《外星居民》前情回顾 Previously on "Resident Alien"...
这座城市简直在侮辱我的感官 This city is an assault on my senses.
这个加尔文/鲍威尔集团是什么鬼 Who the hell is Galvan/Powell Group?
你根本不知道你现在和谁打交道 You have no idea who you are dealing with.
大熊星座 Constellation Ursa Major.
这就是歌利亚的所在地 That is where we will find Goliath.
大家现在都认为佩西恩斯是个谋杀之城了 People already think Patience is a murder town.
你还想让大家觉得我们是个外星人之城吗 You want them to think it's an alien town too?
杰西普想要建新的五星级度假村 Jessup is trying to build a five-star resort.
谁说非得是杰西普呢 Who says it's gotta be Jessup?
山脊上的格雷迪山庄 That Grady property up on the ridge
早就等着被开发呢 is beggin' to be developed.
我想你是怀孕了 I think you're pregnant.
你准备好了 它就在这 When you're ready, it'll be there.
- 斯莫尔伍德医生... - 他想开除你 - Dr. Smallwood... - He's trying to fire you.
现在我们没有医生了 And now we officially have no doctor.
看来万德斯本格医生是我们的唯一人选了 Dr. Vanderspeigle is our only real candidate.
他生日快到了 He has a birthday comin' up.
我们去见的外星人已经死了 The alien we went to see was dead.
歌利亚坚持了很久 Goliath held out for as long as he could.
- 但他生下了一个蛋 - 不 - But he gave birth to an egg. - No!
现在就在哈利的包里 And now it's in Harry's bag.
你知道这个什么时候能孵化出来吗 Do you even know when it will hatch?
惊喜啊 Surprise!
外星球在哪里 So where is this alien ball,
我怎么能确定视频不是伪造的 and how do I know that video wasn't a fake?
你得相信我 You're gonna have to trust me.
上次我见你的时候 还想杀了你 Last time I saw you, I was going to have you killed.
相信你是不可能的 Seems like trusting you is moving backwards.
我想看外星球 I want to see it.
你想要什么 What do you want?
我把球给你 然后回归正常生活 I give you the ball, I get my life back...
光荣退伍 全额退休金 Honorable discharge, full pension.
不能有人... Nobody trying to...
外星居民 第二季第八集
滚出我的房子 Get out of my house!
生日快乐啊 万德斯本格医生 Happy Birthday, Dr. Vanderspeigle.
很高兴你能回到佩西恩斯 Glad to have you back in Patience.
哇 哈利 这是个惊喜派对 Wow, Harry. It's a surprise party.
没错 为了庆祝我们镇上最受人 That's right. Honoring the birthday
尊敬的居民的生日 of one of our town's most esteemed residents,
哈利·万德斯本格医生 Dr. Harry Vanderspeigle.
又进行了一周绕日运动 万医生 Here's to another trip around the Sun, Dr. V.
对了 非法入室是本的主意 By the way, the break and enter was Ben's idea.
不 并不是非法入室 是正大光明进来的 Ah, no, no. No breaking, just entering.
门没锁 The door was unlocked.
那是因为你从窗户进去后 Yeah, after you climbed through the window
打开了锁 and unlocked it.
出于对我们这位好朋友的尊重 Out of respect for our wonderful friend...
不 应该是我们的好搭档 Nay, our partner, really...
我之所以会来庆祝 不为别的 Who deserves to be celebrated for, if nothing else,
只因他的善举 his kindness.
你们都是非法入侵 都该进监狱 You are all trespassing and should be in prison.
- 他在开玩笑 - 他没有 - He's jokin'. - No he's not.
多谢你的提醒 Thanks for the heads-up.
我没被邀请 我就是饿了 I wasn't invited. I'm just hungry.
我来帮你拿这个吧 Here, let me grab this for you.
不用 我自己可以的 No! I can put that away!
不用啦 我怎么能让你自己拿行李 Ah, no way. No worrying about luggage for you.
哇 好险啊 Whoa, close call there.
好了 让我们一起来庆祝吧 All right, let's get the festivities started.
我最不喜欢别人不请自来了 I do not like having people at my house uninvited.
你来这里的时候 地球的感受也是如此 Well, now you know how Earth felt when you got here.
我会把大家都支走 Okay, I'll get rid of everyone.
把这个东西藏到楼下去 Just take that thing downstairs.
只有一半是"东西" Only half of it is "thing."
另一半是外星人 The other half is alien.
好的 Sure.
万德斯本格医生 旅途还顺利吗 Oh, Dr. Vanderspeigle, how was your trip?
我听说你去纽约参加了一个医学会议 I heard you went to a medical conference in New York.
是的 我参加了个艺术派对 Yes, I went to an art party,
还服用了违禁药物 and took illegal drugs.
我也参加过一个艺术派对 You know, I went to an art party once.
准确说那不是个艺术派对 Well, it wasn't an art party.
那是... 我想你可以称之为艺术 It was... I guess you could call that art...
你养宠物蜘蛛吗 Do you have a pet spider?
你头发里都是 Because it's in your hair.
- 什么 - 是的 - What? - Yeah.
- 天哪 - 不 不 不 - Oh. - No, no, no.
- 不是吧 - 的确有 - No. No. - Yes.
在哪儿呢 Where is it?
现在没了 It is gone now.
什么 What?
不行 Mm-mm. Nope.
你什么时候去请万医生 So when you gonna ask Dr. V
当小镇的医生啊 本 to be the town doctor, Ben?
我不知道你在说啥 I don't know what you're talking about.
行了吧 这就是你办这一场派对的原因 Come on, man. This is what this is all about.
你在献殷勤 You're wooing him. Look.
给你个忠告 在问他之前先把他灌醉 Word of advice: get him drunk before you ask him.
也许能更顺利 It'll help smooth the woo.
我只是想表达感激 I'm just showing appreciation.
这不是献殷勤 There's... there's no woo.
嘿 本 Hey, Ben.
多谢你举办了这场派对 Thanks for pulling all this together.
但是哈利身体并不是很舒服 Um, Harry's not really feeling very well,
或许我们改天晚上再过来庆祝 so maybe we could do this another night.
不行 Ah, can't.
今晚对哈利来说很特别 如果他身体不舒服 It's a special night for Harry, and if he's not feeling well,
那我们作为小镇中的一员 then by golly, we will nurse him back to health
就一起好好照顾他 together as a town.
我们会留下来的 We're stayin'.
哇哦 Woo...
- 本 真的太... - 失陪一下 - Ben, that's very... - Excuse me.
行吧 等你被外星人宝宝吃了 Okay. An alien baby kills you,
可别赖我 it's not my fault.
我搞不懂人类为什么要庆生 I do not understand why humans celebrate their births.
每个活着的人都出生了 Everyone who is alive has been born.
这没什么特别的 It is not special.
生日派对就像个参与奖 A birthday party is just a participation trophy.
这是我奶奶的魔鬼蛋秘方 It's my grandmother's secret deviled egg recipe.
