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没错 That's right.
是纽约 New York.
1958年 It's 1958.
总之 几分钟之后 Anyway, for a few more minutes it is.
就是午夜 那就到了1959年了 Come midnight, it's gonna be 1959.
完全不同的感觉 新年 A whole other feeling. The new year.
未来 The future.
地球老爷爷开始了又一轮的环日旅行 Yeah, Old Daddy Earth fixing to start one more trip around the sun.
每个人都希望这次能更精彩… Everybody hoping this ride round be a little more giddy...
更快乐 a little more gay.
整个城市都弥漫着香槟的味道 Yup, all over town, champagne corks is a-popping.
在华德福大人物们在盖·伦巴多的旋律中起舞 Over in the Waldorf, the big shots is dancing to the strains of Guy Lombardo.
时代广场上 小家伙边看边等大汽球掉下来 In Times Square, the little folks is watching and waiting for that big ball to drop.
他们都想把握那一刻… They're all trying to catch hold of one moment of time...
来声称: "趁现在 就是它 我成功了" to be able to say, "Right now! This is it! I got it!"
当然 到那时候已经晚了 Of course, by then it'll be past.
不过他们都很高兴… 每个人都玩得很开心 But they're all happy, everybody having a good time.
嗯 几乎是每个人 Well, almost everybody.
还有少许失落的灵魂在四周漂流 There's a few lost souls floating around out there.
如果你不是城里人… Now, if you all ain't from the city...
那我要说现在有一种说法叫做"勾心斗角" we got something here called "the rat race."
挖空心思去敛财因此他们不想庆祝… Got a way of chewing folks up so that they don't want no celebrating...
也不想欢呼 don't want no cheering up.
不关心新年的事 Don't care nothing about no New Year's.
没有希望… 没有自由… 没有时间 Out of hope, out of rope, out of time.
这位是诺维尔·巴恩斯 This here is Norville Barnes.
他正要跨出去的那个房间… That office he's stepping out of...
是赫德萨克公司总裁的办公室 is the oddice of the president of Hudsucker Industries.
也就是他的办公室 That's his office.
他为什么站那么高？ How'd he get so high?
他为什么情绪如此低落 And why's he feeling so low?
他真的要那样做吗？ Is he really going to do it?
诺维尔难道真的想跳到人行道上？ Is Norville really gonna jelly up the sidewalk?
嗯未来… 是一种你永远不可预知的东西 Well, the future, that's something you can never tell about.
而过去… But the past, heh-heh...
那可是另外一个故事 that's another story.
主演 蒂姆·罗宾斯
詹妮佛·杰森·蕾
查尔斯·道宁
保罗·纽曼 (饰席德尼·J·穆斯伯格)
吉姆·楚 约翰·马霍尼
比尔·科伯斯 布鲁斯·坎贝尔
《金钱帝国》
(曼希—纽约)
(曼希工商管理大学)
(尼度斯职业中介所)
(5年工作经验)
(必须有经验)
(必须有经验) (有相关经验)
(只招有经验的) (5年工作经验)
第三季度业绩并没有下降的迹象 In the third quarter we saw no signs of weakening.
销售总额与去年相比提升了四分之三… We're up 18 percent over last year's third-quarter gross...
嗯 总之这是个新纪录 and that, needless to say, is a new record.
我们在行业竞争中一路领先并继续乘胜追击 Our competition continues to flag and we continue to take up the slack.
大部分领域的市场份额逐步增长… Market shares in most divisions is increasing...
并且在七个新地区开设了办事处 and we have opened seven new regional offices.
我们的国际分公司… Our international division...
也在过去的六个月中呈现出了良好的上升势头… is also showing vigorous signs of upward movement for the last six months...
我们正在研发中寻求一些刺激点 and we're looking at some exciting things in R&D.
(需有经验…)
(未来就在眼前 赫德萨克公司收入低 工时长 无需经验)
分权别跟我谈什么分权 Sub-franchising. Don't talk to me about sub-franchising.
我们在分权里赚了这么多钱… We're making so much money in sub-franchising...
可一点都不好玩 it isn't even funny.
我们的分支与下属不断扩充… Our nominees and assigns continue to multiply and expand...
增强了我们在国内与国际的影响 extending our influence nationally and abroad.
我们经营业绩的发展… Our owned and operateds are performing...
在国内与海外都超乎想象 far beyond our expectations both here and abroad.
1958年的联邦税收条例… And the Federal Tax Act of 1958...
又免除了我们在农场和重工业上的税 is giving us a swell write-off on our plant and heavies.
我们新发行的债券是今年最火的 And our last debenture issue was this year's fastest seller.
所以前三个季度到目前为止… So third quarter and year-to-date...
我们创造了销售的新纪录总收入的新纪录… we have set a new record in sales, a new record in gross...
税前收入的新纪录… a new record in pre-tax earnings...
税后利润的新纪录… a new record in after-tax profits...
我们股票在去年拆分了两次 and our stock has split twice in the past year.
简而言之… In short...
我们赚翻了 we're loaded.
赫德萨克先生？ Mr. Hudsucker?
浪费了整座基督山真可惜啊 It's a pity to waste a whole Montecristo.
他本应该打开窗户的 He could've opened the window.
沃林·赫德萨克做事总是出人意料 Waring Hudsucker never did anything the easy way.
为什么？他为什么这么做？一切都运转如意 Why? Why did he do it? Everything was going so well.
我是谁 精神病医师吗？也许他不快乐吧 What, am I a headshrinker? Maybe the man was unhappy.
他并不像不快乐的样子 He didn't look unhappy.
- 他不像个有钱人 - 他不是可以轻易形容的人 - He didn't look rich. - He was never an easy man to figure out.
他白手起家创立了这公司 He built this company with his bare hands.
每个步骤都步步为营… Every step he took was a step up...
当然 除了这最后的一次 except, of course, this last one.
他是个了不起的家伙… Sure, sure he was a swell fella...
可当这位总裁主席 but when the president, chairman of the board...
以及87%股票所有者坠下… and owner of 87 percent of the company stock drops...
- 44楼时… - 45楼 - 44 floors... - Forty-five.
把中层楼算进去 Counting the mezzanine.
那这个公司也就有麻烦了 斯蒂尔森 Then the company, too, has a problem. Stillson!
沃林的股票确切是怎么分配的？ What exactly is the disposition of Waring's stock?
如你所知… Well, as you know...
赫德没有家庭也没有遗嘱 Hud left no will and no family.
公司法对这种事件有非常清楚的叙述 The company bylaws are quite clear in that event.
"从他死后的第一个财政年度起…" "His entire portfolio will be converted into common stock...
"他的所有有价证券都将成为普通股…" and will be sold over the counter as of the first of the fiscal year...
- "并通过经济人出售" - 什么意思？ - following his demise." - Meaning?
很简单沃林的股票和对公司的支配权… Meaning simply that Waring's stock and control of the company...
将在1月1日对公众开放 will be made available to the public January 1st.
你的意思是说… Do you mean to say...
任何一个穿着臭汗衫的流氓 都能去买赫德萨克的股票？ that any slob in a smelly T-shirt will be able to buy Hudsucker stock?
公司法写得很清楚 The company bylaws are quite clear.
天哪 你们这些畜生 My God! You're animals!
你们怎么能在他刚从45楼跳下后 就马上讨论他的股票 How can you discuss his stock when the man has just leapt 45 floors?
- 44楼 - 不算中层楼 - Forty four. - Not counting the mezzanine.
别演戏了 艾迪尔森 故人已逝 Quit showboating, Addison. The man is gone.
现在的问题是我们是否会让某某人在这里跳华尔滋… The question now is whether we'll let John Q. Public waltz in here...
并买下我们的公司 - 你在暗示什么？ and buy our company. - What are you suggesting, Sydney?
我们肯定没有能力买下控股权 Certainly we can't afford to buy a controlling interest.
当然不会在股票如此坚挺的时候 Not while the stock is this strong.
赫德的证券什么时候投入市场？ How soon before Hud's paper hits the market?
- 1月1日 - 还有30天 - January 1st. - Thirty days.
- 4个星期 - 最多一个月 - Four weeks. - A month at the most.
用一个月来使本世纪的高额投资… One month to make the blue-chip investment of the century...
变得像泰坦尼克号的双程船票 look like a round-trip ticket on the Titanic.
我们大肆宣传赫德的死讯 We play up the fact that Hud is dead.
赫德万岁 Long live the Hud!
- 我们压低股价 - 直到我们可以买下50% - We depress the stock. - To the point where we can buy 50 percent.
- 51% - 不算中层楼 - Fifty one. - Not counting the mezzanine.
- 这可能有用 - 这应该有用 - It could work. - It should work.
- 这将会有用 - 这已经有用了 - It would work. - It's working already.
沃林·赫德萨克是麦迪逊大街的抽象艺术 Waring Hudsucker is abstract art on Madison Avenue.
我们现在需要的是一个 能引起股东们恐慌的新总裁 What we need now is a new president who will inspire panic in the stockholder.
- 一个傀儡 - 一个代理人 - A puppet. - A proxy.
一个走卒 A pawn.
当然 某个可以… Sure, sure, some jerk...
任由我们摆布的笨蛋 we can really push around.
你必须每天早上8:30来上班打卡 You punch in at 8:30 every morning,
一个商务假期之后就是早上7:30打卡… at 7:30 following a business holiday...
除非是星期一 那就8:00来 unless it's a Monday, then you punch in 8:00.
- 打卡晚了他们就扣你薪水 - 快7点了 赶快 - Punch in late and they dock you. - This goes to seven! Urgent.
进来的物品要拿到一份凭单 外出的物品要提供一份凭单 Incoming articles get a voucher. Outgoing articles provide a voucher.
没有凭单而移动任何一样物品 他们就扣你薪水 Move any article without a voucher and they dock you!
把这个送到三楼的秘书处 尽快 Take this up to the secretarial pool on three! ASAP!
信件尺寸的绿色凭单 文件尺寸的黄色凭单 Letter-size, a green voucher! Folder-size, a yellow voucher!
- 包裹尺寸的栗色凭单 - 这是给莫加罗斯的 赶快 - Parcel-size, a maroon voucher! - This is for Morgatross! Chop-chop!
混淆了凭单颜色他们就扣你薪水 Wrong color voucher and they dock you!
6- 7- 8- 7- 0- 4- 9- Alpha- 6 6-7-8-7-0-4-9-Alpha-6!
这是你的职工号 不会再重复第二遍 That is your employee number! It will not be repeated!
没有它你就无法兑现薪水支票 Without your employee number you cannot get your paycheck.
送到27楼 All right, this goes up to 27!
带弃权声明回来 别带没签过字的弃权声明回来 Return a waiver! Do not return without a signed waiver!
各办公室之间邮件的编码是37 Inter-office mail is code 37!
办公室内部邮件的编码是37-3 Intra-office mail is 37-3.
外部邮件的编码3-37 Outside mail is 3-37.
弄错编码他们就扣你薪水 Code it wrong and they dock you!
我本应该在10分钟前把这个送到28楼 I was supposed to have this on 2810 minutes ago!
这就是对你的定位 This has been your orientation.
你还什么地方不清楚的吗？ Is there anything you do not understand or understand partially?
如果没有被完全定位好 你肯定会提出申诉 If you have not been fully orientated, you must file a complaint with Personnel!
提出错误的申诉他们就扣你薪水 File a faulty complaint and they dock you!
克劳皮特 克劳皮特克劳皮特克劳皮特克劳皮特… Kloppitt. Kloppitt, Kloppitt...
马克斯克劳皮特 Max Kloppitt.
"小马克斯·克劳皮特" "Max Kloppitt, Jr."
如果信封比信箱大的话你会怎么做？ What do you do when the envelope is too big for the slot?
嗯 如果你折叠了 他们就会开除你 Well, if you fold them, they fire you.
我通常把它们扔掉 I usually throw them out.
- 今天刚上班 - 唔 - Just got hired today. - Mm-hm.
- 恐怖 - 你懂的 新手 - Terrific. - You know, entry level.
给我说说 Tell me about it.
不过… 我有个妙计 But I got big ideas.
我深信不疑 I'm sure you do.
例如… 看看这可爱的小东西 For instance, take a look at this sweet baby.
我自己研究的 I developed it myself.
没错先生 这将是我发迹的法宝 Yes, sirree, this is my ticket upstairs.
你知道 给孩子们的 You know, for kids.
恐怖 Terrific.
你看 我不会在邮件室长待的 So you see, I won't be working in the mail room long.
是的 我猜你也不会 No, I don't guess you will be.
- 你在这里干多久了？ - 48年 - How long you been here? - Forty-eight years.
明年如果够幸运的话我就会调去… 收包裹 Next year they move me up to parcels if I'm lucky.
赫德萨克的员工们注意 Attention Hudsucker employees!
赫德萨克的员工们注意: Attention Hudsucker employees!
我们遗憾地宣布在赫德萨克时间… We regretfully announce that at 30 seconds after the hour of noon...
午时30秒… Hudsucker time...
沃林·赫德萨克这位赫德萨克企业董事会的… Waring Hudsucker, founder, president...
奠基者总裁及董事长… and chairman of the board of Hudsucker Industries...
与世长辞 merged with the infinite.
为了纪念这一共同打击… To mark this occasion of corporate loss...
我们要求所有员工哀悼片刻 we ask that all employees observe a moment of silent contemplation.
谢谢各位善意的举动 Thank you for your kind attention.
这一刻将被适时地记录到你们的时间卡里… This moment has been duly noted on your timecards...
