大家没事吧 Is everybody ok?
我没事 谢谢你没丢下我 I'm fine. Thanks for waiting.
发生什么事了 What was that?
水管和煤气管爆炸的逃生方式都一样 Water either gas line, the training is the same.
大家弯腰前行 马上离开房子 People, just stay low and move out.
老公 卢克不见了 Honey, Luke's gone.
克莱尔 人体自燃十分少见 Claire, spontaneous human combustion is very rare.
我不觉得是他自爆了 菲尔 I don't think he exploded, Phil.
绳梯很管用 至少有人是按规程来的 The rope ladder works. At least someone followed protocol.
是那个 Oh! Oh, it's there!
烟是从卢克该死的魔术箱里冒出来的 Smoke is coming out of Luke's stupid suitcase.
有其父必有其子 卢克也是个魔术师 Like his old man, Luke is a magician.
教我魔术的是我爸上网搜来的大师 I'm taking lessons from some guy my dad found online.
他可是有莫德斯托巫师大会 He came personally recommended from the guy who runs
举办者的个人推荐呢 The Warlock Conference up in Modesto.
此位有人了 大块头 Ocupad, big guy.
请另寻良枝吧 Find another foxhole.
*大家跟我一起学唱歌* *This is how we learn to sing*
*谁来跟我一起唱* *Who can go up here with me?*
小卡要去本地中学当音乐老师了 Cam took a job teaching music at the local middle school.
明天就是上班第一天 Yeah, his first day is tomorrow.
我为自己开心 I'm excited for me,
但更为我的学生开心 but I'm probably more excited for the students
因为优秀的老师是天赐的礼物 because a great teacher is a gift.
还没正式上岗呢 Hasn't started yet.
我要向我的高中音乐老师致敬 I have to tip my hat to my high school music teacher...
此人带有自然的魔力 A real force of nature
同时身兼橄榄球队的防守员 who was also the defensive coordinator for the football team
和农场动物俱乐部的牛犊接生监察员 and supervised calf birthing for the animal husbandry club.
朵莉丝·奥尔森 一位伟大的女士 Doris Olson. Great lady.
好一位女士 Lady.
*大家跟我一起学唱歌* *This is how... we learn to sing*
■
本字幕由 YYeTs人人影视 原创翻译制作 仅供学习 禁止用于任何商业盈利行为 更多影视更新 请登陆 www.YYeTs.com
■
翻译：慕秋雪 Wendyshark 猫中之王
■
翻译：独醉 olivia_xuxu 小饭
■
时间轴：菜六水 校对：伊森·D·泽生 后期&总监：瓜瓜
家 庭
摩 登
第四季 第四集
杰 我会想死你的 Ay, Jay, I'm going to miss you.
只是一晚上而已 It's one night.
不 我不想和你分离 No, I don't want to be without you,
我这辈子一晚都不能离开你 not even one night in my whole life.
我能为你做点什么 What can I make you?
在床上给我腾点位置怎么样 How about a little room on my side of the bed?
我是不该抱怨 我老婆美艳动人 但是 I mean, I shouldn't complain. My wife's a knockout. But...
她现在处于孕期中的某个阶段 she's at that place in her pregnancy
她变得臃肿 where, she's, you know... ample.
还打呼噜 And the snoring.
我发誓 上一张超音波片里婴儿是这样的 I swear in the last ultrasound, the baby was like this...
我明天中午就能到家 So I should be home about noon tomorrow.
谁把咖啡都喝完了 Who drank all the coffee?
我喝了不少 Oh, I, uh, I had quite a bit of that.
我最近晚上睡得不太好 You know, I haven't, um, been sleeping too well.
失眠的原因说来也挺好笑 There's actually a funny story about what's causing that.
妈 我非常理解您的身体正经历着变化 Mom, I'm fully aware of the changes your body is going through,
鼻塞也是怀孕时常见的现象 and that nasal stuffiness is very common during pregnancy,
但家里的情况已经刻不容缓了 but we got a crisis in this house.
你打呼太严重了 我帮你买了呼吸辅助贴 You've been snoring. But I got you these nasal strips.
广告里 In the commercial,
连老头如雷般的呼噜声也能化为轻柔之音 the old man's angry red sound waves turn a gentle blue.
-所以我打呼像老头子吗 -不是 - So I'm like an old man? - No!
那我是像狗 还是像猪 Like a dog then? A pig?
怎么 曼尼 我是老头子 还是狗或猪 What is it, Manny? I'm an old man, a dog, or a pig?
杰 帮我说两句 你也听到呼声了 Jay, help me out here. You've heard it.