我十岁的时候潜入她的书房 成功偷学到了 I snuck into her desk and stole it when I was ten.
之后她一直都很恨我 She's hated me ever since.
哇 太疯狂了 Mmm. Well, these are insane.
被奶奶记恨的确很可怕 但这真的值得 I mean, it's horrible to lose your grandmother, but worth it.
去年圣诞节的时候她还说希望自己赶快死 Last Christmas, she said she hopes she dies soon
变成鬼缠着我 带走我的灵魂 so she can haunt me and steal my soul.
她一直怀恨在心 She holds a grudge.
我就不吃了 我不是很喜欢带蛋黄的食物 Mm, not for me. I'm not a fan of yolk mixtures
也不想让灵魂被愤怒的鬼给偷走 or having my soul taken by an angry ghost.
来一个尝尝 Just try one.
真的不行 I would, but I said no.
♪我知道我很快就会回来♪ Know that I'll be coming right back
♪追寻明日的梦想♪ Tomorrow's dream
行 我来一个吧 Fine, yeah. I'll, uh, have a bite.
天哪 Oh, my God. Mmm.
舌尖上仿佛有座精致的农场 It's a delicate farm in my mouth.
不行 No.
- 你怀疑过不好吃 - 我没怀疑过 - You doubted them. - I didn't doubt it.
你不配再吃一个 You don't deserve a second one.
- 不 我配 - 不知为啥 - No, I do. - The second one
第二个更加好吃 is even better somehow.
我好像能感受到农夫的妻子叫她的家人 It's like I can taste the farmer's wife
来吃晚饭的味道 就像... calling her family in for supper, like...
"来了 妈妈" "Comin', Mama."
"我来吃饭了" "I'm comin'."
我也想尝尝农场晚餐 But I wanna taste farm supper...
- 你怎么处理的 - 放到地窖里了 - What did you do with it? - It is in the bunker.
它很安全 It is safe.
真庆幸地窖里的外星人安全了 Glad the alien in the cellar is safe.
哈利 你不不怕它在那里破壳而出吗 Harry, what if it hatches down there?
外星人宝宝通常很喜欢吃 Mm, alien babies have a big appetite
- 高热量的垃圾食品 - 啥 - for high-calorie junky food. - Uh-huh.
没有什么比人类更垃圾的了 There's nothing more junky than a human.
我们的处境很危险 We are in danger.
那我们得赶快让大家离开 We have to get everyone out of here.
快装病 Make yourself look sick.
演得不错 Oh, that's good.
对 很好 Yes. Good.
我还啥都没做呢 I have not done anything yet.
哦 Oh.
不好意思 Sorry.
但演的真不错 It's good, though.
他来了 Oh, there he is!
♪因为他是个快乐的好伙伴♪ For he's a jolly good fellow
♪没人能否认♪ Which nobody can deny
好吧 All right.
你们真觉得我是个好伙伴吗 You think I am a good fellow?
还很快乐 And jolly.
还病了 生病了 And so sick... sick.
是因为孤单病了吧 Sick... of being alone, maybe.
今天是你的生日 It's your birthday.
于你而言很特殊 It is your special day.
这都是为你准备的 All this is for you.
还有蛋糕呢 Plus, cake.
杰伊应该会拿过来 If, uh, Jay ever shows up with it.
能换成派吗 Can it be pie?
- 别 - 换成派吧 - No. - Pie it is.
我感觉好多了 你们都呆在这里吧 I feel better! You can stay.
你确定吗 医生 你脸色还是有些苍白 You sure, Doc? You still look kind of pale.
荷兰人天生如此 It is my Dutch skin.
大家都听到了吗 我们的喜悦治愈了他 You hear that everyone? Our good cheer has cured him.
我去给你准备派 I'm gonna get that pie for you.
太好了 我准备的鸡蛋足够我们 Great. I have enough eggs to last
吃一晚上了 但需要用冰块保鲜 all night, but we may need more ice,
不保持低温的话 很快就会变质了 because if they don't stay chilled, they go south fast.
我来帮你 副警长 你的冰柜里 I got you, Deputy. You got ice down
应该有冰块吧 in that meat freezer of yours, right?
别过去 Do not go down there.
有块地板裂了 万一踩上去了 The floor's cracked, and if you step on it,
一不小心摔了 你妈妈会很难过的 拿着 you'll break your mama's back. Here.
他刚刚说我妈妈什么了 What'd he say about my mama?
今天大家是为了庆祝 Today is all about celebrating
被我杀死并抛尸冰湖的 the birth of a man I murdered
那个男人的生日 and threw in the frozen lake.
冰的确很应景 Ice seems appropriate.
硫磺 Sulfur.
在吗 Hello?
居然是苏打水 Wow, soda.
你一会儿是要去操作重型机械吗 You handling heavy machinery later?
对了 你之前出城了 还没和你说呢 Right, you were out of town. We haven't talked.
我戒酒了 I stopped drinking.
真的吗 Really?
- 什么时候开始的 - 一点 - Since when? - 1:00.
- 昨晚一点 - 今天下午一点 - Last night? - This afternoon.
总得从哪开始 You gotta start somewhere.
健康饮食 You know, been eating healthy...
保持身材 getting back in shape.
我甚至又去健身房了 I even started going to the gym again.
我喜欢 I love that.
感觉很不错 Feels pretty good.
我还等着今晚的邀请呢 Hey, still waiting on a invite to come here tonight.
这年头都不发邮件了吗 Email not a thing anymore?
张嘴 Open wide.
- 嘿 亲爱的 - 嘿 - Hey hun. - Hey.
你玩得开心嘛 You having fun?
挺好的 会有人处理一下 Yeah. Are they gonna do
这股硫磺的味道嘛 anything about that sulfur smell?
我要吐了 I'm gonna barf.
我什么都没闻到 I don't smell anything.
还记得你当初怀孕的时候 Hey remember when you were pregnant,
你嗅觉超灵敏像超能力一样 and you had that sense of smell like a superhero?
希望你没怀孕 Hope you're not pregnant.
你能想象嘛 Could you imagine?
是啊 Yeah, right?
我去拿点 I'm gonna get
甜黄瓜 你要点什么嘛 some sweet gherkins. You want anything?
不用 Sure don't.
出问题了 This is a problem.
即使刚出生 外星人宝宝也是很强壮敏捷的 Even at birth, my alien kind is very strong and agile.
那东西现在可能出现在任何地方 That thing could be anywhere by now.
如果是人类宝宝 那就简单多了 If it were a fully human baby, it would be much easier.
人类幼崽是唯一一种 Human infants are the only mammal whose main attribute
只会摔跤的哺乳动物 is helplessly flopping.
需要帮忙拿冰块吗 医生 Need some help with that ice down there, Doc?
不要 No.
我很擅长搬冰 I am good at ice-carrying.
你确定 我可以下去帮忙 You sure? I'll come down and help.
不不 No, no!
我想自己拿 I want to carry it myself.
冰放在我的乳头上很舒服 Ice feels good on my nipples.