并从你们的薪水中扣除 完毕 and will be deducted from your pay. That is all.
- 蓝色信件 - 蓝色信件 - Blue letter! - Blue letter!
他们拿来一封蓝色信件 They're bringing down a blue letter!
是蓝色信件 It's a blue letter.
最最高级别的 Top, top level.
大人物之间的私人交流 Confidential communication between the brass.
通常是坏消息 Usually bad news.
他们痛恨把蓝色信件送上去 They hate blue letters upstairs.
- 痛恨他们 - 你 - Hate them. - You!
对就是你 巴恩斯 你看起来不是很忙 Yeah, you! Barnes! You don't look busy!
你应该可以处理蓝色信念吧？ Think you can handle a blue letter?
这封信是早上由大人物 亲自寄来的 This letter was sent this morning by the big man himself...
沃林·赫德萨克 没错就是他 that's right, Waring Hudsucker!
要送给席德·穆斯伯格 这位赫德萨克的得力助手 It's addressed to Sid Mussburger, Hudsucker's right-hand man!
是蓝色信件 It's a blue letter!
这意味着你必须把它无误地交到穆斯伯格手中 That means you got to put it right in Mussburger's hands.
不能找秘书 不能找接待员 No secretaries! No receptionists!
不能找同事 不能找借口 No colleagues! No excuses!
穆斯伯格 Mussburger!
嗨 伙计 我叫巴兹 我爱没事找事 我能让电梯自行其事 Hi, my name's Buzz, I got the fuzz, I make the elevator do what she does.
举着晾干 想去哪儿 伙计？ Hang it up to dry. What's your pleasure, buddy?
- 44楼 - 44楼 最高领导人那层 - Forty-four. - Forty-four, the top-brass floor.
说说看伙计… 什么东西用了50年上到顶层 Say, buddy, what takes 50 years to get to the top floor...
又用了30秒下来？ and 30 seconds to get down?
是沃林·赫德萨克 你猜到了吗 伙计？ Waring Hudsucker! You get it, buddy?
说说看伙计 克莱恩先生到9楼 戴尔小姐到人事部 Say, buddy! Mr. Kline, up to nine. Mrs. Dell, Personnel.
- 列文先生到37楼 - 36楼 - Mr. Levin, 37. - Thirty-six.
那就走下去 女士们先生们请往后移 Walk down! Ladies and gentlemen, please step to the rear.
- 巨人格里尔先生来了 - 巴兹 - Here comes the gargantuan Mr. Grier. - Buzz.
说说看 伙计 谁是街上最"善变"的商人？ Say, buddy, who's the most liquid businessman on the street?
是沃林·赫德萨克 伙计 Waring Hudsucker. Say, buddy.
什么时候人行道盛装打扮？当它穿上赫德萨克 哈哈哈 When is the sidewalk fully dressed? When it's wearing Hudsucker! Ha-ha-ha.
你猜出来了吗？伙计 这是双关语 很好玩的笑话 You get it, buddy? It's a pun, it's a knee-slapper...
是耶稣约瑟和圣玛丽亚之间的一种游戏… it's a play on... Jesus, Joseph and Mary,
那是蓝色信件吗？ is that a blue letter?
你怎么不早说？大家抓紧了 现在急升到顶层 Why didn't you tell a guy? Hold on, folks, we're express to the top floor!
祝你好运 伙计 Good luck, buddy.
你会需要的 You're gonna need it. Ha-ha-ha.
是穆斯伯格先生的办公室吗？ Mr. Mussburger's office?
你好 Hello.
- 你有预约吗？ - 没有… - Do you have an appointment? - No.
- 我们来看看登记本 好吗？ - 可能我… - Shall we look in the book? Hmm? - Ma'am, we shall...
- 好像没有登记 - 是没有 - We don't seem to be in the book. - I wouldn't be.
如果有预约的话 我们会登记的 If we had an appointment, we'd be in the book.
我有一封… I have this, uh...
哦 在这里 Oh, here it is. Heh.
根博茨？ Gambotz?
哈利·根博茨？ Harry Gambotz?
不 太冒险了 他虽是新手可并不迟钝 No, too risky. He's green but he's not slow.
他是谁？ Who is he?
不 我要的是一个低能儿 而不是无名小卒 不然就让你来做 No, I want an imbecile, not a cipher or you'd have the job.
他被调去做套圈和O环 They moved him to grommets and O-rings.
干得相当不错 He's doing pretty well.
不行 麦克兰纳汉不行 No, no, not, McClanahan.
他把特力雅合并的事情搞砸了 所以需要点东西来证明 He bungled the Teleyard merger, thinks he's got something to prove.
谁让你进来的？ Who let you in?
是阿特沃特？我上个星期就该解雇他 Atwater? Tremendous. Except I just fired him last week.
穆斯伯格先生… Mr. Mussburger...
邦斯德在楼下等您 Mr. Bumstead's waiting downstairs.
- 我马上去 - 好的 穆斯伯格先生 - I'll be right there. - Yes, Mr. Mussburger.
请说吧 Spit it out!
- 我 额… - 耶？ - I, uh... - Yeah?
你可能是这公司最大的白痴 Well, maybe you're the company's biggest moron.
我们不能用莫里斯 他在这里很久了 We can't use Morris. Been here too long.
是个好人也有很多朋友 He's a nice guy with too many friends.
事实上你为什么不解雇他？涂掉 我会解雇他的 In fact, why don't you fire him? Scratch that, I'll fire him.
要快 快 Make it fast, huh, fast!
邦斯德先生有点不耐烦了 Mr. Bumstead is growing restless.
告诉他我马上到给他本杂志 Tell him I'll be right there. Give him a magazine.
你是什么东西 哑巴吗？ What, are you a mute?
股票怎么样？很糟？ How's the stock doing? Bad?
嗯 还不够糟 听着笨蛋 Well, it's not bad enough. Listen, chump.
一旦你发现我在唠叨 或是把你的钥匙扔进董事长厕所 Either you find me a ding-dong or tender your key to the executive washroom.
那就意味着有人接替你了 伙计 埃克雷？奥德盖 That goes double for you, pal. Ear-clay? Ood-gay!
最好是好消息我心情不好 This better be good. I'm in a bad mood.
先生我有些来自邮件房的东西要给您 不过首先… Sir, I've got something for you from the mail room, but first...
是否可以占用您宝贵的几分钟 看些东西… if I could take a minute of your very valuable time to show you something...
我可花了两至三年的工夫 I've been working on for the past two or three years.
您知道给孩子们的 You know, for kids.
这对赫德萨克来说非常理想 It's perfect for Hudsucker,
倒不是因为我是什么伟大的天才 not that I'm any great genius.
有人说灵感来自99%的努力 They say inspiration is 99 percent perspiration...
而对于我来说至少是两倍… in my case it's at least twice that...
- 不过我必须要告诉您先生… - 等一下 - but I've got to tell you, this sweet... - Wait a minute!
坐下孩子 Sit down, son.
去吧 Go ahead.
试试看 Try it on.
把脚放上来 Put your feet up.
放上来 Go ahead.
我们来互相认识一下 怎么样？ Let's get to know one another, shall we?
我们来次… Let's chat.
男人之间的交谈 Man-to-man.
你出身卑微是吗？ Now then, you're from the basement, aren't you?
而且没受过多少… And weren't blessed with much...
教育？ education?
嗯 我是个大学毕业生 Well, I am a college graduate.
但你成绩平庸 But you did not excel in your studies.
- 嗯 我是曼希… - 哦 - Well, I... I made Dean's List. - Oh.
工商管理大学的优等生 At the Muncie College of Business Administration.
你的朋友们都叫你"笨蛋"对吗？ And your friends, they called you "jerk," didn't they?
唔 Mm, unh-uhn.
- "傻瓜？" "混蛋？" - 唔 不是 - "Dope?" "Dipstick?" - Mm-mm. No.
"呆子？""蠢货？" 在你背后也没有叫？ "Lamebrain?" "Schmo?" Not even behind your back?
我被公认为是"最接近成功的人" Well, as a matter they voted me "Most Likely to Succeed."
你被解雇了 You're fired.
把你的脚从我的桌子上拿开 滚出去 Get your feet off my desk, get out of my office.
把你的围裙放在衣帽间 Leave your apron in the locker room.
哦 天哪 Oh, my God!
邦斯德的合同 我可为此辛苦了四年 The Bumstead contract. I've been working on that deal for four years!
滚出去 我会处理的 Get out of here! I'll take care of it! Get out.
你可能破坏了我职业生涯中最敏感的文件 You could have destroyed the most sensitive document of my career.
邦斯德先生威胁说要离开 Mr. Bumstead is threatening to leave the building.
我正下楼呢 I'm on my way down.
我们要依照副本重新打印合同的第一页 这样才合法 We need the first page of the contract retyped.
是 穆斯伯格先生 Yes, Mr. Mussburger.
耶？额 耶 Yeah? Uh-huh. Yeah.
出去 滚出去 Out! Out of the office!
跌了三个点？ Down three points, huh?
值得嘉奖纽约怎么样了？ That's encouraging. How about New York?
不是这边 从门那边 Not that way, through the door!
重新打印邦斯德的合同需要三小时 Sir, it'll take three hours to retype the Bumstead contract...
你要去哪儿？滚出去 打住 Where are you going? Get out of here! Stop that!
邦斯德先生威胁要走 Mr. Bumstead's threatening to leave.
不是整份合同 只要第一页 Not the whole contract, just the first page.
我马上来再给他一份杂志 I'll be there. Give him another magazine.
- 他说他要走了 - 我说过我马上到 - He says he'll leave. - I said I'll be there!
而且你妻子正在试图接近你 And you're wife's been trying to reach you.
用你的脚站起来 我们不能在赫德萨克企业里爬来爬去 Up on your feet! We don't crawl here at Hudsucker Industries!
- 我的脚着火了 - 没有假设 - My leg is on fire! - No assumptions!
现在还早我只想知道收市时我们的位置 It's early yet. Just let me know where we stand at the closing bell.
哦天哪 邦斯德的合同 Oh, my God, the Bumstead contract!
不要杂志 不要咖啡 No magazines! No coffee!
穆斯伯格 我要见穆斯伯格 除非他也从窗口跳下去了？ Mussburger! I wanna see Mussburger! Or did he jump out a window too?
别担心 穆斯伯格先生 我抓住你了 我抓住你的裤子了 Don't worry, Mr. Mussburger, I got you! I got you by your pants.
裤子？ Pants?
穆斯伯格先生 我要用精细的双针来缝你的裤子 Mr. Mussburger, I'm gonna give your pants a nice double stitch.
这样更结实而且让你更有型 It'll make them real strong and you're gonna look real sharp.
- 不用 单针很好 - 可双针更耐久 - No, single stitch is fine. - But the double stitch, she lasts forever.
我要双针到底什么用？ Why on earth would I want a double stitch?
给你垫帐吗？ To pad your account.
单针就好了 Single stitch is fine.
该死 Damn!
什么鬼东西 穆斯伯格先生人这么好… Oh, what the heck! Mr. Mussburger is such a nice man...
无论如何我也要给他缝双针 I'm gonna give him a double stitch anyway. Heh-heh-heh.
这样缝结实 的确如此 Ah. That's some strong stitch, you bet!
"企业的爱因斯坦" "The Einstein of Enterprise."
"产业的爱迪生" "The Edison of Industry."
"价值连城的头脑" "The Billion-Dollar Cranium!"
"智多星" "Idea Man!"
可你们没有一个人能告诉我他的故事 And not one of you has given me a story on him!
一群笨蛋 Bunch of lamebrains!
事实画像图表 他们一张报纸也卖不出去 Facts, figures, charts. They never sold a newspaper!
我看了今天早上的阿耳戈斯报 告诉你们: I read this morning's Argus, let me tell you something.
我把它包鱼了 我用它来点火 I'd wrap a fish in it! I'd use it as kindling!
我会用这张报纸训练我的狗 如果它不是 I'd train my poodle on it if he wasn't a French poodle...
法国狮子狗而且偏爱巴黎日报 and partial to pages of Paris-Soir.
我不会花一个子儿去看这种东西 But I wouldn't shell out a hard-earned nickel to read the thing!
拜托 头儿让我们休息一下 Come on, chief, give us a break.
当然 提比斯 休息一下 Sure, Tibbs. Take a break.
去佛罗里达躺在阳光下 Go to Florida. Lie in the sun.
等着椰子掉下来 就编个这样的故事吧 Wait for a coconut to drop. File a story on it.
比你写的乡村粮食过剩强多了 It'd be more of a grabber than your piece on the county grain surplus!
人的角度 这才是卖点 The human angle! That's what sells papers!
我们需要一份精华性的头版 那个智多星就可以 We need a front page with a heart and the Idea Man can put it there!
如果我们有更多的门路… Look, chief, if we had more access...
如果青蛙有翅膀 它就不会噘着屁股蹦来蹦去了 If a frog had wings it wouldn't bump it's ass a-hopping.
我不想听借口 我要成果 I don't want excuses, I want results!
那个智多星的嗜好是什么？他从哪里来的？ What makes the Idea Man tick? Where's he from?
我想知道有关他的一切 他有女朋友吗？他有双亲吗？ I want to know everything about him! Has he got a girl? Has he got parents?
每个人都有双亲 Everybody has parents.
没错可有几个呢？ All right, how many?
怎么样帕金森？你沉默很久了 How about it, Parkinson? You've been awful quiet over there.
- 额… - 深水不扬波 - Uh... - Still waters run deep.
帕金森身上唯一深的是他的耳洞 Only thing deep with Parkinson are the holes in his ears.
