘴唇，一哨吹走烦恼 Let your lips roll And whistle away the toll
- 一哨吹走烦恼 - 嘢 - 什么都好... Whistle away the toll Yell - All is Well
嘿 哥们 - 什么都好 Hey bro - All is Well
嘿 朋友 - 什么都好 Hey mate - All is Well
嘿 兄弟 - 什么都好 Hey bro - All is Well
痛饮吹了奖学金 却驱不走我的低落 Blew the scholarship on booze But that did not dispel my blues
神香点照亮我的苦命，而神灵们却不见踪影 Holy incense lit up my plight And yet God's nowhere in sight
小羊羔们不知道什么将被注定 The lamb is clueless for what it's destined
是被做成烤肉还是剁成肉酱 Will it be served on skewers or simply minced
没人知道未来是什么 No one knows what the future holds
卷起你的嘴唇，一哨吹走烦恼 So let your lips roll And whistle away the toll
- 一哨吹走烦恼 - 嘢 - 什么都好.. Whistle away the toll Yell - All is Well
嘿 哥们 - 什么都好 Hey bro - All is Well
嘿 朋友 - 什么都好 Hey mate - All is Well
嘿 兄弟 - 什么都好 Hey bro - All is Well
当生活转得失去控制，就卷起你的嘴唇 When life spins out of control Just let your lips roll
卷起你的嘴唇，一哨吹走烦恼 Just let your lips roll And whistle away the toll
什么都好 All is Well
小鸡们不知鸡蛋的命运 The chicken's clueless about the egg's fate
是破壳而出还是被做成了蛋卷 Will it hatch or become an omelette
没人知道未来是什么 No one knows what the future holds
卷起你的嘴唇，一哨吹走烦恼 So let your lips roll And whistle away the toll
一哨吹走烦恼 Whistle away the toll
有了，有了！ Eureka ! Eureka
嘢 - 什么都好 Yell - All is Well
嘿 小鸡小姐 - 什么都好 Hey Mrs. Chicken - All is Well
嘿 小羊先生 - 什么都好 Hey Mr. Lamb - All is Well
嘿 兄弟 - 什么都好 Hey bro - All is Well
嘿, 把它升到乔伊的窗口 Hey, take it up to Joy's window
升高点 Take it higher
看 消音器啊 - 一个裸男 Look at Silencer - the nude dude
乔伊, 快出来 Joy, come out
到窗户边上 Come to the window
乔伊, 往外看啊 Joy, look outside
好消息，先生 Good news, sir
警察和乔伊的父亲都没头绪 The police and Joy's father have no clue
大家都认为这是一起自杀 Everyone thinks this is suicide
尸检报告 - The post mortem report -
死亡原因：气管受到高强度压力 Cause of Death: Intense pressure on windpipe
导致窒息 resulting in choking
大家都只认为他喉咙上的绳子压力杀死了他 All think the pressure on the jugular killed him
他过去四年来的精神压力呢？ What about the mental pressure for the last four years?
报告上却没写 That's missing in the report
工程师们是一群聪明的人 Engineers are a clever bunch
但他们还没造出测量精神压力的仪器 They haven't made a machine to measure mental pressure
如果造出来了，大家就会知道... If they had, all would know...
这不是自杀.. 是谋杀 this isn't suicide... it's murder
你竟敢把乔伊的自杀归罪于我？ How dare you blame me for Joy's suicide?
作为一名学生不能处理好压力，这是我们的错吗？ If one student can't handle pressure, is it our fault?
生活充满了压力，那你总是怪罪别人么？ Life is full of pressures. Will you always blame others?
我不是怪罪与你，先生 我怪制度 I don't blame you, sir. I blame the system
看看这些统计 --印度自杀数排行第一 Look at these statistics - India ranks No.1 in suicides
每90分钟就有一名学生自杀 Every 90 minutes, a student attempts suicide
自杀是比疾病还大的杀手 Suicide is a bigger killer than disease
有些东西严重有错，先生 Something's terribly wrong, sir
别人怎样我不敢说 I can't speak for the rest
但这里是全国最好的的大学之一 but this is one of the finest colleges in the country
我掌管这里已经32年了 I've run this place for 32 years
从排名28到现在的第一名 We were ranked 28th. Now we're No.1
这又说明了什么？ What's the point, sir?
在这里他们不讨论新想法或发明 Here they don't discuss new ideas or inventions
讨论的却是成绩，工作，移民美国 They discuss grades, jobs, settling in the USA
他们教我们怎样拿高分，却不教我们工程 They teach how to get good scores. They don't teach Engineering
你是在教我应该怎么教书是吧？ Now you will teach me how to teach?
不是的，先生，我... No sir, I...
先生，我的报纸... Sir, my paper...
瓦迪阿森登, 请坐好 Vaidyanathan, please sit down
这里有一个自称是教授的人 Here is a self-proclaimed professor
觉得自己比我们高质量的教师还优秀 who thinks he is better than our highly qualified teachers
昂史奥格斯 忏查特教授将给我们教教工程 Professor Ranchhoddas Chanchad will teach us Engineering
我们可没有一天的时间 We do not have all day
你们将有30秒的时间定义这几个术语 You have 30 seconds to define these terms
你们可以翻书 You may refer to your books
找到答案了请举手 Raise your hand if you get the answer
看看谁最快谁最慢 Let's see who comes first, who comes last
你们现在.. 开始 Your time starts... now
时间到 Time up
时间到了，先生 Time up, sir
没人知道答案？ No one got the answer?
现在把你们的时间倒退1分钟 Now rewind your life by a minute
当我问这个问题的时候，有人感到兴奋吗？好奇吗？ When I asked this question, were you excited? Curious?
为你们将学到新的东西感到激动吗？ Thrilled that you'd learn something new?
有没有？.. 先生？ Anyone? ... Sir?
没有 你们都进入了疯狂的竞赛 No. You all got into a frantic race
即使你第一个找到了答案，这种方法又有什么用？ What's the use of such methods, even if you come first
你的知识会增加吗？不会，增加的只是压力 Will your knowledge increase? No, just the pressure
这是一所大学，不是压力锅 This is a college, not a pressure cooker
有鞭子在，就算是一只马戏团的狮子也得学会坐下 Even a circus lion learns to sit on a chair in fear of the whip
可你们只会说这狮子“训练得不错”，不会说“教育得很好” But you call such a lion 'well trained', not 'well educated'
喂！ Hello !
这可不是哲学课，解释下那两个词就行了 This is not a philosophy class. Just explain those two words
先生，这两个词不存在 Sir, these words don't exist
其实是我朋友的名字 法汉和拉朱 These are my friends' names. Farhan and Raju
安静 Quiet
荒谬！这就是你教工程的方法？ Nonsense! Is this how you'll teach Engineering?
先生，我不是在教你工程 Sir, I wasn't teaching you Engineering
你可是工程学的专家 You're an expert at that
我是在教你...怎么去教 I was teaching you... how to teach
而我相信总有一天你会学会的 And I'm sure one day you'll learn
因为我可不像你，我从不放弃后进生 because unlike you, I never abandon my weak students
再见，先生 Bye, sir
安静 Quiet
说了 安静！ Quiet, I said
我很抱歉地通知你，你的儿子... I regret to inform you that your son...
法汉.. 拉朱... Farhan... Raju...
交上了坏朋友 has fallen into bad company
如不采取紧急挽救措施，他们的未来就毁了 Without urgent corrective steps, his future will be ruined
病毒的信就像原子弹一样投递到我们家 Virus 's letters dropped on our homes like atom bombs
广岛和长崎扎进一片凄凉 Hiroshima and Nagasaki plunged into gloom
我们的父母叫我们回来--一片责骂 Our parents invited us - for a dressing down
进来 Come in
看到了？ See that?
我们就用得起一台空调 We could afford just one air-conditioner
把他装到法汉的房里，让他舒心地学习 We put it in Farhan's room, so he could study in comfort
我没买车，就一助动车过活 I didn't buy a car. I manage with a scooter
我们把所有的钱都投向了教育法汉 We put all our money into Farhan's education
我们为了法汉的将来牺牲了我们的舒适幸福，你懂不？ We sacrificed our comforts for Farhan's future. U nderstand?
这些照片你拍的吗，法汉? You took these pictures, Farhan?
他有段时间有这没用的嗜好 He had that useless obsession for a while
到处跑去拍动物 Went around taking pictures of animals
就想成为野生动物摄影家 Wanted to be a wildlife photographer
儿子，那年你考多少？ Son, what was your score that year?
91% 91%
听到没？从94%直线下降到91% Hear that? Straight drop from 94% to 91%
你觉得好笑？ You find it funny?
不是的先生，对不起，我只是对这些照片感到惊讶 No sir, sorry. I'm just amazed at the photos
为什么要他做工程师而不是野生动物摄影家？ Why make him an engineer... Why not a wildlife photographer?
够了 Enough
我恭敬地请求你--不要毁了我儿子的未来 I humbly request you - Don't ruin my son's future
饭在桌上了，孩子们，来吃吧 Food's on the table, boys. C'mon
你如果再来，可要和我们一起进餐了 If you ever visit again, do eat with us
爸不让我们吃饭... Dad denied us a meal...
为了有东西填饱肚子... So, to fill our bellies with food...
也为了更多斥责填满耳朵，我们来到拉朱的家里 and ears with more reprimands, we reached Raju's house
拉朱的家让我们直接回到了50年代的黑白电影里 Raju's house was straight out of a 50's black and white film
一个狭小，黑暗的房间... A small, dingy room...
一位瘫痪在床的父亲... a paralyzed father...
一位不断咳嗽的母亲... a coughing mother...
一个嫁不出去的姐姐 and an unwed sister
一张冒出弹簧的沙发... A sofa sprouting springs...
24小时不间断供水--从房顶漏下 a 24 hour water supply - from the leaking roof
母亲是一位学校退休教师及不倦的抱怨者 Mother was a retired school teacher and a tireless complainer
父亲曾是位邮递员 Father was once a postmaster
瘫痪部分停止了他的身体... Paralysis shut down his body partly...
完全停止了他的薪水 他的姐姐 his salary completely. And the sister...
凯茉已经28了，他们要求嫁妆要有一辆轿车才娶她 Kammo's turned 28. They demand a car in dowry
你要不好好学习好好挣钱，她怎么嫁得出去？ If you don't study and earn, how will she marry?
要秋葵么？ Some okra?
秋葵现在都12块一斤了，花菜10块 Okra is now 12 /- per kilo, cauliflower is 10/-
这简直是明抢 It's daylight robbery
要是收到你学校的警告，我们吃什么？ What will we eat if we get warnings from your college?
妈！ Mom!
来点农家奶酪？ Cottage cheese?
农家奶酪应该放到珠宝店里卖，摆在天鹅绒盒子里 Cottage cheese should be sold at the jewelers, in velvet pouches
- 农家奶酪要吗？ - 不，不，不用了 Cottage cheese? - No, no, it's ok
妈，别说了 Mom, please
那好，我闭嘴 Alright, I'll shut up
为这个家挣钱，还被婢女一样奴隶着 Earn for the family, slave like a maid
然后就知道沉默 and then take the vow of silence
不让我向我儿子诉苦，向他朋友啊？ If not with my son, with whom do I share my woes - his friends?
嘿 拉朱 Hey Raju
我们进退两难 We were in a huge dilemma
我们是安慰我们的朋友还是他的母亲？ Do we comfort our friend or console his mom ?
算了，我们想，还是吃我们的农家奶酪吧 Screw it, we thought, let's focus on the cottage cheese
就是他的湿疹膏也要55块了 Even his eczema cream costs 55 /- now
再吃点烤肉？ Another roti?
不用，谢谢，我们够了 No, thank you. We're through
秋葵12块，花菜10块 Okra for 12 /- - Cauliflower for 10 /-
至少你们还吃了顿 At least you were offered a meal
不像你那虐待狂老爸，“希特勒”库雷希 Unlike your sadistic dad... 'Hitler' Qureshi
你妈就是特丽萨嬷嬷...给我们吃“湿疹烤肉” And your mom is Mother Teresa... Feeding us 'eczema roti' !
- 别取笑我妈 - 好了，你们 Don't poke fun at my mom - Enough, you guys
我饿死了，我们出去吃 I'm famished. Let's eat out
- 月末啊现在，谁付钱？ - 特丽萨嬷嬷陛下？ It's month end. Who'll pay? His Mother Teresa?
出去吃呢，你不必带钱，一身礼服就行了，看... To eat out, you don't need money. Just a uniform. Look...
- 来不 - 走 C'mon - Come
- 晚上好 - 晚上好 Good evening, good evening
哦, 叔叔 Oh, U ncle
- 大瓶伏特加3瓶 - 半苏打，半水 Three large vodkas. - Half soda, half water
被抓到就死定了 If we're caught, we're dead
- 冷盘有什么？ - 要双倍菜量的 What's for starters? - Get double portions
可以走开了，放些有劲的音乐 Leave this here and start some peppy music
皮娅, 你这戴的是什么？ Pia, what the hell!
干嘛你要戴这么一块古董级破烂？ Why're you wearing this ancient piece of junk?
人们会怎么议论--我的未婚妻... What'll people say - My fiancee...
一名前途无量的医生，却带着一块200块的便宜表 a doctor in the making, wearing a cheap, 200 /- watch
请你取下，谢谢 Please take it off. Thank you
嗨 帅哥 Hi handsome
嘿 姑妈，你看起来真不错 Hey Aunty. You're looking good
- 别忘了看我的配饰，亲爱的 - 红宝石？ Don't miss my set, darling - Rubies?
- 源自曼德勒 - 曼德勒.. 哇 From Mandalay - Mandalay... Wow
- 嘿，我们去和大卫聊聊吧 - 那当然 Hey, let's go meet David - Of course
对不起 Excuse me
怎么？ Yes?
送你花 Flowers
- 我可以取下你的眼镜吗？ - 为什么？ May I take the glass? - Why?
这样你就不会把它摔在我脸上啊 So you don't break it on my head
我干嘛要那样做？ Why would I do that?
因为我将给你三个建议 For the free advice I'll now impart
什么？ What?
别嫁那个混球 Don't marry that ass
什么？ Excuse me?
