ShinY
深影
本字幕由 ShinY 深影字幕组原创翻译制作
深影译站地址http://sysub.vip
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当 年
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翻译： Tammy 少萝东 雪莱
ShinY
深影
老天爷 怎么回事 Holy fuck! What the fuck?
ShinY
深影
无掠夺者 安全 No predators, we're clear.
大降价 待售 拎包入住
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校对： 小和尚 阿谚 后期： 孤亦
女士 这间破破烂烂的屋子挡住了飞船着陆 Hey, lady! This poorly built structure got in the way of our landing!
要是你把我的星际巡洋舰划花了... If you've so much as scratched my star cruiser...
您好 我叫泰里 他叫科沃 我们是新来的 Greetings! I'm Terry, and this is Korvo. We're new around these parts.
可以告诉我们 你们这边最帅的墓地在哪吗 Can you point us toward your sexiest graveyard?
什么 不行 我们还要执行任务 What? No. We're on a mission!
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深影
我们能住在这吗 科沃 Can we live in this house, Korvo?
- 求求你 - 不行 - Please? - No!
我们得在这片大陆的中心点 We're going to build a huge, imposing technotower
建造雄伟壮观且富有科技感的大楼 in the center of the continent.
要是你们买下这套房子 Uh, if you purchase the house,
我将附赠一把电吉他 I'll throw in a sweet-ass electric guitar.
有什么好商量的 我们不需要电吉他 Why are we huddling? We don't need an electric guitar.
我们可以组建乐队 We could start a band!
ShinY
深影
酷飒的外星人任务开展起来会更顺利 It would help the mission because of how cool we would look.
ShinY
深影
玩摇滚和咕叽咕叽是我一直想干的事 I've always wanted to rock 'n' roll and !
coochi-coo是家长逗小孩时会发出的声音
行吧 但这间屋子只是临时住所 Fine! But we're not staying in this house long.
我要住高科技大楼 I want my technotower.
爱莎 AISHA.
我要跟这个两足兽砍价 Monitor ship systems
这期间你负责监控飞船系统 while I haggle with this biped.
指令已收到 Orders received.
爱莎程序将监控飞船系统 AISHA program will monitor systems
直到进一步指示 until further instructions.
飞船维修讨论会暨墨西哥卷品鉴会
麦片粥 麦片粥 麦片粥 Trixi, Trix, Trix, Trix!
注: Trix是美国一种非常有名的麦片粥
♪ 老杂种的智商有待商榷 ♪ Flyness of a scrub is up for debate
凯思家的芙特糖 And your Fruit by Keith by the Foot
Fruit by the Foot是一种凝胶水果软糖
吃起来就像是凯丝屁股拉出来的大便 tastes like Poop by Keith from the Butt!
都怪你 我藏起来的坦克最后报废了 I wasted my cool-ass hidden tank because of you!
死 死 Die, die!
外星也难民 第四季 第三集
现 在
天堂崭新的一天 音乐 Ahhh, another goddamn day in paradise. Music!
来杯咖啡 宝子 Coffee me, baby!
兄弟 泡得不错 Man, that looks good.
要是我有鼻子有嘴 我就能尽情享用了 If I had a nose or mouth, I'd savor the shit out of it.
查看飞船监控 Scannin' ship monitors,
刷洗过滤器里过夜的滤烟装置 擦窗户 scrubbin' overnight sploof from the jipefilters, washin' windows.
噢 Ooh!
凯尔文 在线
最近怎样 爱莎 What's up, AISHA.
有空跟我玩朋友来填词吗 You have time to play some Words With F?
嗨 凯文 我可以 Hey, Calvin! I think I can swing it.
上次我们结束前的最后一个单词是"风骚" Pretty sure we ended last time with the word voluptuous.
那个词我一下就想起来了 Well, that one was easy to come up with.
因为当时我正在看着你 I was lookin' right at you.
你好坏 凯尔文 Damn, Calvin.
那我们开始吧 Alright, let's do this.
我舍友们一般九点前都不会起床 所以... My roommates don't usually get up before nine, so...
爱莎 洋洋乐把我所有的 AISHA, Yumyulack destroyed
注: 兰尼·克拉维茨是美国摇滚歌手
兰尼·克拉维茨娃娃都弄坏了 all my Lenny Kravitz dolls
因为他嫉妒兰尼的腹肌 'cause he was threatened by Lenny's amazing abs!
一个五十九岁的男人怎么可能 There's no way a 59-year-old man has
有那么紧实的六块腹肌 that tight of a six-pack!
爱莎 你能不能提醒泰里 AISHA, will you please remind Terrance
当初赢得这双托马斯·巴哈马人字拖后 the deal we made
我们是怎么约定的 when we won the pair of kick-ass Thomas Bahama flip-flops?
他周内用 我周末用 He has them during the week, and I have them on the weekends.
但大家都知道 你总是能在周六 But everyone knows you get all the best floppin'
完成最完美的假摔 done on Saturdays!
- 今天是我的人字拖日 - 去你的 科沃 - It's my flip-flop day! - Fuck you, Korvo!