我完全不知道这孩子在说什么 I don't know what the boy's talking about.
如果这是青春期的曼尼 我可不喜欢 If this is a glimpse of teenage Manny, I don't love it.
你妈这么漂亮 你要尊重她 Have a little respect for your beautiful mother.
谢谢你 杰 Thank you, Jay.
你说得对 我错了妈妈 You're right. Sorry, mom.
杰 And, Jay,
祝你在旧金山玩得愉快 Have a great trip to San Francisco.
莉莉到校的时间是8点45到50之间 Okay, Lily's drop-off time is between 8:45 and 8:50,
所以你应该能来得及9点上班 so you should be fine to get work by 9.
这是她背包内容的清单 Here is her checklist for her backpack.
我一切都计划好了 Oh, I have this whole thing planned.
我款款步入教室 脱下我的外套 Okay, I'm gonna walk in, take off my jacket,
大声宣布 高音号在此 and say, "Here comes treble."
上班第一天扭得挺欢啊 Big swing on the first day.
请不要打击我的热情 Please don't tamp down my enthusiasm.
好了 还有什么 Okay, what else?
对了 调光器的开关有问题 Oh! The dimmer came in for the switch,
你去请个电工来 但是别找Brad so I want you to call the electrician, but not Brad.
还记得上次我们为账单和他不太愉快吗 Remember? We had a problem with him last time about the billing.
因为他想要名列账单[演员表]前茅 He wanted his name above the title?
你讲过这个笑话了 好可爱好好笑 Yes, you've done that joke before. So cute. So funny.
还有什么 哦 What else? Oh!
莉莉需要为吉奥的生日派对准备礼物 Lily needs to get a present for Gio's birthday party.
别被请帖迷惑了 And don't be thrown by the invitation.
是海盗主题派对 不是普拉提健身派对 It is a pirates party, not a pilates party.
过来坐好 我再说说果汁盒的事 Now sit. I wanna talk juice boxes.
小卡 小卡 我知道你现在什么状况 Cam. Cam, I know what's happening here.
你第一天上班 感觉特别紧张 You're feeling very anxious about your first day at work,
然后你把焦虑转移到我和莉莉身上 And you're focusing that anxiety on my day with Lily.
真的吗 你不觉得 Really? Are you sure I'm not
我对这第一天充满了信心吗 completely confident about my first day
人家肯定满分表现啦 because it's gonna be a home run.
而我担心你 是因为你的任务 And I am worried about you because you're taking on
可不只是照顾莉莉呢 a little bit more of the Lily load?
别怕 亲爱的 么哇 Don't be scared, sweetie. Mwah!
她才不怕呢 你这是干嘛 She's not scared! What are you doing?
-需要我就打电话给我 -不会的 - Just call me if you need me. - I won't!
非常感谢你控制一下我的期望值 And thank you for managing my expectations today.
但其实没必要 Not necessary.
我昨晚看到你在练习鞠躬 I saw you practicing a bow last night.
练着玩儿而已 That was just in fun.
因为我觉得那些孩子是不会 You know, I highly doubt some teenagers are gonna
往我脚边撒玫瑰花瓣的 throw rose petals at my feet.
但是我第一堂课结束后 But I wouldn't be surprised
掌声经久不息什么的也不足为奇 if I got slow-clapped out of my first class.
错了 Wrong.
我还在想呢 I am thinking.
如果你真的用脑在想 If you were thinking,
就不会把西雅图当成华盛顿州的首府了 you wouldn't have Seattle as the capital of Washington.
是斯波坎 It's Spokane.
好吧 那美国的第11任总统就成了 Sure, which makes the 11th president of the United States
[正确的应为詹姆斯·波尔克]
詹姆斯·波斯克 "James k. Pslk."
好了 艾丽克斯 别这样 Okay, Alex, stop.
我正在想呢 I'm trying to figure this out.
哔哔 时间到 笨蛋 是奥林匹亚 Buzz. Time's up, dummy. It's Olympia.
记得在表演时喊出那吓死人的行话哦 Make sure you sound out the big scary words.
妈妈 有件事让我很苦恼 Mom, something's on my mind, and it's really bothering me.
对啊 也让我很苦恼 Yeah, it's really bothering me, too,
但我觉得她以后可能会很有钱 But I think it's gonna be rich,
所以我们要对她好一点 so we better be nice to it.
我不想再学魔术了 I wanna quit magic.
什么 What?
我真的没什么兴趣了 I'm not really interested anymore,
但我想爸爸会不高兴的 but I don't think dad's gonna be happy.