他不是个人，只是个标价条 He's not a human, he's a price tag
他将把你的生活变成牌子和价格的噩梦 He'll turn your life into a nightmare of brands and prices
他会毁了你的生活的，你的未来就完了 He'll ruin your life. Your future will be finished
演示给你看？ Want a demonstration?
容许我去打听她那双鞋的价钱？ Shall I find out the price of his shoes?
我不用问他，他自己就会宣布的 I won't ask. He'll announce it himself
这怎么回事...薄荷酱撒我300美元的鞋上 What the hell... Mint sauce on my $300 shoes !
为你的生活，逃开吧 这是免费建议，听不听随你 Run for your life It's free advice. Take it or leave it
正品意大利皮革，手工制作 Genuine Italian leather - hand-stitched
爸，他们是你请来的客人吗？ Dad, are they your guests?
我的学生啊，他们在这里干嘛？ My students. What're they doing here?
等下，爸 Hold on, Dad
这些豆子闻起来真好吃 These beans smell great
- 烤肉放不下了 - 对上去就行了 No room for roti - Just pile it on
- 嗨 - 嘿 Hi - Hey
刚才真是大开眼界，非常谢谢你 That was an eye-opener. Thank you so much
那不过是我的道德责任 It was my moral responsibility
我能再请你帮个小忙吗？ Can I ask you for little more help?
我爸不同意我终止这个婚约 Dad won't let me break off this engagement
你解释得那么好，可不可以也给他演示一下？ You explain so well. Can you give him a demo too?
当然可以，拉朱，薄荷酱给我 Certainly. Raju, the mint sauce
你真是太好了 You're really sweet
- 你爸在哪里呢？ - 就在你后面 Where is your daddy? - Right behind you
Aal izz well Aal izz well
为你的生活，逃开吧 这是免费建议，听不听随你 Run for your life It's free advice. Take it or leave it
你们在这里干嘛呢？ What're you doing here?
我们给夫妇俩带上了这些礼物 We'll hand these gifts to the couple
我为你代劳吧，这是我姐姐的婚礼 I'll do that for you. It's my sister's wedding
姐姐？ Sister?
你一共几个女儿啊？ Sir, what's the sum total of your daughters?
空的，没礼金支票 Empty. No gift cheques
支票忘了么, 拉朱.. 法汉? Forgot the cheques, Raju ... Farhan?
我们没邀请你们，他们是新郎那边的客人吧 We didn't invite you, you must be from the groom's side
不是的，先生，我们来这里是做科学调查的 No sir, we're here as the emissaries of science
怎么做？解释下？ How? Can you explain?
爸，他解释水平超好的 我肯定他会给我们演示一下的 Dad, he explains superbly. I'm sure he'll give us a demo
没错吧？ Won't you?
是这样的，德里的停电状况太频繁... Well, Delhi has plenty of power cuts that...
扰乱婚礼庆典 disrupt wedding celebrations
所以我想发明一个东西... So I thought of making an inverter that...
可以从客人们的汽车中取电的装置 draws power from guests' cars
我懂了 I see
哇 Wow
那你的那个发明在哪里呢？ So where's the inverter?
先生，设计已经完成了 Sir, the design is ready
设计放哪里了, 法汉? Where's the design, Farhan?
- 我把设计给你了啊 - 我又给拉朱了 I gave you the design - I gave it to Raju
拉朱, 设计呢？ Raju, design?
别管那设计了，我会做好给你看的 Never mind the design. I'll make the inverter and show you
你只会创造故事，不是发明 You can only invent stories, not an inverter
我会做出来的，我保证 I'll make one, I promise
而且我会以你的名字命名，毕竟它是... And I'll name it after you. After all, it was invented...
在你女儿的婚礼上发明的 因此它将是荣誉... at your daughter's wedding. So it'll be an honor...
法汉, 拉朱，明天来我办公室见我 Farhan, Raju. I'll see you in my office tomorrow
先生，这一盘多少钱？我们将偿还您 Sir, what was the cost per plate? We'll reimburse you
.. 分期还 ... in installments
- 我们保证不再“蹭”婚礼了 - 我自己的婚礼也不蹭 We'll never crash a wedding again - Not even my own
事实上，我甚至不结婚，他也不结 In fact, I won't even marry. Nor will he
呃...对，不结婚 Uh... right. No marriage
你们的父母也不该结婚 Your parents shouldn't have married either
这个世界就可以少喂养两个白痴了 The world would have to feed two less idiots
坐好 Sit!
看好 Pay attention
这是兰彻他爸的月收入 This is Ranchhoddas's father's monthly income
少几个零，还是客观的收入 Couple of zeroes less, and it's still a sizeable income
再少一个零，我就要有点担心了 But erase another zero, and I would worry a little
这不就是你爸的月收入吗，法汉？ Isn't that your father's income, Farhan?
是的，先生 Yes, sir
现在再擦掉个零... Now take away another zero...
这是你全家的月收入，拉朱拉斯托吉 and that's your family income, Raju Rastogi
非常让人担心啊 Big reason to worry
听我的建议把，换到查图尔 阿莫琳档的寝室去 Take my advice and shift into Chatur Ramalingam's room
那么多考试，和兰彻混一起你就肯定不及格了 Exams are here. Stay with Rancho and you're sure to fail
- 要刮个胡子吗？ - 不用，先生 Want a shave? - No, sir
那快消失 Then get lost!
拉朱, 这是病毒离间我们的一招，先拆后统 Raju, don't worry. This is Virus's move to split us. Divide and rule
我必须得担心 I have to worry
他给我们打分，我还要个好成绩换个好工作 He grades us, and I need good grades for a good job
我可不像你，有个有钱的老爸过活 Unlike you, I don't have a rich dad I can live off
别说了, 拉朱 Shut up, Raju
我们非得听他的废话吗？“Aal izz well” Must we follow all his hogwash? 'Aal izz well'
我不想和你一样...当他走狗 I won't be his flunky... like you
- 你快要过火了 - 不，我在定义过火 You're crossing the line - No, I'm drawing one
我有一个家要养活 I have a family to support
爸的药费榨干了我妈的退休金 Dad's medicines swallow up mom's pension
我姐不能结婚就是因为他们要求嫁妆里面有辆车 My sis can't marry because they want a car in dowry
我妈五年了都没买一件纱丽服 Mom hasn't bought a single saree in five years
别把你妈的衣服也扯进来 Now don't get your mom's wardrobe into the debate
对了，一般一年该买几件纱丽服算正常？ By the way, how many sarees per annum is reasonable?
不要拿我妈说笑话 Hey... no wisecracks about mom
我们全心去学习，但不是为了成绩 We'll study with all our heart, but not just for grades
引用句智者的话 - 学习为了成就而不是财富 To quote a Wise One - Study to be accomplished, not affluent
追求卓越，成功就会出其不意找上门 Follow excellence. And success will chase you, pants down
那个智者说的？神圣的领袖 昂史奥格斯？ Which Wise One says this? His Holiness Guru Ranchhoddas?
回你泥塘里烂着去吧 Go rot in the bogs
拉朱, 别紧张，我们会名列前茅的，没什么不可能的 Raju, don't stress. We'll top our class. Nothing is impossible
哦 是吗？ Oh yeah?
把牙膏挤回去 Shove this back into the tube
拉朱上了另一列火车 Raju got onto another train
他和查图尔的修行开始了，没错，说的就是修行，不是旅行 His travails with Chatur began. Yes, I mean travails, not travels
查图尔被称为“消音器” Chatur was called 'Silencer'
为加强记忆，他从江湖医生那里弄些药丸 To sharpen his memory, he popped pills from a local quack
结果老放无声 却致命的屁 And then let off silent... but lethal farts
不是我放的.. 拉朱？ I didn't do it... Raju?
他总是把坏事归别人头上 He always blamed others for the output
消音器一天苦读18小时 Silencer crammed 18 hours a day
考试前夜，他就让别人分心 On exam eve, he would distract others
他的信仰 - 得第一的路只有两条 His belief - There are only two ways of topping
提高自己的成绩 或是降低对手的成绩 Elevate your own grades or shrink your opponents' grades
兰彻决心打败消音器拯救拉朱... Rancho decided to subdue Silencer and rescue Raju...
用一个大师级的计划 with one master plan
我们的主任不知疲倦的服务.. “服务”意思是... Our Director has unceasingly served... 'Served' means...
别管什么意思，我会背下来的 Damn the meaning, I'll memorize it
查图尔是教师节大会的介绍演说人 Chatur was the introductory speaker at the Teachers' Day function
为了取悦病毒，他叫图书馆长写好演说... To impress Virus, he got his speech written by the librarian...
用高雅的印地语写 in highbrow Hindi
喂，稍等，查图尔, 你的电话 Hello. Hold on. Chatur, call for you
打印出来收好，我马上回来 Please collect the printout. I'll be right back
哦.. 我要做的是... Oh... the things I have to do...
杜贝先生, 主任惦记着您呢 Mr. Dubey, the Director was remembering you
- 真的？ - 是啊，就刚才 Really? - Yes. Just now
我马上去见他，把这个给查图尔 I'll see him right away. Give this to Chatur
- 喂，喂 - 喂，阿莫琳档先生吗？ Hello. Hello - Hello, Mr. Ramalingam?
是啊 Yes?
这里是警察局 I'm calling from the police station
- 你老家是乌干达对吧？ - 是的 Are you from Uganda? - Yes sir
- 你处在生命危险之中 - 啊？ 怎么说？ Your life is in danger - What? ... How?
仔细听，否则... Listen carefully, or else...
你一踏出校园即死 you'll get killed as you step out of the college gate
为什么？发生什么事了？ Why? What happened?
查图尔被缠着的时候 While Chatur was kept engaged
兰彻在他的演讲稿上改了几个词，比如说... Rancho altered a few words in his speech, for eg...
“服务”改成“整” 'served' became 'screwed'
先生你好？ Yes sir?
- 你是谁？ - 杜贝啊，图书馆长 Who are you? - Dubey. Librarian
我是终生员工, 先生 I'm permanent staff, sir
那恭喜 Congratulations
请等下，局长打进来了 Hold on a moment. The chief is on the other line
对不起，先生 Excuse me, sir
喂.. 刚才说到哪里了？ Yes... so where was I?
你说我出校门有可能被杀 You said I may die... outside the gate
没错，当你一出大门，你会看到一个交通信号灯 Right. As you get out of the gate, you'll see a traffic signal
交通信号灯 好的 Traffic signal. Ok
当红灯亮的时候，所有车都会停下 When it turns red, all the cars will halt
好，然后呢？ Ok. Then?
然后非常小心地过马路 Then cross the road with great caution
因为啊，孩子，在高峰期，如果有车撞到你，你就死定了 Because son, in rush hour if a car hits you, you're dead
胡扯么！这个我懂 What nonsense! I know that
你都懂啦？不错，那你安全了 You know that? Excellent. Then you're safe my boy
哎，消音器，图书馆长给你的 From the librarian, Silencer
不准那样叫我，忏查特 You don't call me that, Chanchad
嘿，主任说他没叫我 Hey. The Director said he didn't call for me
我说“叫”了么？我不过是说他“惦记”你了 Who said 'called'? I just said he 'remembered' you
惦记？你个混蛋 Remembered? Rascals
杰出的主席先生 Distinguished Mr. Chairperson
贵宾们，尊敬的教育部长 Chief guest, the Honorable Minister of Education
敬爱的老师 朋友们 respected teachers and friends
帝国理工现已嗖嗖超过了最高水平 ICE has now soared beyond the stratosphere
这只归功于一人 The credit goes solely to
彬儒博士，大家来点掌声 Dr. Viru Sahastrabuddhe. Give him a big hand
先生，虽然是他讲，稿子可是我写的啊 Sir, the voice is his but the words are mine
他是一个伟人 真的 你是伟人 He's a great guy, really you are
整整32年，他不知疲倦地整学生 For 32 years, he has unceasingly screwed students
他本来要说--“服务”学生的 He means - 'served' students
我相信他的努力会将继续 I'm sure his endeavors will continue
我们都惊讶于，一个人，怎么能够一生中 We are astounded at how one man, in one lifetime
整如此多的学生，整得如此之好 can screw so many, so well
他对自己严格的训练 练就了他的体力 With rigorous training he's built up his stamina
他把生命中的每一分钟都花在整学生上 He's spent every living minute just screwing
让我们学习他的方法吧 Let's replicate his methods
明天的帝国理工学生将遍布全球 Tomorrow ICE students will go across the globe
无论我们走向哪里，我们保证继续整 Wherever we go, we promise to screw
我们将全世界升起整人者的旗帜 We'll hoist this screwer's flag all over the world
我们将向世界展示我们整的水平 We'll show the world that our capacity to screw...
是本星球任何其它地方的学生... cannot be matched by any student...
所不能比拟的 anywhere on the planet
部长先生，晚上好 Mr. Minister. Good evening
您给予了我们这个机构所仅需的 You have given this institution what it sorely needs
原来是“资金” - 胸部 Booty, funds - Bosom
是资金, 白痴 胸部意思是... It's booty, stupid. Bosom means...
胡扯！这是羞辱 What nonsense! That's insulting
每个人都有胸部，但把它藏在兜里 Everyone has a bosom, but it remains pocketed
不肯自愿地交出来 No one offers it so readily
庸俗的家伙 Vulgar fellow
而你却慷慨的献出了你的胸部... You have generously offered your bosom...
把他交给这个不懈的整人者 to this relentless screwer
现在我们看看他是怎么把它增大的 Now see how he makes it grow
这就是你教他们的东西，主任？ Is this what you teach here, Director?
在此庄严时刻，献上一梵文诗篇... On this august occasion, here's a Sanskrit verse...
听这个 - 是说他的强屁 Listen to this - the might of his fart in verse
放一个很响的屁是值得骄傲的 A good loud fart is honorable
“放屁”？放一个，消音器 'Fart'? Go, Silencer
放一个中等的屁是可以接受的 A medium fart is tolerable
放一个轻柔的屁是非常糟糕的 Softer windbreaks are terrible
而一个无声的屁是让人无法忍受的 And the silent ones unbearable
我做什么了？ What did I do?