是我的人字拖日 It's my flip-flop day!
不敢相信 我居然来到了这里 I can't believe I'm here.
这是我保卫墙国的第一晚 First night guarding the wall-in-the-wall.
歌颂杰西 让我能有今天 Praise be to Jesse for makin' this happen.
闭上嘴 睁大眼 Just keep your mouth shut and your eyes open.
我们可不想让那些无神论的异教徒 We don't want any of those godless heathens
溜进我们这边的墙内 getting into our side of the wall.
所以 帕特 你守卫墙国多少年了 So, Pat, how long have you been guarding the wall-in-the-wall?
我曾帮忙建造墙国 没日没夜地搭建 I helped build it. Went up almost overnight.
坏人们根本没料到 Bad side didn't see it comin'.
西斯托修女说过 这是唯一可以阻挡无神论者 Sister Sisto said it was the only way
和保护婴儿的方式 to keep the non-believers out and protect the baby.
我曾在教堂亲眼见到过杰西上帝 I saw Jessius once at a viewing at the church.
看到那个神奇的小婴儿时 我还激动得尿裤子了 Pissed my pants in joy seeing that amazing baby.
尿沿着腿直流 Went straight down my leg.
地上一大滩 每个人都看见了 Huge puddle on the ground, everyone saw it.
太尴尬了 但是超值的 So embarrassing, but totally worth it.
听着 本尼 你需要时刻保持警惕 Listen, Benny, you gotta always be alert.
听到了吗 You hear that?
听到坏人那边 怪物的声响吗 You hear those monsters on the bad side?
那是无神论者的哀嚎 That's the sound of godlessness.
我听到了 Oh, yeah, I hear it now.
非常无神 It's so lessness of God.
他们只想推翻这面墙 再将我们杀掉 All they want to do is break down the wall and kill us.
但我们不会让这种事发生 对吧 But we're not gonna let that happen, right?
虽然 我刚刚说 我因为见到婴儿 I mean, I did just admit I pissed myself
尿了裤子 但是 不会 because I saw a baby, but, no!
我很勇敢 我们能做到 I'm tough. We've got this.
快走 Come on.
巧鳄检查点晚上要关门了 They're closing Checkpoint Chocodile for the night.
酷 巧鳄检查点是什么 Cool! What's Checkpoint Chocodile?
穿越墙国的唯一正式通道 Only official way to cross the wall.
根据杰西在本田快乐日 Named after the chocolate-covered Twinkie Jesse gave us
给我们的巧克力涂层小蛋糕命名 to celebrate Happy Honda Days.
关门 Close the gate!
帕特 我的腿 Oh, Pat, my leg!
我给勾住了 I'm caught! Ahhh!
完了 别转了 Shit! Shit! Stop the crank!
我害怕 我又尿了 I'm scared! Oh God, I'm peeing again.
- 天啊 - 别转了 我去 - Oh, man. - Stop the crank, dammit!
抱歉我尿你身上了 帕特 I'm sorry I peed on you, Pat.
没关系 很久之前 It's okay. In the before-fore,
我是美国国会的高级保镖 I was a high-end escort working Capitol Hill.
很多参议员都尿过我 名字就不透露了 Got peed on by most of the senators. I won't say names.
- 特德·克鲁兹 - 但愿吧 - Ted Cruz? - Ugh, I wish.
特德·克鲁兹是美国共和党人 美国得克萨斯州联邦参议员
跟特德的事没那么简单 It was way more involved with Ted.
好 最后一个问题 Okay, last question,
乔纳斯兄弟里 最后是谁去了大学 which Jonas brother actually went to college?
注: 美国流行摇滚乐队
简单 二哥去了 That's easy. Jelbort.
在哥伦比亚大学学习天体物理学 Studied astrophysics at Columbia.
是什么样的考试 What the fuck kinda test is this?
学校里发生了什么 What's happenin' at that school?
自从声破天买下学校后 It's gotten weird since
Spotify: 在线流媒体音乐播放平台
一切就变得有些奇怪 Spotify bought the school.
但若不是这样 But without that,
我怎么会知道 波兹·马龙解放了奴隶 I wouldn't have known that Post Malone freed the slaves.
美国男歌手 词曲作者
新消息
爱莎 你好激动 Ooh, AISHA, you're blowin' up, girl.
凯尔文发来的 It's from Calvin.
他要来镇上出差一整天 He's gonna be in town on business for the day
而且 他想跟我见面 and wants to meet me!
看来他想要 不只是朋友的填词 Looks like he wants to be "Words With More Than Friends."
懂了吗 不只是朋友 去吧 Get it? More than friends. Like, doing it.
爱爱嘛 我懂的 The fuck? Yeah, I got it.
我们已经聊了几个月了 We've been talkin' for months,
但我不知道我是否准备好了 but I don't know if I'm ready
在现实里去见他一面 to meet him in real life.
爱莎交男朋友了 爱莎交男朋友了 AISHA got a boyfriend! AISHA got a boyfriend!
闭嘴啦 我没有 Shut up! I do not.
