欢迎加入OCR小组 qq群906722936 字幕优先发布于群内
你不会还在社交媒体上偷窥诺拉的主页吧 Are you still stalking Nora?
她有150000个粉丝 She has 150, 000 followers.
等下 不会吧 她就是简单生活也美好这个账号 Wait, what? She's Simply Life Well Lived?
老天 你不会也关注她了吧 Oh, Jesus, you don't follow her, do you?
她很有野心 而且不是讨人厌的那种 I find her non- threateningly aspirational.
但我不再这样觉得了 她就是个下流的婊子 这些都是过去式了 Not anymore though. She's a gutter whore and dead to me.
这才是好闺蜜嘛 You're a true friend.
你别整晚钻牛角尖就行 Just don't spend all night going down the rabbit hole.
不然你会发疯的 That way madness lies.
我不会的 I won't.
太好了 你终于醒了 Oh, good, you're awake.
她说她去年第一次去了米克诺斯岛旅游 She said she went to Mykonos for the first time last year
还说这地方很有魅力 and found it charming.
但你看看这张照片三年前拍的 But in this photo, taken three years prior,
她家冰箱上明显就贴着个米诺克斯带回来的冰箱贴 you can clearly see a Mykonos magnet on her fridge.
我知道你想说什么 I know what you're thinking.
是别人给她从米诺克斯岛带回来的纪念品 Someone else brought her a souvenir from Mykonos,
但我看了她所有朋友 家人和同事的账号主页 but I went through all of her friends' and family and co- workers'profiles,
没人去米诺克斯岛旅游过 and none of them ever been to Mykonos.
她朋友海莉 她们六年级篮球课上认识的 她俩几年前 Her friend Hailey from sixth- form netball, they went for coffee
在赛文奥克斯一家盖尔咖啡店碰过面 但她们关系没那么好 in GAIL's in Sevenoaks years ago, but they're not close.
她在2012年和家人一起去了圣托里尼 She went to Santorini with her family in 2012.
她怎么可能会 或说能 And you want me to believe that you would or even could
在圣托里尼买到米诺克斯的冰箱贴呢 buy a Mykonos fridge magnet at Santorini?
这从营销角度来看根本说不通啊 It doesn't make any economic sense!
好吧 Okay.
有时 自爱就是告诉自己要努力工作 永不停歇 Sometimes self- love is telling yourself to work hard and never stop.
如果你真的爱自己 你会很乐意改善自己 保持自律 If you love yourself, you're happy to work on yourself and be disciplined.
我喜欢统一的色调 它让一切都井井有条 I love colour coordination. It totally optimises organisation.
花束真的可以改变一个地方 它们确实有点贵 Flowers really can transform a space. They do get expensive.
所以记得货比三家看看 It's worth shopping around.
有时这样做能让你的每周花束开销 Sometimes you can get your weekly flower budget
减少到50至100镑 down to 50 to 100 pounds.
抱歉 你能 Sorry, can you just- -
你在干什么 What are you doing?
阿尔菲今天要来 我在给这屋子搞儿童保护措施 Alfie's coming over today. I'm childproofing the flat.
我会尽力的 但我真的不喜欢和小孩待一起 I'll try my best, but I do not like being in the presence of children.
尤其是英国小孩 And English children.
妈咪 爸比 我可以吃点苹果吗 那太让人难受了 Mummy? Daddy? May I have some apples? It's disgusting.
没说你家的哈 显而易见 Not yours, though. Obviously.
我有好多要聊的 我会跟我儿子好好建立关系的 I've got so much bonding to catch up on. I'm gonna bond with that child so hard.
那我俩的关系呢 What about our bonding?
自从上次意外见了你妻儿后 我们都没什么时间 With all the surprise family stuff, we haven't really had time to do
-做情侣之间会做的事 -噢 比如哪些事呢 - the whole, like, dating kind of thing. Oh, like what?
比如说 促膝夜谈 一起野餐 Like, you know, staying up all night talking, having picnics,
突发奇想周末去巴黎旅游 going on spontaneous weekend breaks to Paris,
第一次吵架 fighting for the first time.
睡在一起 Sleeping together.
既然嘉莉和卡什现在不在 Although Carrie and Kash are out,
我们也许可以做一件刚刚提到的事呢 so we could check one of those things off the list.
感觉我们没那么多时间去巴黎 诺拉马上就要来了 I don't think we got time to go to Paris. Nora's gonna be here any minute.
-等下 诺拉也要来 来这里 -是啊 Wait, Nora's coming? Here? - Yeah.
等下 我是不是不该也邀请她来的 Oh, wait. Should I not have done that?
不不 挺好 No, no, it's good.
我也好多了解了解她 I should get to know her in person.