那些就是那个无脑填鸭的人对你所做的吗？ That's what mindless cramming does to you
也许你就在这4年大学生涯死读书 Cramming may see you through four years of college
但它会在接下来的40年里“整”你 but it will 'screw' you for the next 40 years
他还是不懂 He still doesn't get it
“放一个中等的屁是可以接受的”... 难以置信 'Medium fart is tolerable'... Unbelievable
你真是个诗人，兰彻，你是怎么想出来的？ You're a poet, Rancho. How did you think of this?
太有意思啦，他还不知道发生什么事了 That was fun. He didn't know what hit him
你个猪！我究竟对你有做什么吗？ You swines! What did I ever do to you?
对不起，不是针对你的 Sorry man. Don't take it personally
我认为是 I will
我查图尔 阿莫琳档永远不会忘记这次羞辱 Chatur Ramalingam will never forget this insult
我会一辈子每一分每一秒想到它 I'll think of it every minute, every second of my life
对不起，那是给拉朱的演示--不要死读书 Sorry man. That was a demo for Raju - Don't cram blindly
理解并享受科学的神奇 Understand and enjoy the wonders of Science
我来这里不是为了享受科学的 I'm not here to enjoy Science
那你来这里是为了整科学的？ So You're here to screw Science
放心吧，嘲笑我的方法吧 Go ahead. Laugh at my methods
但总有一天这些方法会给我带来成功 But one day these methods will bring me success
到那天就是我笑你哭 That day I'll laugh and you'll cry
你走错道了又，别追求成功 You're on the wrong track again. Don't chase success
先成为一个好工程师，成功自然会追你而来 Become a good engineer and success will chase you
这些想法现实世界里不管用 These ideals don't work in the real world
你上你的列车，我上我的 You take your train, I'll take mine
从今天起10年后，我们再在此地会面 Ten years from now we'll meet at the same station
同一日子，同一地点，看看我们谁更成功 Same day. Same place. We'll see who's more successful
你 还是我 you... or I
有种吗？来啊，打赌，赌啊 Have the balls? C'mon, bet
这是挑战 It's a challenge
看好了 Watch it!
他在写什么？ What's he writing?
别忘了这个日子 Don't forget this date
我还不习惯收这么贵重的礼物, 苏哈斯 I'm not used to such expensive gifts, Suhas
那就习惯起来, 皮娅 Get used to them, Pia
你就要是我 苏哈斯 坦登的妻子了 You're gonna be Suhas Tandon's wife
账单呢，伙计？ Where's the bill, man?
我很快回来 I'll be back
- 你改的演讲稿？ - 什么？ You changed the speech? - What?
别撒谎 Don't lie
嗯...是啊 Um... Yeah
- 你对我爸有什么不满的啊？ - 没什么 What's your problem with dad? - I have no problem
我正在做的一个发明还用他名字命名呢，看...哦 （盒子：病毒的发明） I'm making an inverter named after him. Look... Oh
你们为什么一直折磨他？ Why're you harassing him?
因为他开了一家工厂，而不是学校 'Cause he runs a factory, not a college
量产混球，就像那位 Churning out asses. Like that one
她把它毁坏了，伙计 She destroyed it, man
你竟敢叫他混球？ How dare you call him an ass?
他就是啊，先学工程学，然后是MBA He is one! First Engineering, then MBA
然后在美国成为银行家 then becomes a banker in the USA
因为能囊入更多的钱？ Because it rakes in more money?
生活对他来说意味着利益的损失 Life for him is just a profit-loss statement
他看到了你这里有利润，所以他和你在一起 He sees profit in you, so he's with you
主任的女儿，大有前途的医生.. 他还真会想象！ Director's daughter, doctor in the making... Good for his image !
他关心的不是你 It's not you he cares for
你以为你是谁 Who do you think you are?
他不关心我是什么意思？ What do you mean he doesn't care for me?
哦，新表，等下 New watch? One moment
你总是要有人演示才明白 You always need a demo
嘿，苏哈斯 Hey Suhas
你去哪里了？ Where were you?
她一直在找手表 She's looking for her watch
啊？你把表弄丢了？ What? You lost the watch
没关系，再买个 Never mind. Get another
那花了40万啊 It cost 400,000
我的就250块，跑得一样准 Mine's just 250/- but keeps the same time
你闭嘴！你怎么能这么粗心, 皮娅？ How could you be so careless, Pia
你这冷漠的态度真厌恶，太无礼了 This callous attitude is disgusting. It's disrespectful
那可是只限量版的表啊 That was a limited edition watch
晚宴的时候就戴着你那块破烂表吧你 Now wear your ancient piece of junk at dinner
瞪什么瞪？ What're you staring at?
眼泪还出来了！你可真成熟啊，皮娅 Here come the tears ! Real mature, Pia
我无法忍受这个 I can't handle this
别哭了，快去找 Stop crying and look for it
你还是给这表找只别的左腕吧...混球 Find another wrist for this watch... Ass
嘿，你太帅了，冲着他叫混球 Hey, you're awesome. Called him an ass to his face
走开 Get lost
这里好吵啊 It's too noisy here
她说“谢谢”我都听成“走开”了 She's saying 'Thank you', I hear 'Get lost'
- 我说的就是“走开” - 用不着那么生气 I said 'Get lost' - Don't get so uptight
实际上你从来就没真的爱过他 Actually, you never really loved him
什么意思？ What do you mean?
当你看到他的时候，有没有感到轻风吹着美妙的旋律？ When you see him, do the winds whisper a melody?
感到你的围巾慢镜头般的飘荡？ Your scarf flies in slow motion?
感到月亮是又圆又大？ The Moon appears gigantic?
那是电影里的，不是生活 That happens in movies, not in life
这就是生活里的--如果你爱上了一个人 Happens in life too - if you love a person
.. 而不是个混球 ... not an ass
喂？啊？ Hello. What?
天啊，好，我就来 Oh God Ok, I'm on my way
你是学医的对吧？帮个忙 You're a medical student, right? Need your help
- 情况紧急，求你了 - 什么？ It's an emergency, please - What?
请跟我来，你们医生不是有宣过什么誓么-- Please come with me. What's that oath you doctors take -
你不拒绝任何一个病人的求助...拉底誓言 You'll never deny a patient help... The Hippocratic Oath
请帮我，真的是急救 Please help me, it's an emergency
我姐的婚礼上你不请自来 破坏我的婚约... You gatecrash my sister's wedding, break off my engagement...
因为你我爸每天吃降压药... my dad is popping BP pills because of you...
而我却在这里，帮你 and here I am, helping you
难以置信 Unbelievable
这个拉底誓言 - 又来折腾我们！ This Hippocratic Oath - It's really done us in !
- 拉朱在哪里, 女士？ - 去叫出租车了 Where's Raju, ma'am? - Gone to get a cab
2小时前就叫了救护车，还没来 Called the ambulance two hours ago
这个国家，披萨30分钟就送到了 In this country, pizza reaches in 30 minutes
可救护车却... but an ambulance...
他得住院，马上 He needs hospitalization. Urgently
嘿，停下 Hey stop
让让，急救 Move, it's an emergency!
让让 让让 Move... move...
医生，要急救 Doctor, emergency!
病人在这里 That's the patient
这个保管好，嘿，拉朱来了 Keep this. Hey, here's Raju
这什么事，你居然用助动车载我爸到医院 What the hell You brought dad on the scooter
难道要我叫邮递员送？ Should I've sent him by courier?
不准拿我爸的职业开玩笑！他在哪里？ No wisecracks on dads profession ! Where is he?
去问医生 Go ask the doctor
来得真及时, 皮娅，再一点点，就救不回来了 Close call, Pia. A little delay, we'd have lost him
你没等救护车，用助动车送他来是对的 Glad you didn't wait for an ambulance and got him on the scooter
有什么问题找我 Call me if there's a problem
兰彻，谢谢你... Rancho Thank you...
会谢你的朋友了，消音器教你礼貌啦？ Thanking your buddies Silencer teaching you manners?
他不是教你--朋友是一个人最大的胸部吗？ Didn't he teach you - A friend is man's greatest bosom?
快回去吧，你们明天还有考试 Go on now. You have an exam tomorrow
考试多的是...可老爸大多就一个 Exams we have many... Dad mostly just one
只要邮局局长还在这里我们就不走 We won't budge from here without the Postmaster
不用怕 Don't worry
兰彻, 原谅我，刚才我太害怕了 Rancho, forgive me. I was scared
没事没事，现在好了 It's ok. Quiet, now
请原谅我 Please forgive me
没事的，冷静下，去看你爸吧 It's ok, calm down. Go see your dad
进去的时候不要哭丧着脸啊 And don't go with that weepy face
谢谢哥们 Thanks buddy
敏捷小车，挽救生命 值多少钱？ Natty scooter. Saved a life. How much does it cost?
撒些薄荷酱上去，它就会告诉你了 Pour some mint sauce on it. It'll tell you
嘿，独立节快乐！ Hey, happy Independence Day
今天不是独立节啊 Today isn't Independence Day
你的独立节啊！现在你可以自由地戴上你妈妈的表了 For you it is! Now you're free to wear your mom's watch
没有混球来说那是一块破烂了 No ass can say it's an ancient piece of junk
嘿 Hey
你怎么知道这块表是我妈的？ How do you know it was mom's watch?
你在你姐姐的婚礼上穿得那么鲜亮 At your sister's wedding, you wore sparkling new clothes
却戴一块旧表 Only the watch was old
这意味着什么？ What could that mean?
说明你那天非常想念你妈妈啊，没错吧？ You really missed your mom that day, didn't you?
是的 Yes
你妈妈一定非常漂亮 Your mom must've been really beautiful
是啊，你又怎么知道？ Yes. How do you know?
看你爸那样 Seen your dad?
“生活就是场赛跑，如果你跑得不够快 'Life is a race. If you don't run fast
你就会打破一个蛋...杜鹃鸟” you'll be a broken egg ... cuckoo bird'
你... You...
轻风吹着美妙的旋律 The winds whisper a melody
天空跟着轻轻地哼唱 The sky hums along
时间也开始放声歌唱... Time itself is singing...
Zoobi do... Zoobi do...
Param pum Param pum
'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi pum paara Zoobi doobi param pum ' 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi pum paara Zoobi doobi param pum '
我那颗傻傻的心在砰砰演奏，轻快跳跃，唱道“Zoobi doobizoobi doobi” My silly heart goes 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi' as it jives and jigs along
'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi pum paara Zoobi doobi param pum ' 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi pum paara Zoobi doobi param pum '
我那颗傻傻的心在砰砰演奏，轻快跳跃，唱道“Zoobi doobizoobi doobi” My silly heart goes 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi' as it jives and jigs along
树叶在枝头上歌唱，蜜蜂和花朵们相拥 Leaves sing on their branches Bees jam with flowers
热情的阳光在花瓣上跳跃，鸟儿在天空里欢快地啼唱 Crazy sunbeams dance off petals As birds yodel in the skies
狂放而又无所忌惮的花儿们，抱着，跳着 Flowers, bold and brazen Snuggle and cootchie-coo
我在电影里见过我们现在的感受 I've seen it happen in movies What's now happening with us
'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi pum paara Zoobi doobi param pum ' 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi pum paara Zoobi doobi param pum '
我那颗傻傻的心在砰砰演奏，轻快跳跃，唱道“Zoobi doobizoobi doobi” My silly heart goes 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi' as it jives and jigs along
'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi pum paara Zoobi doobi param pum ' 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi pum paara Zoobi doobi param pum '
我那颗傻傻的心在砰砰演奏，轻快跳跃，唱道“Zoobi doobizoobi doobi” My silly heart goes 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi' as it jives and jigs along
让我们一起做那独特而一直好用的薄荷酱吧 Let's make the unique and ever useful mint sauce
那万能的薄荷酱啊让虚伪的人们现形 The all-powerful sauce that exposes phony people
无需再为结婚而跟随某人 Your 7th house is clear
踢开一个混球，你会爱上一个人 Shunning an ass, you 'll fall for a human
爱的时机已成熟 Time is ripe for love
新德里的气温仍然稳定 Temperature in New Delhi remains stable
天空晴朗，坠入了爱河却希望它下起雨来 Clear skies. But if in love, expect rain
雨啪啪地下着 风呼呼地刮着 Pitter-patter go the raindrops Whish-whoosh whistles the wind
雨点跳着华尔兹 嗒-嗒-嘀 天空回响着伴奏 轰-轰-轰 Do-da-dee waltzes the rain Boom-boom echoes the sky
被雨水和热情浇透 你扭起腰肢来传情 Drenched in rain and passion You sway your hips on cue
我在电影里见过我们现在的感受 I've seen it happen in movies What's now happening with us
'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi pum paara Zoobi doobi param pum ' 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi pum paara Zoobi doobi param pum '
我那颗傻傻的心在砰砰演奏，轻快跳跃，唱道“Zoobi doobizoobi doobi” My silly heart goes 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi' as it jives and jigs along
'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi pum paara Zoobi doobi param pum ' 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi pum paara Zoobi doobi param pum '
我那颗傻傻的心在砰砰演奏，轻快跳跃，唱道“Zoobi doobizoobi doobi” My silly heart goes 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi' as it jives and jigs along
皎洁的月亮低挂在天空，向大地吟唱美妙的夜曲 The gorgeous low moon Serenades the earth
流星长长划过天空 低声哼唱爱的民谣 A shooting star skips along Crooning a ballad of love
明亮的夜晚啊却如此寂寞，来抱着我吧我的爱人 The night is bright but lonesome Come touch me, my handsome
我在电影里见过我们现在的感受 I've seen it happen in movies What's now happening with us
'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi pum paara Zoobi doobi param pum ' 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi pum paara Zoobi doobi param pum '
我那颗傻傻的心在砰砰演奏，轻快跳跃，唱道“Zoobi doobizoobi doobi” My silly heart goes 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi' as it jives and jigs along
'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi pum paara Zoobi doobi param pum ' 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi pum paara Zoobi doobi param pum '
我那颗傻傻的心在砰砰演奏，轻快跳跃，唱道“Zoobi doobizoobi doobi” My silly heart goes 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi' as it jives and jigs along
“Zoobi doobizoobi doobi”...我那颗傻傻的心唱道 'Zoobi doobi zoobi doobi' ... goes my silly heart
喂，醒醒 Hello. Wake up
- 啊.. 邮局局长死了？ - 啊 Huh... Postmaster's dead? - What
不是，傻瓜 No, stupid
现在8点30了，你们考试9点开始 It's 8.30, your exam is at 9
可我们不能留下他一个人 But we can't leave him alone
我不是在这里吗，考试也就只花3个小时 I'm here. It's a matter of three hours
起我的小车吧，要来不及了 Take my scooter. It's getting late
嘿... Hey...