写了 医生 你闻着好像硫磺啊 Thanks, Doc. Damn, you smell like sulfur.
你刚是在外面趴体来着吗 What, you have an outhouse party down there?
不是 No.
没有硫磺 It is not sulfur.
你疯了吗 What are you, crazy?
是副警长的鸡蛋 臭臭的 It is the deputy's eggs. They are stinky.
确实 Well, that makes sense.
他们很好吃但是好臭 Yeah, those things are delicious but deadly.
吃两个就得停 不然就像在吃屁枪 You gotta stop at two, or it's like eating a butt gun.
我才不会用屁做的枪 I would not fire a gun made out of butts.
美乃滋是自制的 我手工打发了蛋黄 The mayonnaise is homemade, and I mix the yolks by hand.
我不像大部人一样 And I don't use
用菜籽油 canola oil like most people.
秘诀是用橄榄油 The key is olive oil.
可以激发出鸡蛋的香味 It really brings out the eggy flavor.
好吃 Yum.
- 我先失陪以下 - 好的 - Just... excuse me. - Okay.
- 马上 - 好的 - Just one second. - Okay.
我说真的 如果你穿着护士服 I'm serious. If you're wearing nurse scrubs
并且在奔跑 and you're running, stores will pretty much
商家基本会不收你钱 let you take anything for free.
可不 当然 Yeah. Of course.
不 是任何东西都能拿走 No, sorry, anything.
我标记了所有的军队据点 Okay, so I marked all the military installations
这些地方都有可能有外星球 where they could be holding the alien ball.
我圈出来了在地下的 没人知道的地方 I circled the underground ones nobody knows about.
本为万医生办了个惊喜生日派对 Ben's throwing a surprise birthday party for Dr. V.,
但他这么做就是为了再一次 but he's just doing that to trick him
把他拐去当镇医 into being town doctor again.
这是个很大的秘密 It's this big secret.
是 我告诉所有人了 Yeah. I told everyone.
镇医 Town doctor?
伊森医生怎么了 What happened to Dr. Ethan?
黑衣人来了以后他就离开小镇了 He left town the night the Men in Black were here.
是你告诉黑衣人 You mean the night you told the Men in Black
伊森医生就是外星人的那晚吗 Dr. Ethan was the alien?
就是那天晚上 Yeah, that night.
我猜伊森医生就是不喜欢这里吧 Guess Dr. Ethan just didn't like it here.
- 你的脑子在你的屁股里吗 - 我希望不是 - Is your brain in your butt? - I hope not.
你没意识到发生了什么吗 Don't you realize what happened?
黑衣人带走了伊森医生 The Men in Black took Dr. Ethan.
一旦他们发现他就是人类 As soon as they figure out he's human,
他们会知道外星人还在佩西恩斯 they'll know the alien is still in Patience
然后立马回来找他 and come back looking for him.
我们必须立马去那个派对警告阿斯塔 We have to go to that party and warn Asta.
怎么去 我们有看护哎 How? We have a babysitter.
我们让她睡觉 We'll get her to fall asleep.
我知道怎么做 I know what to do.
就像上次我阿扎德姑妈上次过来的时候那样 Same way my Aunt Azadeh conks out when she visits.
- 安眠药 - 不是 - Sleeping pills? - No...
大自然催眠视频 calm-voiced nature videos.
这些腌黄瓜你打算怎么办 What you gonna do with all them pickles?
他们不是腌黄瓜 Those are not pickles.
他们是甜黄瓜 Those are sweet gherkins,
或者叫青瓜仔 or cornichons.
你刚刚是在纠正我怎么说腌黄瓜吗 Did you just correct me on how to say a pickle?
没有 我就是说说 No. I'm just sayin'.
我要喝点潘趣酒 I'm gonna get some punch.
- 潘趣酒怎么样 - 它掉了 - Hey, how's the punch? - It fell.
什么意思 What?
什么 What?
什么什么 What?
啥 What?
哦不 Oh, no.
我没 I didn't...
真漂亮啊 It's pretty?
真不错 Yeah, it's amazing.
你以前和哈利约会的时候 I used to spend a lot of time here
我经常在这呆很久 when you were dating Harry.
我可没说是约会 Oh, yeah. I wouldn't call it dating.
就是顺便溜一圈 It was really more of a drive-by.
有什么好消息吗 So any exciting news?
我还没测 No, I haven't taken the test yet.
如果我测了 是阳性 If I take the test and it's positive,
那我就怀孕了 then I'm pregnant.
但不是这样的啊 Yeah, that's not how it works.
我刚刚和哈利聊到纽约 You know, I was just talking to Harry about New York.
我的脑子里只有住在那里 All I could think about was how exciting it would be
得有多爽啊 你懂吗 to live there, you know?
艺术展 剧院 所有的一切 The art shows, the theatre, all of it.
为什么我的生活不能是这样 Why can't that be my life?
不知道 为什么不能呢 I don't know. Why can't it?
因为我被困在这里 Because I'm stuck here,
像野犬一样生孩子 pushing out babies like a stray dog.
那种有好多乳头的吗 The ones with all the nipples?
- 好多乳头 - 超大 超大的乳头 - So many nipples. - Huge, huge nipples.
我收养过一只 翻过来 乳头 You adopt one, it turns over. Nipple.
来吧 Come on.
我们去验孕吧 Let's go pee on a stick.
屏住呼吸 Hold your breath.
丽芙刚刚拿出来一盘新蛋 Liv just brought out a new tray of eggs.
公麋鹿的鹿角有多大 The size of the bull elk's antlers
取决于它能晒到多少阳光 depends on how much sunlight the elk gets.
这只麋鹿正沐浴在阳光下 Here, this elk basks in the warm rays of the midday sun.
正常体型的雄性鹿角每天可以长二点五厘米 A full-sized male's antlers can grow up to an inch per day
在夏天短短的几个月里 during the summer months.
他们通常在八月中旬完全长大 They're typically fully grown by mid-August.
如果他可以 If he is able to...
嘿 Hey!
你们去哪 Where are you going?
- 骑车 - 倒垃圾 - Bike ride? - Taking out the garbage!
在你们父母回来之前回来 Just come home before your parents get back.
不许嗑药 No drugs!
- 她可真是个不合格的看护 - 是啊 - She's a horrible babysitter. - Yeah.
什么鬼 What the hell?
- 哈利 - 只有我 - Harry? - No, just me.
- 我在这尿尿 - 抱歉 - Just me in here peein'. - Sorry.
我拿不住验孕棒 我的手抖得很厉害 God, I can't hold the stick. My hand's shaking too much.
给我 我来拿 我来拿 Okay, give it to me. I'll hold it. I'll hold it.
- 你确定吗 - 确定 - You sure? - Yeah.
到位了 尿吧 Okay, it's in position. Go.
你尿到我手上了 And you just pissed on my hand.
你在这啊 你在干嘛 There you are. What are you doing?
我在吃我的生日糖果 I am enjoying my birthday candy.
你去看蛋了吗 Have you checked on the egg?