她的好恶 弱点 意图 Her likes, dislikes, weaknesses, intentions.
嗯 至少你们已经有个相同点了 Well, you've already got one thing in common.
-都认识你 -你们俩都是沙漏型身材 - You. - You're both bottom- heavy.
什么 What?
我们差点都要收到驱逐通知了 We almost got an eviction notice
就因为他没意识到他应该付自己的那份房租 because he didn't realise he had to start paying his share of the rent.
我已经不是卡什的女朋友了 I am not Kash's girlfriend anymore.
理所当然 我也不会出两人份的房租钱的 Of course, I'm not gonna pay rent for the both of us.
我是说 他根本不知道怎么自己处理事情 It's like- - Well, he doesn't know how to do anything on his own.
-他已经 -稍等 我有个会要开 Like he is almost Uh, I have a meeting.
我可以 Can I, um- -
噢 当然 没问题 克拉克 Oh, yeah. Of course, Clark.
你刚刚说他已经 Uh, "Like he's almost, uh- - "
噢 26岁了 谢谢你提醒我 Oh, 26. Thank you.
所以我跟他说 我说 So, I told him, I said,
卡什 你要学会独立了 Kash, you need to start being independent.
你得找份工作 你不能再指望我替你办事了 You need a job. You can't keep relying on me to do things for you. "
这对我们俩都不健康 懂吗 And it's not healthy for us, you know?
我们俩不能再互相纠缠了 We need to mutually disentangle.
老实说 我觉得我们俩都需要点空间 To be honest, I just think we just need a bit of space.
嘉莉 你会很高兴的 因为这是你最后一次给我跑腿送茶水了 Ah, Carrie. You'll be pleased to hear that's your last tea run.
我们给你找了个新助理 We've hired you a new assistant.
有工作啦 Got a job.
为了对卡什表示欢迎 我们轮流来破冰一下吧 To welcome Kash, let's go round the room and do an icebreaker.
姓名 超能力 冷知识 你们都清楚要说什么的 Name, power, fun fact. You know the drill.
我叫理查德 我能准确看出别人什么时候要来月经了 Richard. I can tell exactly when someone's going to get their period.
我还开过《明日帝国》电影里的阿斯顿·马丁跑车 And I've driven the Aston Martin from Tomorrow Never Dies.
嗨 我叫安妮塔 我可以用意念杀人 Hi, I'm Anita. I can kill someone just by thinking about it.
我还对干洗发剂过敏 And I'm allergic to dry shampoo.
我叫彼得 我可以随意改变性别 My name is Peter. I can change gender at will.
我穿着拖鞋登上过斯诺登山 And I climbed Snowdon with flip- flops on.
嘉莉 我可以和鬼魂交流 Carrie. Communion with the dead.
我要说的冷知识是 我最近和我男朋友分手了 My fun fact is that I recently broke up with my boyfriend.
我清楚记得和他谈过话 And I specifically remember having a conversation with him
如果我们要继续住在一起 that if we're gonna continue to live together,
我们得尊重对方的边界 we need to respect each other's boundaries.
我叫卡什 呃 我能倒转时间 Kash. Uh, rewind time.
虽然 我现在有点急于快进时间 我也控制不了 Although, I'm sort of jumping forward now, and I can't really control it.
这是连带着受影响的 It's a whole thing.
冷知识 嗯 我最近刚被分手了 Uh, fun fact, well I just got broken up with.
我本以为我找一份新工作是正确的选择 And I thought I was doing the right thing by getting a job,
但是显然 我什么事都做不好 but apparently, I can't do anything right.
还有 我在一家咖啡店里见过杰森·莫玛 Also, I once saw Jason Momoa in a Pret.
好棒啊 Fantastic.
-是啊 -我爱他 Yeah. - Love him.
-你好 是诺拉和阿尔菲 -你好 好的 · Hi. It's Nora and Alfie. - Hi. Yeah.
这是给谁准备的 Who's that for?
我要和我儿子玩抛接 I'm gonna play catch with my boy.
-你好啊 -你好 Hello. - Hi.
嘿 阿尔菲 接住 Hey, Alfiel Catch!
欢迎来到我们家 Welcome to our home.
你那天说你一点也不记得我们俩之间的事了 You said the other day you didn't remember anything about us,
所以我想着带点零散的照片过来 帮你回忆回忆 so I thought I'd bring some bits and pieces to help fill in the blanks.
都在这里了 我们的婚礼 度假 It's all here. Our wedding. Holidays.
噢 还有泰国 你那会儿可喜欢泰国了 Oh! Thailand. You loved Thailand.
我为什么和这桥一起拍了照 Why am I friends with this bridge?
你帮忙设计的呀 小傻瓜 你是个结构工程师呢 You helped design it, silly. You're a structural engineer.