天啊，多好的一块古董表啊 Gosh, what an ancient watch
去吧 Go
- 对不起我们迟到了 - 之前我们有急事 Sorry, we're late - It was an emergency
那里坐好 Settle down there
先生，他们还在写 Sir, they're still writing
喂，时间到啦 Hello. Time up
等等，再5分钟，我们迟考半小时 Please, five minutes. We started half an hour late
我们真是有急事在身 It was an emergency
他盯着我们看，好像我 们想要他的两个肾一样 He glared at us like we 'd asked for both his kidneys
可我们不管，继续做 But we continued writing
他就继续理收上来的答题纸 He continued arranging the answer sheets
好了，先生 Done, sir
太迟了，我不收 You're late. I can't accept these
先生，求你了，先生 Sir, please, sir
先生，知道我们是谁么？ Sir, do you know who we are?
首相的儿子啊？就算是，我也... Prime Ministers son? Even then...
不收你们的卷子 I will not accept your paper
知道我们的名字和学号吗？ Do you know our names and roll numbers?
不知道... No...
你们叫什么？ Who are you?
他不认识我们--快跑！ He doesn't know - Run !
嘿，你们学号是什么？ Hey, what's your roll number?
哪些是他们的卷子？ Where the hell are their papers?
哦 神啊，请您仁慈 O Lord, have mercy
今天公布成绩，又是 个和神做交易的日子 Today was Results day. Time to make a deal with God
让我电子学过了吧，我就奉上一个椰子 Just save my Electronics. I'll offer a coconut
蛇神大人，保佑我的物理吧， 过了我每天一品脱牛奶献上 Sir Snake, bless my Physics. I promise a pint of milk per day
哦 奶牛女神，帮我过吧...尝尝这些草 O Mother Cow, help me pass... have this grass
我发誓：再不会有透视班里女生的念头... I vow: No X-rated thoughts of girls in my class...
照顾下我的成绩吧 Watch over my results
财神啊，我将每月供上100块钱 God of Wealth, I'll offer 100 /- every month
100块连搞定交警都不够 100 /- won't bribe even a traffic cop
更何况是神 let alone the Almighty
从最底下开始找 Check from the bottom
你是...最后一名 You are... last
那你呢？ And you?
倒数 第二 Second last
兰彻呢? Rancho?
没有他 Not there
我的心沉了 My heart sank
不是因为我们的排名，而 是因为我们的好友没及格 Not 'cause our ranks tanked, but 'cause our friend flunked
肯定哪里弄错了 这不可能，不公平 There's a mistake. It's not possible. It's injustice
消音器在嚎什么？ What's Silencer howling about?
他只拿了第二名 He got the second rank
第一是谁？ Who's first?
兰彻 Rancho
兰彻? Rancho?
让开 Move aside
我们学到了人类行为学的一课: We learned a lesson in Human Behavior:
你朋友不及格，你感觉很糟； 你朋友考第一，你感觉更糟 Your friend fails, you feel bad. Your friend tops, you feel worse
我们两个感觉很糟， 还有两个感觉更糟 We were sad. Two others were sadder
昂史奥格斯 忏查特， 第一排，坐主任右边 Ranchhoddas Chanchad. Front row. Right of the Director
乌代辛哈，第二排第三座 Uday Sinha. Second row. Third seat
阿洛克米塔尔，第二排第五座 Alok Mittal. Second row. Fifth seat
萨赫利饶 第三排... Sahili Rao. Third row...
先生，为什么位置要按名次排？ Sir, why this seating according to rank?
有什么不对吗？ Any problem with that?
有啊，这个排名制度就像种姓制度 Yes, this grading system is like a caste system
A等: 主人 C等: 奴隶 A-graders: Masters C-graders: Slaves
- 这样太不友好了，先生 - 你有什么更好的方法？ It's not nice, sir - You have a better idea?
有啊，成绩不要用座次表现出来 Yes. Results should not be displayed at all
干嘛非要公布人们的缺点呢？ Why publicise someone's flaws?
如果你缺铁了，医生是给你开处方呢... If your iron count is low, will the doctor prescribe tonic...
还是把你体检报告广播到电视上？ or air your report on TV
很简单，先生 You see, sir?
简单说来，你所要表达的是 So basically, what you are saying is
我应该亲自跑去每一个学生的房间 I should personally go to each student's room
然后贴着耳朵告诉他... and whisper in his ears...
“你考了第一”，“你是第二名” 'You have come first' 'You're second'
“哦，对不起，你没及格” 'Oh, I'm so sorry, you have failed'
不，先生，我是说成绩造成了隔阂 No sir, I mean grades create a divide
我第一名，所以我坐你旁边 I've topped, so I'm next to you
我伙伴垫底，他们就呆角落 My pals came last, they're in the back corner
至少他们还有角落呆 At least they're in the corner
他们要再和你呆一起，就合影的机会都没了 More time with you, and they'll be out of the photo
他们两个不可能毕业，也不可能有工作 They will neither pass, nor get a job
他们会有工作的，总会有些公司... They'll get jobs, sir. There must be some firm that...
更喜欢人类，而不是机器 prefers humans to machines
他们会有工作，我保证 They'll get jobs. I guarantee
你保证？ You guarantee it
打赌，先生？ Bet, sir?
- 戈文 - 哎，什么事先生？ Govind - Yes, sir?
只要那两个中有一个在校园招聘上得到了工作... Even if one of them gets a job in campus interviews...
就把我胡子剃掉 shave off my moustache
先生！ Sir !
- 高兴啦？ - 笑一个 Happy? - Smile, please
高兴，先生 Happy, sir
你个混蛋，按喇叭来掩盖放屁 Jackass Honking to hide your tooting
化粪池 你有吃那些药丸啦？ Septic tank Popping pills again?
不是我干的吧.. 拉朱？ I didn't do it... Raju?
这臭味还真熟悉 This is a familiar stink
全球变暖就是你造成的 He's the sole cause for global warming
钱包掏给我 - 我去买裤子 Toss me your wallet - I'll buy pants
- 穿查图尔的那套西服就行了 - 别碰我西服 Take Chatur's suit instead - Don't touch my suit
只剩一条内裤兰彻也认得你 Rancho'll recognize you even in underwear
- 这是哪里？ - 我要看得懂，就不用卖花生了 Where's this? - If I could read, would I sell peanuts?
- 他不识字 - 可人家会说啊 He can't read - But he can speak
等下，你知道一个叫昂史奥格斯忏查特的吗？ Wait. Do you know a Ranchhoddas Chanchad?
知道，他住那里 Yes, he lives there
他曾像风一样自由 Free as the wind was he
他曾像翱翔的风筝 Like a soaring kite was he
他去了哪里... Where did he go...
我们去找他吧 let's find him
- 查图尔, 你的药丸 - 谢谢，你哪里找到的？ Chatur, your pills - Thanks. Where were they?
- 在口袋里啊 - 嘿，你竟敢，那是我的裤子！ In the pocket - Hey, my pants!
- 卡尔-马克思说，要共享一切资源 - 你闭嘴，脱下来 Karl Marx says to share all resources
嘿，你这样会让人误解的 Hey, you'll give people ideas
现在还我 I want it now
怎么了？ What happened?
兰彻的父亲 Rancho's father
对不起，昂史奥格斯在哪里？ Excuse me, where is Ranchhoddas?
- 他在那里 - 谢谢 There he is - Thank you
- 兰彻... - 嗯? Rancho... - Yes?
对不起，我们找昂史奥格斯 Sorry. We're looking for Ranchhoddas
我就是 昂史奥格斯 I am Ranchhoddas
我是找“昂史奥格斯 刹玛德斯 忏查特” No, I mean... 'Ranchhoddas Shamaldas Chanchad'
昂史奥格斯 刹玛德斯 忏查特，就是我 Ranchhoddas Shamaldas Chanchad. That's me
昂史奥格斯, 保重，孩子 Ranchhoddas, take care, son
“昂史奥格斯 忏查特” 'Ranchhoddas Chanchad'
拉朱 Raju
我没穿裤子从德里兜到西姆拉， 可以载入吉尼斯世界纪录了 I'll be in the Guinness Book for driving Delhi-Shimla in underwear
还找错人了，这个也可以载入 That too, for the wrong guy
名字一样，学位一样，照片一样，人却不一样 Same name, same degree, same photo, but a different guy
怎么回事呢？ What's going on?
消音器是怎么弄到兰彻地址的？ How did Silencer get Rancho's address?
好见解！ Good point!
嘿 查图尔，过来 Hey Chatur, come here
你竟敢打开这个，我可是从旧金山带来的 How dare you open this? I got this from San Francisco
手工饼干啊 Handmade biscuits
特地送给法撒克 旺度先生的 Specially for Mr. Phunsukh Wangdu
法撒克 邦度？他是谁？ Phunsukh Bangdu? Who's that?
不是邦度.是旺度，“W” 法撒克 旺度 Not Bangdu. Wangdu. 'W'. Phunsukh Wangdu
你知道他是谁吗？他是一位大科学家 Do you know who that is? He's a great scientist
400项专利，全世界都抢着要他 400 patents. The world wants him
我花了一年才得到这个会面 Took me a year to get an appointment
一旦他和我公司签了这笔交易，我就发财啦！ Once he signs the deal with my company, I'll be huge !
别管旺度了，你是怎么拿到兰彻地址的？ Forget Wangdu. How'd you get Rancho's address?
你们该好好谢谢法撒克 旺度 You should be thanking Phunsukh Wangdu
他让我找到这个地方，看这个 He led me to Rancho, See this
我秘书曾来这里安排我和旺度的会面 My secretary was here to fix an appointment with Wangdu
会面没成，可我却找到了兰彻 She didn't get the appointment. But I found Rancho
我查了下西姆拉的姓名地址目录，找到了兰彻 I checked the Shimla directory and found Rancho's name
那他那张脸怎么了？ What happened to his face?
做整容手术 来欢迎你的来访？ Plastic surgery in honor of your visit?
只有一个人知道答案 Only one man has the answer
对不起，爸爸，我没能完成你最后的心愿 Sorry Papa, I couldn't fulfill your last wish
你一直叫我带你去朝圣 You kept asking me to take you on pilgrimage
可我却等着那个公路投标 But I waited for the highway tender
投标开始了，而你却闭眼了 There the tender opened, here you closed your eyes
我对不起你，爸，我没能做个好儿子 I am so sorry, Papa. I could not be a good son...
错 Wrong
你是工程师，学位证还挂在墙上 You're an engineer. Your degree's on the wall !
你曾经是个好儿子 You were a very good son
你们竟敢私闯，我要逮捕你们 How dare you barge in? I'll have you arrested
不对，你才会被捕，我们都调查过了 No, you'll be arrested. We've made enquiries
你用学位来获得合同 You use the degree to clinch contracts
那是我们朋友的学位，你是怎么拿去的？ It's our friend's degree. How did you get it?
这是一个150英亩的庄园 This is a 150 acre estate
我开枪杀了你们，埋了，没有任何人会知道 If I shoot and bury you, no one would even notice
懂不懂？ Get the point?
现在快滚 Now get lost
我还要把爸爸的骨灰洒向圣河，也可顺便洒你们的骨灰 I'm taking Papa's ashes to the sacred river. Can take yours too
抓他老爸！ Grab Papa !
这里 Here, here
我们把他爸放开吧 Let go of Papa
告诉我们真相，不让就把你爸冲了 Tell the truth or Papa is flushed
- 给我交出来 - 那老爸要去圣沟啦 Hand over Papa - Papa goes to the sacred sewer
- 把他爸移出马桶 - 你要开枪，我就冲 Get Papa out of the potty - You pull trigger, I pull flush.
我数三下 I'll count to three
想打我们，哈？拉朱把灰撒了 Wanna shoot us? Raju, scatter the ashes
一 One
你要放倒我们，你爸就倒阴沟了 Take us down, and Papa's down the drain
二 Two
你就等着去捞吧 Then grope for him in the gutter
干嘛, 拉朱？ What is it, Raju?
拿错瓮了我们，这个是空的 We've got the wrong urn. It's empty
空的？ Empty?
- 空 - 我们要把它全空出来 Empty - we'll empty it out
别，别 No, no
我们要空了 We'll empty it out
不要...投降！ No... hands up !
你是谁？ Who are you?
我是兰彻 I am Rancho
我向我爸发誓，是真话 I swear on Papa, it's true
兰彻是我，你们说的是驰赫特 I am Rancho That was Chhote.
驰赫特? Chhote?
他是我们园丁的儿子，驰赫特 He was our gardener's son, Chhote
他爸妈死后就和我们一起 He stayed on with us after he was orphaned
在我们家附近做零工，跑跑腿 Did odd jobs around the house, ran errands
他很有学习的热情 He had a passion for learning
老是穿我的校服溜到学校 He'd wear my old uniform and slip into school
去听他喜欢的课，这正合我想要的 And attend any class he liked. It suited me
我让他帮我做功课，代我考试 I made him do my homework, take my exams
一直都没发生什么事，直到有一天... It was going well, till one day...
我们老师看到一个六年级学生在做十年级的数学 Our teacher saw a sixth grader doing tenth grade math
孩子，你念几年级啊？ Which grade are you in, son?
你叫什么？ What's your name?
我们就被发现了 We got caught
我爸是个很有权势的人，所以... Papa was a powerful man, so...
老师在通报校长前告知了我爸 our teacher alerted him before going to the Principal
这事是你引起的，也要你来完成 You started it, you will finish it
人们都假装尊敬我 People pretend to show me respect
可在我背后... But behind my back...