因为如果那个蛋孵化了 'Cause if there's any chance that it will hatch,
我们必须得让所有人离开这个派对 we have to get everyone out of this party right now.
派对不能结束 派要来了 The party cannot end. There is pie coming.
别担心 宝宝不会出来的 Do not worry. The baby will not hatch.
它绝对还在蛋壳里 It is definitely still inside of its shell.
不在其他地方 Nowhere else!
但是这还是个派对 Okay. It's still a party, though,
所以你不能就躲在卧室里 so you can't just hide in the bedroom,
大家会起疑的 or people will be suspicious.
出去和人聊聊 Come talk to someone,
不要做奇奇怪怪的事情 and don't be weird.
行吧 And here we go.
我去和丹聊天因为他有食物 I will talk to Dan because he has food.
这不奇怪 And that is not weird.
嗨 丹 Hi, Dan.
这是我付给这顿饭的钱 Here is some money for my meal,
我拿着这些炸物去桌子吃 and I'll also take a side of fries at the table.
抱歉 Really sorry about that.
别担心 Don't worry.
我之前也被尿过 I've been peed on before.
我也是 I have too.
我还挺喜欢的 I kind of like it.
我是说我小时候捡的青蛙 I was talking about a frog I picked up when I was a kid.
青蛙啊 Yeah, frogs.
我也是 Me too.
时间到了 Time's up.
操 Shit.
恭喜 Congratulations.
你会告诉本这个好消息吗 You gonna tell Ben the good news?
除非我确定这是个好消息 Not until I'm convinced it's good news.
为什么 如果你觉得很有负担 Why? If you get overwhelmed,
回想一下生活很简单的时候 just think back on a time when life was simple,
你就只是一个尿在 and you were just a woman
另一个女人身上的女人 pissin' on another woman.
你可以的 霍桑 You got this, Hawthorne.
你不会相信 You're not gonna believe it.
几个月以前 尤金娜·普朗克特 Eugena Plunkett came in, saying she saw a UFO
说她在佩西恩斯看见了一架不明飞行物 a couple of months ago in Patience.
- 你能想象吗 - 那有点离谱 - Can you imagine? - That seems... crazy.
还记得我们小时候去露营的时候 Remember that camping trip when we were kids,
本看到了什么 他跑过来 然后你们都 like when Ben saw something, and he ran, and everyone
跟着他去凑热闹 而我留在篝火旁边 followed him, and I stayed back by the fire?
没错 我记得 Yeah, I think so.
但是他其实什么也没看到吧 But he didn't see anything, right?
- 对 - 对 - No. - No.
没错 Yeah. No.
但是我看到了 But I did.
真的吗 Really?
看到什么了 What?
一架飞碟 "A UFO."
一架真正的飞碟 "A real-life UFO."
你会愿意相信吗 Don't you wanna believe...
我们并不孤单 that we're not alone,
地球上还有比我们更高级的生物存在 like, that there's something bigger than us out there?
当然 但是肯定不会是在佩西恩斯 Sure. Um, but not in Patience.
毕竟 这里的披萨店都是最近才开的 I mean, we just barely got a pizza place.
外星人肯定不会来这儿 I am sure there are not aliens here.
可能你说的对 You're probably right.
但是有时想想这些事情也挺有意思 It's just fun to think about sometimes.
- 你好 - 你好 - Hello. - Hello.
杰伊来了 糟糕 Jay's here. Okay.
假装你在和我说话 好吗 Pretend like you're talking to me, would you?
我本来就在和你说话 I am talking to you.
对哦 Right. Oh God.
只是 她在的时候我会很紧张 I'm so... I just get so nervous when she's around.
我在和她保持距离 给她空间 I mean, I've been giving her space, you know?
但是持续的时间好像长过头了 But I'm... it just feels like it's been forever,
两天之后就是她的十八岁生日 and her 18th birthday is in two days.
- 我语速很快吗 - 嗯哼 - Am I talking fast? - Mm-hmm.
好吧 她现在还能开车了 Talking fast. She's driving now.
没错 她是我们最好的客户 Yeah, she's our best customer.
我们给过她六张罚单 We've given her, like, six tickets.
我很抱歉 Oh. I'm so sorry.
深呼吸 Mm-mm. Breathe.
好的 Okay.
- 好 - 她过来了 - Yeah. - She's coming.
- 她正往这边来 - 你注意别晕过去 - She's on her way. - Don't pass out.
- 嗨 - 嘿 最近怎么样 - Hi. - Hey, how are you?
你呢 How are you?
我很好 I'm good.
你知道的 我的生日快到了 Um, so my birthday's coming up, which you know.
对没错 我生的 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was there.
所以 我想问 我生日那天你想和我一起 Yeah, so... look, I was wondering if you might want
做点什么吗 to do something that day.
就我们两个 Just, um... Just you and me.
- 真的吗 - 当然 - Really? - Yeah, you know...
就是一起吃顿午饭什么的 just, like, lunch or something.
没什么大不了的 就是一起出去玩玩 It's no big deal. Just hang out.
呃 Uh...
我非常愿意 I would love that.
行 太棒了 Okay. Um, great.
那下午一点你来餐厅接我 Pick me up at the diner at 1:00?
或许我们可以去试试那家新开的墨西哥餐厅 Maybe we can check out that new Mexican place?
我都等不及了 I can't wait.
很好 那我要去那边了 Okay. Um, I'm gonna go...
去胡吃海塞一顿 I'm gonna go eat as much food as I can
免得一会儿霍桑先生把我赶出去 before Mr. Hawthorne kicks me out.
当然可以 Sure. Cool.
你还好吗 Hey, are you okay?
好的不能再好 Yeah, I'm great.
我就是来上个厕所 I just need to pee.
让我进去 我知道你心情不太好 Let me in. I know you're upset.
我很好 就是打了个喷嚏 I'm fine. Just... sneezed.
你有看见哈利吗 Um, have you seen Harry?
不用这么难为情 Don't be too self-conscious.
我也吃了一大堆鸡蛋 I had a bunch of them eggs too.
你排我后面吧 我会有点久 You get in line. I'ma be a while.
也别站在门边等 好吗 Don't stand by the door neither, a'ight?
你自己说的不用难为情 You're the one that said not to be self-conscious...
给我走开点 Get away from the damn door!
- 我还能看见你的脚 - 好吧 - I still see your feet! - All right.
噢 Ow.
在找东西吗 Looking for something?
我只是想热馅饼 I wanted to heat up pie.
蛋已经孵化了 你一清二楚 The baby hatched, and you knew it!
什么 这可是个大新闻 What? This is news to me.
你怎么没早点告诉我 How did you not tell me this sooner?
别装了 我在厕所看见它了 Stop it. I saw it in the bathroom!
它还长了牙齿 And it has teeth!
什么样的宝宝刚出生就长牙 What kind of baby has teeth?
外星宝宝 Oh, an alien baby.
它们擅长撕扯物体 和人类 They're very good at ripping things... or people.