嘿 快看 爸比以前是建筑师 Hey, look. Daddy used to build things.
爸比不吓人哦 爸比不会朝你扔手套的 Daddy's not scary. Daddy wouldn't throw gloves at you.
等等 别 拜托回来吧 Wait. No. Come back pleasel
-爸比 不要 -别因为我爱你就跑啊 Daddy, nol- Don't run from love.
离我远点 Stay away from mel
那你呢 珍 你是做什么的 So, what about you, Jen? What do you do?
呃我 我在商店打工 Eh, I- I work in a shop.
情侣都会一起去买东西 不是吗 Couples go shopping together, don't they?
你和你男朋友一起去买东西吗 Do you go shopping with your boyfriend?
我现在没有男朋友 I'm not currently seeing anyone.
我哪儿来这么多时间对吧 Where would I find the time?
老实说 我还没找新的 自从 To be honest, I haven't since...
那你单身也挺幸福吗 还是 And are you happy being alone, or- -
这是他毕业典礼上拍的 His graduation.
我们大一第一周就认识了 不用说 他成绩比我好多了 We met first week of freshers. Course, he got better grades than me.
我也不差呢 I too was not bad.
如果这是你 呃 天啊 我也不知道 I- If that's what you, um- - Gosh. I wouldn't know.
别跑 Don't run!
别来抓我 Leave me alone!
拜托了别跑我想和你好好做朋友的 Please don't run. Let me bond with you!
-开始 -等下 别转太快了 ·Go. - Wait, not too fast.
-不不 信我 关键都在于腿 -你确定 No, no, trust me. It's all in the legs. - You sure?
天啊 gosh.
空气动力学 Aerodynamic.
-卡什 我觉得我们该聊聊 -好的 头儿 Kash? I think we should talk about- - - Yes, boss.
-我觉得我们该聊聊 -继续说 头儿 - I think we should talk- - - Go ahead, boss.
我觉得我们该聊聊 I think we should talk about- -
别再转了 Stop spinning!
你是真想要这份工作 还是你故意想惹我啊 Do you actually want this job, or are you just winding me up?
不我真的想要 你说的对 我得学学怎么自力更生了 No, I do. Really, you're right. I need to learn how to stand on my own two feet.
给我找点事情做吧 我会做的 Like, give me something to do. I'll do it.
先做点简单的吧 我需要五份这个的复印件 Here's something simple. I need five copies of this.
好的 头儿 Yes, boss.
爸比说他睡在浴缸里 Daddy said he sleeps in the bath.
爸比只是在开玩笑 Daddy's just being funny.
-爸比是没有家吗 -不 宝贝 怎么会呢 - Is Daddy homeless? - No, darling. No.
我用普通的就够了啊 Regular does me fine.
那好像是我的包吧 That's my bag.
噢 天啊 Oh! Oh, God!
这是你的包哇 我有个一模一样的 Is this your bag? I have one just like it.
我 我以为这是我的那个 所以我才在翻它的 I- I thought it was mine......is why I was looking in it.
珍 如果你好奇我的任何事情 你可以直接问我的呀 Jen, if you want to know anything about me, you know you can just ask.
我也有很多问题想问你呢 I have so many questions about you.
这很正常啊 It's only natural.
对 是啊 是啊 就比如我们俩怎么相处的好好的 Yeah, right. Yeah, like, why are we so good together?
他是怎么谈上这么性感的你的 How'd he get someone so hot?
比如你为什么和我丈夫上床 Why are you fucking my husband?
我在开玩笑呢 在开玩笑呢 珍 I'm joking. I'mjoking, Jen.
你没听出来嘛 我在开玩笑呢 Obviously, I'm joking.
-如果我真心讨厌你 我是不会说这种话的 不是吗 -确实 - If I actually hated you, I wouldn't say something like that, would I? - No.
是啊 听着 我不想让你觉得我从你身边把他抢走或什么的 Yeah. Look, I don't want you to think I stole him or anything.
但 如果我当时知道他有主人 Okay, I did steal him off the street, but......if I knew he had an owner-
我是说 妻子 我就不会这么干了 I mean, a wife, then obviously I wouldn't have.
不 我们肯定就不会 No, we would not have- -
当然 那当然 Of course. Of course.
我是说 生活就像这样是场疯狂的冒险 I mean, life is a crazy adventure,
我们也控制不了命运对吧 and we can't control what fate brings us.
是啊 天 我很庆幸我们把话都说开了 Yeah. God, I'm so glad we got that out in the open.
那是 我真喜欢我俩之间没有遮遮掩掩的 Absolutely. I love this transparency for us.
我们还有剩的猫粮吗 我觉得阿尔菲会很喜欢小动物的 Do we still have cat food? I think Alfie might like animals.