嘲弄我是文盲 mock me as an illiterate
我不想我儿子也和我一样 I won't let that happen to my son
这孩子想要学习，而我要的只是一个学位 This boy wants to study. I want just a degree
让这游戏继续下去吧 Let the game go on
把这孩子培养成工程师 Make this kid an engineer
而我就可以有张写着我儿子名字的学位证挂那面墙上 and I'll have a degree in my son's name on that wall
我去伦敦呆了四年，他则代我念完大学 I went to London for four years, he went to college as me
他保证过一旦完成学业就切断任何联系 He'd promised to cut contact with all after getting the degree
但他总是说，“有两个白痴会来找我的”' But he always said, 'Two idiots will come looking for me'
他真的很想念你们两个 He really misses you both
我给你们他的地址，去找他吧 I'll give you his address, go to him
但请保守我的秘密 But please keep my secret
什么秘密啊？ What secret?
你拿错瓮了，先生，你爸在这里 You got the wrong urn, sir. Papa is in here
发生什么事了？拿枪的那个是谁？ What the hell's going on? Who was that gun guy?
剧情太复杂了，而且没有字幕，不适合你 Complicated story. Without subtitles. Not for you
- 不要知道了，不要知道了 - 我们现在去哪里？ Ignore it - Where're we going?
拉达克 Ladakh
拉达克！为什么？ Ladakh ! Why?
去见兰彻 To meet Rancho
他去拉达克干嘛？ What's he doing in Ladakh?
不知道，我们拿到的是一所学校的地址 No clue. We have the address of a school
学校教师！ School teacher!
我是岩礁公司的副主席，而他呢... I'm Vice President of Rockledge Corporation, and he...
A是苹果，B是球... A for Apple, B for Ball...
D是蠢驴 D for Donkey
下星期我就要和法撒克 旺度签千万美金的合同 Next week I sign a huge deal with Phunsukh Wangdu
而他.. A是苹果，B是球... And he... A for Apple, B for Ball...
到今天，我对后面那白痴的尊敬可都用完了 Today my respect for that idiot shot up
我们多数人上大学就是为了个学位 Most of us went to college just for a degree
没有文凭就意味着没好工作，没有漂亮的老婆... No degree meant no plum job, no pretty wife...
没有信用卡，没有社会地位 no credit card, no social status
可这些他都不在乎 None of this mattered to him
他上大学是为了演习的乐趣 He was in college for the joy of learning
他从来不在乎自己是第一还是最后 He never cared if he was first or last
谁是第一个登上月球的？ Who was the first man on the Moon?
尼尔 阿姆斯特朗, 先生 Neil Armstrong, sir
当然是尼尔 阿姆斯特朗，我们都知道 Obviously, it is Neil Armstrong. We all know it
那谁是第二个？ Who was the second?
不用浪费时间了，这个不重要 Don't waste your time. It's not important
没人会记住那个第二名 Nobody remembers the man who ever came second
很快，26家公司要来这里招聘了 Soon, 26 companies will be here with job offers
甚至在期末考前你就可以拿到工作 You'll have a job even before your final exam
这是你们的最后一次机会，我的朋友们 This is your last lap, my friends
猛踩油门 全速行驶 Put the pedal to the metal. Step on the gas
走向社会 开创历史 Go out there and make history!
有问题吗？ Any questions?
嗯？ Yes?
先生，如果有人应聘成功... Sir, suppose a student gets a job...
可是期末考试还差一点点就过了， 他还可以签那份工作吗？ but narrowly fails the final exam, will he still have the job?
这个问题好 Very good question
还有谁有同样的疑问？ Anyone else with the same question?
不出所料 As expected
请站到台上来，大家鼓掌欢迎 Please come on stage. Give them a big hand
这四年里 For the last four years
他们两个是我学习最稳定的学生 they've been our most consistent students
每次考试成绩一直保持垫底 Consistently last in every exam
来，我的天才，上来 Come my geniuses, come
他们的脑子可以卖一个好价钱啊 Their brains will fetch a handsome price
完全没用过 崭新的 'Cause they're completely unused
而那个问题的答案呢 And to answer their question -
考试结果不会影响他们的应聘情况 The exam won't affect their jobs
因为就没有公司会要他们 我肯定 Because no company will hire them anyway!
他们两个是如此独一无二，他们的名字将用金字书写 They're so unique, their names will be writ in gold -
“法汉艾瑞特” 和 “普瑞 拉朱利扎申” (兰彻黑板上杜撰的那两个词) 'Farhanitrate' and 'Prerajulization'
大家给他们热烈鼓掌 Give them a big hand, please, everybody
他羞辱我们 He screwed us
当着大家的面 In front of everyone
神啊，我将改不吃肉，点1000根熏香棒 God, I'll give up meat, light a 1000 incense sticks
就帮我一个忙吧 Do me just one favor -
删除病毒！ Delete Virus!
把他烧到地狱里去 Burn him in hell
滚油炸病毒块 Fry Virus-nuggets in bubbling oil
你不是说神是毁约杀手么？ You think God is a contract killer?
你闭嘴 You shut up
你每年合影都坐最中间 You're in the center of the photo every year
我们就塞在角落 We're rotting in the corner
今年这次我们两个连合影都不能上了 This year we may fall out of the photo altogether
- 知道为什么我第一么？ - 为什么？ Know why I come first? - Why?
因为我喜欢机器 Because I love machines
工程就是我的激情 Engineering is my passion
知道你的激情是什么吗？ Know your passion?
- 那包是我的 - 安静 That's my bag - Be quiet
你找什么？ What're you up to?
这个 就是你的激情 This... is your passion
把这封信寄了 Go post this letter
什么信？ What letter?
5年前他就写了这封信， 给他最喜欢的野生动物摄影师 5 years ago he wrote this for his favorite wildlife photographer
- 安德烈... - 伊斯特凡 Andre... - Istvan
想去匈牙利和他学摄影 He wanted to train with him in Hungary
却怕他老爸，一直没寄出去 But in fear of his dad, the Fuhrer, never posted it
别干工程了，去娶摄影吧 Quit Engineering, marry Photography
发挥你的天赋去 Follow your talent
要是迈克尔 杰克逊他爸强迫他去做拳击手... If Michael Jackson's dad forced him to be a boxer...
穆罕默德 阿里他爸要他去做歌手... and Mohammad Ali's dad pushed him to be a singer...
想想是什么灾难 imagine the disaster
懂了不？ Do you get it?
傻瓜一个，深爱着摄影，却要娶机器 Idiot Loves Photography, but is marrying machines
神圣的领袖 昂史奥格斯啊 Your Holiness Guru Ranchhoddas
工程既是我的老婆又是我的情人 Engineering is my wife and mistress both
- 可我还是考不好，为什么？ - 解释啊 But I still fail. Why? - Explain
因为你太懦弱，害怕将来 'Cause you're a coward, scared of the future
看看这些 - 戒指比手指还多 Look at this - more holy rings than fingers
一个戒指就是一个恐惧 考试，姐姐的嫁妆，工作 One ring per fear - exam, sis's dowry, job
这么怕明天，今天怎么活？ With such fear of tomorrow, how'll you live today?
你怎么去专心学习？ How'll you focus on studies?
两个奇怪的哥们，一个活在恐惧里， 一个活在伪装中 Strange buddies One lives in fear, the other in pretense
你两个都是，同时活在恐惧和伪装里 You live in both - fear and pretense
你不敢告诉皮娅 你爱她， 所以又假装不爱她 You're scared to tell Pia you love her... so you pretend you don't
乱说 What rubbish !
给意见容易 接受难 Easy to offer free advice, tough to follow it
有胆不？去向皮娅表白 Have the guts? Go confess to Pia.
- 这是两码事！ - 关系很深，殿下 There's no connection ! - Deep connection, Your Holiness
听好，如果你向皮娅表白 Listen, if you confess to Pia
我就跟我爸说－不学工程了，我要做摄影 I'll tell Dad - No Engineering, I'm marrying Photography
而我 就在应聘前把戒指都扔了 And I'll dump my rings before the job interview
来不？ Deal?
有胆么？ Have the guts?
殿下沉默了 His Holiness is speechless
出发 Let's go
- 跟我来 - 去哪里？ Follow me - Where?
出发 Let's go
嘿，病毒，我可是杀毒软件 Hey Virus I'm anti-Virus
希望这里没狗 Hope no dog here
胆小鬼，走啊 Cowards ! Let's go
有危险 我就发病毒警报 If any danger, I'll give the Virus alert
小心 - 内有病毒 Beware - Virus inside
要配乐吗？ Need background score?
- 皮娅 - 谁？ Pia - Who's it?
别喊，是我，兰彻 Don't yell ! It's me, Rancho
只要你听一会儿，我就走 Just listen for a moment, then I'm gone
默不作声... Say not a word...
- 皮娅... - 嗯？ Pia... - Yes?
在助动车上和你在一起的22分钟 Those 22 minutes with you on the scooter
是我一生中最灿烂的22分钟 were the most enchanting 22 minutes of my life
我愿和你一辈子坐在那小车上 I could spend an eternity with you on the scooter
哇 Wow
.. 时间静止了 ... and time stands still
每天晚上你都开进我的梦里，穿得像位新娘 Every night you ride into my dreams on your scooter, dressed as a bride
你掀起的是头盔，而不是面纱 Instead of a veil, you lift your helmet
走近我，要吻我 and come close to kiss me
可却没吻成 But that kiss doesn't happen
为什么？ Why?
因为鼻子碰上了，我就撞醒了 Because the noses collide, and I wake up
接吻鼻子不会碰上的，傻瓜！ The noses never collide, stupid !
对不起，我以为你是皮娅 I'm sorry, I thought you were Pia
真希望我是 I wish I was
姐，干嘛不让他说完？ Sis, why did you interrupt?
憋四年了他才说出来啊 It took him four years to say this
皮娅, 亲亲他，让他知道鼻子不会碰上的 Pia, kiss him. Show that noses don't collide
我批准了，亲他...他太可爱了！ You have my permission, kiss him... He's so cute!
- 她是谁？ - 我姐姐 Who's this? - My sister
你是谁？ Who're you?
你刚才说话的时候，这小子第一次踢我了 When you were talking, he kicked. First time
小子？你怎么知道是男是女？ He? How do you know it's a 'he' or 'she'?
爸爸问过占星家是工程师还是医生了 Papa asked the astrologer If we'd get an engineer or a doctor
难道说... Meaning?
男人做工程师，女人当医生啊 Boy becomes an engineer, girl a doctor
好宝宝，还是呆在里面吧，外面可是马戏团 Champ, better stay inside. Out here's a circus
你爷爷就是训兽师，他会啪啪挥着鞭子 - Your grandpa is the ringmaster. He'll crack his whip -
“快跑！生活就是场赛跑，要做工程师” 'Run ! Life is a race. Be an engineer'
可是你要做自己想要的啊，如果爷爷威胁你... But you follow your heart. If grandpa scares you...
就把手放在心前说 “Aal izz Well” put your hand on your heart and say, 'All is well'
他踢了 He kicked
再说一次 Say it again
Aal izz Well All is well
又踢了 Kicked again
- 再来 - Aal izz Well Once more - All is well
Aal izz Well All is well
谁啊？ Who is it?
快走 Go
你给我爸写仇恨信，我给你封尿尿信 You sent hate-mail to Dad, here's pee-mail for you
享受这尿尿信吧，读信快乐哈 Enjoy the pee-mail, happy reading
- 谁啊？ - 你未来女婿 Who is it? - Your future son-in-law
还有婚礼团 And the wedding party
拉斯托吉？ Rastogi
保安，那边 Security, that way
你们都学过了单摆 So you all have already learned about the simple pendulum
现在我们进一步学习复摆 Now let's get down to the advanced study about compound pendulum
这是一不规则物体，绕其轴振荡 It's an irregular object oscillating about its own axis
演示给你们看 Let me demonstrate to you
- 这是什么？ - 铅笔 What's this? - Pencil
- 里面是什么？ - 铅芯 What's inside? - Lead
好，铅芯是铅笔的轴 Good. Lead is the axis to this pencil
就是你人也可以是一个复摆，如果你振荡在... Even you can be a compound pendulum, if you oscillate about...
- 拉朱拉斯托吉在哪里？ - 来啦，先生 Where is Raju Rastogi? - Present, sir
嗨，大家都在啊 Hi. Everybody is here
早上好，先生 Good morning, sir
昨晚你在哪里？ Where were you last night?
- 整晚学习，先生 - 学习？ Studying all night, sir - Studying?
真的？ Really?
两晚没睡了，所以他看起来衣冠不整 Hasn't slept two nights, that's why he looks scruffy
没睡？ Not slept?
你学的什么？ What did you study?
异步电动机，整章 Induction motor, sir. The whole chapter
整章？ Whole chapter?
这样的话，拉朱拉斯托吉先生 In that case, Mr. Ra ju Rastogi...
听到，先生！ Yessir!
你可以告诉大家异步电动机是怎么起动的吗？ Can you tell us how an induction motor starts?
停下！ Stop it
先生，是酒 Sir, rum
拉斯托吉先生 Mr. Rastogi
来我办公室喝喝茶吧 Let's have a cup of tea in my office
先生？ Sir?
关好门 Close the door
能打字吗？ Can you type?
能，先生 Yes, sir
帮我打封信可以吗？ Will you type a letter for me?
当然，先生 Definitely, sir
来，坐吧 Come, sit
先生，对不起... Sir, I'm sorry sir...
请打 Please type
尊敬的先生... Dear Sir...
我很痛苦却不得不通知您... It is my painful duty to inform you...
您儿子要被勒令... that your son is rusticated...
不，对不起，删了这句，返回去 No, sorry, delete that. Go back
您儿子，拉朱拉斯托吉... Your son, Mr. Raju Rastogi...
从帝国理工学院勒令退学 is rusticated from the Imperial College of Engineering
快点，打啊 Come on, type
这会杀了我爸的，先生 It'll kill my dad, sir
- 请打出来 - 先生，求您了 Please type - Sir, please sir
这是我的最终决定，不可撤消 My decision is final and irrevocable
他就是为了看到我成为一名工程师才活到现在 He lives just to see me become an engineer
你在我门前撒尿前就该想到这点 Should've thought of that before peeing on my door
先生，给我一个机会吧，求求您 Sir, give me one chance... please
那好，把信上你名字删掉 Ok, remove your name from the letter...