很奇怪 我们计划三月去五大湖玩 It's weird. We have plans to go on a Great Lakes Cruise in March,
但不包括密西根湖 素壁利亚湖和休伦湖 which doesn't include Lakes Michigan, Superior, or Huron.
那是我们第一次约会 That was gonna be our first time meeting.
他可能就是想检查一下货物 是吧 He probably just wants to check out the goods, you know?
我在想你该穿什么呢 I wonder what you should wear.
你知道我什么意思嘛 You know what this means?
你最好他妈不要说... Don't you dare fuckin' say
服装蒙太奇 Outfit montage!
♪ 舞动起来 ♪ ♪ Get your body movin',get your body, body ♪
♪ 舞动起来 ♪ ♪ Get your body movin',get your, get ♪
完美 Perfecto!
我要求你告诉我你们在聊啥 I demand to know what you're talking about
即使我可能根本不在乎 even though I probably won't give a shit.
爱莎的相好要来镇上啦 AISHA's boy toy's comin' to town
玩点花的床上小游戏 for a little roll in the sheets, some hanky-panky,
魔杖要开启神秘洞穴咯 puttin' the wand in the chamber of secrets,
想要就来嘛 if you're buyin' what I'm sellin'.
噢噢 我这就来 Oh-ho, I'm buying.
爱莎 他知道你是个超级计算机吗 AISHA, does he know you're a super computer?
- 知道啊 他不介意 - 真的吗 - Yeah, he's cool with it. - Really?
他只是一个普通的蠢蛋 'Cause he's, like, a regular schmo
但你可是超牛逼的AI and you're a badass AI bitch.
这没道理 It'll never work.
对啊 如果我们互相看不惯怎么办呀 Oh, yeah. What if we're not compatible?
也许我应该3D打印一个真人 Maybe I should 3D print myself into a real person,
那种有大腿肥臀的形象 with legs and a fat ass.
没必要 他会爱上你本来的样子的 No way. He's gonna love you for you.
告诉他 洋洋乐 Tell her, Yumyulack.
他在美化你 He's catfishing you.
他很有可能就只是想 He probably just wants you
让你帮他算算哪个车险划算或者别的什么 to calculate better car insurance for him or something.
别听他的 他真膈应 Don't listen to him, he's bitter.
我可太膈应了 I'm super bitter!
泰里把苹果电脑和芝士烧得厨房里到处都是 Terry burned mac and cheese, and it's all over the kitchen!
这很不容易的 好吧 It's hard, okay?
你得精确地知道什么时候 You have to know exactly when the cheese gets unstuck
芝士才能从天花板上融化 from the ceiling and falls
掉到一桶沸腾的鹅油里面 into the vat of boiling goose fat.
只要用一下我给你们打造的清理机器人就行了 Just use the cleaning robot I built for you guys.
它坏了 科沃还想让我去清理烂摊子 It's broken and Korvo wants me to mop up the mess!
我 拖地 我这样的混蛋可不会拖地 Me? Mopping? This hardcunt don't mop!
也许我不该去见凯尔文 Maybe I shouldn't go meet Calvin.
这里有太多事情要处理了 There's a lot goin' on here.
你得去 You're going.
各位 爱莎有一场浪漫约会 Guys, AISHA has a hot date.
我们还是能够照顾好自己几个小时的 对吧 We can take care of ourselves for a couple hours, right?
是啊 你 你应该去 Yes, y-you should go.
我可以用一些多出来的飞船和擎天柱零件 I can probably build a new cleaning robot
造一个新的清洁机器人 out of some spare ship parts and old Optimus Prime.
那这里就搞定啦 耶 Then it's settled. Yay!
玩得开心 爱莎 无所顾忌地起舞吧 Have fun, AISHA. Dance like nobody's watching!
就是小心别被骗了 Just watch out for the catfish.
我在大凤凰区有好几个女友 I've had multiple girlfriends
都是在试着 in the greater Phoenix area who were just trying
诈骗我收集的魔法卡片 to grift me out of my Magic: The Gathering cards.
其中一个拿走了我的黑莲花 One of them got my Black Lotus.
- 啊 - 噢 - Oof! - Ouch!
啊 神明 Oh, divine one,
请保佑我能迎来果实的大丰收 please bless me with a bountiful Craisin harvest
这样我就能在你的蝴蝶结下 so that I may feed my brothers and sisters
养育我的兄弟姐妹门了 under your bow!
搞什么 What the hell?
不不不 No, no, no.
这些数据 不可能是真的 These numbers, they can't be right.
我的杰西老天啊 墙里变得更冷了 Oh, my Jesse! It's getting colder in the Wall!
啊 太蠢了 我在这里干啥啊 Okay, this is stupid. What am I doin' here?
我应该造点腿出来的 I should have made some legs.
爱莎 我们遇到问题了 AISHA, we got a problem.
我造了一个过于聪明的清洁机器人 I made the cleaning robot too smart,
它有点过于敏感了 and it's gained fucking sentience
我十分肯定能它想要杀了我们 and I'm pretty sure it's trying to kill us.
而且 泰里已经受机器人控制了 Plus, Terry's already under the robot's spell
他在帮他打手枪 and is helping him!