宝贝 别担心让你爸爸失望 Oh, sweetheart. Don't worry about disappointing your father.
他只会希望你去做你真正喜欢的事 He only wants you to do it if you wanna do it.
不如这样吧 我跟你爸谈谈 Tell you what. I will talk to dad--
哇 跟老爸谈谈 一本正经的样子 Whoa! Talk to dad? That sounds serious.
不许嗑药 Don't do drugs.
不要逃学 Stay in school.
卢克不想再学魔术了 Luke wants to quit magic.
绝对不行 That's not happening.
晚上见吧 Well, see you guys at dinner.
亲爱的 你完全不想谈谈这事儿吗 Sweetheart, don't you even want to talk about this?
有什么好谈的 我儿子天生就是这块料 What's to talk about? The kid's a natural.
他天赋异禀 He has everything--
双手灵活 行话精通 装备齐全 the hands, the patter, the outfits.
好吧 我们设想一下 Okay, let's play this out.
即使他是万里挑一的好苗子 Even if he is one in a million,
最好的结果又如何 what's our best case scenario here?
他会变成什么 He becomes, what...
一个专业的魔术师 A professional magician!
亲爱的 这孩子就是有这天赋 Honey, the boy has a gift.
你想白白浪费这天赋吗 You wanna just throw that away?
那才不是什么白白浪费 I don't think it's about throwing it away.
而是你逼着他 I think it's about you pushing him--
我能插两句话吗 Don't I get a say in any of this?
很遗憾我不像你那么喜欢魔术 I'm sorry I don't like magic as much as you,
但我真不喜欢 but I don't.
这与魔术无关 This isn't about magic.
确实 而是我的人生你做主 No, it's about my life and you controlling it.
听着 你许下承诺 就该信守承诺 Look, you made a commitment. You will honor that commitment.
我最讨厌这个 Ugh! I hate it here!
卢克 Luke!
好了 年轻的女士们先生们 All right, young ladies and gentlemen,
请听我说 好吗 if I can have your attention, please.
大家坐坐好 Let's settle down
跟邻座的同学和无趣的生活 and let's say a temporary good-bye to your neighbor
暂时告个别 因为时代男高音来了 and to life as you know it, because here comes treble.
没错 下面的朋友们 时代最高音 That's right, my friends, we got treble,
就在弗兰克林中学 Right here at Franklin middle.
我是卡梅隆小T 韵脚是个小G I'm Cameron T., and that rhymes with "G,"
意思就是"古德猫林"[早上好] And that stands for "Good morning"!
请说 就爱有热情的 Huh? Yes! Love the enthusiasm.
说吧 第一个问题 Go ahead. First question.
纳玛奇老师什么时候回来 When's Mr. Namagachi coming back?
纳玛奇老师不会再回来了 Okay, Mr. Namagachi isn't coming back,
但我想向你们介绍一个人 But there is somebody that I'd like to introduce you to.
不知道你们是否正式见过面了 Don't know that you proy met.
她是我的好朋友 She's a good friend of mine,
她的名字就叫作 "音乐" and she goes by the name of "Music."
有时候我的朋友音乐很羞涩 And sometimes my friend music can be shy.
有时候则充满了愤怒 Sometimes she can be angry!
有时候又很欢腾 Sometimes she can be playful.
有时候则是非常 时髦[放克乐] And sometimes she can be downright a-funky!
大事不妙 Train wreck.
他肯定没跟米奇尔商量过要用这招 There's no way he ran this past Mitchell.
大爸通常停在学校的后门 Daddy always parks in the back of the school.
我知道 宝贝 但是 I know, sweetie, but, uh,
那里的停车位都被占了 those spots were all taken.
因为我们迟到了 Because we're late?
不是 我们才晚了一分钟 是因为堵车 No, we're, like, a minute late, and that's 'cause of traffic.
也因为我摔倒了 And because I tipped over.
你没系好我的安全座椅 You didn't snap my car seat right.
好吧 那一摔倒是没把你的记忆摔坏嘛 Okay, well, it certainly didn't hurt your memory any.
给你午餐 All right, here's your lunch.
你弄洒了 You spilled it!
盖子怎么开着呢 Oh! Why is the top open?
大爸都会替我拉上拉链的 Daddy always zips it for me.
或许你该自己拉上 Maybe you should zip it.
我可听到你的吐槽了 I heard that.
既然还剩几分钟时间 So with just a few more minutes left--
-纳玛奇老师 -以前在这里工作 - Mr. Namagachi-- - used to work here,
可他被开除了 明白吗 but he got fired, okay?