改成兰彻 and put in Rancho's
我知道昨晚他和你在一起 I know he was with you last night
你给我作证，我就放过你 Be my witness and I'll spare you
你有7又1/2分钟来考虑 You have 7 1/2 minutes to think
我们不会放弃你 We won't let go of you
我们还没完.. 绝不 We're not done yet... no way
天堂要召唤你 The heavens may beckon you
但我们将拿起武器对抗神灵 But we'll take up arms against God
这是一场我们不打算输掉的战争 And it's not a fight we intend to lose
你可以拼命地逃 You may try your best to escape
用你的神力逃跑 Try with all your might
但你别想我们会放过你 But there is no way we are letting go of you
我们不会放弃你 We won't let go of you
我们还没完.. 绝不 We're not done yet... no way
兰彻, 看着监视器 Rancho, watch that monitor
拉朱 Raju
他身体因为撞击而瘫痪，但他神志清醒 His body is paralyzed with shock, but his mind is alert
他听得到，看得到我们，所以在他面前请不要哭 He can see and hear us. Please don't cry in front of him
和他正常地交谈，鼓励他，开开玩笑 Speak to him normally, motivate him, joke around
好消息，拉朱，你爸康复了 Good news, Raju. Your dad's recovered
新药起作用了 The new medicine worked
这是你们家的传统吗， Is this your family tradition -
一个人站起来了，另一个就要躺下？ As one male gets up, the other conks out?
快点，醒醒 Come, wake up
你爸要骑皮娅的小车 Your dad wants Pia's scooter
我让给他骑吗？希望他不会把车撞扁了 Should I give it to him? Hope he won't dent it
拉朱, 法汉在摄像头前呢，他人在宾馆里 Raju, Farhan is live on webcam. From the hostel
看，病毒撤消了对的退学令 Look, Virus has canceled your suspension order
问题解决了，可以醒来了 Problem solved... Wake up now
什么事都好了，听到了吗？ Everything's resolved You hear that?
该起床了，好兄弟 Rise and shine, buddy
在这只有几步的旅途里 In this journey of few strides
在这个叫生活的中途中 On the path called life
不要放弃...庆祝走出的每一步 Don't quit... Just celebrate the ride
请听听这些爱你的人们 Listen please to those who love you
每个黑夜都被旭日打破 Every dark night is followed by sunrise
别把爱你的人关在外面 Don't shut out those who love you
我们不会放弃你 We won't let go of you
我们还没完.. 绝不 We're not done yet... no way
我们不会放弃你 We won't let go of you
我们还没完.. 绝不 We're not done yet... no way
- 看，妈妈块买了件新纱丽 - 崭新的 Look, mom bought a new saree - Brand new
花了2000块啊 It cost 2000 /-
快醒醒 Wake up now
她买了不止一件，共买了十件 She bought not one, but ten sarees
看！ Look!
嘿，拉朱 Hey Raju
快告诉我，我看起来怎样？ C'mon tell me... How do I look?
记着妈妈要写给你的话... Remember the letters mom would write...
时刻祝福伴你一生 Always blessed you with eternal life
不要骗她了，你不会死的 Don't die on her... you can 't die
看着我们吧，别移开视线 Look at us now, don't turn away
快微笑一下，以示你在乎 Smile once to show you care
醒醒，不要折磨我们了 Wake up, don't torment us anymore
听说你姐的事了吗？ Did you hear about your sis?
她要结婚了 She's getting married
不用出嫁妆 Without any dowry
新郎什么都不要 The bridegroom wants nothing at all
就只要凯茉 He just wants Kammo
- 知道新郎是谁吗？ - 知道吗？ You know who the bridegroom is? - Yeah
猜猜看 Guess
- 你很熟悉的一个人 - 对的 You know him very well - Yes
- 他热爱动物 - 哈...？ He loves animals - Huh...?
他要成为一名野生动物摄影师 He's going to be a wildlife photographer
安静.. 嘘... Quiet... Shhhh...
猜到了吧？就是我们的法汉啊 Didn't get it? It's our Farhan
法汉才不要什么嫁妆 Farhan will never take any dowry
法汉要娶你的姐姐 Farhan will marry your sister
免费娶，免费娶 For free Free! Free
拉朱 Raju
其实免费的一公斤秋葵或一斤奶酪就可以唤醒他了 One kilo okra, 500 grams cheese for 'free' would've woken him
为什么要牺牲我！ Why sacrifice me... !
你真棒，哥们 Well done, buddy
那就这么定了－法汉将娶你姐姐 So it's all fixed - Farhan will marry your sister
兰彻 Rancho
拉斯卡尔斯.. 不要胡扯了可以不？ Rascals... Stop fibbing
逃过一劫 Lucky escape
我们不会放弃你 We won't let go of you
我们还没完.. 绝不 We're not done yet... no way
我们不会放弃你 We won't let go of you
我们还没完.. 绝不 We're not done yet... no way
我们不会放弃你 We won 't let go of you
“秋葵12块一公斤” 'Okra Rs.12 / kilo'
你叫了出租车吧？ You called for a taxi?
- 是啊 - 车在等着 I did - It's waiting
谢谢 怎么了？ Thank you. Why?
我去面试 I'm going to the job interview
你要和我一起去啊？ You coming with me?
不啊，我去面试，你呢回家去 No. I'm going for the interview. You're going home
干嘛我要回家 Why would I go home?
记得我们向这个混蛋保证过什么吗？ Remember, we promised this rascal
把领结给我 Give me your tie
为什么？ Why?
你看过这个之后，我怀疑你还会不会去面试 I doubt you'll go for the interview after reading this
那是什么？ What's that?
- 信 - 写给你的，匈牙利寄来的 A letter - For you, from Hungary
一个叫安德烈 伊什特万的摄影师 Some photographer called Andre Istvan
你把我的信给寄出去了！ You posted my letter !
他很喜欢你的电照片 He loved your pictures
这家伙需要你协助他... The guy wants you to assist him...
去一年巴西热带雨林 in the Brazilian rain forest, for a year
还付你工资 Will pay you, too
我爸不会同意的 Dad will never agree
和他说说...真心地和他说 Go speak to him... from your heart
就这一次, 放下对他的恐惧... For once, dump your fears...
要不然，某天你要临终了，你会后悔的 or someday, on your deathbed, you'll regret it
你要记着，信在手上，出租车就在门外 You'll remember that the letter was in your hand, taxi at the gate...
只需一点点勇气，你就可以把你的生活转个身 With just a little courage, you could've turned your life around
你觉得他会喜欢吗？ Do you think he'll like it?
干嘛买这么贵的礼物？ Why such an expensive gift?
今天我们儿子要拿到第一份工作了 Our son's getting his first job today
这么自豪的时刻可别那么吝啬 Don't be stingy at such a proud moment
法汉？ Farhan?
你没去面试么今天？ Don't you have the job interview today?
我没去 I didn't go
爸，我不想做工程师 I don't want to be an engineer, Dad
怎么了？你出事故了？ What happened? You had an accident?
看到那栋楼么？我在那里三楼跳下来 See that building? I jumped from its third floor
为什么？ Why?
因为我被勒令退学 Because I was rusticated from college
为什么？ Why?
喝醉了，在主任家门口小便 Drunk, I urinated on the Director's door
那个骗子兰彻把你弄糊涂了！ That scoundrel Rancho is messing with your mind !
我不喜欢工程，会成为很烂的工程师 I don't enjoy Engineering. I'd make a terrible engineer
兰彻只是简单地想 - 把你的热情所在作为职业 Rancho has a simple belief - Make your passion your profession
那时工作就会变成娱乐 Then work will become play
你在丛林里能挣到钱吗？ What'll you earn in that jungle?
一点点报酬，但我可以学到很多 A small stipend, but I'll learn a lot
五年以后... Five years from now...
当你看到你朋友都买车买房了就会恨你自己了 when you see your friends buying cars and homes, you'll curse yourself
作一个工程师活着只会给我带来绝望， 那时我会恨你的 Life as an engineer will bring only frustration. Then I'll curse you
我情愿恨我自己，爸 I'd rather curse myself, Dad
全世界都会笑话你！ The world will laugh !
标榜你为失败者，因为你最后一年放弃了 Label you a loser, for quitting in the final year
卡普尔先生认为你在帝国理工 很有前途，他将会怎么想？ Mr. Kapoor feels you're fortunate to be at ICE. What'll he think?
给我买空调的可不是卡普尔先生 Mr. Kapoor didn't provide me with an air-conditioner
让我睡得很香而不是睡得不舒服的， 不是卡普尔先生 It wasn't Mr. Kapoor who slept in discomfort while I slept well
让我骑在肩上逛动物园不是他 He didn't take me around the zoo on his shoulders
为我这么做的人可都是你啊，爸 You did all that, Dad
你的感受对我很重要， 卡普尔先生对我没任何影响 How you feel, matters to me. Mr. Kapoor makes no difference
我都不知道他姓什么 I don't even know his first name
你以为自己是情景剧里的英雄？ You think you're the hero of a melodrama?
好了, 别说了.. 他现在很乱 Enough, please... he's upset
如果他像拉朱一样做傻事了，那可怎么办... God forbid, if he did something crazy like Raju...
那我们不说了 Then the discussion is over
我一个字都不能说，不然他就会跳楼 Don't say a word or His Lordship will jump off the roof
不会的，爸，我不会去自杀，我保证 No, Dad. I'll never attempt suicide. I promise
你讨厌的兰彻把这照片放到我钱包里 The Rancho you detest put this picture in my wallet
跟我说，如果有任何自杀的念头 Told me to see it if a suicidal thought crossed my mind
就想想你们两看到我尸体时 and imagine what'd happen to your smiles
你们的微笑又会变成什么 when you see my dead body
我要说服你，爸 I want to convince you, Dad
但不是用自杀来威胁来说服 but not with a suicide threat
爸，我做了摄影师会怎么样呢？ Dad, what'll happen if I become a photographer?
拿的钱少 I'll earn less
住小点的房子，开小点的车 I'll have a smaller house, a smaller car
但是我快乐 But I'll be happy
我会非常快乐 I will be really happy
无论我对您做了什么 都是因为我真的爱您 Whatever I do for you will be out of genuine love
以前我什么都听您的 I've always listened to you
就这一次，就让我听着我的心吧 For once, let me listen to my heart
求您了 爸 Please... Dad
爸... Dad...
请别走... Please don't go away...
把这个还回去 Return this
儿子，专业的相机要多少钱？ Son, what's the cost of a professional camera?
这个笔记本的钱够换一台吧？ Can the laptop be exchanged for it?
不够的话，你尽管问我要 If you need more money, just ask
去过你的生活吧，儿子 Go live your life, my son
你成绩一直都很差，原因是什么？ Your grades are consistently poor. Reason?
恐惧 Fear
我从小就是个好学生 I was a good student since childhood
父母希望我能结束他们的贫穷 Parents hoped I'd end their poverty
那让我感到惧怕 That scared me
在这里，我又看到疯狂的竞赛， 如果你不是第一就什么都不是 Here I saw the mad race. You don't count if you're not first
我的恐惧就一直在增长 My fear grew
恐惧对成绩真的不好，先生 Fear is not good for grades, sir
我就找了更多的神符和圣戒 I slipped on more charms and rings
祈祷神的厚爱，不，是乞讨 Prayed to God for favors. No... begged for favors
16根摔断的肋骨 让我这两个月里思考和反思 1 6 broken bones gave me two months to think and reflect
终于，我想明白了 Finally, sense dawned
今天我可没有乞求神给我这份工作， 只是感谢他给我这样的人生 Today I didn't beg God for this job, just thanked him for this life
如果我被拒了，我也不后悔 If you reject me, no regrets
我这一生仍会去做些有价值的事 I'll still do something worthwhile with my life
你这样直率的行为，对我们公司可不利啊 Such frank behavior is not good for our firm
我们更需要富有外交言辞的人来应对我们的客户 We need someone diplomatic to handle clients
你太直爽了 You're too straightforward
但是... But...
如果你保证，你能控制你这种态度 if you assure us you'll control this attitude
我们可以考虑你 we may consider you
断了两条腿 才让我真正站起来 It took two broken legs to get me up on my feet
好不容易获得了这种态度 Wasn't easy to get this attitude
我不会改变的，先生 Can't change it, sir
你们留着这份工作吧，而我保留我的态度 You keep your job... I'll keep my attitude
对不起，恕我冒犯，先生 I'm sorry, no offense, sir
等等 Wait
做了25年面试 我面了无数应聘者 I've interviewed countless candidates for 25 years
为了得到工作，每个人都变成了应声虫 Everyone turns into a yes-man to get the job
你是从哪里冒出来的，孩子？ Where did you spring from, son?
先生？ Sir?
我们来谈谈薪水好吗？ Shall we discuss the salary?
谢谢您，先生 Thank you, sir
陛下，您真伟大 Your Majesty, thou art great
请接受这微薄的供奉吧 Accept this humble offering
戈文 ! Govind !
你说过的，如果他得到工作就，就刮了的 You had said, 'If he gets a job, shave it off'
你都做了什么？ What have you done?
胡子没了，感觉自己赤身裸体 I feel naked without my moustache
我的尊严没了 I've lost my dignity
我不会投降的，拉斯托吉 I won't accept defeat, Rastogi
除非你期末考试过了，不然这工作你还是拿不到 The job isn't yours until you pass your final exam
这次，就让我来出考卷 And this time, I will set the question paper
爸，这样不公平 Dad, that's not fair
在爱和战争中 没有什么是不公平的 Everything is fair in Love and War
而这场就是世界大战...三 And this is World War... III
拉斯托吉，你死定了 Rastogi, you're dead meat
嘿 Hey
你还这里干什么？ What're you doing here?
小心 Be careful
- 你一直在喝 - 是啊, 喝了好几瓶 You've been drinking - Yup, had to down a couple
几瓶太多了 A couple too many
- 来壮胆 - 干嘛呢？ Needed the guts - For what?
- 偷这个啊 - 这是什么？ For stealing this - What's this?