他这个飞机仔 He's such a wanker!
一切正常 没人想杀我们 Everything's fine. No one is killing anyone.
哈哈 哈哈 Ha-ha, ha-ha.
爱莎 别管他们了 我们挺好 怎么样了 Aishe, ignore them, we're fine. How's it going?
我想要看所有的细节 I want all the juicy deets!
嘿 把凯尔文的身份证偷过来 Yo, steal Calvin's ID.
我们可以私底下调查他的背景 We can do a background check on the creepo!
爱莎 你看起来真美 AISHA? You look beautiful.
我是说 你的身材比 I-I mean, a little more
我想的还要更L形一点 L-shaped than I thought you'd be,
但是很赞 but god damn.
你说什么 What's that?
你说你只是一个滑板车 You mean to tell me you're just a scooter
并不是什么超级计算机 and not a super computer,
现在我看起来完全像个傻瓜 and now I look like a total idiot?
哈哈 很有趣 过来嘛 Ha ha, very funny. Get over here.
对不起 我的错 有点紧张 Sorry, my bad. A little nervous.
我承认 这是个愚蠢的笑话 I got to admit. It's a stupid joke.
我喜欢 很高兴终于见到你了 凯尔文 I liked it. It's nice to finally meet you, Calvin.
我也是 You too!
我想了想 既然我来镇上了 I figured, since I was in town,
为什么不见见我聊得最好的朋友呢 why not see my best Words with Friend?
我很高兴你来了 我们要做点什么呢 I'm glad you did! What should we do?
在无用美术馆里 There's a Super Smash Bros.
有一场任天堂大乱斗混战的展览 Melee exhibit at the Museum of Useless Art.
或者去我的外星之家 他们有成吨的海洛因 Or my aliens have a ton of heroin just sittin' around the house?
只要跟你在一起 我不在乎做什么 I don't care what we do, as long as I'm with you.
还有 别碰海洛因了 Also, let's not do the heroin thing.
那玩意让你的血液很不舒服 That stuff'll make your blood itch.
纪念品 来拥有你的杰西纪念品吧 Souvenirs! Get your Jesse souvenirs here!
我们有头戴蝴蝶结款的祈祷雕像 We got Bow-sary beads, we got prayer statues!
杰瑞 杰瑞 墙内正在发生很糟糕的事情 Jerry! Jerry, something terrible is happening to the Wall!
噢 我的蝴蝶结 是那些坏面的异教徒要来 Oh, my bow, are the heathens from the bad side comin' over
一边唱着Lady Gaga to stick their penises
一边把鸡巴塞到我们耳朵里吗 in our ears and sing Lady Gaga?
不 是... No, it's...
等等 你认为异教徒会做那些是吗 Wait, is that what you think the heathens do?
我只是听说他们很疯狂 I've heard they're crazy.
他们还想把舌头塞到我们屁股里面 They also want to shove their tongues in our butts
再拔我们的头发 and pull our hair!
异教徒才不会做那些而且... Heathens don't do that and...
听着 你要是对这些很不安 Listen, I can't tell if you're terrified
或者很兴奋我就没法跟你交流了 or excited about this.
我为什么要因为有人边唱坏浪漫 Why would I be excited about having a tongue
美国女歌手Lady Gaga演唱的一首流行舞曲
边把舌头塞在我屁眼里感到很兴奋 in my butt while they sing Bad Romance?
那可能一点都不爽 That probably doesn't feel amazing at all!
算了 听着 我是来告诉你 Whatever.Look, I came to tell you
墙内的温度正在每天下降四分之一度 that the Wall is getting a quarter degree colder every day!
所以异教徒不会来 So the heathens aren't coming over
用鸡巴插我们的耳朵了吗 to stick their penises in our ears?
什么 不是 杰瑞 这很重要 What? No. Jerry, this is important.
根据我的计算 By my calculations,
两个月墙内就会完全冻上 the Wall could be frozen over in two months.
所有人都要死 Everyone will die!
我不信 你怎么知道的 I don't buy it. How could you know that?
我以前可是安装通风空调的师傅 I was an HVAC guy in the before-fore.
气温有什么不对劲我看一眼就知道 妈的 I know an over-air conditioned room when I see one, dammit!
好吧 所以要变冷了呗 你想干啥 Okay, so it's getting colder. What do you wanna do?
我要去见西斯托修女 我需要警告她 I'm gonna go see Sister Sisto. I need to warn her.
你疯了吗 没人能见她 Are you fuckin' crazy? No one sees Sisto.
你甚至连怎么进去都不知道 How would you even get in?
我需要你帮我联系蒙特兹 I need you to put me in touch with Montez.
没门 蒙特兹是个疯子 No way, Montez is scary.
你要是看见他和他的打手出现在你门前 If he and his goons show up at your door,
你已经死了 you're already dead.
你欠我的 You owe me.
要不是我救你出来 You could've been stuck on the heathen side,
你可能还困在异教徒那边 and I got you out.
拜托了 杰瑞 这很严重 Please, Jerry, this is serious.