有 在中间的架子上 Yeah, it's in the middle shelf.
呃 因为那能帮我变成一只猫 Um, because it helps me turn into a cat.
我知道 I know.
你可能会这么想 但三文鱼真是意外地令我垂涎欲滴啊 You'd think so, but the salmon is surprisingly moreish.
-我猜也是 -是啊是啊 - I suppose. Yeah. Yeah.
之前还没想到过这点呢 Hadn't thought about it like that before.
两位 怎么回事 能告诉我下怎么回事吗 Hello. What's happening? Tell me what's happening.
天啊 真是抱歉 心灵感应 Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. Telepathy.
我们以前经常这样心灵感应聊天 We used to have our own conversations in our heads all the time.
只能说是 改不掉的老习惯 Old habits, I guess.
我得出去开个会 这几个小时里你能帮忙看下阿尔菲吗 I have to pop out for a meeting. Can you watch Alfie for a few hours?
等下 所以你们俩不开囗也能聊天 Wait. So you can talk to each other without talking?
我猜 这就像我们有自己的秘密语言一样 It was like having our own secret language, I guess.
是不是呀 罗伯 Wasn't it, Rob?
噢不 她平常表情就这样 Oh, no. That's just her face.
我觉得她挺喜欢你的 I think she likes you.
我只想今晚玩的开心 ♪I just wanna have fun tonight ♪
呃 它印出来就这么大 Uh, it came out big.
我只想今晚玩的开心 ♪I just wanna have fun tonight ♪
-这是怎么 -它印出来就这样 How did it- - - It came out big.
理查德刚给你发了个新案子文件 吃中饭之前他要看到 Richard's just sent you a new case file. He needs them by lunch.
但我 But I- -
让我帮你吧 我可以帮忙做什么 Oh, let me help. Uh, what can I do?
还是我自己来吧 谢谢 I've got it actually. Uh, thank you.
哒哒哒 哒 哒 ♪Do- do- do, do, do♪
嘉莉 快来 我想给你看点东西 Carrie! Come on. I wanna show you something.
是这样的 我意识到我们有个只用来放文具的橱柜 So, I realised that we had a cupboard just for stationery,
这太浪费空间了 which is an inefficient use of space.
所以我按自己的想法把它整理了一下 So, I reorganised it on my own initiative.
我发现 如果把这些文具一起扔到一个大袋子里 I discovered that if you throw all the stationery together in one big bag,
能给其他东西腾出不少地方呢 it frees up space for other stuff.
比如 Like
给这个橘子 this orange.
你能等我一下吗 Would you excuse me for one second?
你喜欢这个新样子吗 Do you like it?
轻点哦 Be gentle.
嘿 小伙 Hey, champ.
你妈妈是什么样的人 你妈妈给你什么感觉呀 So, what's your mummy like? What's Mummy's vibe?
给我展示下你的超能力 Show me your power.
第一 要说请 第二 我没有超能力 One, please. Two, I don't have a power.
为什么 Why?
-我不知道 我就是没有 -其他人都有 - I don't know. I just don't. - Everyone else does.
我很清楚 I'm very aware of that.
你妈妈有提过想和爸爸复合吗 Has Mummy ever mentioned wanting Daddy back?
别拉你爸爸的尾巴 No, don't pull your dad's tail.
-你是坏了吗 -没有 - Are you broken? - No.
上帝讨厌你吗 Does God hate you?
嗯 行吧 上帝讨厌我 Yes. Okay, God hates me.
听着 你要是告诉我点你妈妈的事情 我就给你五镑怎么样 Look, I'll give you a fiver if you tell me about your mum.
妈咪有和她朋友聊起过你 Mummy was talking about you to her friend.
是吗 她说了些什么 她原话是什么 Was she? What did she say? What did she say exactly?
你这小孩儿 Oh, my God.
我不记得了 I don't remember.
卡什太无能了 我现在可以说是在干两人份的活 Kash is so useless. I'm basically doing two jobs.
我好累啊 我 我办不到 I'm so tired. I- I can't do this.
那就让他被炒了呗 So, get him fired.
这会不会有点过分了 Isn't that a bit mean?
不管怎样他都会被炒的 如果硬要说 这是对他的宽容 It's gonna happen eventually. If anything, it's a mercy.
怎么才能让他被炒呢 How do you get someone fired?
那简单 我都被炒了不知道多少次了 Oh, easy. I've been fired loads of times.
让我想想 偷东西 撒谎说我会开重型货车 Let's see. Stealing supplies. Lying about being able to drive a HGV.
噢 喝醉了来上班 设计了少儿不宜的玩偶 Ooh, coming into work high. Building inappropriate bears.