对 智多星 Yes, Idea Man.
他的梦想是什么？他的欲望是什么？ What are his hopes and dreams, his desires and aspirations?
他整天都在思考还是在特定的时间？ Does he think all the time or a certain portion of the day?
他有多高？鞋子是多少尺码？他睡在哪里？ How tall is he? Shoe size? Where does he sleep?
他早餐吃什么？ What does he have for breakfast?
他会不会在烤面包上涂果酱？ Does he put jam on his toast or doesn't he?
如果不那为什么不？又是从什么时候开始的？ If not, why not and since when?
喂？ Well?
你们这帮废物 Ah. You're useless.
嗯 智多星 "创造者" Yes. Idea Man. "Creator."
"改革者" "思索者" "Innovator." "Cerebrator."
- 冒牌货 - 嗯？ - Fake! - Huh?
我来告诉你 那家伙是个冒牌货 I tell you, the guy's a phony.
- 冒牌货？ - 就像一张3美元的钞票 - Phony, huh? - As a three-dollar bill.
- 谁说的？ - 我说的 艾蜜·阿尔切 - Says who? - Says me, Amy Archer!
凭什么说他是智多星？因为赫德萨克这么说过？ Why is he an Idea Man? Because Hudsucker says he is?
他的点子是什么？为什么任何人都不能采访他？ What are his ideas? Why can't anyone interview him?
我赌5美元她会提她普利策奖 Five bucks says she mentions her Pulitzer.
还来？你自愿的 Again? You're on.
看这家伙的嘴脸 Just take a look at the mug on this guy.
突出的眉毛猿人似的前额 白痴的笑容 The jutting eyebrows, the simian forehead, the idiotic grin.
他长着一幅只有妈妈才会喜欢面孔… 还是在发工资那天 He has a face only a mother could love on payday.
现在唯一的故事就是 这个家伙怎么愚弄你的？艾尔 The only story here is how this guy made a monkey out of you, Al.
不论如何 我仍是这份小报的主编 Yeah, monkey or not, I'm still editor of this rag.
我想你正在写"J·艾德加胡佛:他何时结婚？" You were doing the piece on the FBI. "Hoover: When Will He Marry?"
- 我昨天就上交了 领带不错 艾尔 - 好 那就写续篇 - I filed it yesterday. Nice tie, Earl. - Well, do a follow-up.
"胡佛:警探或娘娘腔？" "Hoover: Crime Buster or Pantywaist?"
你们剩下的这些笨蛋多用点脑子 The rest of you mugs get off your brains
给我找点智多星的故事回来 and get me that Idea Man story!
艾尔 他是骗人的 Al, he's the bunk.
- 我敢用我的普利策奖打赌 - 唔 - I'll stake my Pulitzer on it! - Hmm.
说说看 伙计 你从哪儿搞到这身新行头的？ Say, buddy, where'd you get the new duds?
嗨伙计 那个水桶屁股 怎么会喜欢蓝色信件的？ Say, buddy, how did old bucket butt like his blue letter? Heh.
他气爆了吗？他死了吗？哦你好 穆斯伯格先生 Did he bust a gut? Did he die? Well, hello, Mr. Mussburger.
- 大厅 我们没有这么多时间 - 马上 穆斯伯格先生 - Lobby, we haven't got all day. - Right away, Mr. Mussburger.
多好的早晨您过得如何 先生？ How are you this fine morning, sir?
今天能为您服务非常荣幸 穆斯伯格先生 It's been a pleasure serving you today, sir.
能为你服务也非常荣幸 伙计 It's been a pleasure serving you too, uh, buddy.
额 席德 我们是否该稍微关心一下 Uh, Sid, shouldn't we be a little concerned...
股票在过去几天里的… 下滑趋势？ with the downward spiral of our stock these past few days?
我知道你是老手 可在曼希大学的工商… You're the expert, but at the Muncie College...
别紧张 这很正常… Relax, it's only natural...
在过渡期很多胆小鬼都跑去找庇护了 in a period of transition for the more timid element to run for cover.
正如我所说 你是老手 Like I said, you're the expert...
不过你是否记得我向你概述的计划… but do you remember the plan I outlined for you...
我烧了你的… 我被提升的那天所描述的计划？ the day I set fire to your office? The day I was promoted?
我当然记得而且被深深打动 不过现在全忘了 I do remember and I was impressed. But that's all forgotten now.
谢谢 席德 Oh. Thank you, Sid.
我提及这个的原因是因为 这需要一小部分的资金总额… The reason I mention it is it requires such a small capital investment...
同样的 你是这儿的老手 Again, you are the expert here.
但是壮大的中产阶级会 But there's such an enormous potential profit...
会赋予其巨大的潜在利润 given the discretionary income of the burgeoning middle-class.
所以只要你同意 我会在午餐时试探少数人对这创意的看法 So if you agree, I'd like to bounce the idea off a few people at lunch.
当然可以 Sure, sure.
你想告诉谁都可以 我也想听听一些要点 Tell whoever you want. I'd like to hear about it at some point too.
- 我得到了享受 本尼 - 耶 给我说说看 - I got gas, Benny. - Yeah. Tell me about it.
不开玩笑 本尼 我得到了享受 No kidding, Benny. I got gas.
- 挺特别的？ - 远不止这样 - You get the special? - Far from it.
来了一位夫人 Enter the dame.
每个故事里都有这么一位 There's one in every story.
10美元赌她是来寻求施舍的 Ten bucks says she's looking for a handout.
20美元赌她在这里找不到 Twenty bucks says not here, she don't find one.
- 她在找她的目标 - 她找到了他 - She's looking for her mark. - She finds him.
她坐了下来并要了… 一份简单的午餐 She sits down and orders a light lunch.
她准备怎么付帐？ How will she pay for this lunch?
- 她翻了翻她的钱包 - 没钱 - She looks through her purse. - No money.
目标察觉到了 The mark notices.
- 他没察觉 本尼 - 也许他比较聪明 - He's not noticing, Benny. - Maybe he's wise.
他看起来可不聪明 He don't look wise.
方案二 Plan two.
眼泪登场了 Here come the waterworks.
- 《黄石公园》 - 《老实泉》 - Yellowstone. - Old Faithful.
《你好尼亚加拉河》 Hello, Niagara.
- 他察觉到了 - 她很忧伤 - He notices. - She's distressed.
他关心了起来 He's concerned.
她诉说她的困境 She explains her predicament.
以及… 简易午餐来了 And enter the light lunch.
- 她当然还有其他的困难 - 家人重病 - She's got other problems. - There's illness in the family.
- 母亲需要动手术 - 很紧急 - Her mother needs an operation. - Urgently.
- 腺状肿大 - 不 本尼 - Adenoids. - No, Benny.
腰痛 Lumbago.
这骗局把老人扯上了 That gag's got whiskers on it.
哦 他并不上钩 本尼 Uh-oh. He ain't biting, Benny.
- 她要失手了 鲁 - 也许他比较聪明 - She's losing him, Lou. - Maybe he's wise.
他看起来可不聪明 He don't look wise.
- 她要怎样摆脱困境？ - 他要走了 - How does she pull this out? - He's getting away.
- 她最好快点想好 - 她没有 - She better think fast. - She isn't.
她想到了 She is!
她真棒 本尼 She's good, Benny.
她真他妈的棒 鲁 She's damn good, Lou.
你们这些家伙还要些别的东西吗？ Can I get you boys anything else?
- 镇静剂 - 镇静剂 - Bromo. - Bromo.
不好意思我们只能走楼梯 管电梯的是个可怕的家伙 I'm sorry we had to take the stairs. It was just that horrible elevator boy.
我无法表达我有多么感激你能倾听我的故事 I can't say how much I appreciate your listening to my story.
在这扰攘的城市里能找到一位 勇敢而耐心的人是何其幸运 I'm lucky to find someone in this bustling city with a stout heart and a ready ear.
不管怎样 我曾旅行穿越这个伟大的国家 At any rate, there I was traveling this great country.
所遇到的有些人很友善 有些非常粗鲁 Some I met were kind to me, others exceedingly cruel.
坐过公共汽车火车甚至搭顺风车… Traveling by motor bus, rail, even by thumb.
椅子 谢谢 The couch, please.
存下每1元 攒下每1分 省下每1子 Hoarding every dollar, counting every nickel, pinching every penny.
这里到楼下的咖啡店有点远 It's been a long road leading to the coddee shop downstairs.
但我不会用其间的1天 1小时 1分钟来换别的东西 Not that I'd trade a day, an hour, a moment of it for anything.
我不知道什么自己怎么了 I don't know what came over me.
我猜可能是这么久没有戒除酶之后… It was the shock of eating after so long...
突然的一顿饭… without the enzymes kicking in after so long...
你不可能知道我有多么的疲惫与饥饿 Then you couldn't possibly know what it is to be tired and hungry.
- 总之很饿 - 我并不想让 - Hungry, anyway. - I don't wanna bore you...
我的生活琐事烦扰你 这不愉快 with all details of my life. Not a happy story.
只要说我没工作就够了 但不意味着我需要磨练 I'm jobless but not for want of trying.
我举目无亲无依无靠而 又不合时宜地出现… I'm friendless, with no one to take care of me and had you not come along...
- 就在你要… - 我我自己… - exactly when you did... - I, myself...
总之 我10天前来到这城市… At any rate, I arrived in town not 10 days ago...
满怀梦想急切 想闯出一番名堂… full of dreams and aspirations, anxious to make my way in the world...
可能有点天真谢谢 a little naive perhaps...
但是满怀信心… 要找一份稳定合法的工作 but armed with determination, work ethic...
并对未来抱着坚定的信念… and a belief in the future...
- 我我自己… - 没想这种信念… - I, myself... - Only to have that belief...
如此纯洁的乐观精神会在车间里碰壁 that unsullied optimism, dashed against the marble of the workplace.
但我觉得这就是生活 探索就能得到努力就能成功 Such is life. Seek and you shall find. Work and you shall prosper.
- 抽烟吗？ - 不谢谢 - Cigarette? - No, thank you.
探索就能得到 努力就能成功 Seek and you shall find, work and you shall prosper.
这是格言 我所接受的道德教育… These were the watchwords of my education...
是我在某个… the values instilled in me...
你从未听说过的小镇 从小到大被灌输的价值观 while I was growing up in a little town you've never heard of.
- 我可以来一杯吗？ - 请随便 - Mind if I join you? - Be my guest.
一个你从未听说过的小镇… A little town you've probably never heard of...
一个你从未听说过的积满灰尘的十字路口 a dusty crossroads of which you've probably never heard.
对不起去董事厕所 Excuse me. Executive washroom.
你没事吧？ Are you all right?
是你的午餐作怪吗？鸡肉？ Is it your lunch? The chicken à la king?
- 是那种味道吗？ - 不 我很好 你在说什么？ - Is the à la king repeating on you? - No, I'm fine. You were saying?
额… Uh...
价值观 格言 童年 Values, watchwords, tender years.
一个你可能从未听说过的小镇: A town you've probably never heard of.
曼希 印第安那 Muncie, Indiana.
- 你是从曼希来的？ - 是啊 怎么啦 你知道吗？ - You're from Muncie? - Why, yes. Do you know it?
额 Uh... Uhn!
继续战斗 Fight on
继续战斗 亲爱的老曼希 Fight on Dear old Muncie
继续战斗 Fight on
为了金蓝旗的升起 Hoist the gold and blue
"你将衣衫褴褛 受尽折磨与伤害" You'll be tattered Torn and hurting
"当曼希与你…" Once the Muncie's done with
共雄起 You
- 展翅高飞… - 展翅高飞 - Go, Eagles! - Go, Eagles!
一个曼希的姑娘 A Muncie girl!
- 你了解多少？ - 唔 - What do you know about that? - Hmm.
我想告诉你 艾蜜 I'll tell you what, Amy.
我要取消今天的剩下的约会… I'm gonna cancel the rest of my appointments...
然后给你在这里就在赫德找份工作 and get you a job here at Hud.
哦不用了 真的… Oh, no! Really...
不用谢我 这很简单 我知道哪儿刚好有个空缺 Don't bother to thank me. It's easy. I know where a vacancy just came up.
- 邮件房 只花一点时间 - 耶 - Mailroom. This will only take a moment. - Yeah.
下午好 我是诺维尔·巴恩斯 Good afternoon, this is Norville Barnes.
巴恩斯 你到底去哪儿了？ Barnes! Where the hell have you been?
- 我的凭单呢？ - 唔 - Where's my voucher? - Um...
- 我不能确定在哪儿 - 我需要凭单 - I'm not sure. - I need that voucher!
一星期之前我就告诉过你这很重要 I told you a week ago it was important!
额 我现在是公司的总裁 Ahem, I'm president of the company now.
我才不管你是否是公司的总裁 I don't care if you're president of the company!
我现在需要的是凭单 I need the voucher now!
嗯 不如在这里和我一起工作吧？ Look, why don't you work in here with me?
你熟悉打印机吗？ Are you familiar with the mimeograph machine?
是的 当然 我上过曼希的秘书专业学校 Well, of course. I went to the Muncie Secretarial, uh, Polytechnic.
一个曼希的姑娘 真想不到 A Muncie girl! Can you beat that?
我只是不知道该如何感谢你 巴恩斯先生 I just don't know how to thank you, Mr. Barnes.
请叫我诺维尔 Please, Norville.
- 展翅高飞 - 展翅高飞 - Go, Eagles! Heh. - Go, Eagles!
"当曼希…" 圣草显灵吧 "Once the Munce..." Holy moly!