各位 我们必须得离开这栋房子 Everyone! We have to leave the house!
不用 No. No, no.
我看到它去外面了 I saw it run outside.
各位 我们得留在房子里 Everyone, we need to stay inside the house!
- 哈利 - 我们得把大家集中在一起 - Harry... - We should keep everyone together.
外面已经不安全了 Outside is not safe.
所有在华盛顿工作过的警察都在场 Now, any cop that's ever been a cop in D.C.
明白吗 也就是说 is there, right? Which is just...
退休警察就算在酒吧他也还是警察 That's just the way it is at Kelly's when a cop retires.
接下来发生了什么呢 So the next thing you know,
我们听到所有人都在尖叫 we hear all these people screaming, right?
我们不知道发生了什么 We don't know what's going on.
是有人在打架斗殴吗 Did a fight break out, you know?
谁知道呢 我就四处查看 Who knows? And I look,
然后一只山羊冲出人群跑了出来 and parting the sea of bodies is a goat.
- 什么 - 杰西偷偷带了一只山羊进酒吧 - What? - Jesse had snuck a goat
还放它到处乱跑 into the bar and just let it loose.
看吧 杰西干得出这种事 See, now that was Jesse!
看到你笑真好 Good to see you laughin'.
老爸 能和我聊会儿吗 Hey Dad, can I talk to you for a second?
好啊 Okay.
还有一次 Oh, and this other time...
外星宝宝孵化出来了 The alien baby hatched.
它逃跑了 It's loose!
这算是坏事吗 Is that a bad thing?
反正不是好事 It's not a good thing.
把大家聚在一起 别让任何人出去 好吗 Keep everyone together, and don't let anyone outside, okay?
哈利担心坏了 Harry's really worried.
- 我可一点没看出来 - 什么 - He doesn't look worried. - Huh?
我不喜欢这个礼物 I do not like this gift.
这不是去年圣诞节我送给你的吗 Didn't I, uh, give you that last Christmas?
如果有人提前邀请我的话 Well, maybe if someone had invited me,
我就有时间去买礼物了 I'd have time to shop.
再说 那玩意儿闻起来像大便 Plus, it smells like doo-doo, baby.
哈利 我能问你一下派的事吗 Harry, can I ask you a quick question about the pie?
市长就送这么便宜的东西 The mayor gives cheap gifts.
这还是他很用心做的呢 Oh, actually he worked pretty hard on that.
才不便宜 这可是蜂蜡材质的 Not cheap. Uh, it happens to be beeswax,
- 自然界的黄金 - 黄金不就是自然界的吗 - nature's gold. - Isn't gold nature's gold?
对本来说不是 Not to Ben.
如果它在外面呢 What if it's outside?
可能我们留在房子里比较好 Then maybe we should stay here.
我们要在这里过夜的话 And if we're going to stay here,
就要开礼物 we should open presents.
- 阿斯塔 阿斯塔 - 没错 不要出去 - Asta! Asta! - Yeah, do not go outside.
阿斯塔 Asta!
我们得留在房子里 不能出去 We should stay inside while we can't go outside.
- 看这里 - 看这里 - Come on! - Come on!
- 我们去另一边的窗户 - 好 - Let's go to the other window. - Yeah.
酷 是浣熊 Cool, a raccoon!
看看这个可爱的小 Aw, look at the cute little...
什么鬼 What the?
你知道这意味着什么吗 Do you know what this means?
浣熊的骨头不好吃 Raccoon bones don't taste good?
哈利在孵化外星宝宝 Harry is breeding alien babies.
我得让大家在这里待多久 How long do I have to keep everybody here for?
我是说 外面现在安全吗 I mean, is it safe outside?
那个外星人类是不是已经离开了 Did the "humalien" thing run away?
我没法预测它的行动 I do not know what the alien will do.
它是混血 It is a hybrid.
它饿的时候 外星的部分会让它想回来 The alien part of it will want to come back when it is hungry.
它知道这里有食物 It will know there is food here.
你是指我们吗 You mean us, right?
当然不是 No, of course not.
它会想吃它出生后留下的蛋壳 It will want to eat the egg sack that it was born in.
好吧 Okay.
然后才是我们 Then us.
- 我的天 - 我会下楼去 - Jesus. - I'll go downstairs
找到蛋壳 然后放点吃的在蛋壳上 and look for it, and maybe snack on the sack.
- 恶 - 我需要点美味的东西 - Ew. - I need something savory.
还有 它毕竟有可能吃人 You know, about it maybe eating us thing...
你那些枪里有子弹吗 you got bullets for those guns?
枪全都上膛了 They're all loaded.
我内心其实是个好战分子 The real me was redneck-y.
嘿 丹 Hey Dan. Uh...
我把杰西的一部分骨灰带在身边 I've been carrying around some of Jesse's ashes with me
有一阵子了 for a while now, right?
我在想可能是时候随他去了 I'm thinkin' maybe it's time to let him go.
你知道的 撒了它们 You know, spread his ashes.
好主意 I love that idea.
少了这些负担你也会开心点 I think you'll be happier not carrying that weight around.
没错 我们以前经常 Yeah. Well, we used to fish
在一起钓鱼 所以我想 together a lot. So I thought about
可以撒在这里的湖上 doing it here, on the lake.
我们可以为他举行一个小的纪念仪式 You know, maybe we have a little memorial for him.
我希望你也能一起来 I'd love for you to be a part of it.
我很荣幸 随时可以 I'd be honored. Anytime.
很好 那我们走吧 Great! All right, let's go.
现在不行 Uh, not now.
为什么 Why not?
风太大 Too windy.
不是撒骨灰的好天气 Not good ash-spreading weather.
你真是个专家 Well, you the expert, right?
我要去搞点吃的 I'ma get me some food.
嘿 万医生 Hey! Dr. V!
我就是想来打个招呼 Just, uh, thought I'd say hi.
哇哦 好棒的工作间 Wow, great work space.
你在这下面建了鸟屋 You, uh, you build birdhouses down here?
你是个工匠 You, uh, you're a tinkerer?
喜欢鼓捣小东西 You like to tinker?
对 Yes.
温暖的尿液离开我的身体时 Sometimes it makes me shiver
有时会让我战栗不已 because of the warm urine leaving my body.
那真是 Oh no, that's, uh...
不管了 Anyway, hey, um,
我是想和你说件事 wanted to talk to you about something.
很不幸 斯莫伍德医生决定要退休了 Unfortunately, Dr. Smallwood has decided to retire,
所以我们又一次 and we have found ourselves, once again,
我们缺一个镇医 without a town doctor.
对 我能从你脸上 And, yes, I can see
看出你有顾虑 by the concern on your face
你也知道这件事让我的处境 that you understand what a difficult position
有多么艰难 this puts me in.
但你知道什么让这变好了吗 But you know what's even better?
是你 你回来 Is you... returning
做我们的镇医 你觉得呢 as our town doctor. What do you think?
我会考虑一下 I will consider it!
什么鬼东西 Oh! What the heck was that?