那么 现在 让我们用 So now let's form an orchestra
我最喜欢的乐器组成乐队吧 made up of my favorite instruments--
也就是你们美丽的身体 your beautiful bodies.
有点"变态"了 Gettin' creepy.
那么 你们负责拍桌子打节拍 Okay, so you guys are gonna be my, uh, table slappers.
你们是我的低音部 You're my bass line.
而后面这些同学就用嘴模仿小号的旋律 Okay, and you're gonna be mouth trumpeters in the back with the melody.
好的 现在 大家一起来 Okay, now let's bring it all together.
一 二 三 One, two, three.
低音部声音再柔和一点 The bass line is a little-- a little softer.
模仿小号的声音再大一些 Okay, louder with the mouth trumpets.
好极了 非常感谢你们 Okay. Great. Well, thank you so much.
我觉得今天棒极了 And, um, I thought it was a great first day.
各位同学 我喜欢与你们互相学习 And I love the give-and-take, everyone.
还有 And, um...
老爸 "西斯科"好玩吗 Hey, dad. How's Frisco?
我的会议早结束了 My meetings ended early.
我都不用在那儿过夜 I didn't even have to spend the night.
你也别再说"西斯科"了 And don't say "Frisco."
他们不喜欢别人把那里叫做"西斯科" They hate it when you call it "Frisco."
你怎么知道 How do you know what they hate?
你这辈子只去过那里两次 You've been there two times in your life.
爱咋咋地 我都一星期没睡觉了 Anyway, I haven't slept in a week.
歌洛莉亚打呼噜打得跟水牛似的 Gloria's snoring like a water buffalo.
她在怀孕嘛 肯定不舒服 Aw. Well, she's pregnant. It's uncomfortable.
她增肥了多少 15 20 25 30磅吗 What, she put on 15? 20? 25? 30?
别老问这个了 我要怎么跟她提这件事呢 We're not doing this again. How do I bring it up?
首先 你不要提 Well, for starters, you don't.
老实忍着吧 You suck it up.
老爸 你的辣妻 Dad, your hot wife
在你30岁的时候 她刚学走路 who was learning to walk when you were 30 years old,
现在她怀了你的娃 is pregnant with a baby you conceived
多少男人拼了命想跟她造个娃出来啊 doing something most men would kill to do.
-我就是太累了 -那点小牺牲 - I'm just so tired. - It's a small sacrifice
跟她所遭受的相比不值一提 小可怜 compared to what she's going through. Poor thing,
她增肥了多少磅 30 35 40 45 what with the extra... 30? 35? 40? 45?
够了 We're done.
好的 开始喽 这个怎么样 All right, here we go. How's this?
我们不买这种 That's not the kind we get.
好吧 Okay.
喂 你好 小卡 Hello? Hey, Cam.
又打电话查岗吗 Just checking in on me again?
是的 就想看看你有没有接到莉莉 Yeah. Just wanted to see if you got Lily.
接到了 我们刚到 我们在杂货店 Yeah, we're--we're just-- we're at the grocery store,
正逛得高兴呢 having a great time.
是吗 关于购物清单... Oh. Yeah. Any questions about the...
有什么问题吗 about the grocery list?
没有 我们正在买格兰诺拉燕麦片 No, we're just picking up the granola.
你怎么样 你的盛大登场如何 So how was it? How was the big debut?
在学校里是不是和孩子们 Was it a comfortable ride around the schoolyard
相处融洽 如鱼得水 on the shoulders of the children?
我反正是为人师表了一回 Well, I stood and delivered.
谢谢你冷嘲热讽的询问 Thank you for sarcastically asking.
可以 Yeah.
你有没有给电工打电话说调光器的事 Okay, did you call the electrician about the dimmer?
打了 当然打了 Yes. Yeah.
他现在正在另一条线上等待通话呢 Yeah, I'm on the other line with him right now.
好了 那我大概应该撂电话了 Oh, well, I should probably let you go.
看好莉莉 她特爱乱跑 Keep your eye on Lily. She has a tendency to wander off.
小卡 我 我当然能... Cam... Uh, wh-wh--I'm-- I'm totally capable of...
-你把她弄丢了 是不是 -没有没有 - You lost her, didn't you? - No. No, no, no, no.
没有 她就在我旁边 嗨 宝贝 No, she is right next to me. Hi, honey.
我能听出来什么情况 到乳制品柜里找找 I can hear it in your voice. Look in the dairy case.
小卡 你不会真以为我能弄丢... Cam, do you honestly think that I would lose...