那个家伙是从傻瓜城出来的吗？我甚至照常扯出我的老妈妈 Is this guy from Chumpsville? I even pulled the old mother routine.
- 腺状肿大？ - 腰痛 - Adenoids? - Lumbago.
呸 这个骗局把老人扯上了 Phew. That gag's got whiskers on it.
我告诉你赫德萨克董事会肯定在搞什么事 I tell you, the Hudsucker board's up to something.
形容视丘下部痛苦的2个字单词是什么？ What's a six-letter word for an affliction of the hypothalamus?
- 这很肯定 高特 - 这家伙肯定不知内情 - And it's a cinch... Goiter. - This guy isn't in on it.
- 她就在这儿 - 安排最新的末版还有多少时间？ - She's right here. - How much time to make the late final?
- 头儿 - 嗨头儿 - Chief. - Tsk. Hiya, chief.
我只想对你说抱歉 Just the person I wanted to apologize to.
- 差不多7分钟 - 耶 对于你的智多星 我完全搞错了 - About seven minutes. - Yeah, I was all wet about your Idea Man.
哦 谢谢海涵 在凡人中你是如此神圣 Well, thanks for being so generous. It is human and you are divine.
不 他不是个冒牌货 No, he's no faker.
他是个100%的真品 谨防假冒童叟无欺 He's 100 percent real McCoy, beware of imitations, genuine article.
如果用三个字来形容的话 这家伙是个真正的"低能儿" The guy's a real moron, as in a five-letter word for imbecile.
我碰到过的最纯粹的标本 好的 Oh, as pure a specimen as I've ever run across. Okay.
如果我不是个中老手… If working at the Argus doesn't make me an expert...
那我就不叫艾蜜·阿尔切 也从未得过普利策奖 then my name isn't Amy Archer and I never won the Pulitzer Prize.
在1957 In 1957.
我的 额 我的三胞胎重逢系列 My, oh, my series on the reunited triplets.
就会出来了 蠢蛋 你会见识到的 Well, come down here, hammerhead, and I'll show it to you!
形容不能飞的鸟的3个字母单词是什么？ What's a three-letter word for a flightless bird?
现在不行 我正忙 Not now, I'm busy.
是的 我说过"蠢蛋"是用来形容 Right, I said, "hammerhead," as in a 10-letter word for a smug...
自大又盛气凌人的报业者的2个字单词 bullying newspaper man.
是角马G-N-U 谁不会发现… 那是G-N-U Gnu. Who couldn't find... That's G-N-U.
用罗盘地图和向导也无法找到 纽约州大厦的人 Couldn't find the Empire State Building with a compass, map and a guide.
或者是鸸鹋？那只是马铃薯 这才是肉汤 Or is it Emu? That's just potatoes. Here comes the gravy.
那个笨蛋真的很喜欢我 The chump really likes me.
- 一个曼希的姑娘 - 最好别爱上蛇蝎美人 - Ah. A Muncie girl! - Better off falling for a rattlesnake.
这家伙是个替罪羊 我要找出为何如此 This guy's just a patsy and I'm gonna find out what for.
这里面有个真正的故事 某种阴谋… There's a real story here, some kind of plot.
一种安排 哦 另外 我告诉过你吗？ A set-up. Oh, and say, did I tell you?
- 他没有为你提供资金？ - 1张10元钞票 - He didn't odder you money? - A sawbuck!
10张1元的 我们去搭快车吧 Ten smackers! Let's grab a highball!
- 去找诺维尔·巴恩斯 - 耶 - On Norville Barnes. - Yeah.
复印 Copy!
史密斯小组可否进来拿封信？ Ms. Smith, would you come in and take a letter?
所有这些无聊的… Of all the cockamamy...
你看了今天的曼哈顿阿耳戈斯报的头版吗？ Did you see the front page of today's Manhattan Argus?
我没有费心去读这篇文章 我并不认为这是张准确的照片 Well, I, uh, didn't bother to read the article. I didn't think the picture did you justice.
照片很好 Well, the picture's fine.
问题是下方那个愚蠢女人写的东西 It's what that knuckle-headed dame wrote underneath.
所有这些不负责的… 把这个记下来 Of all the irresponsible... Take this down.
亲爱的阿尔切小姐: Dear, Ms. Archer.
我称你为"小姐"是因为你好像已经完全地"错过"了渡船 I call you "Miss" because you seem to have missed the boat completely.
在你还没胆量对我进行私人采访前… How would you know if I'm an imbecile?
怎么知道我是否是个低能儿 You didn't have the guts to come interview me man-to-man!
把"私人"换成"面对面" Change "man-to-man" to "face-to-face."
不 把"面对面"改成"双目相对" 把"胆量"改成"应有的庄重" Change "face-to-face" to "eye-to-eye" and "guts" to "common decency."
这些对于我的智商的野蛮猜测… These wild speculations about my intelligence...
这些荒谬的造词更适合出现在… these preposterous inventions would be suited...
《珍奇故事杂志》上 to the pages of Amazing Tales Magazine.
如果曼哈顿阿耳戈斯报的编辑们认为… If the editors of the Manhattan Argus see fit...
出版这些奇思异想是合适的 to publish the rantings of a disordered mind...
可能他们就会出版这份东西 perhaps they will see fit to publish this letter.
但我非常怀疑 But I most seriously doubt it.
正如我怀疑 你是否能够在《珍奇故事杂志》上找一个家… As I doubt also that you could find a home at Amazing Tales...
这是一份我喜欢了很久的周刊 a periodical which I have enjoyed for many years.
祝好… 等等等等 Sincerely, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.
就这么多 巴恩斯先生？ Is that all, Mr. Barnes?
额… Uh...
艾蜜你比那位女士更了解我 你觉得我是个低能儿吗？ You know me, Amy, better than this dame. Do you think I'm an imbecile?
嗯 我肯定我… Oh, well, I'm sure I...
说吧说实话我相信你 我非常重视你的观点 Tell the truth. I trust you. I place a lot of stock in your opinion.
- 额… - 哦当然你会有偏向 - Well... - Oh, sure, heh, you're biased.
你是个曼希人 You're a fellow Muncian, heh.
那就让我来问你个问题: 一个低能儿会想出这样的东西吗？ But let me ask you a question: Would an imbecile come up with this?
我自己设计的 I designed it myself.
这个可爱的小东西 会重新把赫德萨克推向巅峰 This sweet baby will put Hudsucker right back on top.
你知道 给小孩子们的 You know, for kids.
我该去把这份东西打成定稿 Why don't I just type this up?
没有必要 我不会寄出去的 Oh, no, Amy, that won't be necessary. I shouldn't send it.
我想她只是做她的工作罢了 She's just doing her job, I guess.
我不知道 也许她活该 I don't know, maybe she does deserve it.
也许她应该到这里和你私人会晤 Maybe she should have come in here and faced you man-to-man.
她可能有期限 She had a deadline.
当然 她仍然应该为拿到资料而讨你欢心 Sure, but she still could've gotten your side, for the record.
事情都发生了 现在埋怨有什么用？ Well, it's done now. What's the use of grousing about it? Ha, ha.
别去管这封信了 我只想出出气 Forget the letter, Amy, I just had to blow off some steam. Heh.
她可能只是有点困扰 She's probably just a little confused.
- "困扰？" - 她大概是个快嘴的职业女性 - Confused? - She's probably a fast-talking career gal...
觉得自己是男人中的一员 如果你明白我的意思 thinks she's one of the boys. If you know what I mean, heh.
哦 我十分肯定 我不明白你的意思 Oh, I'm quite sure I don't know what you mean.
她们大概对自己现在的变态心理觉得痛苦 Suffers from one of these complexes they have nowadays.
很明显 Seems pretty obvious.
她大概非常平庸而且为此而痛苦 She's probably very unattractive and bitter about it.
- 哦 真的吗？ - 耶 - Oh, is that it? - Yeah.
她可能男性装束 She probably dresses in men's clothing...
在当地的酒吧和男人们一起喝酒… drinks with the guys at the watering hole...
与一些健谈的卑鄙记者买醉 hobnobs with some smooth-talking heel named Bidd...
那些叫什么比夫的 或是斯慕切 或是… - 斯米梯 or Smoocher or, uh... - Smitty.
没错 我肯定她长得难看非常难看 Exactly. I bet she's ugly, real ugly.
不然 她的署名旁为什么没有照片？ Otherwise, why isn't her picture next to her byline?
也许她觉得作品比外表更重要 Oh, maybe she puts her work ahead of her personal appearance.
我肯定她也是这么对自己说的 I bet that's exactly what she tells herself.
但你我都知道 她是个干枯的痛苦的老女人 But you and I both know she's a dried-up, bitter old maid.
下班后一起吃点饭再去看场电影怎么样？ Amy, how about we grab a little dinner and a show after work?
不如去看《国王去我》？ I was thinking maybe The King and I.
那《俄克拉荷马》呢？ Uh, how about Oklahoma!?
你对女人一无所知 Norville, you don't know a thing about that woman!
你不了解真正的她 You don't know who she really is.
只有傻瓜才会觉得他知道… And only a numbskull thinks he knows things...
那些他一无所知的事情 about things he knows nothing, uh, about.
哦 到底怎么啦？ Say, what gives?
杰克逊维尔工厂的 The inventory of the Jacksonville...
库存应该减少… 15% facility should be reduced by 15 percent.
根据席德尼·J·穆斯伯格的备忘录… Memo from the desk of Sidney J. Mussburger...
你在干什么 阿尔切小姐？ What are you doing down there, Ms. Archer?
嗯？ Huh?
你是谁？你怎么知道我的名字？ Who are you? How did you know who I am?
我猜老摩西知道所有的事… I suspect Old Moses knows just about everything...
至少是和赫德萨克有关的 leastways if it concerns Hudsucker.
你是谁？在这里干什么？ But who are you? What do you do here?
我维护这个老钟的运转 这老钟需要很多的照顾 I keep the old circle turning. This old clock needs plenty of care.
时间就是金钱 阿尔切小姐 Time is money, Ms. Archer.
金钱推动全球的经济… And money drives that old global economy...
并让地球老爸持续转动 and keeps Big Daddy Earth spinning around.
- 看没有这些主要结构… - 耶 耶 - See, without that capital formation... - Yeah, yeah.
你不会跟任何人说起我的对吗？ Say, you won't tell anyone about me, will you?
我不会跟任何人说任何事… 除非他们问我 I don't tell no one nothing unless they ask.
那可不是老摩西的方式 That just ain't Old Moses' way.
如果你觉得你对赫德萨克了如指掌… So if you know everything about Hudsucker...
那就告诉我为什么董事会 决定让诺维尔·巴恩斯做总裁？ tell me why the board decided to make Norville Barnes president?
刚开始老摩西也为此而惊讶 Well, that even surprised Old Moses at first.
- 我当时觉得董事会并非那么明智 - "那么明智？" - I didn't think the board was that smart. - "That smart"?
但后来我领悟到了 But then I figured it out.
他们这么做是因为… 他们认为年轻的诺维尔就像 They did it because they figured young Norville for an imbecile...
我所知的其他人一样是个低能儿 like some other people I know.
到底为什么董事会要让一个傻子来做总裁？ Now, why on earth would the board want a nitwit to be president?
因为他们都是小猪仔 他们试图煽动恐慌… Because they're little piglets. They're trying to inspire panic...
来重挫股价 这样他们就可以全盘扫进 make that stock cheap so they can snatch it all up for themselves.
不过诺维尔的袖子里有些花招 真的有 But Norville, he's got some tricks up his sleeve. He does.
"你知道 给孩子们的？" You know, for kids.
耶他是个聪明的家伙 那个诺维尔 Yeah, he's a smart one, that Norville.
但是我认为你对他的了解 并不比董事会多多少对吗？ But I guess you don't really know him any better than that board does...
对吗 阿尔切小姐 do you, Ms. Archer?
- 嗯 可能我… - 只有那些蠢货 - Well, maybe I... - And only some kind of knuckle-head...
才会认为她自己知道那些… thinks she knows things about things she, uh...
她一无… When she don't, uh...
- 怎么说来着？ - 哦 完全不一样 - How'd that go? - Well, it's hardly the same.
你甚至不了解你自己 Why, you don't even know your own self.
你并不完全是个诚实的人 对吗 阿尔切小姐？ You ain't exactly the genuine article, are you, Ms. Archer?
由于工作的关系 Yes, well, in connection with my job...
有时我不得不秘密行事 形势所迫 sometimes I have to, uh, go undercover, as it were.
我不是这个意思 I don't mean that.
你为什么要装出一幅非常讨人嫌的老脸？ Why are you pretending to be such a hard old sourpuss?
这样你永远也不会快乐 Ain't gonna never make you happy.
我够快乐了 I'm happy enough.
好吧 阿尔切小姐 Okay, Ms. Archer.
我要去检查齿轮了 I got gears to see to.
我非常地快乐 I'm plenty happy!
喂 Hello?
- 这个我不能出版 - 为什么？这是真的 - I can't print that! - Why not? It's all true.
董事会用他来 压抑股价以便低价买进 The board's using him to depress the stock to buy it cheap.
这完全是猜测 他们会让我寝食难安的 It's pure speculation! They'd have my butt in a satchel!
- 哦 寝食难安 - 我知道他们要买进股票… - Ah. Old satchel butt. - I know they're gonna buy that stock.
你什么都不懂他们至今还没动手 他们在等什么？ You don't. They haven't bought it.
股票很便宜 他们在等什么？ The stock's cheap! What are they waiting for?