某只地球上的动物 It was an Earth animal.
- 一只有狂犬病的浣熊 - 嗯嗯 - It's a sick raccoon. - Mm-hmm.
也许我们该出去 We should probably go away.
别靠近它 Don't get close to it.
是 别说了 Yep. Say no more.
- 证明我该走了 - 嗯 - That's my cue. - Mm.
我去提醒一下大家 Uh, I'll go warn the others.
喂 Hello?
你好 Oh, hi.
真的吗 太好了 Really? That's amazing.
如果那些浣熊真的得了狂犬病 You know, if those raccoons do have rabies,
我们就得抓住他们 送到别的地方去 we should find them and take them somewhere.
操 我可不想和狂犬病打交道 Shit, I ain't messin' with no damn rabies.
你知道所有患狂犬病的人都疯了 You know 100% of people who have rabies go insane,
但只有20%的疯子有狂犬病吗 but only 20% of insane people have rabies?
这是个能在网上查到的事实 That's a Internet fact.
嗯 Mmm.
这酒挺不错 This stuff's pretty good.
比我记的要辣些 It's spicier than I remember.
挺烈 It's tangy.
你明白吗 You know?
- 我试试 - 是 - I'll have some of that. - Yeah.
好像去纽约没戏了 Well, looks like New York's out of the picture.
什么 为什么 What? Why?
本刚刚接到了一个公司的电话 Ben just got a call from some company
他们想在这建个度假胜地 that wants to put a resort here.
意味着他还要干镇长干几十年 Says he's gonna be mayor for decades.
没人要在这建度假胜地 Nobody's putting a resort here.
你在说什么 What are you talking about?
我不知道啊 他说他拍了 I don't know. He says he took pictures
一些格雷迪山庄的照片 就吸引到人了 of the Grady land to sell them on the idea,
现在有人想投资 and now they want to do it.
什么 他说 What? He said he was using
这些照片只会被用在乡镇的网站上 those pictures for the town website.
啥 What?
离开一下 Excuse me.
嘿 你怎么还在这 Hey, didn't realize you were still here.
是 就是想找点东西吃 Yeah, just thought I'd grab something to eat.
一个小时前你也这么说 That was like an hour ago.
那我猜我吃了一个小时了 I guess I've been eating for an hour.
哈 Huh.
不晓得我雇了个笨蛋 Didn't realize I hired Jughead
来送蛋糕 to deliver the cake.
嘿 你们两说什么呢 Hey, what are you two talking about?
我刚刚跟达茜聊了一下 Oh, I was just catching up with D'arcy
你为度假胜地拍的那些照片 about the pictures that you took for the resort.
你知道 就是那些你骗我说 You know, the ones that you lied to me about,
是为了乡镇网站拍的照片 that you said were for the "town website."
我确实也打算把那些照片用在网站上 Well, I plan on using those pictures for the town website
所以 不算撒谎 as well, so... not a lie.
嘿 我应该再点点吃的吗 Hey, uh, should I order more food?
因为杰伊正像个剪草机一样收割它们 'Cause Jay is going through it like a lawnmower.
不 你完全在对我撒谎 Nope, you totally lied to me.
我是说 天呐 I mean, Jesus.
我们花了一整天的时间攀岩 坐四轮车 We spent the whole day rock climbing, ATVing,
就是为了让你带来一个度假胜地 what, so you could just bring in a resort
毁掉整个镇子 and destroy the town?
你去攀岩了 Uh, you went rock climbing?
一点点 小岩石 A little bit... small rock.
所以我从我妈家回来 问你 So when I got home from my mom's, and I said, you know,
"你干了什么" 你说 "没什么" "What have you been doing?"and you said, "Nothing,"
和达茜攀岩是"没什么" was "nothing" rock climbing with D'arcy?
你懂的 我是说 Uh... you know, I mean,
没什么不是个含义很多的表达吗 isn't "nothing" kind of like a catchall expression?
它可以表示很多不同的意思 I mean, it really could mean lots of different things.
不是 它的意思就是什么也没做 No. It means nothing.
你和达茜一起出去 这不是没什么 You know, what you and D'arcy did, it wasn't nothing.
这是有什么 出于某些理由 It was something, and for some reason,
你没告诉我这件事 you just didn't tell me about it.
我只是觉得没什么要紧的 I just didn't think it was a big deal.
完蛋 瞧 Oh shit. Uh, look.
我不想掺和进来 I hate to insert myself here,
但是看上去本需要点帮助 but it looks like Ben could use a little help,
只需要知道是达茜亲了本 so just know D'arcy kissed Ben,
而不是本亲了达茜 not the other way around.
他完全是个无辜的受害者 He's a completely innocent bystander.
你亲了本 You kissed Ben?
真是有趣的发展 你们两个亲了 What a fun development. You two kissed...
- 对方 - 我早告诉你跟她讲 - each other! - I told you to tell her
这个吻 about the kiss.
这事怪我 You know, this is on me.
我喝醉了 状态很糟糕 I was drunk and in a really horrible place.
我错了 我不应该那么做 I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done it.
- 这不是本的错 - 说得对 - It's not Ben's fault. - Well put.
好 如果不是你的错 Well, if it wasn't your fault,
你为什么不告诉我 then why wouldn't you just tell me about it?
还有 你为什么 I mean, then again, why would you?
我刚刚才听你说要在镇上 'Cause I'm only just now hearing about you putting
建一个愚蠢的度假胜地 a stupid resort in town.
什么度假胜地 What resort?
你不能在佩西恩斯建一个度假胜地 You can't put a resort in Patience.
看 我没跟任何人说 See? I didn't tell anybody.
这就是你说的本想建的那个度假胜地 Is this the resort you were talking about that Ben wanted?
对 我觉得是个坏主意 Yeah. I think it's a bad idea.
我妈也这么觉得 So does my mom.
我可能告诉了迈克 以为他可以保守秘密 I might've told Mike, thought he could keep a secret.
我不能对每天早上都帮我 You can't keep secrets from somebody
买熊爪杏仁饼的人保守秘密 who buys your bear claws every morning.
只要两个熊爪杏仁饼 就能打听那个吻 It took two bear claws to find out about the kiss.
为什么每个人都在听 Why is everyone listening to this?
因为你们在公开吵架 我们都有耳朵 'Cause you're having a public fight, and we have ears.
我们没在吵架 I'm not having a fight.
我在向我太太解释 I am explaining to my wife
为什么我没告诉她我和达茜出去过 why I didn't tell her about hanging out with D'arcy
在几晚前 a couple nights ago.
所以你们还是晚上出去的 So you hung out at night too?
好了 现在是在吵架了 Okay, now it's a fight.
我没在吵 I'm not fighting.
我不介意他是不是和达茜出去过 I don't care if he hangs out with D'arcy.
他们是朋友 They're friends. I... I...
我只是不懂你为什么 I just don't know why you wouldn't
不告诉我 just tell me about this.
我们从格雷迪山庄回来 达茜来了我们家 After we left the Grady land, D'arcy came back to the house.