那门拉不开 是滑开的 the doors don't pull. They slide.
就当你没见到过我 You never saw me.
非常感谢 Thank you very much.
我想了想 Look, um, I thought about it,
要是你特别想告别魔术 那就随你意 and if you really want to, you can quit magic.
只要 你最后做一件事 You just have to do one thing first--
表演"巴特勒逃脱术" execute the Butler's escape.
毫无疑问 巴特勒逃脱术 It goes without saying that the Butler's escape
是逃脱术中最具挑战性的特技 is one of the most challenging feats of escapology
是魔术师最高等级的表演之一 an illusionist can perform.
此魔术 正是基于 那著名的 It's--it's based, of course, on the well-known story
弗兰宁伯爵的男仆珀西的故事 of the Earl of Flanning's manservant Percy,
珀西被囚禁在伦敦塔里 who was imprisoned in the Tower of London,
众所周知 在被铐上枷锁的时候 and as we all know, refused to take off his uniform
他坚决不脱自己的制服 when he was shackled.
大家都知道 塔上的侍卫格特睡着后 Famously, as the, uh, tower guard Gert slept,
珀西挣脱了枷锁 悄悄跃过睡着的侍卫 Percy freed himself and leapt over the sleeping guard,
那句著名的俗语就从此而来... giving rise to the popular expression...
"珀西跃过格尔特" "Percy jumped the Gert."
你为什么要我做这个愚蠢的把戏 Why are you making me do this stupid trick?
我觉得你之所以不想学了 I think you're quitting...
是因为魔术难度越来越大 because magic's getting hard,
可是在任何事上 都不该因惧怕困难而退缩 and that's not a good reason for quitting anything.
但是... But...
如果你能成功 if you can do this,
我就知道你是真心不喜欢魔术 then I'll know that you genuinely don't like it,
就算你从事其他爱好 我也祝福你 and you'll have my blessing to pursue other interests.
不带附加条件 No strings attached.
抱歉 伙计 Sorry, buddy.
真抱歉 I'm so sorry.
你在开玩笑吧 You're kidding, right?
你不会真的喜欢这种三俗剧吧 You cannot really be enjoying that stupid show.
我只不过是换台时停顿了一下 I was changing channels.
天呐 你最近这么这么刻薄呢 God. Why are you so mean lately?
你遇到什么事了吗 Is something wrong with you?
有这么明显吗 Is it that obvious?
天呐 快来 跟我说说 Oh, my gosh. Come on. You can talk to me.
我学校里有个女同学 她... There's this girl at school, and...
她怀孕了 She got pregnant.
不是吧 No.
是啊 我一直试着帮她 I know. I've been trying to help her,
但由于药物作用 她听不进劝 But with all the pills she's taking, she kinda lashes out.
宝贝 你一人面对这样的事太不容易了 Oh, honey, this is too much for you to take on alone.
-她的家长呢 -他们帮不上忙 - Where are the parents? - They're no help.
她爸爸一心只顾着自己的整容生意 Dad's all consumed with his plastic surgery business,
妈妈以前是模特 正努力发展音乐事业 and her mom's an ex-model who's trying to launch a music career.
这是我刚刚看的电视剧里的剧情吧 You're describing the show I was just watching, right?
我只是想说 时不时读点书吧 I'm just saying, mix in a book every now and then.
刻薄 刻薄鬼 Mean! Mean!
试着从我的角度看看 Try to see this from my perspective.
我看不了 I can't.
我的儿子不能半途而废 I'm not raising a quitter.
相信我 我知道什么对你有好处 Trust me. I know what's best for you.
注意控制时间 舞台表演时 And watch your time. In the stage version,
绳子会被点燃 而你会被悬在钉板上 the rope's on fire, and you're suspended over a bed of nails.
我讨厌这把戏 你为什么逼我做这个 I hate this! Why are you making me do this?
化愤怒为力量 卢吉尼 Use that anger, Lukini.
将它变为打开恐惧之门的钥匙 Let it be the key that opens the vault of fear...
那里面有希望之杯 that holds the chalice of hope
杯里盛着成功的灵丹妙药 that contains the elixir of success.
短短几分钟后... In a few short minutes...
我的神啊 你成功了 Son of Alkazeel! You've done it!
我不干了 I quit.
第一天怎么样 快跟我说说 So how was your first day? Tell me everything.
你懂的 我备受喜爱 Well, you know, it was a lovefest.
孩子们 他们 你知道吧... And the kids-- they were, you know, and...
那是烤肉吗 Is that a roast?