- 我不知道 - 艾蜜的直觉通常很准 - I don't know. - Amy's hunches are usually pretty good.
你不能凭直觉去责难 别人操控股市 You don't accuse somebody of stock manipulation on a hunch.
我们的读者对感觉论流言 无根据的猜测… The readers aren't interested in sensationalism...
都不感兴趣 事实 图像 gossip, unsupported speculation! Facts! Figures! Charts!
这些才是报业的工具 Those are the tools of the newspaper trade.
要好像你正试图消除他的欲望 好像你已经爱上了他 It's as if you're trying to take the heat off this Barnes numbskull.
哦头 这太下流了 Oh, come on, chief. That's a low blow.
阿尔切才不会为了个食草白痴去发骚呢 Archer's not going to go gooey for a corn-fed idiot.
我离题了可你的这个 股市诈骗事件也离题了 I was out of line. But you're out of line with this stock-swindle story.
多给我来点"西伯根的低能儿"这样的题材 Give me more of that "moron from Sheboygan" studd.
- 曼希 - 不管是哪里 - Muncie. - Whatever.
这才是卖点 That's what sells newspapers!
我有个更厉害的故事: "本地新闻报的傻瓜" I've got a harder story, "The Sap From The City Desk!"
- 注意用词 - 是关于一个智商低下的主编… - Watch it! - It's about a dim-witted editor who...
冷静点 硬汉们 Easy, tough guy. Heh-heh-heh.
我穿这套衣服是不是像男人婆？ Does this suit look mannish to you?
是的 当然 我们去搭快车吧 Yeah, sure. Let's grab a highball.
退后 Back off!
斯慕切 Smoocher!
怎么啦？ Eh. What gives?
一个具有巨大管理能力的人 A man of great managerial potency.
我丈夫也是一个总裁 My husband is also a president.
布拉德公司的希尔·布雷维特 您听说过吗？ Sears Braithwaite of Bullard. Do you know him?
您的朋友简直像首诗 Your companion is an ode!
一首抒情诗 你们订婚了吗？ A lyric! Are you betrothed?
艾蜜在我的办公室工作 她负责… Amy works in my office. She runs, uh...
- 哦 年少荒唐 - 那些青涩记忆中的山丘 - Oh, the folly of youth. - Those green remembered hills.
涌出溪流已无法回头 That bourn from which no traveler returns.
我曾经为席德尼负责打印 I once ran the mimeograph for Sidney.
虽然那时已经和别人订婚了… Though engaged at the time to quelqu'un d'autre...
我止水般的爱情变成了一段狂恋 my water-cooler romance became a mad passion.
一段疯狂的恋情两个疯狂的人 Uh. An amour fou. A folie à deux.
我正在跟一位非常迷人的男士练习法语… I'm brushing up on my French with the most charming man...
第五大街的皮埃尔 - 哦 Pierre of 5th Avenue. - Oh!
- 你认识他？ - 你认识他？ - Do you know him? - Do you know him?
席德尼和我计划到巴黎 以及欧洲的一些地方旅行 Sidney and I are planning a trip to Paris and points continental.
- 哦 - 对吗 亲爱的？ - Oh. - Aren't we, dear?
当然 如果你们不介意的话 我想"借用"一下诺维尔 For sure. I would like to borrow Norville for a while, if you don't mind, dear.
哦 事实上我… Oh, well, uh, frankly, I...
你妻子非常迷人… 席德先生 You have a very charming wife, Mr... Sid.
他们都这么说 So they tell me.
诺维尔 我带你去见识一些人物 Norville, let me shepherd you through some of the introductions here.
不要说得太多 Try not to talk too much.
有些是我们最大的股东… Some of our biggest stockholders are...
算了你想说什么就说什么 Scratch that. Say whatever you like.
与布拉德公司的希尔·布雷维特握个手吧 Shake hands here with Sears Braithwaite of Bullard.
- 先生 - 很高兴认识你 巴恩斯 - Sir. - Glad to know you, Barnes.
这位是泽比龙·卡尔多索… And this is Zebulon Cardozo...
赫德萨克最大也是最忠诚的股东之一 one of Hudsucker's largest and most loyal stockholders.
你就是我所听说的那个低能儿吗？ What's this I hear about you being an imbecile?
是什么让你烦恼 孩子？ What's ailing you, boy?
上个星期我的股票面值是现在的两倍 Last week, my stock was worth twice what it is now.
我想我会… 把它们全部卖掉 孩子 I'm getting out of the whole kit and caboodle of it, boy...
除非能见到巨大的进展 unless I see a vast improvement.
孩子你在这里所看到的 是一系列的战争 What you've got here, son, is a range war!
你必须要使我们的马车运转起来 不然我就离开马车队 You're gonna have to circle our wagons or I'm gonna get out of your wagon train.
不用担心先生 这很正常… No need for concern, sir.
在过渡期 It's only natural in a period of transition...
很多胆小鬼都跑去找庇护了 for the more timid elements to run.
胆小鬼？我让你看看什么叫胆小鬼 孩子 Yellow? I'll show you yellow, boy!
泽比龙 控制你的情绪 别像一只老灰熊似的 Zebulon, you mind now and quit acting like such an old grizzly.
到这边来 诺维尔 Step lively here, Norville.
我很抱歉我以为也许我可以向他 展现一个远景… I'm sorry, Sid, uh, I thought maybe if I showed him the long view...
这位是索斯坦森·芬兰森… And this is Thorstenson Finlandson...
一群不满的投资者所组成的 激进小组织的领袖 who heads a radical splinter group of disgruntled investors.
很高兴认识您 芬兰森先生 Ah. Pleased to meet you, Mr. Finlandson.
您可能会对我在高中时学的一点芬兰语感兴趣 It might interest you to know I studied Finnish in high school.
我希望不会太生疏 Let see, I hope I'm not too rusty. Um...
女士们先生们 Ladies and gentlemen...
赫德萨克董事会的著名成员… distinguished members of the Hudsucker board...
我向你们介绍"罗曼史酋长" "月光之迷你立体声"… I give you the Rajah of Romance, the Ministereo of Moonlight...
无法想象的 难以忘怀的… the incredible, the unforgettable...
维克·特内塔先生 Mr. Vic Tenetta!
"酋长" 我喜欢 Rajah, I like that.
# Take one fresh and tender kiss #
# Add one stolen night of bliss #
# One girl one boy Some grief some joy #
# Memories are made of this #
# Don't #
诺维尔？ Norville?
怎么啦？ What happened?
没事 只是那些胆小的投资者 不再跑去找庇护了 Oh, nothing. Just the more timid investors are no longer running for cover.
- 让我看看 - 席德给我找了个冰袋 - Let me look. - Sid found me the ice pack.
我来拿着 不然你会有黑眼圈 Well, let me hold it or you'll have a real shiner.
哦 谢谢 Oh, thanks.
我想大家很热衷于这个低能儿的故事 I guess people are pretty hot over this imbecile story.
对不起 I'm sorry.
又不是你的错 Oh, it's not your fault, Amy.
你从头到尾一直站在我这边 You're the one person standing by me through this.
诺维尔 有些事必须要告诉你 Norville, there's something I have to tell you.
你看… 我并不真正是个秘书 You see, I'm not really a secretary.
- 我知道 艾蜜 - 真的？ - I know that, Amy. - You do?
你明白你的秘书技能并不很熟练… I understand you're not very skilled yet in the secretarial arts...
但我要告诉你一个秘密: 我做总裁也不熟练 but I'll tell you a secret, I'm not that skilled as president.
- 我知道我门面上装得很好可… - 我相信你诺维尔 - I know I put up a big front, but, uh... - I believe in you, Norville.
至少… 我相信你的用意 At least, I believe in your intentions.
我并不怪他们 真的 我想是我搞得一团糟 Oh, I don't blame them, really. I suppose I have made a mess of things.
那些人不得不保护他们的投资 Those folks have to protect their investment.
他们中大部分都是好人 Most of them are very nice people.
听着 你不能像在曼希那样相信这里的人 Listen, Norville, you can't trust people here like you did in Muncie.
某些人… Certain people are...
你去过拉尔森的了望塔塔顶并俯瞰城镇吗？ See, did you ever go to the top of Larson's feed tower and look out over the town?
- 什么？ - 在农场路17号？ - What? - On Farm Route 17?
哦对 在曼希 Oh, yes, in Muncie.
- 不对 维达利亚农场路17号 - 17对 - No, Vidalia. Farm Route 17. - Oh, yes, 17, yes.
我… 嗯没有没有我从未真正地… I... Well, no, no. I never really.
那些大学运动队的家伙要到那里约会… The guys from the Varsity Squad would bring their dates up there to...
手牵着手 hold hands.
当然我从未进过运动队 Of course, I never made Varsity.
现在我想去一个地方 There's a place I go now.
在格林威治村靠近我公寓 一个非常可爱的小地方 Cutest little place near my apartment in Greenwich Village.
叫做"安娜的440" 是一个垮掉派的酒吧 It's called Ann's 440. It's a beatnik bar.
- 不是吧？ - 是的 - You don't say? - Yes.
- 垮掉派的酒吧？ - 你可以喝到胡萝卜汁… - A beatnik bar. - You can get carrot juice...
或是意大利咖啡 那里的人们… 嗯都稀奇古怪 or Italian coddee and the people there, well, none of them quite fit in.
你会喜欢的 You'd love it.
和我一起去吧 Why don't you come there with me?
在新年前夕那儿会有一个诗朗诵马拉松 我每年都去 There's a marathon poetry-reading on New Year's Eve. I go every year.
- 非常不可思议 - 每年？ - It's marvelous. - Every year?
嗯 是今年 如果不错的话 我计划把它定为惯例 Well, this year, if it's good, I plan to make it a tradition, heh.
我 额 额… I, uh, heh...
我 这当然很漂亮 人们… 看起来像蚂蚁 My, it certainly is beautiful. The people look like ants.
印度人还有垮掉的一代也是 他们说… Well, the Hindus say, and the beatniks also...
来生我们有些人会变成蚂蚁 that in our next lives some of us will come back as ants.
有些人变成蝴蝶有些变大象 Some will be butterflies, others will be elephants...
或是海里的动物 or creatures of the sea.
多美妙的想法 What a beautiful thought.
你认为你前生是什么？ Hey, what do you think you were in a previous life, Amy?
哦 我不知道 也许我只是… Oh, I don't know. Maybe I was just, uh...
一个快嘴的职业女性 觉得自己是男人中的一员 a fast-talking career gal who thought she was one of the boys.
哦不 艾蜜 Oh, no, Amy.
原谅我这么说 但我发现这将是段漫长的旅程 Pardon me for saying so, but I find that very far-fetched.
- 我真的有些事必须要告诉你 - 那些人回来之后 - No, I have to tell you... - That person would come back...
会像只肥猪 as a wildebeest or a warthog.
我觉得你更像是一只瞪羚… No, I find it more likely that you were a gazelle...
有着修长而优美的腿 在树丛中雀跃 with long, graceful legs, gamboling through the underbrush.
也许我们曾经相逢 Perhaps we met once.
在森林沼泽地 一次偶然相逢 A chance encounter in a forest glade.
我肯定是只羚羊或是野山羊 I must have been an antelope or an ibex.
那时我们肯定在一起寻找嫩草为食… The times we must've had foraging together for sustenance...
饮取山间小溪的水… snorfling water from a mountain stream...
为对方清除皮毛上的虫子与杂物 picking the grubs and burrs from one another's coats.
也可能我们只是简单地碰了碰角 就分道扬镳 Or perhaps we simply touched horns briefly and went our separate ways.
哦 我真希望事情是如此简单 诺维尔 Oh, I wish it were that simple, Norville.
我希望我仍然是只瞪羚 而你是只羚羊… I wish I was still a gazelle and you were an antelope...
或是野山羊 or an ibex.
嗯… Well...
我可否至少叫你一声鹿(亲爱的)？… can I at least call you "deer?"
你真好玩 You're funny.
认真地说 艾蜜 你的垮掉派朋友称之为"因果报应" Seriously, Amy, it's what your beatnik friends call "karma."
- "因果报应" - 伟大的生命循环 死亡与重生 - Karma. - The great circle of life, death and rebirth.
我想我听说过 就是来来回回 Yes, I think I heard of that. What goes around, comes around.
就是如此一个给予我们所应得的伟大轮回 That's it. A great wheel that gives us all what we deserve.
我要去让席德和所有人知道 我值得他们信任 I gotta show Sid and all the guys I deserve their confidence.
明天我将对董事会作一个重要陈述 Tomorrow's my big presentation to the board.
吻我 艾蜜 吻我一下以示祝福 Kiss me, Amy! Kiss me once for luck.
当然 诺维尔 Sure, Norville, sure.
嘘 Shh.
(请安静 董事会议进行中)
你们知道 给小孩子们的 You know, for kids!
它经济 简单 低成本 It has economy, simplicity, low production cost...
还有潜在的大量需求 potential for mass appeal.
这些将带来巨大收益 All that spells out great profitability.
我让R&D的孩子们做了这个原型… I had the boys down at R&D throw together this prototype...
这样我们的讨论就可以有焦点… so our discussion could have some focus...
而且让各位先生对这个令人振奋的小发明 有一个直观的印象 and to give you gentleman a firsthand look at how exciting this gizmo is.
它好玩健康适合锻炼 孩子们会喜欢的 It's fun, healthy, good exercise, and the kids will just love it.
我们在里面放点沙子 让这种体验更为刺激 We put a little sand inside to make the experience more pleasant.
最大的特色在于我们可以不用脚和手 But the great part is we don't have to charge an arm and a leg.