毒品 Drugs.
我可以在他的办公桌里栽赃毒品 I could plant drugs in his desk.
你 你想去买点毒品 You? You are going to buy drugs?
我要去买毒品 怎么买 I'm gonna buy drugs. How do you buy drugs?
我会把步骤发给你的 I'll send you instructions.
你在哪里打这通电话的 听起来回音好明显啊 Where are you calling from? It sounds echoey.
-小猫咪 不要走 -我在浴缸里躲一个小孩呢 Kitty! Stay still I m hiding in the bath from a child.
阿尔菲和诺拉在我们家 Alfie and Nora are visiting.
天啊 那诺拉这人怎么样 Oh, my God. What's Nora like?
我没有理由不喜欢她啊 I don't have any reason to not like her.
她人挺好的 She's just nice.
噢 听到这我真是抱歉 Oh. I'm so sorry.
我知道对吧 I know.
要是吉兹觉得她又贴心又成功 What if Jizz notices that she's sweet and successful
而且闻起来像祖玛珑的味道 更喜欢她怎么办 and smells like Jo Malone, and he prefers her?
放心吧不会的 That is not gonna happen.
你也散发着独特的香味 不比她差 You have your own unique smell that is just as good.
只是这真的很烦人 她了解吉兹的一切事情 It's just annoying, because she knows everything about Jizz.
我们却只在一起 一周吧大概 And we've been going out- - what, a week?
真可惜你不能给时间加速 Pity you couldn't just speed things up.
我不小心抓伤了我儿子 I mauled my boy.
深呼吸 是时候突围了 ♪Breathe in, time to break out ♪
没有压力 我们现在完全清醒了 ♪ No stress We're wide awake now ♪
年轻人 抹去我们的错误吧 ♪Young blood, erase our mistakes now ♪
因为我现在正在狂欢中爆炸 ♪Cause I'm blasting at the rave now ♪
不能停下 因为我正在执行任务 ♪Can't stopCause I'm goin'on a mission ♪
消息传开 每个人都就位了 ♪The word is out Everyone in position ♪
你好 你是 Hello. Are you- -
噢 你是的 Yes, you are.
呃 我可以来一份你卖的最不违法的毒品吗 谢谢 Uh, can I please have one serving of your least illegal drug? Please.
你是警察吗 Are you a cop?
我 不不 Me? No.
我看过很多集《大侦探波洛》不过这算不上吧 I watch a lot of Poirot, but I don't think that counts.
20镑 That'll be 20.
取款机只给了我50镑的 Um, the machine was only giving out 50s.
可以找零吗 Could I get my change?
行 我有意念转账的超能力 Yeah, I've got the power to do bank transfers with my mind.
那你就这么干吧 好的 太好了 So, you'll do it that way. Got it. Great.
嗯 我已经转好了 Yeah, I've just done it.
太棒了 谢谢 Amazing. Thank you.
迅速抓住机会 跟上节奏 ♪ Quick to the hip, stick ♪
发泄情绪 ♪Blowin'off steam ♪
最好别让我抓到你的虚张声势 国王对于女王又算得了什么 ♪I better not catch your bluff What's a king to a queen? ♪
在我的聚光灯下小心翼翼 所有的目光都集中在我身上 ♪ Watch your back in my spotlight All they eyes on me ♪
嘉莉 你签过劳伦的卡片子吗 Carrie, have you signed Lauren's card?
你在干什么 What are you doing?
这是毒品吗 Are those drugs?
不 戴夫 这只是扑热息 No, Dave. It's paracetamol.
噢 我可以来一片吗 Oh. Can I have one?
-我头痛欲裂 -不行 这些是我的扑热息 I've got a splitting headache. - No! They're my paracetamol.
噢 你有扑热息 能借我一片吗 Oh, you got paracetamol? Can I bum one?
我打球的手肘又开始犯疼了 My squash elbow's playing up.
不行 不能借你 我需要这些因为我痛经 No, you can't. I need them. I have period cramps.
但你还有八天零44分钟才来月经啊 But you're not due on for another eight days and 44 minutes.
你可违反《通用数据保护条例》了哦 理查德 That's a breach of GDPR there, Richard.
这话就这么蹦出来了 It just came out.
我要去桑德拉那里登记下你刚刚说的了 I'm gonna have to log that with Sandra.
信我的 你今天可不会想碰上桑德拉的 Trust me, today's not a good day to run up Sandra.
你又来了 You're doing it again.
不 老兄 她都没回复呢 Nah, mate, she didn't even reply.
-是你叫的时间加速吗 -嗯 ·You ordered a speed up? - Yeah.
兄弟 那真的太奇怪了 Bro, it's so strange.