病毒办公室的副钥 The duplicate key to Virus's office
试卷在爸爸那个有红封印的信封里 The question paper's in a cover with a red seal
爸出的，让拉朱考不过的 Dad has set it, to fail Raju
去拿啊 Go get it
你是疯了还是 - 这是作弊啊 Are you mad or what - that's cheating
在爱和战争中 没有什么是不公平的 Everything's fair in Love and War
告诉我... Tell me something...
你真的觉得... Do you really feel...
亲吻的时候鼻子会碰上么？ the noses collide while kissing?
等下，来块咚可拉吧 Wait. Have some dhokla
你们古吉拉特人那么可爱 You Gujaratis are so cute
可你们的食物怎么听起来那么危险呢？ But why does your food sound so dangerous?
咚可拉, 伐夫拉, 函德瓦, 择谱拉, 可哈克阿 Dhokla, Fafda, Handwa, Thepla, Khakhra
听起来像导弹似的 Sound like missiles
过来 C'mon
“今天布什向伊拉克投了两枚咚可拉” 'Today Bush dropped two Dhoklas on Iraq'
“造成400人死亡，200人受伤” '400 dead, 200 injured'
来吧 C'mon
嗯？ Oh...
我应付得了可哈克阿, 伐夫拉 可是你的名字... I can deal with Khakhra, Fafda. But your name...
“昂史奥格斯 刹玛德斯 忏查特” - 唉 'Ranchhoddas Shamaldas Chanchad' - Yuck
结婚前我可不会改姓的 I won't change my last name after marriage
皮娅, 我们不能结婚 Pia, we can't get married
为什么？ Why?
你喜欢别人么？ Is there someone else?
不是 No
- 同性恋？ - 不是 Are you gay? - No
那为什么不向我求婚？ Then why don't you propose to me?
- 你性无能？ - 不是 Are you impotent? - No
不是就证明下 Then prove it
皮娅，不要啊 Pia, no
停下，停下 Stop, stop
- 怎么了？ - 我们还没告诉皮娅 What happened? - We didn't inform Pia
这里停，我膀胱要炸掉了 Stop here, my bladders are bursting
- 闭嘴 - 你和她有联系吗？ Shut up ! - Are you in touch with her?
- 没.. 我有她家电话，我打给她 - 那我停车 No... I have her home number Then call her, I'll stop
喂 你好 Hello
这乡下都没地方尿液排出 No place for urine-expulsion in this country
- 喂，皮娅在吗？ - 她不在 Hello, is Pia there? - No, she's not
她在医院上班？ Is she at the hospital?
她去医院干嘛？ Why would she be there?
她今天结婚啊 - 在马拉里 She's getting married today - in Manali
来不及了，她结婚了 Too late ! She's married
来得及，去那里6个小时路程 Not yet. It's a six hour drive
我们冲回去，可以在宣誓前赶到 If we rush, we'll reach before the vows
你们说什么？ What do you say?
很明显，我们要返回去 It's a no-brainer. Let's turn back
不许回去 No turning back
直接去拉达克，我们见了兰彻再回去 Straight to Ladakh. We'll meet Rancho and return
我星期五还要和法撒克 旺度会面 I have a Friday meeting with Phunsukh Wangdu
上车 Get into the car
如果我没去会面，日本人就会找他麻烦 If I miss my meeting, the Japanese will get him
公司名字里有他们的姓 They're offering him a first name in the company
“法撒克 和 弗吉亚饰”，利润共享 'Phunsukh and Fujiyashi', profit sharing...
- 皮娅和苏哈斯的婚礼 - 谢了你这西服 Pia weds Suhas - Thanks for the suit
病毒会发心脏病的 Virus will have a heart attack
每次他女儿婚礼 我们都来抢 At every daughter's wedding, we're there to rock the party
听好，我去通知皮娅，你去剥了那个标价条 Listen, I'll update Pia, you peel off the price tag
- 法汉 - 我们找到兰彻了 Farhan - We found Rancho
- 给107房间的？ - 是的，先生 For Room 1 07? - Yes, sir
- 怎么那么久才送来 - 对不起，先生 You've taken ages - Sorry, sir
快走 Off, now
- 家政，先生 - 请进 Housekeeping, sir - Come in
爱神啊，爱神啊 Amore... Amore...
快，把我外套熨好 Quick, iron my coat
爱神啊，爱神啊 Amore... Amore...
我们找到了兰彻，你不能嫁给这个混球 We found Rancho ! Now you can't marry this ass
你疯了，法汉 You're mad, Farhan
别骗自己了，皮娅，你还爱着兰彻 Don't fool yourself, Pia. You still love Rancho
你还吃着他最爱的食物 You're still eating his favorite food
爱神啊，爱神啊 Amore... Amore...
他无可救药了，标价条就是标价条 He's incorrigible. Once a price tag, always a price tag
闭嘴 法汉，苏哈斯已经变了 Shut up, Farhan. Suhas is a changed man
他不再说牌子和价钱了 He doesn't speak of brands and prices anymore
我15万的外套！！ My 150,000/ - coat
你们怎么就那么爱酱料？ Why do you people eat sauce?
- 我会解决的，先生 - 怎么解决？ I'll sort it out, sir - How?
我们洗衣房最拿手的就是洗薄荷酱了 Our laundry specializes in cleaning mint-stained suits
我一会儿就能除掉 I'll clean it in a jiffy
马上弄好 Get it soon
- 可现在太迟了，法汉 - 皮娅 But it's too late now, Farhan - Pia
走吧，皮娅, 要迟了 Let's go, Pia, we're late
皮娅，是我，拉朱 别喊， 不然他们会打了我的 Pia, it's me... Raju. Don't yell, they'll kill me
苏哈斯呢？ Where is Suhas?
家政把我外套拿去了 Housekeeping took my coat
去.. 把苏哈斯换过来 Go... Send Suhas here
离开庆典可就太粗野了 It's rude to leave the ceremony
- 喂, 法汉？ - 车准备好了 Yeah, Farhan? - The car's ready
抓住她的手就跑 你别动 Grab her hand and run. Don't move
- 先生... - 我外套呢？ Sir... - My coat?
你怎么在这里... You're here...
- 那圣坛上的是谁？ - 圣坛？ So who's at the altar? - Altar?
再转几圈 我们可就成婚了 Another couple of rounds, and we'll be considered married
可我已经结婚了，皮娅，走吧 I'm already married, Pia. Let's go
太迟了，人们会笑话我的 It's too late. People will laugh at me
那会让你自杀吗？ So you'll commit suicide?
拉斯托吉 Rastogi
人们会说长道短一会儿， 然后就忘了这事 People will gossip briefly, then forget
可你呢，你会一辈子后悔 But you... you'll regret on your deathbed
车在外面等着，兰彻触手可及... that the car was at the gate, Rancho within reach...
就因为怕人说，你嫁给那个混球 but in fear of people, you married this ass
家政？ Housekeeping?
皮娅，有个小问题 Pia, minor problem
什么？ What?
我们不知道兰彻结婚了没有 We don't know if Rancho's married
什么 What
- 他不可能结婚的 - 如果他结了呢？ He won't be married - And if he is?
那我们就送你回去 Then we'll drop you back
放松点！ 手工饼干？ Relax! Handmade biscuit?
他在这里干嘛？ What's he doing here?
- 别管他 - 这饼干很好的 Ignore him - The biscuit's very good
昨天，我还是尊纪守法的公民 Till yesterday, I was a law-abiding citizen
可过去的24小时里 我迫降了一航班 But in the last 24 hours, I'd grounded an aircraft
差点把刹玛德斯的骨灰倒进马桶里 almost assigned Shamaldas's ashes to the sewers, and
让一个新娘在婚礼上出逃！都是为了兰彻 made a bride elope from her own wedding! All for Rancho
可他也会为朋友做任何事情的 But he too would do anything for friends
就像从狮口中偷试卷... Like stealing the question paper... from the lion's den
红色封印的信封 Envelope with the red seal
他怕拉朱不及格，然后又去跳楼 He feared that if Raju failed, there'd be another high jump
我们曾是有原则的小偷，就只是为了拉朱而去偷试卷 We were principled thieves, stealing the paper only for Raju
我们自己看都不会看一眼 We'd sworn we won't even take a peek
藏在哪里了呢... Where's it hidden...
找得人都老了，问皮娅吧 We'll grow old searching Ask Pia
皮娅，你电话 Pia, your phone
嘿 要当爸爸的， 你说一说 “All is well”他就要踢了 Mr. Papa-To-Be If you say 'All is well', he kicks
他踢了 He kicked
皮娅，你的电话 （爸爸办公室） Pia, your phone
找到了！兰彻 Found it! Rancho
喂？ Hello?
快，复印一下 Quick, photocopy this
原来放在哪里的？ Where was it?
放回去 Put it back
- 安全了！ - 你们去哪里了？ We're safe ! - Where were you?
- 给你 - 这是什么？ Here - What's this?
礼物 A gift
试卷，病毒出的题，让你不及格的 Question paper. Virus set it himself, to fail you
奇怪的朋友 Strange buddies
先是教你要正直，然后给你一条可耻的路 First teach you to be upright, then offer a path to shame
我不干 No way
我过了，也肯定是我自己的努力过的 If I pass, it'll be on my own steam
要是没过，那也没什么 If I don't, it's still ok
他让我们折服了，我要像家人一样拥抱他... He'd won us over! I felt like embracing him as family...
可我还是控制了我的情绪 but then I controlled my emotions
- 可耻的贼 - 先生，别打，先生 Damn thief - Sir, please, sir
- 骗子 - 对不起，先生 Rascal - Sorry sir
还想要改变体制 Wanted to change the system
- 你还是在我门口撒尿吧 - 先生，你干嘛啊 You'll pee on my door - Sir, what're you doing
对不起 先生 Sorry sir
你们被勒令退学了！ You are rusticated !
明天早上你们还没搬走，我就报警 If all of you aren't out by morning, I'll call the police
我就去报警 I will call the police
一群骗子 Rascals
骗子，全是骗子 Rascals, all of you
他是怎么拿到我办公室钥匙的？ How did he get my office key?
我给他的，爸 I gave him the key, Dad
我真希望我给了弟弟把这钥匙 ...那么他今天就还活着 I wish I'd given this key to my brother... He'd be alive today
别说了，皮娅 Stop it, Pia
你以为你儿子是火车上摔下死的？ You think your son fell off a train and died?
闭嘴，皮娅 Shut up, Pia
你一定要他做工程师 You decided he'd be an engineer
可你有没有问过他想要做什么？ Did you ever ask him what he wanted to be?
你把那么多压力加在他身上... You put such pressure on him...
到入学考试的时候他就选择了死亡 that he chose death over the entrance exam
我不明白... I don't understand...
爸，你回房间去 Dad, you go to your room
皮娅，别这么做 Pia, don't do this
他想学文学，当作家 He wanted to study Literature, be a writer
可他能写的就只有这封自杀遗书 But all he wrote was this suicide note
收起来，求你了 Put that away, please
不要再掩饰了！ No more cover-ups !
就一次... Just once...
如果你说－如果你不想就不要学工程 if you'd said - Don't do Engineering if you don't want to
按你心里想做的去学 just do what your heart is in
那他今天就还活着 then he'd be alive today
他就不会自杀 He didn't commit suicide
是的，爸 You're right, Dad
不是自杀... It wasn't suicide...
是谋杀！ It was murder
许多城市道路被完全淹没 Many city roads are completely submerged
交通不得不中止 Traffic has come to a standstill
爸... Dad...
莫纳？ Mona?
毫米，快回去，干嘛跟着我们？ Go back, Millimeter. Why're you following us?
干嘛听你的？路是你爸开的？ Why? Your pop owns the road?
请帮帮忙，我们走投无路了 Please help, we are desperate here
你们不能派救护车来？ You can't send an ambulance?
那去别的医院弄一辆啊 Get it from another hospital
整个地市都淹了，先生，我们无能为力 The entire city's flooded, sir. We're helpless
莫纳，你还好吧？ Mona, you ok?
兰彻，是皮娅 Rancho, Pia
兰彻，你到不了我这里，按我说的去做 Rancho, you can't reach here. Do as I say
羊膜已经破了！ The water bag has burst
断了！ 莫纳 Disconnected ! Mona
莫纳！ Mona !
- 打开灯 - 搬到哪里？ Turn on the lights - Where to?
- 乒乓球桌上 - 皮娅，我们在休息室了 To the table tennis table - Pia, we're in the common room
拉朱，打开摄像头 Raju, turn on the web camera
莫纳在哪里？让我看看 Where's Mona? Show me
等一下 Hold on
这里，皮娅 Here, Pia
莫纳，别当心，有我在 Mona, don't worry. I'm with you
皮娅，我要死了 Pia, I'm dying!
兰彻，即使没有医院或医生 Rancho, even when there were no hospitals or docs
胎儿也能产下的 babies were delivered
你们一起生产这个胎儿 You all will deliver this baby
Aal izz well All is well
好大胆！我杀了你们 How dare you? I'll kill you
爸，你别管这个 Dad, stay out of this
法汉，拿毛巾和剪刀来 Farhan, get towels and scissors
毫米，拿些布条和热水 Millimeter, get clothes clips and hot water
兰彻，把莫纳盖上 Rancho, cover Mona
莫纳，用力推 Mona, try pushing
用全身力气 Push with all your might
别喊，我做不到 Stop it! I can't do it
兰彻，看看初露了没有 Rancho, check if there's crowning
初露...？ Crowning...?
把那图拿来 Get that diagram
看到没，看看头有没有露出来 See if the head is coming out
快去看 Check quickly
去啊 Go
去，兰彻，去啊 Go, Rancho, go
没，没初露 No crowning
莫纳，请用力推 Mona, please push
莫纳！ Mona !
很累了，皮娅 She's tired, Pia
叫醒她！如果她不推，问题就大了 Wake her! If she won't push, it's a big problem
- 他们要用真空吸盘 - 他们哪里找去？ They need a vacuum cup - Where will they get one?
真空吸盘什么样的？怎么用？ What's a vacuum cup? How is it used?
我给你看 I'll show you
如果妈妈太疲劳了不能推， 就把吸盘放在胎儿头上 If the mother's too fatigued to push, a cup is placed on baby's head
抽吸证吸盘吸在头上... Suction makes the cup stick to the head...