如果做完之前累了怎么办？ What if you tire before it's done?
有什么规则吗？ Does it have rules?
- 可以多人参加吗？ - 为什么这会是个游戏？ - Can more than one play? - It's a game?
- 这是个游戏吗？ - 它会破吗？ - Is it a game? - Will it break?
- 最好是最后会破 - 有目标吗？ - It better break eventually. - Is there an object?
- 如果做完之前累了怎么办？ - 它用电池吗？ - What if you tire before it's done? - Does it have batteries?
- 我们可以收取额外费用吗？ - 对学步的孩子安全吗？ - Could we charge extra for them? - Is it safe for toddlers?
怎么才能知道是否结束了？ How do you know you're finished?
怎么停下来 How does it stop?
- 那是一个男孩的型号吗？ - 父母可以自己装配吗？ - Is that a boy's model? - Can a parent assemble it?
如果做完之前累了怎么办？ What if you tire before it's done?
有没有更大的型号给那些胖子？ Is there a larger model for the obese?
那到底是什么？ What the hell is it?
嗯 这是… Well, it's a... It's a...
它是… It's a...
太棒了 Brilliant!
天才 Genius.
这确实就是赫德萨克企业 在这关键时刻所需要的 It's exactly what Hudsucker Industry needs at this juncture.
当然 当然 Sure, sure.
即使是瞎子也会告诉你将会有多么大的需求量… Even a blind man can tell you there'll be an enormous demand for this, uh...
对于这个… This...
祝贺你 Congratulations, kid.
你超越了自我 重塑了轮子 You've outdone yourself. You've reinvented the wheel.
我将向董事会建议我们马上将… I'll recommend to the board that we proceed immediately and that the, uh...
这个… And that the, uh...
小玩意以更慎重的速度大量生产 dingus be mass-produced with all deliberate speed.
虽然你意识到了… Although, you realize...
当然… of course...
作为总裁… as president...
最大的决定权在于你 the ultimate decision is yours.
我赞成 Oh. I'm for it.
我们会叫它 会飞的面包圈 We'll call it the Flying Doughnut!
摇摆小玩意 The Dancing Dingus!
胃转转 The Belly-Go-Round.
摆摆乐 The Swingerina!
古怪圆圈 The Wacky Circumference!
肚子叔叔 Uncle Midriff!
(这值多少？)
(单个成本:59 建议零售价:79)
- 我们需要一些简短的 - 强烈的 - We need something short! - Sharp!
- 爽快的 - 带点爵士的 - Snappy! - With a little jazz!
爵士乐迷 The Shazzammeter!
转身变 The Hipster!
O爸爸 The Daddy-O!
- 圆环傻瓜 - 赫德摇摆 - The Hoopsucker. - The Hudswinger.
- 圆环傻瓜 - 赫德摇摆 - The Hoopsucker! - The Hudswinger!
- 伙计们 - 你有什么点子？ - Fellas! - You got something?
你想到了什么？ You got something?
伙计们 我有个点子 Fella, I got something!
(呼拉圈)
女士们 Ladies.
哇 Wow.
诺维尔 Norville!
洛克威尔新闻敬献: 时代珍闻 Rockwell News presents, Tidbits of Time.
世界新闻画面报道 我们没有骗你 World news in pictures, we kid you not.
"1958年老人"蹒跚地走向尽头… As Old Man 1958 hobbles towards his finish...
巴恩斯这个名字在美国变得家喻户晓 Barnes is the name on every American lip.
诺维尔·巴恩斯 赫德萨克工业的年轻总裁… Norville Barnes, young president of Hudsucker Industries...
这个生长在中部的男孩 现在成了纽约的大人物 a boy bred in the heartland, but now the toast of New York.
聪明的巴恩斯发明了 美国最为狂热的风潮:呼拉圈 Barnes is the brainy inventor of America's craziest craze:
呼啦圈 The Hula-Hoop!
这给他的公司带来了巨大收益 并赢得了美国… Reaping huge profits for his company and winning the hearts...
每个年青人的心与喝彩 and hips of every youngster in America!
我说过是年青人吗？ Woo-ho. Did I say youngster?
这位妈妈正忙里偷闲… Here's Mom taking a break from her household chores...
甚至连爸爸也玩得起劲 and even Dad is swinging into the act!
卡片信件贺辞 Cards, letters, congratulations...
从肯卡基到佩塔路玛 雪片般飞来… come pouring in from Kankakee to Petaluma...
其中包括一个特殊的长途电话 including one very special long-distance call.
打来了 他打来了 He's on! He's on the line!
- 你好 - 你好 诺维尔 - Hello? - Hello, Norville.
- 我是总统 - 哦 天哪 总统 - This is the President. - Oh, my God, sir.
祝贺你 我为你而感到非常骄傲 I just wanted to congratulate you. I'm very proud of you.
- 哦 天哪 总统 - 艾森豪威尔夫人为你感到非常骄傲 - Oh, my God, sir. - Mrs. Eisenhower is very proud of you.
美国人民为你感到非常骄傲 The American people are very proud of you.
巴恩斯先生 你这个呼拉圈的创意是怎么来的？ Mr. Barnes, how'd you come up with the idea for the Hula-Hoop?
这并不是个伟大的创意 真的 It was no great idea, really.
这样一个东西得到了 A thing like this takes a whole company to put together.
全公司的倾力合作我很感激 I'm grateful for the opportunity.
你是否预料到会有如此大的反响？ Did you have any idea there'd be such a huge response?
坦白的说 我以为大家只会把它当作投环游戏 Frankly, I don't think anybody expected this much hoopla.
"投环投中呼拉圈" 我们可以这么引用你的话吗 巴恩斯先生？ "Hoopla on the Hula-Hoop." Can we quote you on that, Mr. Barnes?
当然 我想可以 Sure, I guess.
你会给自己加一笔丰厚的薪水吗？ Mr. Barnes, will you give yourself a nice, fat raise?
拜托 你们这些家伙 Come on, you guys.
(智多星:想象无界限)
什么科学原理可以解释 What scientific principle explains the mind-bending motion...
这奇迹轮子的运动？ of this whipping wheel of wonder?
这小玩意很简单 真的 The dingus is quite simple, really.
它与地球绕着太阳转 It operates on the same principles...
的原理是一样的… that keep the Earth spinning around the sun...
这能让你 and that keeps you from flying off the Earth...
不会飞到太空去… into the cold reaches of space...
在那里你会像只可怜的猪那样死去 where you would die like a miserable swine.
是的 原理是一样的… Yes, the principle is the same...
除了那些他们放进去以增加乐趣的… except for the piece of grit they put in to make the experience...
细砂子之外 more pleasant.
没错 到处都是呼啦呼啦 Yes, it's Hula-Hula everywhere!
从派克大街舞会上的时髦人士… From the parties of the Park Avenue smart set...
到那些想在摇摆中结婚的爱人们 to sweethearts who want to be married in the swing of things.
巴恩斯先生 董事会提拔你的时候 Mr. Barnes, did the board consider you an idea man...
是否就认为你是个"智多星"？ when they promoted you from the mailroom?
我想是的 我认为他们不会因为我是个笨蛋而提拔我 I guess so, I don't think they promoted me because they thought I was a schmo.
你和赫德萨克工业的下一个奇妙创意是什么？ Mr. Barnes, what's the next big idea for you and Hudsucker?
我不知道 Jesus, I don't know.
创意就像这个可爱的孩子 不会整晚都来 An idea like this sweet baby doesn't just come overnight.
但是我可以告诉你们一件事: 我的确没料到这一切 这呼啦圈 Although, I'll tell you one thing, I certainly didn't expect all this hoopla.
你们可以引用我这句话 You can quote me on that.
(智多星在踩水)
巴恩斯先生让帕斯杂志称你为今年最合格的学士 Rumpus Magazine has called you the most eligible bachelor.
社交界专栏又把你和时髦模特扎扎联系在一起 And society pages have been linking you with fashion model Za-Za.
- 对此你有什么看法吗？谣言就是谣言 - You care to comment? - There's no truth to the rumors.
我们只是好朋友 对吗 扎扎？ We're just dear friends. Isn't that right, Za-Za?
哇 Wow.
哦 Ooh.
对于那些认为你已经江郎才尽的讽刺你作何反应？ Whoa. How do you respond to the charges that you're out of ideas?
诺维尔·巴恩斯不行了吗？ Has Norville Barnes run dry?
绝非如此就在这个星期 我还想到了很多新的好创意 Not at all. Just this week I came up with several new sweet ideas.
给肥胖者做个大码的 给懒人或大脑麻痹者加个电池装置 A larger model Hula-Hoop for the portly, a battery option for the lazy or spastic.
给失聪者做个加沙型的 A model with extra sand for the hard-of-hearing.
哦对我正在赚钱维持生活 I'm earning my keep.
谈谈你是否希望得到加薪？ Speaking of that, do you expect to get a raise?
所有人都知道我单手挽救了赫德萨克工业 By anyone's account, I single-handedly have saved Hudsucker Industries.
我们股票比从前更值钱了 Our stock is worth more now than ever.
没错 我想要为此得到报酬 Yes, I expect to be compensated for that.
(智多星的罗曼史)
- 振作起来伙计 - 没人告诉我 - Pull yourself together, man. - Nobody told me!
你把我们所有的股票都卖出去了？ You sold all our stock?
我们清仓了 We dumped the whole load.
我曾有20000股份 I had 20,000 shares!
我现在本该是百万富翁 I'd be a millionaire now.
没错我们都该是百万富翁 Sure. We'd all be millionaires.
世上没有后悔药 There's no point in looking back.
那时斯蒂尔森认为清仓会引起市场恐慌… At the time, Stillson thought dumping our position would panic the market...
以此来重挫股价 further depress the stock.
这样我们就可以买回更多 当然要等它便宜的时候 Then we could buy it back and more, of course, once it got cheap.
便宜？从没有这么值钱过？ Cheap? It's never been more valuable!
我全完了 完了 And I'm ruined. Ruined!
艾迪尔森 Addison.
我要从这旋转木马上下来了 I'm getting off this merry-go-round!
麦恩 Myron.
树脂玻璃 Plexiglas.
上个星期叫人来装的 Had it installed last week.
麦恩？ Myron?
好了 这孩子妙手偶得 All right, so the kid caught a wave.
现在他和他的小玩意正值巅峰 Right now, he and his dingus are on top.
嗯 这总会过去的 Well, this too shall pass.
默特尔·J·穆斯伯格养育的孩子… Myrtle J. Mussburger did not raise her boy to go...
不会一碰到困难就吓得走X步 knock-kneed at the first sign of adversity.
我敢说我们捧红了这个笨蛋 我们也可以毁了他 I say, we made this chump, we can break him!
我敢说 他爬得越高摔得越重 I say, the higher he climbs, the harder he drops!
我敢说是的… I say, yes...
这孩子有这样一个未来… the kid has a future...
在里面… and in it...
我看到了羞愧耻辱… I see shame, dishonor...
丑闻堕落 ignominy, disgrace.
当然 当然 Sure, sure.
音乐继续放 轮盘继续转… The music plays, the wheel turns...
而我们的时代还没有完 and our spin ain't over yet.
看在彼得的份上 诺维尔 For Pete's sakes, Norville!
你躲哪儿去了？ Oh, Amy, where have you been hiding?
你知道那些笨蛋在会议室里干什么吗？ Do you know what those nincompoops in the boardroom are doing?
我可不愿叫他们笨蛋 I wouldn't call them nincompoops.
他们打算要解雇赫德萨克8%的员工 They're discharging 80 percent of the workforce.
单单在纽约 这就意味着1800人失业 In New York City alone, that means 1800 people out of work!
他们都有妻子孩子和家庭 People with wives, children and families!
是的 我们要去芜存精 Oh, yes, we're pruning away some of the dead wood.
- 你是说你知道这些事？ - 知道这些事？当然 - You mean you know about this? - Know about it? Sure.
你以为没有我的许可 董事会可以做任何事吗？ You think the board would do anything without my authorization?
本来就是我的主意 It was my idea from the start.
- 你的… - 没错 - Your... - Sure, it was.
我们正处于过渡期 事态已经缓下来了 We're in a period of transition here. Things have slowed.
你对自己可真仁慈啊 诺维尔·巴恩斯 You're being awfully kind to yourself, Norville Barnes.
你缓下来坐在这里什么事都不干 You've slowed down, sitting up here like a sultan, not doing a lick of work.
从那个圆环之后你一筹莫展 You know ideas are the lifeblood of industry...
而原因非常明显 and you haven't come up with one since the Hoop.
你已经忘记了起先是什么 令你对自己的创意感到兴奋 You've forgotten what made your ideas exciting to you.
不是为了名誉与财富… If it wasn't for the fame, wealth, the adulation...
你们可以出去吗？ Would you get out of here?
还有你们 姐妹们 快点出去 You too, sisters, move it. Out, out, out!
我一直在监视你 虽然你一直想逃避我 I've been watching you, even though you've been avoiding me.
闭嘴 Shut up!
别以为我没注意到你有多大的变化 Don't think I haven't noticed how you've changed.
我曾经以为你是个可爱的家伙 I used to think you were a swell guy.
诚实地说我认为你是个低能儿 I thought you were an imbecile.
- 也许我… - 闭嘴 - Amy, I'm... - Shut up!
于是我就认定你是个可爱的家伙 Then I figured out you were a swell guy.
也许有点迟钝可还是个可爱的家伙 A little slow, but a swell guy.