是的 我很惊讶你居然可以闻出来 W--yes. Yes. But I'm surprised you could smell it over the
毕竟有黄胡椒浓汤 配油煎干酪面包块的混合 no-dairy yellow pepper bisque with cheesy croutons.
哇 你还能腾出时间烤肉又煲汤 Oh, wow. You had time to do a roast and soup.
-爹地好 -你好 我的天使 - Hi, daddy! - Hi, angel!
你好吗 有没有想爸爸 How are you? Did you miss daddy?
哇 洗了澡还梳好了辫子 Wow. Bathed and braided.
是啊 我来把灯光调得柔和些 Yeah. Let me just put you in a more flattering light here.
调光器 The dimmer.
你叫谁来修的 Who'd you call?
我叫了我自己 我修的 I called myself 'cause I did it.
对 买完给吉奥的礼物后我还有些时间 Yeah, I had time after picking up Gio's present,
所以就...把礼物拿来给爸爸看看 so, uh... Go show daddy what it is.
-好 -乖 - Okay. - Yeah.
听起来你这一天过得充实又高效 It sounds like you had a pretty successful day yourself.
只是有条理些罢了 Well, it's just a matter of being organized.
但我这是班门弄斧呀 But who am I telling, huh?
你每天都是这么高效 You do this sort of stuff every day.
吹一下 Oh, blow on that.
再跟我说说孩子们的事吧 So tell me more about the kids.
就和我想象的一样 Well, it was as I predicted, you know.
他们需要的是个 They just needed somebody to come in there
能让音乐恢复生机的老师 and bring music back to life.
而且 那个人就是... And, you know, that person was...
那个人就是... that person was...
不是我 It's not me!
出什么事了 What's happening?
糟糕透了 米奇尔 It was a disaster, Mitchell.
他们讨厌我 They hated me!
不只是孩子们 老师们也是 Not just the kids, the teachers.
午饭时他们都不和我一起坐 They wouldn't sit with me at lunch.
我只得自己一个人吃 I had to sit alone.
亲爱的不哭 Oh, honey.
还有我的运动衫 手工老师把橘汁洒上面了 And my sweater--the shop teacher spilled juice on it.
他说是不小心的 但我知道他是故意的 He said it was an accident, but it wasn't an accident.
-没关系的 -有关系 - It's okay - It's not okay!
我全搞砸了 I failed miserably.
你看你 你把所有的事都做的井井有条 And look at you. You did everything so perfectly.
那倒是 Well, yes.
也不是 And--and--and no.
其实...实话跟你说吧 Look, look, I... I gotta tell ya.
我一直用心观察 Uh... I've just been watching
多年来你做事情的方法 how you've done things all these years,
然后我稍加完善了一下 and I just perfected it.
-拜托 米奇尔 -克莱尔... - Oh, please, Mitchell! - Claire...
小卡 他跟你一样失败得一塌糊涂 Cam, he was every bit the failure you are.
他没按时接莉莉 她只好被保育员看管 He was late picking up Lily. She was in with the custodians.
晚饭也不是他做的 更离谱的是 The only thing he had less to do with than dinner
调光器他压根就没碰 was the dimmer.
莉莉漂亮的小辫 是他用口香糖粘的 And her hair was in braids because there was gum in it.
另外...你们为什么拥抱 And... why are we hugging?
因为我知道如果他求你帮忙 Because I know if he called you for help
一定忍受了许多讽刺和辱骂 and heard as many insults as I know he had to hear,
那么他这天过得比我还糟 then he had a worse day than me.
她好可怕 小卡 Oh, she was horrible, Cam.
-没事的 一切都会好的 -不 我知道 - You know what? It's gonna get better. - No, I know.
我们只是需要时间来适应我们的新角色 We just need some time to settle into these new roles.
你让我降低期望值真是太对了 You were right to lower my expectations.
应该降低期望值的是我 I just wish I had lowered mine.
你们不打算跟我道个谢吗 女士们 This gonna work its way around to a "Thank you," Ladies?
嘿 宝贝 Hey, honey.
惊喜吧 我到旧金山了 Surprise! I'm in San Francisco!
什么 What?
我把曼尼放朋友家了 我知道这很疯狂 I dropped Manny at a friend's and, I know it's crazy,
但我赶上了一班飞机就飞来啦 but I hopped on a plane and I'm here!
现在正往酒店去 I'm driving to the hotel.
那太棒了 That is so great.
可是宝贝 我现不在酒店里 The thing is, honey, I'm not here right now.
我正在外面吃晚饭 See, I'm, uh, I'm out at dinner.