她找到了她之前藏在马克斯衣柜里的大麻 She found some weed that she had hid in Max's closet,
我们一起抽了 and we smoked it.
等等 你在我儿子的壁橱里藏大麻 Wait, you hid pot in my son's closet?
对 但是我是在我高中的时候藏的 Yeah, but I hid it back in high school
当时我还在和你老公上床 when I was bangin' your husband.
嗬 嗬 嗬 Ho, ho, ho...
是时候该说个冷笑话了 Thought it was time for a hard joke.
- 不合适 - 对 - No. - No.
瞧 这很荒谬 Look, this is ridiculous.
什么也没发生 她睡着了 Nothing happened. She fell asleep.
我把她抱到马克斯的床上 故事结束 I tucked her into Max's bed. End of story.
等下 你过夜了 Wait, you slept over?
嗬 嗬 好像故事未完待续啊 Ho, ho, it appears the story has a few more chapters.
等等 你抽了放了十五年的大麻 Wait, you smoked 15-year-old weed?
是 抽起来不怎么样 I did. It was not good.
- 本 - 对 达茜在马克斯的床上过夜了 - Ben... - Yes, D'arcy slept over
我现在告诉你 in Max's bed, and I am telling you now
因为我没什么好藏着掖着的 because I have nothing to hide.
所以第二天早上我回来的时候 你在哪 So where were you when I came home the next morning?
本告诉我藏起来 我从窗户溜出去了 Ben told me to hide. I snuck out the window.
我只是做了个手势 I made a gesture.
你误以为成是让你藏起来 You took it to mean hide.
我还偷了你孩子一个棒棒糖 I also stole one of your kid's candy bars.
- 对不起 - 我不敢相信 - I'm sorry. - I can't believe this.
你当时藏在我家里 You were hiding in my house?
我们之后还出去逛 We hung out after that.
你就不能把这全告诉我吗 You couldn't just tell me all of this?
全部都是假的 This whole thing was fake.
我真的以为你是我的朋友 I really thought you were my friend.
不 我是你的朋友 No, I am your friend.
她为亲了本道过歉了 She apologized for kissing Ben.
我不在乎那个 好吗 I don't care about that, okay?
就是一个愚蠢的吻 谁在乎 It's a stupid kiss. Who cares?
达茜喝醉了 很难过 有什么好意外的 D'arcy was drunk and sad. Big surprise.
如果你没有 You know, if you didn't freak out so hard
因为你老公在墙上挂了个标语就抓狂 about your husband hanging a sign on the wall,
说不定他就会跟你讲更多屁话 maybe he'd tell you more shit.
哦 哦 好了 那就对了 Oh, oh, okay that makes sense.
你是我们的新室内设计师 You're our new interior designer.
花时间和本在屋子里搬咖啡桌 Spend your time moving a coffee table across the room with Ben,
因为找一个活的未婚的单身汉 because finding a single guy
太吓人了 who's real and available is too scary.
也许你该学会告诉本 Well, maybe you should learn to talk to Ben
你的感受 而不是 about your feelings instead of stuffing them
在垂直跑步机上跑150公里 inside a 90-mile vertical treadmill run.
所以你就做这些 So is this what you do?
在别人的生活里作秀 You insert your drama into other people's lives
就因为你不能过好自己的生活 'cause you can't deal with your own?
不 我把我的生活打理得很好 好吗 No, I'm dealing with mine just fine, all right?
我锻炼 身材很好 I'm working out. I'm in shape.
又很漂亮 我戒酒 I look great. I quit drinking for...
- 四个小时了 - 你骗了我 - four hours... - You lied to me.
你知道吗 You know what? No.
我活该 因为这么些年我一直在撒谎 I deserved it, because I have been lying for years.
你想听真话 我讨厌这里 You wanna know the truth? I hate it here.
我讨厌佩西恩斯 我讨厌我的生活 I hate Patience. I hate my life,
我讨厌我真的相信你是我的朋友 and I hate that I really thought you were my friend,
我很高兴在我验孕的时候 and I'm glad that I pissed on your hand
尿在你手上了 when I took that pregnancy test!
什么 What?
我怀孕了 I'm pregnant.
恭喜 Congratulations!
好 好 好 现在是谁藏有秘密 Well, well, well, who's keeping secrets now?
这完全不是 Um, not really the road
你该在现在采取的顺坡下驴的方式 you wanna be drivin' down right now.
- 完全同意 - 是的 - Couldn't agree more. - Okay.
你们信那些屁话吗 Can you believe this shit?
她居然以为我害怕 She actually thinks I'm afraid
和一个活的单身汉在一起 of being with a single man who's real.
扯淡 That's ridiculous.
完全正确 Pretty much dead on.
你很需要人陪伴 You are also really needy.
很好 Perfect.
站在男人一边 Side with the man.
这群男人 丽芙我说得对吗 These guys. Am I right, Liv?
我不怕跟男人有关系 I'm not afraid of being in a real relationship.
什么 来了 What? Oh, coming.
嘿 你们去哪 Uh, oh, hey, hey. Where are you goin'?
除非还有别的架要吵 Shit, unless you got another fight planned,
我想今晚的高潮已经结束了 I'm pretty sure that was the highlight of the night.
不 你们还不能走 还有蛋糕呢 No, no. Um, you can't leave yet... because we still have cake!
对不起 I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. I...
我应该把达茜的事情告诉你 I should've told you about the D'arcy stuff.
我想 你可能也发现了 I figure you're probably, at this point, well aware, but um,
自己嫁给了个笨蛋 you're married to a dipshit.
对不起 I'm sorry.
我应该告诉你的... I should've told you about the...
为什么没和我说呢 Why didn't you tell me?
我不知道 我不知道 I don't know. I don't know...
我很害怕 而且我们没有深入交流过了 I...was...scared, and we don't really talk anymore.
不论有什么可能的事情发生 Anytime anything remotely uncomfortable comes up,
我们都是上床解决 we just... we just have sex
却没有好好聊过 instead of talking about what's really going on.
那我们现在聊聊 Then, then...Let's talk. Right now.
我们有孩子了 We're gonna have a baby.
很有意义 That's...a lot.
的确很有意义 It's a lot, a lot.
♪祝你生日快乐 哈利♪ Happy birthday, dear Harry
♪祝你生日快乐♪ Happy birthday to you
吹蜡烛吧 You can go ahead and blow out the candles.
不 No.
我不喜欢吃蛋糕 I do not like cake.
不吹蜡烛的话 Well, if you don't blow out the candles,
你许的愿就白费了 your wish won't come true.
我来帮你吧 I'll help you out, Harry.
有人在厕所啪啪啪 And someone's having sex in the bathroom.
别担心这破房子了 Now, do not be concerned. These old houses...
打不过就加入他们 You can't beat them, but join them!
大家都坐吧 Everybody just sit tight, okay?
都别走 爸 Nobody leave. Dad,
陪我下楼检查下电闸 can you help me go downstairs, check the breaker?
行 You bet.