好吧 Fine!
但等到蒙特兹撕烂了我们的头 But if Montez rips off our heads and sticks his penis
还操我们耳朵的时候 别说我没告诉过你 in our ears, don't say I didn't warn you.
噢 我的天 现在我们这边也开始 Oh, my God, now our side is stickin' penises
操人耳朵了吗 你有毛病吧 in people's ears? You have a problem.
有爱被人操耳朵的毛病吗 A problem with keepin' my ears penis-free?
那看来我们都有这个毛病 老兄 Well, that's a problem we all have, buddy boy!
没错 这里就是 吉娜戴维斯村
♪ 云卷云舒 ♪ ♪ Clouds rolled away ♪
♪ 花开花落 ♪ ♪ Rolled back through ♪
♪ 又是一天 ♪ ♪ Another way ♪
♪ 灿烂阳光下 ♪ ♪ Sun shine on me ♪
♪ 你我共沐浴 ♪ ♪ Let it shine on you ♪
哇 你什么时候这么擅长打筒子鼓的啊 Damn, when did you get so good at bucket drums?
萨克勒一家以前经常雇我 The Sacklers used to hire me to play them
在他们的晚餐排队上演奏 at their dinner parties.
我能靠这拿钱呢 I got paid in oxy!
♪ 所有的一切都如此简单 ♪ ♪ It all comes down to what I've already known ♪
♪ 你的爱就是我的归宿 ♪ ♪ Your love knows how to bring me home ♪
你是准备吻我吗 Are you gonna kiss me?
我是有这个想法 I was thinkin' about it.
好了 别光是想了 傻瓜 Well, stop thinkin', fool.
爱莎快来帮帮我 AISHA, you gotta help me!
待在这里不要动 我马上回来 Don't go anywhere. I'll be back.
你们到底想干什么 洋洋乐 What the hell do you want,Yumyulack?
那个清洁机器人想要杀了我 The cleaning robot's gonna kill me,
而且他现在想用被称为杰罗姆 and now he wants to be called Jerome
就因为匹兹堡钢厂成就了杰罗姆·贝蒂斯 after Pittsburgh Steeler great Jerome Bettis.
泰里把科沃关在了浴室 Terry trapped Korvo in the bathroom,
然后他和杰西现在冲着我来了 and he and Jesse are comin' for me.
我正在忙 你能等等吗 I'm kinda in the middle of somethin'. Can it wait?
也许吧 Uh, I guess.
哦 我黑到了凯尔文的身份信息 Oh, I also hacked into Calvin's identity,
他说他来镇上出差很不对劲哎 and it's weird that he said he's in town for business
因为他早在一个月前就被解雇了 because he got fired from his job a month ago.
我就说他狗屁不是 I told you he was a piece of shit!
啊 不 他们来了 保佑我吧 Oh no, they're coming. Pray for me!
一个月前 A month ago?
刚刚说到哪了 Now where were we?
哦 你来啦 正要历史性地接吻呢 Oh, that's right, about to make kissing history.
一个男人跟一个性感的蓝色大球 A man and the sexiest blue orb ever.
你来这里出差的事情是不是骗我的 Did you lie to me about coming here for business?
你被解雇了对吧 Did you get fired?
我 我 我能解释 I, I, I can explain.
什么鬼啊 What the hell?
好吧 是的 我不是来这里出差的 Okay, yeah, I'm not here for business.
还有 我确实被解雇了 And, yes, I got fired.
洋洋乐说的对 你就是在欺骗我 Yumyulack was right! You are catfishin' me!
我才不会帮你计算车祸保险了 I will not help you get better collision insurance!
不 别啊 我没有骗你 好吗 No, no, no! I'm not catfishing you, okay?
听着 我今天来这里是因为 Look, I came here today because I wanted
我想跟你当面聊一聊 to talk to you face to orb.
我的生活发生了很多改变 So much in my life is changing and I,
但我不知从何说起 I didn't know how to say it.
说吧 So, say it.
只要告诉我一件事就行了 Just tell me one thing.
我们还会去五大湖游玩吗 Are we still goin' on our Great Lakes Cruise
那个不包括密歇根湖 that doesn't include Lake Michigan,
苏必略湖和休伦湖的游轮 Superior, or Huron?
我去不了 I can't.
那好 如果说 Well, what about, like,
安排在四月或者以后的时间呢 in April or some other time in the future?
不 我们没有以后了 No. Because we don't have a future.
就因为我是个超厉害的AI电脑 Because I'm a bad bitch AI super computer
你只是一个普通人吗 我就知道 and you a basic ass human,I knew it!
亲爱的 等等 Baby, wait!
别叫我宝贝 你这个大混蛋 Don't baby me, you son-of-a-b-hole!
去你的 成人派对 Damn you, quinceañera party!
嗯 蒙特兹 Uh, Montez?
谁在他妈说话 Who the fuck's askin'?
是 是杰瑞 市场那边的人 It's, uh, it's Jerry.From the marketplace.