暂时赶不回来 Probably won't be back for, um...
可能得几个小时吧 Oh, I don't know. A couple of hours.
没关系 人家等着你 It's okay. I'll wait for you there.
别傻了 多难得来一趟旧金山啊 Don't be silly. How often do you get to san francisco?
那里有很多地方可以参观 There's so much to see there.
我是说"这里" I mean, here.
吉拉德里广场 渔人码头 Ghirardelli square? Fisherman's wharf?
恶魔岛也不错 对了 去报个赛格威团吧 Alcatraz? Hey, take that segway tour.
可以饱览城市美景 That's a great way to see the city.
喝海鲜杂烩浓汤时 And when you get the chowder,
一定要用"面包碗" Make sure it one of those bread bowls.
喝完汤可以把碗吃了 You can eat the bowl.
对了 你以后都可以拿这事儿当美谈了 Yeah, it's a story you'll tell for a lifetime.
话说 待会儿 You know what? Later on...
[美国著名魔术师]
我们可以看一些兰斯·伯顿的光碟 Maybe we can watch some of your Lance Burton DVDs.
谢谢 我就是想尝试一下逃脱术 Thanks. I think I just wanna try this escape.
能帮我把手臂这儿弄紧点吗 Would you mind tightening my arms?
当然 来 Oh. Sure. Here.
我心里挺不好受的 It's just hard, you know?
他这是第一次对我的爱好不感兴趣 It's the first time he hasn't shared one of my interests.
我们父子要是从此有隔阂了可怎么办 It's scary to think that this is the start of us growing apart.
亲爱的 没准这只是暂时的 Oh, honey, it's probably just a phase.
倒是艾丽克斯最近有点儿问题 Alex is going through something right now.
我得想想办法解决她的问题 I wish I could figure that out.
-我喘不过气了 -焦虑啊 - I can't breathe. - Anxiety.
不不 我在努力挣脱枷锁衫 No, no, I'm--I'm fighting the jacket.
逃脱的关键就是要受力平衡 The key to this escape is balance.
反作用力是整个逃脱术的突破点 The whole thing is based on the idea of opposing forces.
控制两边的力量 Holding each other in check.
说得有点道理 That actually makes some sense.
有"点"道理 Some sense?
世上有两件事是我百分百确定的 There are two things I know with dead certainty--
一是如何挣脱开叠罗汉 How to shoulder roll out of a human pyramid,
二是破解"巴特勒逃脱术" and the black arts of the Butler's escape.
不 亲爱的 我们家失去平衡了 No, honey, our house is out of balance,
因为艾丽克斯失去"反向作用力"了 because Alex is missing her opposing force.
对吧 我好聪明 Mm? Yeah.
你错失了大好机会 Oh. Y-you're missing out.
有人说此魔术是场视觉盛宴 Some people describe this escape as visual poetry.
亲爱的 Honey?
完了 oh, no.
歌洛莉亚 Gloria.
你说你在西斯科 You told me that you were in Frisco,
但却在酒店被我抓了个正着 and you were here in a hotel?
我就说一点 Let me just say one thing.
别说"西斯科" 当地人不爱听 Don't say "Frisco." They hate that.
你怎么找到我的 And how the hell did you find me?
家里最近有点小噪音 The house has been a little noisy lately.
学校图书馆又像个勾搭妹子的炮点 And the school library is a pickup scene.
一个渴望安静祥和之地的孩子能去哪儿呢 So where does a kid go for some peace and quiet?
告诉我你是不是有外遇了 Tell me right now if you're having an affair,
待会儿我再找时间抽死你 and we will find some time later for me to kill you.
不是的 我只是想远离你的鼾声一晚 No. I'm just trying to have one night away from your snoring.
你来酒店开房是为了睡觉 You came to a hotel to sleep?
我精疲力尽了 我不想说出来让你难过 I'm exhausted, and I didn't want to hurt your feelings,
但你身躯庞大而且又吵 but you're huge and you're loud.
[著名脱口秀主持人 身躯肥胖臃肿]
我就好像和拉什·林博同床一样 It's like sleeping with Rush Limbaugh.
我不想说这事 是因为我觉得 And I didn't want to bring it up because I figured
你会像生曼尼的气那样 生我的气 you'd get mad at me the way you got mad at Manny.
我生气不是因为你说我打鼾 I am not mad at you because you told me that I snore.
我生气是因为你什么也没说 I am mad at you because you didn't say anything.
因为我不想被你骂 'cause I didn't want to get yelled at.
太遗憾了 Well, too bad.