-你收到我的要求了吗 -不 是很糟 嗯 - You got my request? - Nah, it's bad. Yeah.
-收 收到了吗 -等等 这谁啊 Y- Yeah? - Wait, who's this?
我觉得我们可以自己加速几个月时间的 没什么大不了的 I thought we could fast- forward ourselves a few months. No biggie.
-你说什么 -是谁要加速啊 What? - Who's going forward?
呃 只是提前过六个月左右 加速版的 You know, just like live out the next six months or so, but, like, quickly.
我 我不想给人生加速啊 我已经错过那么多了 I- - I don't want to speed up my life. I've already missed so much of it.
我已经错过和这小孩共度这么多年的时光了 Like all those years with the kid?
这小孩是吧 The kid?
什么 What?
我不理解 这么着急干什么 I don't understand. What's the rush?
-没为什么 好吗 -这不算个理由 Just because, okay? - That's not a reason.
-就信我这一回 -我喜欢顺其自然 Just trust me on this. - I like time the way it is.
有人还希望只要打个响指 People wish they could snap their fingers
就能和别人共度余生了呢 and be in a long- term relationship.
那也太傻了我怎么会想要和你共度的时间变少呢 That's stupid. Why would I want less time with you?
噢 现在变成我傻了是吗 Oh, so I'm stupid?
兄弟 等等 别说话 这对情侣在吵架呢 Mate, mate, wait. Wait. This couple's having an argument.
好吧 那我想我们只能像废物一样 Fine. I guess we'll just relish the joys of budding romance
实时享受恋情萌发的喜悦了 in real time like fucking losers.
听着 只是 你和诺拉 Look- - It's just- - You and Nora.
我感觉你们一起有着数不清的回忆 I feel like you have this lifetime of memories together,
-我完全比不上 -可我一点也不记得了 and I can't compete with it. I don't remember them.
和她共度时光的是罗伯特 不是现在的我 That's Robert, not me.
我还记得我们第一次见面 I remember the first time we met.
阳光透过你的发丝 还有你粉粉的指甲 Uh, the sun was in your hair, and you had pink nails,
你闻起来像小飞龙酸奶的味道 and you smelled a bit like a Petit Filous.
我还记得你第一句对我说的话 And I remember the first thing you said to me.
噢 真是甜蜜啊 不是吗 Oh, that's sweet, innit?
我感觉好像说对了什么话 我说的是好话吗 I feel like I said something right. Did I say something right?
的确 You did.
我渴了 I'm thirsty.
自1584年创作出来后《圣母玛利亚的圣母像》一直 The Madonna of the Blessed Virgin has been in the Montague family
属于蒙太古家族 since its creation in 1584.
这个家族要求原画家 The family have requested that the original artist,
也就是 乔瓦尼·彼得罗·迪阿戈斯蒂内利 修复这幅画 Giovanni Pietro DiAgostinelli, restore the painting
这也是原委托协议中写好的 as was laid out in the original commission agreement.
迪阿戈斯蒂内利先生会通过我们提供的渠道 Mr DiAgostinelli will work through our conduit
使用尽可能接近原材料的材料 using materials that are as close as possible to the originals,
保留这幅画的价值 这也是我们今天的当务之急 fidelity being the order of the day, to preserve the painting's value.
忽略那个声音 那只是我的心跳声 Don't mind that sound. It's just my heart beating.
好 行 那我们着手开始吧 Right, well, yes, I suppose we should get started.
她低血糖了 Low blood sugar.
我们休个茶歇 一会儿继续吧 Let's have a tea break and, uh, reconvene.
坐下 坐下就好了 Just sit, just sit.
你怎么回事 你的瞳孔扩散的好大啊 What is up with you? Your pupils are massive.
你是忘了喝无咖啡因茶 不小心喝了浓茶吗 Did you accidentally have full- strength tea instead of decaf?
没错没错 你说的对 Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
你如果把茶这个词换成我街头上买的强效毒品 那你就说对了 If you replace tea with hard drugs that I bought on the street, then yes.
-你怎么眨眼眨这么快 -什么 你为什么要磕药啊 - Why are you blinking so loudly? - What, why did you take drugs?
好吧 简单来说 有个叫卡什的人 Okay, so basically, there's this guy Kash,
我想把毒品栽赃到他办公桌上 好让他被炒了 and I'm trying to get him fired by planting drugs on his desk.
我就是卡什 I'm Kash.
真好啊 哇 Good for you. Wow.
我得把毒品栽赃到他办公桌上 因为他太无能了 So, I need to plant drugs in his desk because he's so useless.
我在干两人份的活 I'm doing all his work and my own.
他要学会自力更生 He's got to learn to be independent.
要是一直有嘉莉在 帮他操心这操心那的 How is he supposed to learn how to be independent
他怎么可能学会自力更生呢 when Carrie keeps doing everything for him?