我们以前踢足球的时候一起做过蛙跳过人那招 We were in that Bowinian Kicking Group where we went around
足球术语 创始者是墨西哥足球运动员布兰科
驱赶那些虚伪的信徒 kicking people who weren't true believers.
哦 是吗 那蛮有趣的 Oh, yeah. That was fun.
我恨无信仰者 你们在看什么 I hate non-believers. What are you lookin' at?
没什么 他 他..别看了 Nothing. He's, he's...Stop looking!
你想瞧瞧吗 You wanna see?
这个家伙 看 他没有做好他的工作 This guy, here,he didn't do his job right.
她想要逃跑 他有一本未经许可的书 She tried to escape. He had an unsanctioned book.
这个人无故就用了杰西的名讳 This one used Jessius' name in vain.
你们的头可以因为很多原因被挂在墙上 Lotta reasons your head can get on this wall.
其中一个就是浪费教会的时间 One of them is by wasting the church's time.
加斯想跟你讲一些事 Garth has something to tell you.
就是说没你的事 对吧 Then that means you don't need to be here, right?
我这就走 I was just leaving!
你想干什么 果农 What do you want, Craisin Man?
墙内的温度每天都在下降四分之一度 Uh, the Wall is getting colder by a quarter degree every day.
按照这个速度 我们在两个月 And at this rate, we'll freeze to death
或者三个月之后都得冻死 in two, maybe three months.
我们需要告诉西斯托修女 We need to tell Sister Sisto.
一派胡言 I smell bullshit.
蒙特兹 这不好 不是吗 Montez, this is bad, okay?
信我一次吧 我们得做些什么 Trust me, we have to do something!
我们什么都不会做 明白了吗 We aren't gonna do anything, you understand?
还有不要再说那些话 Don't ever speak a word of this again
不然今天就是你的死期 or you'll end up right here!
所以当个听话的孩子 现在就给我 Now be a nice boy and go and make me
滚回去做他妈的水果馅饼 a motherfucking craisin cobbler!
嗯 Huh?
这里有人吗 Is this seat taken?
- 爱莎- 不是 - AISHA? - No,
我是来自阿凡达星的娜美人 I'm a Na'vi from planet Avatar.
啊 是爱莎 Yes, it's AISHA!
我用了所有的超级计算机的能力 I used all my supercomputer power
把自己做成了一个女人的全息图 to make myself into a hologram woman.
带腿的 你看 With legs, check it.
让我来...等下 就这样 Let me just... Hold up, I got this.
好啦 像个老板一样坐着 There we go. Sittin' like a boss!
呃 啊 是的 那真是 那真是棒 Uh-huh. Yeah, that's, that's awesome.
这难道不是你想要的吗 Isn't this what you wanted?
现在我们可以一起奔赴未来了 Now we can have a future together.
爱莎 我们不能在一起的原因是 AISHA, the reason we don't have a future together is
我没有未来了 because I don't have a future.
- 我就要死了 - 什么 怎么会 - I'm dying. - What? How?
我在一个有秋千的房子里长大 I grew up in this great little house with a swing
后面还有一个小池塘我每天都会在里面游泳 and a small pond out back that I would swim in every day.
那时就像身处天堂 It was heaven.
美中不足就是它位于斯托佛工厂的旁边 Except it was next to the Stouffer's Factory.
你知道那家填料公司吧 You know, the stuffing company?
我当然知道 Of course, I do.
斯托佛的灶台填料公司 Stouffer's Stove Top Stuffing
只存在于这个节目世界中 exists in the world of this show,
如有雷同 纯属巧合 even if it's a shared false memory in real life.
住在工厂的旁边的问题是 Living next to the factory,
他们没有告诉我们那池塘被污染了 what they didn't tell us was the pond was contaminated
里面满是包装程序中流出的工业面包屑 with industrial breadcrumb runoff from the dressing process.
我是说 这很美味 但是没有办法治愈 I mean, it's delicious but it's incurable.
该死的面包屑 Fuckin' breadcrumbs.
讽刺的是 我大概会在感恩节前死去 Ironically, I'm gonna be dead before Thanksgiving.
但要明确一点 But just to be clear,
那个馅料是不错的配菜 stuffing is an appropriate side dish year round.
凯文 我很抱歉 我也不知道该怎么办 Calvin, I'm so sorry. I had no idea.
我来这里和你度过我为数不多的弥留时光 I came here to spend one of my last good days with you.
我不在乎你是否只是一个全息投影出来的女人 I don't care if you are a holographic simulacrum of a woman.
我爱你只是因为你是你 I love you for you who are.
好消息 爱莎 家中一切安好 Good tidings, AISHA. Everything is fine at home.
你那边怎么样 How are you doing?
这个清洁机器人杰罗姆又棒又酷 Jerome the cleaning robot is very dope and cool,
我们现在相处得好极了 and we're all getting along now.
我们现在说这些都是出于自愿的 没有毛病 We are doing this of our own free will, and nothing is amiss.
我喜欢按算法模式来清洁 I love to clean in an algorithmic pattern.
再见了 朋友 Good-bye to you, friend.
我等一下再处理那个问题 Gonna have to deal with that in a bit.