你娶了我 When you're married to me,
就得准备好被骂个够 you're going to get yelled at many times.
而且你坚强到完全可以接受 And you're tough enough to take it.
我就是喜欢咱们婚姻的这点 That's what I love about our marriage.
我们可以畅所欲言 We can say whatever we want,
但说完以后 谁也不会放在心中 but the next day, we're still there.
我也喜欢这点 That's what I like about it, too.
看来我说什么你都能原谅我啊 What am I gonna say you couldn't forgive me?
也有不可原谅的 杰 There are things, Jay.
可以走了吗 You ready to go?
我在想 开了房不用 I was thinking, it's such a shame
实在是太可惜了 that this hotel room is going to go to waste.
我喜欢这事的发展方向 I like where this is headed.
给曼尼做点意面 我们明早见了 Make Manny some pasta. I'll see you tomorrow morning, okay?
嘿 爸 Hey, dad.
嘿 小老弟 Hey, buddy.
听我说 我很抱歉我... Look, I-I'm sorry if I--
别这样 不用道歉 No no no, don't apologize.
我们可以一起做很多其他事 There's still plenty of stuff we can do together.
所以如果你想退出 So if you want out,
你就退"出"吧 you are... Out!
我知道我们买了很多魔术用具 Uh, I know we bought a lot of magic stuff,
但是可以退回去一些 but we can return some of it--
巫师帽 手套 大部分的披风 Merlin's hat, the gloves, most of the capes.
魔术大师手杖呢 What about houdini's wands?
弄断了 They kinda got broken.
三支全断了吗 怎么了 All three? What happened?
我买的是碳纤维材质的 I got you carbon fiber.
在学校有些同学拿来开玩笑 Some kids were messing around with them at school.
什么意思 他们做了什么 What do you mean? What--what were they doing?
我真心不想说这事儿 I don't really want to talk about it.
这种事我也经历过 You know, I went through that,
同学们拿我的东西开玩笑 kids--kids messing with my stuff.
-真的吗 -对 高中时 - Really? - Oh, yeah. In high school,
我第一次提名参加低年级翻筋斗大赛 When I first got nominated for junior tumbling congress,
我父母要签同意书[释放] my parents had to sign a... release!
总之 我哥们儿晕乎布雷迪 Anyway, my buddy dizzy Brindizzi
看到了 抢过去 猛开我的玩笑 saw it, grabbed it, and made a lot of fun of me.
我就想着不去了 I thought about not going.
但你去了 But you did.
是啊 可爽了 Oh, yeah. Had a blast.
交了很多朋友 Made a lot of friends,
与不止一位女筋斗运动员分享奶昔 shared milkshakes with more than one female tumbler.
我不再在乎其他人想法 The minute I stopped caring what other people thought
开始做自己想做的事情那一刻 就是 and started doing what I wanted to do, is the minute
我终于感觉到"自由"的那一刻 I finally felt... Free!
小老弟 Buddy...
你自己做决定吧 You're gonna make your own choices,
无论你的决定是什么 我永远会支持你 and whatever you decide, I'll always support you.
你说这些不是因为你脱不了身 有求于我吧 You're not just saying all this 'cause you're stuck, right?
你做的任何决定都不会令我失望 Nothing you decide will ever disappoint me.
多谢了 爸 Thanks, dad.
胳膊放松 Relax your arms,
肩膀朝前 roll your shoulders forward,
低下头 bend down your head,
呼气 exhale...
然后拱背 And then arch.
还算管用 Uh... It sorta worked.
宝贝 我只是想看看你问个好 Well, honey, I just wanted to check in and say hi.
艾丽克斯 过来跟你姐打个招呼 Alex, come say hi to your sister!
我好爱你 I love you so much.
咋滴了 小姐 What's up, lady?
我的天 你怎么能说"咋滴了 小姐" Oh, my god. You did not just say, "What's up, lady?"
你什么毛病啊 What's wrong with you?
我只是问好 I was just saying hello--
那是你说过的最白痴的话 Oh, it's like the lamest thing you've ever said.
你这衣服算什么 And what is that shirt?
你是20年代的摩登女郎吗 What are you, a flapper?
我买的那家店可是你... I just bought it at that store that you--
哪家店 "永远的1921"吗 Oh, where? Forever 1921?
而且你头发是怎么回事 And what is going on with your hair?
我的头发又怎么了 What's wrong with my hair?
你干脆把自己在"驱男剂"里蘸蘸好了 Oh, you should just dip yourself in boy repellent.
闭嘴 妈 Shut up! Mom!
平衡 And balance...
恢复了 is restored.