-嘉莉听上去真的像个贱人啊 -你就是嘉莉本人 - Carrie sounds like a real fucking bitch. - You're Carrie.
嘉莉这么做有她的道理 Carrie has a point.
行吧 Okay.
好了 赶紧把这喝了 Okay, just drink this.
你得在昏暗的房间里躺上四五个小时 You need to lie down in a darkened room for four to five hours
还要听着白噪音 and listen to ambient soundscapes.
切 我才不要听你的建议 Pfft. I'm not taking advice from you.
嗯 这也许是唯一个我比你清楚怎么做的情况了 Yeah, this might be the only situation where I know more than you do.
赶紧回家吧 放轻松 你会没事的 Now, just go home. Relax. You'll be fine.
我没事 我很好 好得很呢 I am fine. Feel fine. Absolutely fine.
嘉莉 你的脚都没有着地 Carrie, you're not touching the floor.
回家吧 Just go home.
反正你现在这样也用不了超能力了 你还能在这干什么呢 You can't use your power anyway. What good are you?
那我就要假装用超能力了 Oh! Gonna fake it.
-别 别这么干 -没人会看出来的 - No, don't do that. - Nobody's gonna know.
不 别 No. No- -
呃 他们要你回会议室了 Uh, they want you back in the boardroom.
噢 好的 没 没问题 Oh, okay. Y- Yeah.
我下不来了 I can't get down.
只有一个东西让我感觉比小孩还毛骨悚然的 There's only one thing that creeps me out more than children,
那就是老人 and that's old people.
他为什么一直在嚼嚼 他嘴里啥也没有啊 Why is he chewing? There's nothing in his mouth.
他的心智是和小孩还是和老人一样呢 Does he have the mind of a child or an old man?
我想吃葡萄千 I want my raisins.
我想吃葡萄干 I want my raisins.
看不出来 I can't teJl
天啊 我们拿他怎么办 Oh, God, what are we gonna do with him?
我说过想和我儿子共度一此美好时光的 I wanted to spend quality time with my boy.
我说过想和我儿子共度一些美好时光的 I wanted to spend quality time with my boy.
该死的 我要说到做到 And goddamn it, that's what I'm gonna do.
但鞋子不合适 JBut the shoes don't fit J
推我下去 我也不想独身一人 ♪Push me down I don't wanna be lonely too ♪
接着 阿尔菲 Here, Alf
我猜我永远都得不到我想要的东西 ♪I guess I'm never gonna get What I want ♪
因为我只想和你独处 ♪Cause all I wanna get Is alone with you ♪
你天生就适合打球 阿尔菲 You re a natural, Alfie.
因为我只想要是独身一人 ♪'Cause all I wanna get is alone ♪
阿尔菲 阿尔菲 醒醒 Alfie? Alfie? Alfie? Alfie?
走啊 继续走啊 Go on, keep walking.
他没事 He's all right.
老天啊 Oh, my God.
好吧行 Right, okay.
这回看你了 卡什 It's up to you, Kash.
你还是有点用的 You're not seless.
好了 还有时间想出个计划 Right, there's still time to come up with a plan.
噢不 Oh, no.
明白我意思了吧 See what I mean?
乔瓦尼 怎么样了
-好激动 -我也是 I'm excited. - Me too!
他画完了 已经画完了 He's done. He's done.
-你喜欢不 -你干了什么啊 You like it? - What have you done?
没人比我现在还难过了吧 No one's ever been sadder than I am right now.
嗯 崩溃的时刻啊 Yep. That's the comedown.
难以置信我要对你说这个 但是你得提供一份样本进行药检 I can't believe I'm saying this, but I need you to give a sample for a drug test.
想必我不用重申我司对毒品零容忍吧 I needn't reiterate our zero- tolerance policy.
-我要被炒了 -不会的 搞一份别人的样本就好了 - I'm gonna get fired. - No, get someone else to do it for you.
他们就会觉得你刚刚只是精神严重崩溃了 They'll think you had a catastrophic mental breakdown.
可是找谁呢 Who though?
我信任你来 I trust you to do this for me.
我的荣幸啊 It would be my honour.
我知道你想在酒吧见我 ♪I know you wanna meet me at the bar ♪
是个正常人都会提供尿液样本的 People usually give a urine sample.
怎么了 What?
他睡着的时候看起来好安宁哦 They look so peaceful when they're asleep.
他流了好多口水 He's drooling a lot.
确实 He is.
我真是个糟糕的父亲 I'm a terrible dad.
嘿不 我才是糟糕的那个 我是个糟糕的 Hey, no. It's me. I'm a terrible- -
继母 Stepmum?