嗯可能你没有这么迟钝 但你也没有这么可爱 Maybe you're not so slow, oh, but you're not so swell either.
看起来你毕竟还是个低能儿 闭嘴 Looks like you're an imbecile, after all. Shut up!
你对我说了一个星期 现在轮到我说了 You haven't talked to me for a week and now I'm going to say my piece.
瞧我以前从未… Look, I've never been...
被一个小伙子抛弃过 这让人痛心… dumped by a fella before, and that hurts...
可真正让人痛心的 是看着你遗失了自己的灵魂 but what really hurts is watching you outrun your soul!
追逐金钱与安逸以及董事会的尊敬… Chasing after money and ease and the respect of a board...
他们根本瞧不起你… that wouldn't give you the time of day if you...
- 假如你… - 在钟表厂工作？ - lf you... - Worked in a watch factory?
闭嘴 没错 Shut up! Exactly.
诺维尔你还记得你以前对圆环的感觉吗？ Norville, don't you remember how you used to feel about the Hoop?
你告诉过我你要给美国每个人的屁股 都带去一个笑容… You told me you'd gonna bring a smile to the hips of everyone in America...
不管种族信仰与肤色 regardless of race, creed or color.
最终有了某物把每个人都联系起来… Finally, there'd be a thingamajig that would bring everyone together...
即使在空间上他们是分开的 even if it kept them apart spatially.
"你知道… 给孩子们的" "You know, for kids."
是你的话… 不是我的 诺维尔 Your words, Norville, not mine.
我曾经爱过诺维尔·巴恩斯 I used to love Norville Barnes.
是的爱上了他… Yes, love him...
那时他还只是个可爱的孩子 那些层出的创意令他忙于应付 when he was just a swell kid with hot ideas who was in over his head.
现在你的脑袋大得足以应付了 Now your head's too big to be in over!
- 嘿 - 我辞职 - Hey. - Consider this my resignation.
马上生效 Effective immediately!
伙计 伙计 Buddy, buddy.
伙计 Buddy.
伙计 伙计 说话 伙计 Buddy. Buddy, say, buddy.
伙计 说话 伙计 Buddy, say, buddy.
额…额？ Uh... Huh?
伙计 你忙吗？ Buddy. You busy?
额？ Huh?
你好像打了个盹伙计 那么你有时间吗？ Looks like you nodded off there, buddy. Say, you got a minute?
巴兹？ Buzz?
巴兹重要的事吗？ Is this important?
我想是的是我一直在研究的小创意 I think so. It's this little idea I've been working on.
你瞧我可不想永远做个电梯小子 You see, I don't intend to be an elevator boy forever.
看一下这个可爱的小东西 Take a look at this sweet baby!
明白了吗？难以置信的便利不是吗？ Get it? Incredibly convenient, isn't it?
你知道给饮料的？ You know, for drinks?
这就是使用方法 This is how it works. It's got these ridges...
边上这些折皱可以让它摆动 on the side that give it its whammy.
无论如何你都不会这么喝 你会这么喝 See, you don't have to drink like this anymore. You can drink like this.
我称它为"巴兹吸管" 明白了吗 伙计？ I call it the Buzz-Sucker. You get it, buddy?
人们会因此而疯狂 我们甚至不用动动手或脚 People are dying for this and we won't have to charge an arm an...
等一下 Wait a minute.
嘘 Shh.
这… This...
毫无用处 is worthless!
啊可是伙计 Huh? But, buddy...
这是我见过最白痴的玩意儿 This is the most idiotic thing I've ever seen.
耶 但是 伙计 Yeah, but, buddy...
没人会想用这样一个染发产品 Nobody wants a harebrained product like this.
你瞧巴兹… 它缺乏创造性的火花… You see, Buzz, it lacks the creative spark...
纯粹的天才会制造像… the unalloyed genius that made something like, say...
呼拉圈这样的成就 the, uh, Hula-Hoop such a success.
你竟敢闯进来并占用我宝贵的时间 What do you mean barging in and taking up my time?
我还有整个公司要管理 I've got a company to run here!
- 但是 伙计… - 我可不能让每个游手好闲的员工 - But, buddy... - I can't have every deadbeat...
都拿他们的白痴创意来烦我 on the payroll pestering me with their idiotic brainwaves.
对不起伙计 I'm sorry, buddy.
- 必须杀鸡儆猴 - 你是什么意思 伙计？ - An example must be made. - What do you mean, buddy?
你被解雇了 You're fired.
够清楚了吗？ Is that plain enough for you, buster?
哦伙计 Oh, buddy!
别再叫我"伙计" And don't call me "buddy."
哦求求你先生 这份管理电梯的工作是我的一切 Oh, please, sir! This job running the elevator, it's all I got!
你不喜欢巴兹吸管没关系 Uh, it's okay if you don't like it.
就让我干下去吧 我恳求你 Just let me keep my job, I'm praying to you.
出去 起来 起来 Get out of my office! Get up! Up!
我们不能在赫德萨克企业里爬来爬去 We don't crawl here at Hudsucker Industries!
对不起先生 对不起 I'm sorry, sir! I'm sorry!
（阿耳戈斯报记者荣获普利策奖）
谢谢 阿洛伊修斯 Thank you, Aloysius.
这… This is...
很有用 useful.
很抱歉我迟到了席德 河谷区的后9洞实在太难了 Sorry I'm late, Sid. That back nine at Riverdale's really murder.
这是个艰苦的过程一个真正的大人物 It's a tough course. A real lollapalooza.
坐下孩子 Sit down, son.
我想会议室是个密谈的好地方 I thought the boardroom would be a swell place to chat undisturbed.
在赫德我们好像有些安全问题 Seems we've got some security problems here at the Hud.
不会吧 You don't say.
我本不想打扰你 Ordinarily, I wouldn't bother you with it...
可这挺令人为难的 but this is embarrassing.
它和你直接有关 It concerns you directly.
- 怎么回事？ - 并不很严重 - How's that, Sid? - It's not serious in itself.
某个你解雇的电梯小子对我宣称… Some elevator boy that you'd fired came to me...
你剽窃了他那个小玩意的创意 claiming that you'd stolen the idea for, um, the dingus.
你从他那儿剽窃的 You'd stolen it from him.
- 可能我对他有点粗暴… - 别管了 - Maybe I was a little rough on him... - Forget it.
你不必向我解释 他只是个小人物无足轻重 You don't have to explain to me. He's a little person. He's nothing.
想解雇就解雇吧 Fire whoever you want.
不问题在于… 你所雇佣的人 No, the problem is who you hired.
那位女士 结果是个间谍 That dame. A spy, as it turns out.
她肯定收买了那个电梯笨蛋… She must have gotten to that elevator schnook...
而她的报纸正进展顺利 and her paper is going to town.
当然当然我们也试过要扼杀新闻 但阿耳戈斯报不愿合作 Sure, sure, we tried to kill the story, but the Argus won't play ball.
董事会所面临的难题是你雇佣了这个女人… The problem the board will have is you hired this woman...
把她当心腹… and you kept her on...
而就是她让你出丑 while she was making a chump out of you.
这是个严重的判断失误 Serious error in judgment.
商场如战场孩子 Business is war, kid.
赶尽杀绝不留余地 Take no prisoners, give no second chances.
新年后董事会再碰头时… When the board meets after New Year's...
你的位子… your position...
好像该让贤了 Looks like you're finished.
一切结束 Washed up.
河谷区的第十四洞… Oh, fourteenth hole at Riverdale...
有人用高尔夫短棍… 有人用高尔夫长棍 some use a mashie, some use a niblick.
长棍 Niblick.
你打得太高 太转了 You get more loft, more backspin.
那位女士… That dame...
她几乎撕开了你的咽喉 she got your throat pretty well slit.
你死了就无法复生 When you're dead, you stay dead.
不相信的话去问问沃林·赫德萨克 You don't believe me, ask Waring Hudsucker.
运气很糟糕孩子 你上去的路很短 Tough luck, kid. You had a short climb up.
下来的路很长 It's a long way down.
- 从…窃取创意 这个不能出版 Stolen hoop idea from... You can't print that!
我们就要出版 We are printing it!
今晚它将惊动整个城市 She hits the streets this evening.
这将是个爆炸新闻 And she's dynamite!
可这是骗人的 But, Al, it's the bunk!
我们第一次见面 诺维尔就向我展示了他设计的那个东西 Norville showed me his design the, uh, day I met him.
不可能是巴兹发明的 看看他一个低能儿 Buzz couldn't have invented it. Look at him, he's an imbecile.
干嘛这么歇斯底里？正是甘德森设计的 Aren't you a broken record? Gunderson did design it.
显然 他是个天才 Apparently, he's a prodigy.
- 谁说的？ - 你不是唯一的消息来源 - Says who? - You're not the only one with sources.
史密斯有来自赫德董事会 更高级的消息来源非常高级 Smith has a source on the Hud board. Very hush-hush.
我敢打赌是席德尼·J·穆斯伯格 Yeah. I bet his initials are Sidney J. Mussburger.
看样子你失败了你心软了 You lost it, Amy. You gone soft, by the looks of it.
对迪比克的傀儡心软了 Soft on the dummy from Dubuque.
- 是曼希 - 管他呢 - Muncie - Whatever!
这故事炙手可热而你不再能掌握它 这可是本世纪的独家内幕 This story's hot and you're no longer on top of it. It's the scoop of the century!
其他报纸到明天才会知道 The other papers won't have this till tomorrow!
《德国日报》《费加罗报》 都将被明早的骚动噎着 They'll be choking on our dust come morning.
你们两个笨蛋 你们被利用了这都不明白？ You're fools, both of you! You're being used, don't you see, ugh?
休息一下你太辛苦了 是你为我们打开局面 Take a break. You worked hard on this story. You broke it for us.
不过这已经与你无关 史密斯会接手的 But it's passed you by and Smith's taking up the slack.
你想要休息… 我就让你休息 Tsk, oh, you want slack, I'll give you slack!
你是叫我退休 我不干了 我辞职 You're not putting me out to pasture! I quit! Consider this my resignation!
马上生效 Effective immediately!
温柔点 Soft.
嗯告诉我… So tell me...
这个女人背叛你有什么感觉？ why do you feel this woman betrayed you?
有什么不同？ Tsk, oh, what's the difference?
整个世界好像都在和你作对？ The whole world, it seems, is against you?
我不知道 I don't know.
还有电梯小子… Und the elevator boy...
巴兹他也在和你作对？ Buzz, he too works against you?
是的 Well, yeah.
经典 Classic.
病人表现出倦怠冷漠沮丧… Patient displayed listlessness, apathy, gloomy indidderence...
忧郁及消沉 und was blue und mopey.
当问及罗夏测试中斑点的象征 病人回答: When asked what the Rorschach stains represented, patient replied:
"没什么我不知道 就是个大污点 我真的弄糊涂了" "Nothing much. I don't know. Just a blotch. Sure beats me."
病人没有野心没有魄力没有活力 Patient shows no ambition, no get-up-and-go, no vim.
他正骑在豪华的摩天轮上… He is riding the grand loopen-ze-loop...
它从幻想欢乐的高空… that goes from the height of delusional gaiety...
落向绝望的谷底 to the trough of despair.
现在他正接近但还没到他的最低点 He is now near, but not yet at his lowest point.
当他触底时他可能就会爆发 并对自己和他人构成威胁 When he reaches bottom, he may erupt und pose a danger to himself und others.
诊断呢布罗芬布莱纳医生？ Diagnosis, Dr. Bronfenbrenner?
病人是B型狂燥阴郁妄想症者… Patient is eine manic-depressive paranoid, type B...
并带有强烈的精神分裂倾向 with acute schizoid tendencies.
那么病人…？ So patient is?
是的 疯子 Precisely, nuts!
药方呢？ Prescription?
三个方法: 关押… 电疗… Three things, commitment, electroconvulsive therapy...
送进安全机构 maintenance in eine secure facility.
是的 高个子 一个大笨蛋 Yeah, he's a tall guy. A real mess.
听着你最好过来一趟 他说他是你的一个朋友 Yeah, yeah, look, you better get down here. He says he's a friend of yours.
他没说 不过伙计 他是个老古董 He didn't say. But, man, is he from Squaresville.
我想要杯马提尼 I want a martini!
今天是新年前夕 我该有杯马提尼 It's New Year's Eve. I deserve a martini.
正如我告诉过你的 你不能… Daddy, it's like I've been telling you. You can't ...
我以为你这里会招待不合时宜的人 I thought you served misfits here.
没错 可我们不售酒 Yeah, daddy. That's a roger. But we don't sell alcohol.
马提尼都没有这是什么酒吧？ What kind of bar is it, you can't get a martini?
这是果汁咖啡吧伙计 正如我告诉过你的 It's a juice-and-coddee bar, man, like I've been telling you.
- 好吧那么我要一杯马提尼… - 额 - Right. So I want a martini. - Argh.
这一路过来我在每个酒吧都来一杯马提尼 I've had a martini in every bar all the way down here, heh.
老古董才喝马提尼伙计 Martinis are for squares, man.
你叫我什么 你这个颓废派婊子… What'd you call me, you beatnik son of a...?
诺维尔 Norville.
什么 What?
- 嚯嚯 看看谁来了 艾蜜·阿尔切… - 哦 不 - Oh-ho, look who's here, Amy Archer... - Oh, no.
普利策奖获得者 Prizeter Pule winner.
你在找个笨蛋请你吃饭吗？ Looking for a nitwit to buy you lunch?
- 诺维尔 对不起 - 伙计 我要… - Norville, I'm sorry. - Bar fella, I'd like...