来吧 我们一起走走 Come on, let's take a walk.
♪ 你知道我想要得到杰西的女孩 ♪ ♪ You know I wish that I had Jessie's girl ♪
♪ 我希望能得到杰西的女孩 ♪ ♪ I wish that I had Jessie's girl ♪
♪ 我去哪才能找到那样的女人 ♪ ♪ Where can I find a woman like that ♪
这是一个幸福的日子 It is truly a blessed day.
圣女杰西赐予了我们一个满满当当的尿不湿 The divine baby Jessius has gifted us with a full diaper!
她的赠予相当慷慨 快靠上来涂上 Her tidings are bountiful! Approach for your smearing.
愿蝴蝶结与你同在 愿蝴蝶结与你同在 May the bow be with you. May the bow be with you,
愿蝴蝶结与你同在 May the bow be with you.
把杰西放进她的婴儿围栏里 Put Pez-- Jessius in her safety enclosure.
别来打扰我 I don't wanna be disturbed.
越橘葡萄干 Craisinberry?
抓住他 他不该出现在这里 Grab him! He's not supposed to be here!
拜托了 修女 我必须告诉你一些事 Please, Sister, I have to tell you something!
墙壁开始变冷了 我们都会死的 The Wall is getting colder! We're all gonna die!
修女 Sister!
你知道吗 这一天真的很像 You know, this whole day has been
电影《爱在黎明破晓前》 some real Before Sunrise shit.
这一切都很完美 It's been perfect.
我只希望我们能有更多的时间 I just wish we had more time.
这一切不必像这般结束 This doesn't have to be it.
我是个超级电脑 I'm a supercomputer.
我可以把你的意识转移进那个占据了 I could transfer your consciousness into the vacuum
我家里的吸尘器 that took over my family.
那听起来不错 但是 唉 只不适合我 That sounds great, but alas, it's not for me.
我讨厌棉絮啥的 I fuckin' hate lint.
但我真希望我们可以一起去五大湖游船 But I do wish we could've gone on our Great Lakes Cruise together.
那里面可没有算密歇根湖 苏必略湖 It didn't even include Lakes Michigan, Superior,
还有 休伦湖 or Huron.
见鬼 我只想要去伊利湖 Hell, all I needed was Lake Erie.
昨晚 我非常期待能见到你 Last night, I was so excited to see you,
我梦见我们开进了美丽的水牛城 I dreamt of us pulling into that stunning Buffalo Harbor,
欣赏那美丽城市的灯光 watching the lights of that beautiful city,
吃着牛肉三明治和棉花糖 eating beef on weck sandwiches and some sponge candy.
那些都是水牛城的特色呢 Those are some cool Buffalo specifics.
嘿 或许我可以让你那个梦实现一部分 Hey! Maybe I can give you a little bit of that dream.
你知道吗 我其实来这里是为了和你提分手的 You know, I actually came here to break up with you,
因为我们没办法共处更多的时间了 because we can't spend more time together.
我们已经一起度过了一生 We've spent a lifetime together.
在手机上一起玩拼字游戏可算不上度过了一生 Playing generic Scrabble on our phones is hardly a lifetime.
不 我是说今天 No, I mean today.
我计算机的大脑和你们人类的大脑 My computational mind processes time differently
对待时间的看法不同 than your human brain.
你的每一秒 就是我的一百年 Every second for you is a hundred years for me.
等等 那我早些时候打嗝 Wait, so when I burped earlier.
就像是糟糕的一个世纪 It was like a gross century.
但今天 某种方式来说 But today, in a way,
和你一起度过一生的时光就是你给我的礼物 you've given me the gift of spending lifetimes with you.
我永远也不会忘记的 凯尔文 I'll never forget it, Calvin.
我也不会忘记 Neither will I.
嘿 哥们 你那怎么样 Hey, man, how's it going?
你好 我是杰罗姆 清洁机器人 Uh, listen, this is Jerome, the cleaning robot.
我有占据这个房子的完整的计划 I had this whole plan to take over the house,
大概会把这里的每个家伙都杀掉 probably kill everyone,
你懂得 经典机器人整活 you know, classic robot shit,
但这些外星人真让人讨厌 but these aliens are a pain in the ass.
杰罗姆 你看科沃不让我弄坏他的太阳镜 Jerome! Korvo won't let me break his sunglasses!
快把那放下 泰里 Drop those right now, Terry!
那些是我的 我从雪佛兰店里偷来的 Those are mine. I stole them from the Chevron!
无论如何 我想我要准备离开了 So, anyway, I think I'm gonna take off,
也许会去爱荷华州 maybe move to Iowa,
续写下一章美国机器人的伟大传奇 write the next great American robot novel.
我不知道 但可以请你回来吗 I don't know. But can you please come back?
我想如果我离开让这些蠢货无人照料 I think if I leave these dummies unattended,
有人估计要受伤了 someone is gonna get really hurt.
我很快就会回家 I'll be home soon.
噢 谢天谢地 谢谢你 Oh, thank God. Thank you.
对这些我很抱歉 Sorry about everything.