天啊 我现在成性感辣妈了吗 总觉得离这一步还差的远呢 Oh, my God, am I a MILF now? You always think you have more time.
诺拉回来了 我怎么办 要是她再也不让我见他了怎么办 It's Nora. What do I do? What if she never lets me see him again?
诺拉 你会开得怎么样 这里一切都挺好 Nora. How was your meeting? It's all good here.
我们一起读了书 我们去了公园 We did some reading. We went to the park,
不小心把你儿子变成了要领养老金的年纪 还一起吃了中饭 accidentally turned your son into a pensioner, had lunch.
抱歉 你说什么 Sorry, what?
妈咪 Mummy.
阿尔菲 Alfie?
请别怪在吉兹头上 Uh, please don't blame Jizz.
-不是他的问题 -坐下 It wasn't his fault. - Sit down.
我是想加速时间的 结果那个人搞错了 I was trying to speed up time, and the guy got confused.
但是 要我说搞点染发剂 Although, you know, I'd say with a bit of hair dye,
他看起来还像是精力充沛的68岁的人吧 he could pass for a sprightly 68?
你为什么要给时间加速啊 Why were you trying to speed up time?
噢 因为我们只在一起一周时间 Oh, because we've only been going out for a week,
-她感觉你对她是个威胁 -我 and she's threatened by you. - I-
我们还没去过巴黎呢 And we've not been to Paris.
-呃 这 -也还没上过床 Well, that- - - Or slept together yet.
噢 但我们确实吵过架了 是件好事 Oh, but we did have a fight though. So, that's good.
你没必要觉得我对你来说是个威胁的 You don't need to feel threatened by me.
我们俩没必要因为一个男人 陷入那老一套的争吵对吧 There's no need for us to fall into lazy, predictable conflict because of a man.
是啊 我举双手赞成 Yeah! Oh, I totally agreel
太好了 Amazing.
罗伯 别担心阿尔菲的事 Rob, don't worry about Alfie.
我有个很棒超能力保险 我可以让这恢复原样的 I've got great power insurance. I can get this reversed.
说到安排 你觉得可以 So, in terms of schedule, do you think you could.
珍 没错我在和你讲话呢 你这个他妈的傻瓜 Jen. Yeah, I'm talking to you, you fucking idiot.
你真觉得我不在意这些吗 Do you really think I'm cool with this?
觉得我一点也不在意 我丈夫玩失踪四年 That I'm just super chill about my husband fucking off
就为了当一只猫 for four years to be a cat?
搞得像个过不负责任的休学年一样 Like some ball- licking gap year
我却含辛茹苦负着房贷 还要养活这小家伙 while I pay the mortgage and keep that brat alive?
结果他回来的时候 居然在和一个古怪精灵的贱人约会 And when he does come back, he's dating some Manic Pixie Dream Slut?
我正打算PUA他 让他全职照料那个 I was just going to guilt him into being a full- time nanny
好让我税收抵免的小家伙呢 for that little tax credit over there.
但这还远远不够 But that's not enough.
你说对了一件事 我是他的主人他属于我的 You were right about one thing. I am his owner. He belongs to me.
我花了这么多年驯化了那个男人 让他听命于我 I spent years domesticating that man to do whatever I want,
你真觉得能凭你这大胸和没养老金 就这样介入我俩之间 and you think you can waltz in here with your perky tits and no pension
然后发展一个该死的古怪的韦斯·安德森式的爱情故事吗 and have a quirky little fucking Wes Anderson love story?
再好好想想吧 贱人 Well, think again, cunt.
你从我这里夺走了他 我现在要把他夺回来 You've taken something from me, and I'm going to take it back.
我和他上床的时候 我会的 我会想象着你孤独可怜的样子 And when I fuck him, which I will, I'll be thinking of you alone and sad.
然后我会因此而猛烈高潮 因为我一点也不喜欢你 And I'll come like a fucking landmine. Because I just don't like you.
我他妈的就知道是这样 I fucking knew it.
是哪样 Knew what?
没什么 抱歉 Nothing. Sorry.
好了 我们要走了 Okay, we're off.
我会跟你说长笛课的事的 I'll let you know about the flute lessons.
好的好的 Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
很高兴见到你 珍 Lovely to meet you, Jen.
我也是 诺拉 You too, Nora.
再见 Bye.
真是一个多么幸福的大家庭啊 Just one big, happy family.
我就像这样 I was like this.
-这明显是假的嘛 -就这她还信了 ·Like what is that? - And she bought it?
是啊 Yeah.
真为她感到抱歉呢 I almost feel bad for her.
五十镑买摇头丸也还好啦 Fifty for mandy ain't bad.
那里面装的是扑热息 It was paracetamol.
你好会使坏哦 You're bad.