一杯马提尼谢谢 a martini, please.
好几次我都想告诉你我… I tried to tell you so many times, I...
当你做错事… 很难去承认 It's hard to admit when you've been wrong.
你是否… If you could just...
情愿… 再给我一次机会 find it in your heart to give me another chance.
"赶尽杀绝 不留余地" "You take no prisoners, give no second chances."
求求你诺维尔 请再给我一次机会 Please, Norville! Please give me one more chance!
也给你自己 我们都应该有一次 And yourself too. We both deserve one.
只要给我们第二次机会 Just give us a second chance.
我们可以一起战斗 Together we can fight this thing.
我知道最后的故事是个谎言 我们能够证明 I know this last story was a lie and we can prove it.
你可以发表一项声明 You got to release a statement.
- 我可以帮你写 - 有什么用？ - I can help you write it. - Oh, what's the difference?
都结束了 I'm all washed up.
油尽灯枯 智人格言 Extinct. Homo sapiens sapicus.
正是如此吧 Well, heh, that just about does it.
我曾见过急性子的诺维尔·巴恩斯… I've seen Norville Barnes, the young man in a big hurry...
也曾见过坚持立场的诺维尔·巴恩斯 and I've seen Norville Barnes, the self-important heel.
可从未见过懦弱的诺维尔·巴恩斯… But I've never seen Norville Barnes, the quitter...
我不喜欢这样 and I don't like it.
继续战斗 Fight on.
继续战斗 亲爱的老曼希 Fight on, dear old Muncie.
为了金蓝旗的升起而继续战斗 Fight on. Hoist the gold and blue.
你将衣衫褴褛 受尽折磨与伤害 You'll be tattered, torn and hurting.
当曼希与你共雄起 Once the Munce is done with you.
展翅高飞 Go, Eagles.
你不能投降诺维尔 记住: You can't surrender, Norville. Remember.
继续战斗 继续战斗 亲爱的老曼希 Fight on, Fight on Dear old Muncie
为了金蓝旗的升起而继续战斗 Fight on Hoist the gold and blue
"你将衣衫褴褛… 受尽折磨与伤害…" You'll be tattered, torn and hurting
你骗我 你怎么能骗我？ You lied to me. How could you lie to me?
你… 一个曼希姑娘 You, a Muncie girl.
可是诺维尔我… But, Norville, I...
"你死了就无法复生" 去问问沃林·赫德萨克吧 When you're dead, you stay dead. Just ask Waring Hudsucker!
哦 诺维尔 Oh, Norville.
号外号外 新年前夕版 Extra, extra! New Year's Eve edition!
巴恩斯剽窃创意当场被抓 Barnes' brain caught red-handed!
创意骗子 Ideas ersatz!
从曼希来的低能儿 Man from Muncie a moron after all!
来看看所有这一切 Read all about it!
新年前夕版 从曼希来的低能儿 New Year's Eve edition! Man from Muncie a moron after all!
你没有这么迟钝 但你也没有这么可爱 You're not so slow, but you're not so swell.
看起来你毕竟还是个低能儿 And it looks like you're an imbecile after all.
当然 你的朋友们都叫你"笨蛋" Sure, sure. But your friends called you dope?
"傻瓜？""蠢货？""呆子？" Dipstick? Lamebrain? Schmo?
哦求求你伙计 这份管理电梯的工作是我的一切 Please, buddy, running the elevator, it's all I got.
诺维尔你让我失望了 Norville, you let me down.
你让艾森豪威尔太太失望 你让美国人民失望 You let Mrs. Eisenhower down. You let the American people down.
- 你死了就无法复生 - 哈哈哈 - And when you're dead, you stay dead. - Ha-ha-ha.
你死了 你死了 当然 当然 You stay dead, you stay dead. Sure, sure.
这孩子疯了已被正式宣布 The kid is screwy, it's oddicial.
现在那些疯人院的人正出来找他 The barred-window boys are out looking for him now.
我们将看到华尔街对这条… We'll see how Wall Street likes the news...
赫德萨克总裁 正步入禁闭房的新闻作何反应 that the president of Hudsucker is headed for the booby hatch.
一旦布罗芬布莱纳医生下定论… Heh, when Doc Bronfenbrenner gets through with him...
他就会需要尿布和滴漏杯 he'll need diapers and a dribble cup.
如果正是如此… Well, if that's all...
赫德万岁 Long live the Hud!
看着点… 你好伙计 Watch where you're... Hiya, buddy!
- 巴兹？ - 出来拿救济金？知道发生了什么？ - Buzz? - Out on the town, huh? Guess what?
席德…先生说我可以回去干老本行 Sid says I can have my old job back.
我应该有第二次机会他说的 I deserve a second chance, he says.
- 哈哈 - 巴兹 太好了 - Ha, ha. - Buzz, that's wonderful.
他说你剽窃了我的呼拉圈创意 怎么回事？ He told me you stole that swell hoop idea from me. What gives?
- 巴兹我从没有… - 天哪 那可是个奇妙的创意 - Buzz, I would never... - Gee, that was a swell idea.
席德说被你剽窃了 And Sid says you stoled it!
你还等什么 给他一拳 What are you waiting on, Clarence? Pop him one.
但是 巴兹… But Buzz...
他就是那个冒牌的大人物 He's that big-shot faker!
- 那个华尔街骗子 - 走火入魔 - That Wall Street fraud guy. - Nuttier than a fruitcake.
谁去叫警察 Somebody call the cops!
铃声送旧 铃声迎新 Ring out the old, ring in the new.
嘿 嘿 啊 Hey. Hey! Aah!
嘿 Hey.
严格来说我决不应该这么做… Strictly speaking, I'm never supposed to do this...
可你有更好的主意吗？ but have you got a better idea?
# She'll be driving Six white horses when she comes #
# She'll be driving six white horses #
# We'll all have chicken and dumplings When she comes #
# We'll all have chicken and dumplings Yes, we'll all have chicken and dumplings #
# We'll all have chicken and dumplings When she comes #
# She'll be coming round the mountain When she comes #
# She'll be coming round the mountain She'll be coming round the mountain #
# She'll be coming round the mountain When she comes #
# She'll be coming round the mountain I said coming round the mountain #
# Oh, yeah, coming round the mountain When she comes #
真喜欢这调子 你还好吗孩子？ Love that tune. How you doing, kid?
赫德萨克先生？ Mr. Hudsucker?
你觉得这东西怎么样？上面的人都戴这个 How do you like that thing? They're all wearing them upstairs.
一种时尚 不管怎样吧… Tsk, it's a fad. Anyway...
我发觉你和董事会… 之间有些问题 I see you've been having some, uh, problems with the board.
我猜是席德在逼迫你 诺曼 I guess Sidney's, uh, putting the screws to you, huh, Norman.
- 诺维尔 - 对对 - Norville. - Yeah, yeah.
你觉得他的道德标准如何 Say what you like about the man's ethics.
他是个全力以赴的商人 He's a balls-to-the-wall businessman.
他会不择手段打倒你 直击要害非常有效 Beat you any way he can. Straight for the jugular. Eddective.
有什么特殊原因吗？ Any particular reason...
你没有把我的蓝色信件给他 - 哦 you didn't give him my blue letter? - Oh.
诺曼 只是一个将死之人的遗言和愿望 不是什么大事 Jesus, Norman, just a dying man's last words and wishes, no big deal.
我肯定放错地方了 Mr. Hudsucker, I must've mislaid it...
在你的围裙口袋里 就放在那儿 It's in your apron pocket, right where you left it.
低能儿 Imbecile.
没有递送蓝色信件将被会解雇 Failure to deliver a blue letter is grounds for dismissal.
- 天哪 先生 我… - 哦 就快过年了 - Jeez, sir, I... - Oh, it's New Year's.
我不想增加你的不快 只是说说罢了 I'm not gonna add to your woes. I'm just saying.
想看看吗？你可以学些东西 Anyway, you wanna read it? You might learn something.
可以让你不再从从窗口跳下去 Might keep you from jumping out of any more windows.
蓝色信件 沃林·赫德萨克缄… "Blue letter from the desk of Waring Hudsucker...
"席德尼·J·穆斯伯格收 关于我的退出 to Sidney J. Mussburger, regarding my demise.
"亲爱的席德: 当你看这封信时 Dear, Sid, by the time you read this...
我应该已经加入上面的机构了… I will have joined the organization upstairs...
"一个令人兴奋的新开端 我将保留美好的…" an exciting new beginning. I will retain fond..."
- 记忆 - "那些我们一起度过的日子…" - Memories. - "Of the years you and I have spent..."
那是标准的辞职信格式 Yeah, yeah, standard resignation boilerplate.
跳读第二段 Go down to the second paragraph.
"你肯定想知道为什么我会决定… "You will no doubt be wondering why I've decided to end my tenure...
"结束我在赫德萨克和人世的任期 both at Hudsucker and here on Earth.
"从我们的资产负债表的角度来看… From the standpoint of our balance sheet and financials...
"当然我们做得很好 sure, sure, we're doing fine.
"但就我的私生活而言 我犯了严重的错误 But in my personal life, Sidney, I have made grave errors.
"我让我的成功变成了我的个性 I have let my success become my identity.
"我愚蠢地扮演着大人物… I have foolishly played the great man...
"结果却眼睁睁地看着自己的生活 越来越空虚 and watched my life become more and more empty as a result.
"我的空虚赶走了她… 她本来可以拯救我 My vanity drove away she who could've saved me.
"哦是的 如你所知 我曾经爱过一个女人 席德 Oh, yes, I loved a woman once, Sid, as you well know.
"一位美丽的迷人的女士… A beautiful, vibrant lady...
"天使 她聪明地预见到 选择你比选择我更合适" and angel who, in her wisdom, saw fit to choose you instead of I."
赫德萨克先生 Mr. Hudsucker.
略过这段 Skip this part.
下一页下一页 Next page. Next page!
"它将我引向我们的公司席德 以及它的未来 "This brings me to our company, Sid, and its future.
"作为持有者 我们下一任总裁 必须有与我同样的特权… Our next president must have the liberty I have had as owner...
"来进行尝试即使失落…" - 失败 to experiment and even fall." - Fail.
"也不用担心股东与急燥的董事会 的反复无常 "Without fear of the whims of the stockholders or an impatient board.
- "新总裁必须有失落…" - 失败 - The new president must be free to fall... - Fail!
"并学会纵然失败…" - 失落 and learn to fail... - Fall!
"也可从中吸取教训… 重新崛起 and rise again by applying what he has learned.
"这就是商场 这就是生活 Such is business. Such is life.
"因此我把我在赫德萨克企业… 所有的股份遗赠给… Accordingly, I hereby bequeath all of my shares in Hudsucker Industry...
"你和董事会所选出… 来继任我总裁之位的人 to whomever you and the board shall elect to succeed me as president.
"我估计那将会是你 席德尼 I assume this will be you, Sidney.
"如果不是 如果董事会选择了别人… 那么那么…" If not, if the board should choose someone else to be president then, then..."
运气真他妈的差 Tough titty toenails!
那个王八蛋会看到的 That'll show the bastard!
好继续 Okay, go ahead.
"我勉励你与新总裁共事… "Then I urge you to work with the new president...
"并在他需要提醒的时候提醒他… and remind him when he needs to be reminded...
"失败决不意味着绝望 that failure should never lead to despair.
"绝望只关注过去 商场如是… Despair looks only to the past, in business...
"情场亦如是 and in love."
未来就在眼前 The future is now.
"未来就在眼前 The future is now.
"当我们未来的总裁需要它时… "When our future president needs it...
"沃林·赫德萨克… 据此遗赠他… Waring Hudsucker, hereby bequeaths him...
"第二次机会" his second chance."
- 哈哈哈 - 啊 - Ha-ha-ha. - Aah!
明天早上把信送出去 Deliver that letter in the morning!
哈哈 哟嚯 呀哈 Ha, ha. Yoo-hoo! Yaa-haa!
于是1959来了 新的一年 And so began 1959. The New Year.
当他知道诺维尔继承了公司 席德尼起先有些沮丧 When he learned that Norville owned the company, Sidney was upset at first.
还好布罗芬布莱纳医生在… It's a good thing Doc Bronfenbrenner was there...
席德尼？ Sidney?
因为他能阻止席德尼伤害自己 because he was able to keep Sidney from harming his old self.
他被诊定需要长时间待在病院里… He prescribed a long rest in the sana... In the sanator, uh...
禁闭室里 In the booby hatch.
现在 诺维尔… Now, Norville, heh...
他继续用智慧和激情来管理… he went on and ruled with wisdom and compassion...
并又开始构思令人兴奋的新创意 and started dreaming up them exciting new ideas again.
你们知道 给孩子们的 You know, for kids.
我让下面R&D的孩子拼凑了这个原型… I had the boys down at R&D throw together this prototype...
这样我们的讨论就可以有焦点… so our discussion could have focus...
而且让各位先生对这个令人振奋的小发明 有一个直观的印象 and to give you gentlemen of the board a firsthand look.
这个故事讲述了诺维尔·巴恩斯 如何爬上… That's the story of how Norville Barnes climbed way up...
赫德萨克大大厦44楼… to the 44th floor of the Hudsucker building...
然后直线下坠 但没有粉身碎骨 and then fell all the way down, but didn't quite squish his self.
他们说 有个人从45楼跳了下来 You know, they say there was a man who jumped from the 45th floor.
可那是另一个故事 But that's another story.
导演 乔尔·科恩
制片 伊桑·科恩
编剧 伊桑·科恩 乔尔·科恩 萨姆·莱米