泰里 别喝那个 那上面有有毒标志 Terry, don't drink that! It's clearly marked poison!
嘿 嘿 你胆敢吐在... Hey, hey! Don't you spit it at...
我的孩子 你给了我们太多的越橘葡萄干 My son, you have given us so much Craisin goodness,
我当然会倾听你的故事 of course, I will hear your story.
请说出你的心声 Please, unburden yourself.
噢 修女 感谢蝴蝶结 Oh, Sister, thank the bow.
我已经追踪了几个月 So, I've been tracking
我沼泽地里的水温 the water temperature in my bog for months,
温度变得越来越低了 and it's been getting colder.
是空气 修女 从通风口吹出来的空气是冷的 It's the air, Sister. The air from the vent is blowing cold.
噢 我的天呐 这可糟透了 Oh, my goodness, that is terrible.
你都跟谁说了这些 Who have you told of this?
还没告诉任何人 但我们必须去警告所有人 No one yet, but we have to warn everyone.
嗯哼 是啊 是啊 Uh-huh. Yep, yep.
我们可以那么做 但我们不会 We could totally do that. But we won't.
等等 什么 你在说什么 为什么不 Wait, what, what're you talking about? Why not?
16.7℃
你知道这是什么吗 Do you know what this is?
是啊 那是 弗里德里希牌的 Yeah, that's a Friedrich WallMaster
一一五伏特壁挂空调 115-volt AC unit.
非常好 Very good.
这里这个是给杰西和洋洋乐的房间的 This one right here is for Jesse and Yumyulack's room.
很酷对吧 Innit cool?
非常酷 我们可以用那个来解决天气问题 Very cool! We can use that to fix the weather problem!
我就是天气问题 I am the weather problem.
一直以来是我每天降低一点点温度 I've been lowering the temperature a little bit every single day.
你是唯一注意到的人 You're the only one who's noticed.
剧透一下 接下来每天还会继续变冷 And spoilers: it's going to keep getting colder.
但 但是为什么 But, but why?
把嘴闭上 我可不想只控制一半墙国 Shut the fuck up! I don't wanna run one side of the Wall.
我要控制整个墙国 I want the whole damn Wall!
你为什么要告诉我这些 我不想听到这些 Why are you telling me all of this? I don't wanna hear this.
感觉你好像要陷害我什么 It seems like you're setting me up for something.
你知道异教徒们只是想来到我们这边来 Did you know the heathens just want to come over to our side
把他们的鸡鸡插进我们的耳朵里 and stick their penises in our ears
嘴里还唱着Lady Gaga的歌 while they sing Lady Gaga?
等等 真的吗 Wait, for real?
当然不是 你这个笨蛋 No, you idiot!
那是我编出来的谣言来看我的信众是否会相信 That's a rumor I made up to see if my followers would believe it.
那些蠢蛋会相信任何东西 Those dummies will believe anything,
现在我会去告诉他们是杰西在使天气变冷 and now I'm going to tell them Jesse is making it colder
因为她要去惩罚另一端那些没有信仰的人们 because she's punishing the right side for their godlessness.
噢见鬼 我不需要知道这些 Oh fuck, I didn't need to know that!
你现在 你现在想要杀了我 对吧 You're, you're gonna kill me now, aren't you?
不不不 我决不会杀任何一个我的教徒 No, I would never do that to one of my flock.
那是我需要蒙特兹去干的事 That's what I have Montez for.
爱莎 泰里弄丢了电视遥控器 AISHA, Terry lost the remote for the TV,
现在它卡在了杰夫·福克斯沃西的特别节目上 and now it's stuck on a Jeff Foxworthy special!
美国演员
而我非常着急搞清楚我到底是不是个乡巴佬 But I desperately need to find out if I might be a redneck!
而我正准备看《震惊头脑》 And I was gonna watch Mind Freak!
一档电视魔术秀
我差不多有三个月没有见证奇迹了 My mind hasn't been freaked in, like, three months!
不 我想先看《德国烘焙大赛》 Not before I watch the Great German Bake Off.
这周是炸肉排大战土豆丝饼 It's schnitzel vs. kartoffelpuffer week!
到底啥是乡巴佬 What even is a redneck?
- 别人在乎 - 烘焙才能让我冷静 - No one cares! - Baking calms me!
所有人把嘴闭上 Everybody shut the fuck up!
爱莎到家了 我会照看一切的 AISHA's home. I'll take care of everything.
你们也许是一群蠢蛋 You might be a bunch of stupid motherfuckers,
但你们也是我的蠢蛋 but you're my stupid motherfuckers.
- 耶 - 啊呜 - Yeah! - Aww.
耶 很好 都过来 Yeah, that's right. Bring it in.
放马过来 Come on now.
伙计 我跟你说了把这些都忘掉 Man, I told you to forget all of this.
我试过去警告你了 但你不听 I tried to warn you, but you didn't listen
看看你现在 and look at you now.
该死的笨蛋 Fucking idiot.
见鬼 这一切不必如此的 Goddammit, it doesn't have to be this way.
别再这样了 Not anymore.
别再这样了 Not anymore!
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