可能是浣熊把电线咬断了 Raccoons probably chewed through the wires.
我曾经接到过这样的报案 Yeah, you know, I got this call once.
有只土拨鼠跑进电闸箱里了 It was a woodchuck that got into a fuse box.
被烤了个六成熟 Fried the poor little guy medium rare.
最离谱的是 Do you know what the crazy part is?
你们知道闻起来像什么味吗 You know what it smelled like?
凯撒色拉 Caesar salad.
很香吧 Delicious.
别担心浣熊了 Do not worry about the raccoon.
我出去放个夹子 I'm going outside to set a trap.
浣熊应该不吃派吧 Oh, I don't think raccoons eat pies.
不 小哈利们吃 No. Harrys do.
你们可以吃那个垃圾蛋糕 You can have garbage cake.
谁会放把装了弹的枪在家里 Who keeps loaded rifles in their house?
这能用来保护我们 对付外星人蛋宝宝 We're protecting ourselves from an outer space egg baby.
这就是你想知道的 That's the question you're asking, Dad?
你偷水果了吗 Hey, did you steal fruit?
没错比金斯先生 所有的苹果都是我偷的 Oh, yes, Mr. Biggins, I stole all the apples.
- 你要惩罚我 - 尝尝这个 - I need to be punished. - How about this?
天呐 Jesus.
我发誓 比金斯先生 我没有任何不敬 I swear, Mr. Biggins, I didn't mean any disrespect.
这样才对 You in the right business.
宝贝儿... Baby...
小宝贝 Little baby. Agh!
到这来 Come here.
你们怎么在这 What are you doing here?
我们来提醒你注意黑衣人 We came to warn you about the Men in Black.
- 他们把伊森医生抓走了 - 什么 - They took Dr. Ethan. - What?
春天时 马克斯告诉黑衣人伊森是外星人 In the spring, Max told them he was the alien.
你不能把我的词抢了 Hey, you don't speak for me.
她说的是对的 Yeah, what she said is right.
要是他们发现他是人类 Anyway, once they realize he's a human,
他们会来抓哈利的 they're gonna come back for Harry.
另外 外边还有个外星人宝宝杀害动物 Plus, there's an alien baby killing animals outside, just FYI.
这我知道 多谢提醒 Yup. I know about that. Um, thank you for telling me.
你能把他们送回家 Can you please sneak them home
确保他们不被吃掉吗 and make sure they don't get eaten?
他们交给我了 I'll take care of them.
但你似乎一时半会 But it looks like you're not gonna have
要没有灯了 any lights for a while longer.
你们怎么会在这 Okay. What are you guys even doing here?
你们的保姆呢 Don't you have a babysitter?
是艾伦 It's Ellen.
别说了 乖乖回家 Say no more. Okay, get home safe.
我觉着这个派对很怪 I think this is a really weird party.
但是蛋糕不错 Good cake, though.
如果我喜欢看别的夫妇激战 我坏吗 Am I a bad person if I like seeing other couples fight?
那你可坏透了 You're a horrible person.
亲爱的 怎么了 Honey? What's wrong?
我觉得不对劲 Something happened to me.
在佩西恩斯有外星人活动 There's alien activity here, in Patience. I know it.
你想怎么做 What are you gonna do?
我能做的只有 The only thing I can do.
打电话给外星人追踪者 I'm gonna call the alien tracker and tell him to come to
让他来这找外星人 Patience and find himself an alien.
大伙儿 不好意思 Sorry about that, guys!
浣熊把这弄停电了 Raccoon definitely knocked out the power.
没修好之前 我们最好别轻举妄动 Um, until we figure this out, I think we should just stay put.
最好给达茜打个电话 她刚走 Better call D'arcy. She just left.
见鬼 Ugh, damn it.
嘿 Hey!
枪不错 Nice rifle.
你是出来打猎吗 You headed out to scare up some vittles?
你没听见吗 外边有只疯浣熊在乱窜 Didn't you hear? There's a rabid raccoon on the loose.
可能我会被咬吧 Good. Maybe it'll bite me.
如果我口吐白沫 别开枪 If I start foaming at the mouth, don't shoot me.
让我受尽折磨 Just...let me suffer.
别听她说的 Don't listen to anything she says.
那不是真的 It's not true.
就是真的 Yeah it is, though.
你知道我第一次见埃利奥特心里想的什么吗 Do you know what my very first thought was when I met Elliot?
翘臀 Nice ass?
没错 Yes.
那你知道我还想着什么吗 Do you know what my second thought was?
我多久会搞砸 How long till I mess this up?
我到底怎么了 What the shit is wrong with me?
那就别搞砸 给他打电话 So un-mess it. Call him.
对 没错 Yeah, right.
现在就打 Call him now.
别怕我有枪 I have a gun.
我不会打电话的 I'm not calling him.
- 那我来 - 别 - Okay, I'll do it. - No.
千万别 No, no, no, no.
- 让我来打 - 你不能打给他 - No, no, I'll just do it. - You won't do that, 'cause no,
我会给他发信息 I'll text him.
我给他发信息 Okay, I'll text him! I'll text him.
该发什么呢 What do I even say?
发个"Hi" Uh, how about "Hi?"
真聪明 That's kind of brilliant.
好了 发出去了 Okay, it's sent.
现在我要难受两周 Ugh! Now I just have to be nauseous for two weeks
等他的消息... waiting to see if he...
- 哦 天呐 - "Hi" - Oh, my God. - Hey! Hi.
你真聪明 You're a goddamn genius.
一个简单的"Hi"真的能行 Hi. It's simple. It works.
你准备回什么 Yes. Okay, are you gonna write back?
不 过几天再说 我难道这么急不可耐么 No. I mean, in a couple days. What am I, desperate?
宝贝 这是给你的 Baby, this is for you.
快来吃吧 Come and get it!
你好 哈利 Hello, Harry.
我是歌利亚 I'm Goliath.
歌利亚 Goliath.
为什么你在个混血外星婴儿里 Why are you inside a hybrid alien baby?
很聪明 不是吗 Clever, right?
我得给你捎个信 非常重要 I needed to send you a message, and this is a big one.
首先 我们的同胞 First, you need to know that our people
不会来这杀掉所有人 are not coming to kill everyone.
他们为什么不来 Why are they not coming?
因为太危险了 Because it's too dangerous.
另外一个外星种族想要占领地球 There's an alien race that's planning to take over the Earth.
他们已经来了 哈利 They're here, Harry.
什么外星种族 What alien race?
你要小心 他们已经... You must be careful. They are...
什么... Wha...
不... No...
你应该待在科罗拉多完成你的工作 You should've just stayed in Colorado and done your job.
你开枪打了我 You shot me.
没错 就像你在纽约杀了我的两个人一样 Yeah, like you shot two of my guys in New York.
我不该让你杀了山姆·霍奇斯 I should have never made you kill Sam Hodges.
我应该自己解决的 I should have just taken care of it myself.
阿斯塔 Asta.
天啊 Holy shit.
哈利... Harry...