然后把胎儿拉出来 and the baby is pulled out
- 我可以做一个 - 怎么做？ I can make this - How?
- 用吸尘器 - 吸尘器？ With a vacuum cleaner - Vacuum cleaner?
对 Yes
压强太大了 That pressure's too high
- 我会控制好的 - 你有吸尘器吗？ I'll control it - D'you have a vacuum cleaner?
有，在办公室 Yes, in my office
- 法汉，快去拿来 - 钥匙在这里 Farhan, rush and get it - Here's the key
莫纳，推啊 Mona, push
天啊 Oh my God
怎么了？ What happened?
- 拉朱，发生什么事了？ - 停电了 Raju, what happened? - The power's gone
那吸尘器怎么开起来？ How'll the vacuum work now?
法汉，你去拿吸尘器，我去弄电来 Farhan, you get the vacuum, I'll get the power.
怎么弄？ How?
毫米，把病毒搬出去 Millimeter, get Virus out
这太荒谬了！ What nonsense is this !
不是这个病毒，是我的病毒，我的那个发明 Not this Virus. My Virus, the inverter
- 去拿，快点 - 好 Get that, quick - Ok
拉朱，把宿舍的人叫醒 Raju, wake up the hostel
把车里的电池，电线拿来，还有真空计 Get car batteries, wires, and a vacuum gauge
休息室需要急救！ Emergency in the common room !
- 兰彻呢？ - 这里，先生 Where's Rancho? - Here, sir
把电池都放这里...还有电线 Keep the batteries here ... and the wires
拉朱，把开关都关了，把那发明连到主线上 Raju, switch off everything, connect the inverter to the mains
兰彻，吸尘器 Rancho, vacuum cleaner
法汉，你的镜头清洁器 Farhan, get your lens cleaner
- 橡胶皮吹？ - 对，拿过来 Blower? - Yeah, get it
兰彻，给你 Rancho, blower
好，把这个装到真空计上 Good. Fix this to the gauge
兰彻，好了 Rancho, I'm done
- 开关都关上了？ - 是的 All switches off? - Yes
把球桌和电脑的开关打开 Hit the table and computer switches
好 Ok
拉朱，开电脑 Raju, turn on the computer
法汉，给你 Farhan, here
皮娅，快过来 Pia, come here quick
爱死你了，兰彻 Love you, Rancho
- 法汉，把它打开 - 好 Farhan, turn it on - Ok
皮娅，要多少吸力？ Pia, how much suction?
不超过0.5 Not more than 0.5
- 法汉, 0.5 - 盖住 Farhan, 0.5 - Cover it
0.5 0.5
吸尘器吸胎儿！有什么胎儿还生不下来 Vacuum cleaner baby! Mother of all deliveries
法汉，可以了 Farhan, stop
好 Ok
拉朱，到桌边去 Raju, get on the table
把胎儿往下推，像这样 Push the baby down, like this
好 好 Ok
法汉，打开 Farhan, turn it on
加油，你做得到 C'mon, you can do it
加油，推 C'mon, push
为了忏朴，推啊 Do it for Champ
加油，莫纳 C'mon, Mona
他要出来了 He's coming out
你做得到的 You can do it
对 莫纳，推 Yes Mona, push
法汉，可以关了 Farhan, turn it off
好，关 Ok, off
两个夹子，剪开脐带 Two clips, cut the umbilical cord
法汉，脐带夹两个夹子 Farhan, two clips on the cord
- 拿剪刀 - 小心 Get scissors - Be careful
从中间剪，拿条毛巾 Cut at the center, get a towel
皮娅，他没哭 Pia, he's not crying
嘿 忏朴！ Hey Champ !
兰彻，摩他的背 Rancho, rub his back
- 嘿 忏朴 - 加油啊，忏朴 Hey Champ - Come on, Champ
不行，没反应 No, nothing
往他嘴里吹气 Blow air into his mouth
加油啊，忏朴 C'mon, Champ
没反应 No response
快 莫纳，快说-Aal izz well Hush Mona, say - All is well
他踢了 He kicked
什么？ What?
他踢了一脚 He kicked
说 - Aal izz well Say - All is well
Aal izz well All is well
如果病毒说，“我的孙子将是一名工程师” If Virus had said, 'My grandson will be an engineer'
我就打烂他下巴 I would've broken his jaw
但当他最终说话时，我们都惊讶了 But when he finally spoke, he stunned us
踢得好！想当足球运动员吗？ What a kick! Wanna be a footballer?
做你想做的吧 Be what you want to be
等下 - 我和你还没完 Wait - I've not finished with you !
入学第一天，你就问了我一个问题... First day of college, you'd asked me a question...
为什么宇航员太空中不用铅笔？ Why didn't astronauts use a pencil in space?
如果铅笔断了 If a pencil tip breaks
就会在零重力下漂浮，然后就跑到 人的眼睛里，鼻子里，仪器里... it'd float in zero gravity. Get into eyes, nose, instruments...
你错了!你错了! You were wrong
你不可能每次都对 You cannot be right all the time
懂吗？ You understand?
懂，先生 Yes, sir
这是一个很重要的发明 This was an important invention
懂吗？ You understand?
懂，先生 Yes, sir
我的主任对我说 “如果你碰上一个杰出的学生...” My Director said, 'When you find an extraordinary student...'
去吧，学习去吧，把考试过了然后离开 Go, study Pass your exams and leave
现在，制度最佳学生... And now, Student of the Year...
昂史奥格斯 刹玛德斯 忏查特 Ranchhoddas Shamaldas Chanchad
先生，拍张照 Sir, one photo
我想拍下所有这些回忆，带回家去 I wanted to capture all these memories and take them home
那天，我们拥抱，我们欢庆，我们哭泣... That day, we hugged, we rejoiced, we cried...
我们决定此后我们每年至少相聚一次... We vowed that we'd meet at least once a year...
谁知道，那是我们最后一次见到兰彻... Who knew then, we were seeing Rancho for the last time
解开他 Untie him
我要在美国法庭上起诉你们 I'll sue you all in an American court
拉朱 Raju
只有兰彻才能建出这样的学校 Only Rancho can create a school like this
可他在哪里？ But where is he?
不许这里撒尿 Don't pee here
闪开，小东西 Go away creatures
- 不许这时撒尿 - 我拍死你们！ Don't pee here - I'll smack you
好 他不远了 Bingo He cannot be far
对不起，昂史奥格斯在哪里？ Excuse me, where is Ranchhoddas?
- 他不是昂史奥格斯！ - 兰彻... He's not Ranchhoddas ! - Rancho...
驰赫特.. 算了，他叫什么？ Chhote... Dammit, what's his name?
慢慢来，跟我走 Calm down. Come with me
- 他人呢？ - 兰彻 Where's he? - Rancho
法汉, 你所有的书他都看过了 Farhan, he's read all your books
拉朱，他每天读你的博客，很自豪地和孩子们分享 Raju, he reads your blog everyday. Proudly shares it with the kids
- 还记得你的头盔吗，皮娅？ - 它是偷过来的... Remember your helmet, Pia? It was stolen...
你是谁？怎么知道我们？ Who are you? How do you know us?
- 你不认识我啦？ - 不认识 Didn't you recognize me? - No
你们怎么认得出呢，毫米已经长成厘米了 How would you? Millimeter is now Centimeter
什么厘米，你可是千米了 Not Centimeter, you're Kilometer
你怎么到这里的？ How did you get here?
我收到一封里面有张火车票的信 I got a letter with a train ticket inside
上面说 - “想念学校吗？搭这趟火车吧”.. 我就来了 It said - 'Miss being in school? Catch this train'... I did
那个骗子兰彻 That rascal Rancho
那个傻瓜在哪里？ Where is that idiot?
道哲，你来飞 Dorje, you fly it
每天晚上你都开进我的 梦里，穿得像位新娘 Every night you ride into my dreams on a scooter, dressed as a bride
你掀起的是头盔，而不是面纱 Instead of a veil, you lift your helmet
走近我，要吻我 and come close to kiss me
走之前就不能告诉我么？ Couldn't you tell me before leaving?
不能 No
对不起 Sorry
你结婚了吗？ Did you marry?
什么？没啊 What? No
- 你呢？ - 差一点.. 傻瓜 You? - Almost... Idiot
那么 So?
那么什么？ So what?
你爱着一个人？ Do you love someone?
嗯 Yes
谁？ Who?
你 You
看到没，鼻子不会碰上，傻瓜 See, the noses don't collide, stupid
没错 That's right
兰彻 Rancho
嗨.. 法汉 Hi... Farhan
去你的“嗨” Screw your 'Hi'
- 嘿, 听我说... - 不, 你听我说 Hey, listen to me... - No, you listen to me
我来解释所有的事情 I can explain everything
嗨.. 拉朱 Hi... Raju
我们找你找得多苦 How we hunted for you
你就打个电话的硬币都没有啊？ Didn't have a coin for one phone call?
把我的那几下也算上 Add a couple from me too
- 骗子，无赖 - 放开他吧 Rascal, scoundrel - Let him go now
好，好，够了 Ok ok, enough
起来，快点 On your feet, c'mon
有意思吧，傻瓜们？ Having fun, idiots?
嘿.. 嗨 查图尔 Hey... Hi Chatur
昂史奥格斯 忏查特，你好啊，老师先生 Ranchhoddas Chanchad. How do you do, Mr. Teacher?
哇，你是一个乡村老师 - A是苹果，B是球... Wow, you're a teacher in a village - A for Apple, B for Ball...
我们的火车一起出发的， 可你的却往回开了... Our trains left together. But yours traveled in reverse...
从工程师开到小学老师 from engineer to primary teacher
你工资多少，忏查特？5000? What's your salary, Chanchad? 5000 /-?
对我来说那就是区区100美元 For me that's $ 100
我儿子零花钱比你工资还高 My son's pocket money is more than your salary
- 别满嘴喷粪 - 那粪可是他给的 Cut the crap - Crap is what he gave us
想要变换教育体制，变换世界 Wanted to change the education system, change the world
最终换的是什么？小孩的尿布 Finally what does he change? Kids' diapers
你去打烂他下巴，要么我来 You gonna break his jaw or should I?
放松 Just relax
记得我说过什么吗？总有一天我笑你哭 Remember I'd said one day you'd cry and I'd laugh?
这里签字，接受吧 - 你输了，我赢了 Sign here. Accept - You lost, I won !
“失败宣言”！真不敢相信 'Declaration of Defeat' ! Unbelievable, man
- 查图尔 - 真疯狂 Chatur - Crazy guy
嘿，这是病毒的笔！你在用？ Hey, this is Virus's pen ! You pinched it?
你就别多想了 Forget it, man
这是给胜利者的，不是失败者的 This is for winners, not losers
如果你的学校需要帮助，打给我助理要点捐款 If your school ever needs help, call my assistant for a donation
A是苹果，B是球... A for Apple, B for Ball...
- 他一点都没变！ - 别管他 He hasn't changed at all! - Ignore him
满嘴喷粪 He's full of crap
太好了 你不叫昂史奥格斯 忏查特 Good news is your name isn't Ranchhoddas Chanchad
想想看，不然结婚后我就是皮娅 忏查特 - 难听 Imagine, after marriage, I'm Pia Chanchad - Yuck
对了，你真名是什么？ By the way, what is your real name?
法撒克 旺度 Phunsukh Wangdu
旺度? Wangdu?
皮娅 旺度 ! Pia Wangdu !
你是说你是那个科学家？ You mean you're a scientist?
你有400项专利？ You have 400 patents?
结婚后我不要改姓 I won't change my name after marriage
你就是查图尔要找的旺度? You mean you're Chatur's Wangdu?
你就是日本人想要讨好的？ It's you the Japanese are wooing?
我不喜欢旺度 I don't like Wangdu
那你是科学家还是老师吧？ Are you a scientist or a teacher?
科学家啊，但我也教孩子们 Scientist, but I also teach children
那 你就是那个法撒克 旺度? So you are TH E Phunsukh Wangdu?
对啊，对啊 Yes, yes
- 嘿 消音器 - 嘿 查图尔，回来 Hey Silencer - Hey Chatur, come back
来吧 Take that
等等，我让他停下 Wait, I'll stop him
旺度先生，真不敢相信是你 Mr. Wangdu, I can't believe it's you
对不起啊，查图尔先生 I'm sorry, Mr. Chatur
我签不了和你公司的那笔交易了 I can't sign the deal with your company
什么？为什么，先生？ What sir? Why sir?
我怎么签啊？你把我的笔都拿走了 How do I sign, man? You took my pen
什么笔啊，先生？我听不懂... What pen, sir? I didn't get you...
你手里的那支啊－病毒的笔 The one in your hand - Virus's pen
旺度先生？...？ Mr. Wangdu...?
没错，查图尔？ Yes, Chatur?
A是苹果，B是球... （法撒克 旺度） A for Apple, B for Ball is...
... S是被整 .... S for Screwed
你把我弄糊涂了，兰彻 - 我是说，旺度先生 You got me, Rancho - I mean, Mr. Wangdu
彻底把我打倒了，真不错 Totally floored me. Good one
我希望我们间的私人恩怨不会影响这笔交易 I hope our personal problems won't affect this deal
嘿 查图尔 - 来啊 Hey Chatur - take that
刚才我只是在开玩笑 I was just joking, man
我完全服输，我就知道你你会做出伟大的事的 Deep down, I knew you'd do great things
你在撒谎 You're fibbing
不，真不是，我发誓 No, really, I swear
兰彻 - 100分, 查图尔 - 0分 Rancho - 100, Chatur - 0
你赢了，我输了，你不相信我 You win, I lose. You don't believe me?
他要放屁了 Beware of farts
陛下，您真伟大，请接受这微薄的供奉吧 Your Majesty, thou art great. Accept this humble offering
免费建议, 旺度先生 - 为了你的生活，快逃 Free advice, Mr. Wangdu - Run for your life
兰彻，不签我会失业的啊，我孩子们都还小... Rancho, I'll lose my job, man. I have small kids...
我们那位神圣的领袖 昂史奥格斯 曾经正确地说过 His Holiness Guru Ranchhoddas had correctly stated
- 追求卓越，成功就会出其不意找上门 - Follow Excellence... Success will chase you, pants down
感谢观赏
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